


Heal my Heart

by Phantomhive97



Category: The Society (TV 2019)
Genre: Bastard Campbell, Bestfriend Luke, Bottom Grizz Gareth Visser, Chronic Illness, Comprehensive Luke, Domestic Violence, Everybody has a power, Grizz Gareth Visser centered, Grizz is physically strong but is emotionally fragile, Healing, Hurt Grizz, Hurt Sam, Hurt/Comfort, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, Implied/Referenced Homophobia, Implied/Referenced Rape/Non-con, Implied/Referenced Self-Harm, M/M, Mild Sexual Content, Minor Character Death, Parallele universe, Top Sam Eliot, multi-chapter, powers
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-05-18
Updated: 2019-12-09
Packaged: 2020-03-07 08:54:26
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 52
Words: 95,020
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18869902
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Phantomhive97/pseuds/Phantomhive97
Summary: Grizz never had it easy. Grew up with very poor health, a dead mum and an abusive dad, not the childhood you would want.And there he was now ; encaged in a fucking parallele universe into the very town that had him suffer so much through the years, about to come out of the closet and blow everything he knows away.





	1. Childhood

**Author's Note:**

> First Fanfic ever, please be tolerant  
> Please give me your opinion on my work, tell me what you wanna see happen or what is not great...  
> This is basically a fanfic centered on Grizz even if other characters will be involved.
> 
> DISCLAIMER I do not own the characters of The Society by the amazing Christopher Keyser.
> 
> Hope you like it !

With a poorly trained heart, Grizz spent his first few years at the hospital with nothing else than the sound of a machine making his body function for him. Got out of the hospital at four but had a few relapses with time. But it was on the day of his eighth birthday that everything started going down for him.

After having a party at their house with a few friends ; Harry, Luke, Jason, Will, Clark, etc. Grizz's mother, Ellen, drove her cute and adorable son to the movie to see the last Disney on screen. She just had had another fight with her husband, Logan, like always when he was drunk. She was so upset that her husband would drink so much at her eight years old son's birthday but that wasn't the real reason she left with the boy.  
That bastard had slapped young Grizz because he asked for more cake and had taken a beating on him screaming he never wanted the child and that he had fucked his entire life up.

Ellen was a tolerant and caring woman but if anyone threathend her boy, she could become a real lioness. She refused to raise her beautiful innocent and caring child into this kind of family and would do everything she could to prevent Logan to touch him ever again. Ellen knew her husband and she could catch a glimpse in his eyes from time to time when he was watching Grizz that crept her out. She could feel that Logan was a violent man but always thought he had it under control.  
The moment she understood that what she saw in her husband's eyes was not only the look of a father on a cute child but the one of a sexual predator on a beautiful innocent prey, she knew she had to run away with the kid. That's why she had left town this night, pretending to go to the movie with Grizz. Keep him safe, keep him brave and unharmed. That was her job. Her duty and pride. And she knew she had largely failed when she saw the other car coming.

Grizz was playfully singing in the car with his beloved mother, so excited to go see a real movie at the cinema. He loved his mother, more than anything in the world; she was supportive, tolerant and so kind to him. She always knew what to say and what to do when he was feeling bad because of his sickness or his father snapping at him.  
Tonight, he sensed that his mum was really sad and ultimately took the blame for it. He didn't know why but he had this strange capacity of sensing others feelings so clearly that it became really scary some times. He didn't really intend to break through their privacy but he didn't control this... the feelings just flew over him like waves and made him the most selfless and compassionate kid around town.

He felt his mother distress but tried to lighten up the mood by singing his heart out on the song currently playing in the car. He himself was deeply sad because of his father snapping at him but his mother was more important for him than his own feelings. He loved his daddy, for sure, but in reality he feared him. He was scared by Logan; nobody never knows how he's gonna behave, what he's gonna say, will he be a caring and loving husband and father or a fucking jerk of a bastard.  
Logan was really scary because he had strength but Grizz promised to himself never to let him hurt his mother. He may be fragile or weak because of his disease but his real heart is brave, his mind free and his will strong. He would never let his mother get hurt in anyway.

Despite the joy that going to the movie created in him, Grizz somehow understood that their leave was not just a trip to the movie. The had left home with a big bag full of clothing and belongings and he had heard Ellen talk on the phone with his grandmother. His mother wasn't just sad as she was the other time she had a fight with Logan. This time was different and he knew it.  
She was scared. She was afraid of what Logan could do to her, to her dear boy. She didn't actually know what he was capable of so she had decided it was time to run away. Grizz could feel all those emotions building in his mum. With a small sad smile, he said :

"Hey mum, don't worry, everything is gonna be fine, I promise _.._." and suddenly saw the lights of the other car reflected on his eyes.

_It was too late._


	2. The Accident

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Grizz wakes up at hospital... bad news.

When Grizz woke up he was at the hospital.

« _Geez, not again.._.» he told himself.

During his short life, Grizz had had his fair chair of hospital rooms, deadly smells and the awfull taste of meds. But when he tried to straighten himself up in a seated position, he winced in pain.

"What the..."

Taking in his surroundings, suddenly everything that happend the night before came in a rush in his mind. The birthday party, the fight with his drunk dad, his mother's sadness and the...

"Oh my god... Mum !"

Despite the terrible pain he was in, he tried to get up only to collapse on the floor. Completely awake now and with wide panicked eyes, he understood fast that he was badly injured. But he didn't care, he had to get to his mother, had to know she was fine. Crawling to the door, he began hyperventiling as a panic attack sized him forcefully.

« _Is she okay? Was she hurt? What if she's badly injured like me? What happend? Where is she? Where is dad? Is she in the hospital? I have to find her, tell her I'm fine. She must be worried sick by now. I HAVE TO FIND HER!_ » he whispered frantically.

All of a sudden, the door bursted open and in came a nurse with a wild look on her face.

"Oh my god, what are you doing on the floor like that? Are you ok ?!" she said kneeling down at the injured kid.

Taking in the state of the panicking eight years old, she tried to calm him the best she could.

"Okay, everything is gonna be fine, just try to breathe with me on four. Breathe in, one, two, three, four... And now breathe out, one, two, three, four... That's it, you're fine, everything is gonna be fine." she reassured the sobbing child.

Grizz started calming down and tears began to roll down his now red cheeks. The nurse helped him on his feet, trying to get him to lie down.

"No, I'm not going back on my bed, I need to see my mother, she was with me on the car. Where is she? Is she okay? What happend?"

"Well, I'll explain everything once you settle down, you're badly injured and you're heart is barely keeping up thanks to the meds but first I need you to calm down and listen to me, alright?" said the nurse.

"No! I need to see her now! She must be so worried, I have to go to her cause..."

"Please stop ! You can't see her right now, neither of you are in any state to do anything at the moment so please just stand down and let me explain..."

Grizz felt then a wave of depressed and sad feelings coming from her. He didn't want to worry her so much and she said she would explain everything to him so he limped to his bed and tried to lie down. He felt a sharp pain at his side and his right leg and began to take in his own state. He looked terrible. Every part of his body hurt and he could barely take all this pain without fainting, but he had to stay awake; he had to know what the hell happend.

The nurse sat down near his bed, trying to get herself together, dreading the kid's reaction to what she was about to tell him. After a few minutes in heavy silence, she was the first to speak up.

"Listen kid... I have some bad news. Two days ago, you and your mum got involved in a car accident. She didn't do anything wrong but a truck kind of rushed right into your car and crashed into you. The driver was drunk and didn't even try to slow down, that's why he crashed into your car so badly... the truck driver was just a bit scratched but your mother, well..."

"What about her...? " asked Grizz, fear in his innocent eyes.

"... I'm so sorry, but she didn't survive..."

After that statement, nobody talked again for a few minutes. The nurse held her head up to Grizz, fearing a violent reaction, but what she saw sent shivers down her spine. The young boy didn't have any expression on his features. His face was totally blank, as if he was dead. In a deep shock state, Grizz couldn't think, couldn't feel anything. He just stared into nothing as if any life he had in him had just disappeard the moment the nurse said his mother was dead.

He didn't understand. Couldn't understand what she had just said. His mother was... _dead_? No that's not possible. He was laughing with her, singing with her just a moment ago... _wait._ Two days since the accident? Just how long had he been unconscious? He couldn't care less right now. He had to go see his mother, let her know he's fine and be sure she's safe.

Grizz got out of bed, his blank and pale face still lifeless. This time he didn't collapse on the floor, he didn't care if he was in pain, he had to get to her. He heard the nurse calling his name in the background but he limped to the hallway. Holding himself on the walls, Grizz walked a few meters on shaky legs and suddenly stumbled upon his father.

Lifting his head up, he faintly called out to his old man.

"Dad..."

"You killed her. She died because you, you monster ! " he yelled.

Grizz's heart was bumping through his chest as his vision blurred and he collapsed on the ground. He heard people rushing towards him, his father screaming at him, nurses yelling.

_She's dead..._

 


	3. The Beginning

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Grizz has a little talk with his father.

_She’s dead…_

Grizz couldn’t take this fateful fact out of his mind. It now had been a couple of weeks since their accident. Ellen Visser had been buried by a rainy day, no one crying for her except for the young wounded boy. Grizz was now back home, back to their everyday life but something was missing from him. As if his mother had taken this little raging light inside of him with her when she died. As if nothing was even worth living now that she was gone.

But Grizz wouldn’t give up his life and joy because of her, " _T_ _hat’s not what she would have wanted for me_ ", he told himself.

She was so full of brillance and love, she was just like a sun, warm and kind, bright and beautiful. He couldn’t just stay in this darkness ; whenever he thought of her, he felt like betraying her by behaving like that. So he returned to school, saw his friends again, laughed and smiled again. Even if he always felt some kind of void on the late night, this life would have been almost sufficient for him. If it wasn’t for Logan.

Logan Visser was a great dad. Okay, sometimes he went a little too far when he was alone with a bottle of whiskey but he loved his wife and child. She was the pride of his life and Gareth was… well, here. He never wanted children but Ellen was so thrilled being pregnant that he ultimately agreed to keep the child. Only later did he understand that this little thing would take all their energy and that he would monopolize his dear wife to a point that she wouldn’t have anytime left for him. He sometimes lashed out on the kid because of it but seeing Ellen so happy and delighted, he never thought too much about it.

But now she was gone. Because of _him_. Because he took her away from his loving arms. And everybody was just acting as if this child was such a sad victim, not giving a shit that he was suffering too ! The love of his life, his whole heart, gone, forever ! Because of him !

The first time it happened, Grizz was coming home from school as usual but he could sense that something wasn’t right.

" Dad ? Are you home already ? " he asked, searching from the kitchen to the living room.

There was his father, drunk as a skunk, facing the window watching the little kids walking home innocently.

" You did this. " he whispered.

" Did what, dad ? Are you okay ? Do you want me to get you something…? " Grizz said, sensing already the menacing aura emitting from his father.

" You did _this_ to me ! " he yelled, showing the whiskey bottle dancing between his fingers. " You made my life so miserable ! You should never have been born, Ellen would still be there, with me! But now what huh?! I’m stuck here, with you, you fucking monster ! Am I supposed to love you ? To care for you ? Who would ever care for a murderer like you ! "

Grizz stood there for a moment, frozen by his dad’s words. He knew that he could sometimes say hurtful things when he was feeling sad or when he was drunk but that never happened before… not to this extent.

Sensing his father strong feelings, Grizz couldn’t shake out from his mind that what he just heard was his dad’s real thoughts and not only a raw drunk anger. He felt so sad, so betrayed, to be rejected like that by his own father at such a time.

" I’m so sorry it happened dad… I’m sorry you feel this way about me, I’m sorry I took mum from you. I…" he mumbled, half sobbing.

He didn’t want to upset his father anymore and he himself took the blame for what happened. If he didn’t have a fight with his father on his birthday and if they didn’t go to the movie, then his mother wouldn’t be dead. But he was only eight years old, there is just so much a young boy can comprehend or understand and his father’s feeling towards his birth was something that just didn’t make sense to him. Why was he born if his father didn’t want kids ? Or was it because it’s _him_ ? Because of who he is and how he behaves ?

" I’m sorry if I did something to upset you dad, I …"

" Upset me ? Upset me ?! Your very existence is upsetting me Gareth ! If only you had died instead of her…"

That was more than Grizz could take, with tears in his eyes and pain in the heart, he just turned around whispering a faint " _Sorry._.." before leaving the room.

" Owh, you think you can just walk away on me like that ?! You better come back here Gareth ! "

But he couldn’t listen to this anymore, he ran out of the room and headed straight to his bedroom, shutting the door behind him. He was afraid. Scared of his own dad. But Grizz could sense so much hate coming from his father that he really didn’t know what the man was capable of right now. Logan didn’t have anything to lose anymore, so he became suddenly a very dangerous man. Knowing he held him responsible for his mother’s death, Grizz couldn’t stop his hands from shaking and his eyes from crying.

He heard yelling and glass breaking coming from downstairs and curled further in his bed, trying to block his father’s feelings from flowing through him. Suddenly, there was a loud sound and the door broke open, revealing a very drunk and frightening Logan. Grizz tried to hide himself between his sheets but there was nothing he could do to prevent what was coming for him.

Logan grabbed him by the ankle and dragged him out of bed on the cold floor. Grizz screamed to let him go. Never before did he feel as scared as he was at this very moment. Yelling nonsense and insulting him, Logan picked the boy from the ground and held him by the shirt.

" Never again walk away on me like that, you little shit ! You think you’re better than me, is that it huh ?! Well, I’m gonna show you who’s in command here ! " yelled Logan

" Dad, please stop ! Please, I’m sorry I won’t do it again, I promise, I won’t do it ! Juste please…" he begged.

But before he could even finish his sentence, Grizz felt a sharp pain shooting through his left cheek. He stumbled on the floor, touching his face, eyes wide open in shock. Did his dad just punch him ?

The eight years old was trying to process everything that was happening but then his father grabbed him again by the collar, punching him a second time on the floor. He felt blood coming from his nose but he didn’t have time for that, Logan had decided that punches won’t be enough so he began kicking his son in the guts.

He lashed out like that for a few minutes before calming down, grabbing his bottle and heading downstairs, leaving a very beaten and bloody Grizz on the floor. Grizz tried to compose himself and to straighten up in a seated position but his injuries from the accident were still fresh and his bruised ribs now screamed from the kicking. He stayed there on the floor the whole night, crying himself to sleep.

"  _What have I done to deserve that? What did I do? Did I really kill her ? Did I really make my father an alcoholic bastard ? What should I do? What should I do… ? Please, mum, anyone, help me ! Help me…_  "

Little did he know that this, was only the beginning.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Luke coming in next chapter, so be prepared ;)  
> Don't worry, even if Grizz is in a bad place right now, Luke is just too kind, I won't turn into a bad guy :)))))
> 
> Enjoy !


	4. Aftermath

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Things go down pretty fast but there's always hope.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello everyone, just this little note to warn you that we're gonna stay in Grizz's childhood for like ten chapter more before entering the timeline of the show so if you find it too long, just let me know :)
> 
> Enjoy !

Everything hurt.

After giving in to a few hours of restless sleep, Grizz could feel his whole body aching. His face was still red from the punches and his ribs were on fire. But what hurt the most was this undefinable hatred his father had thrown at him the night before. What the hell did he do to deserve such hatred ? He knew he was held responsible for the death of his mother, but what could he have done ? He’s just a kid… not some kind of fucking superhero. He did everything he could to keep her safe and even if it wasn’t enough at the end, did he really deserve such treatment ?

Debating on weither to stay like that, curled up on the floor or to just get up and go to school as if nothing had happened. He tried to determine if his father was still somewhere near or if he just collapsed on the couch after beating his son. Hearing nothing but the few cars passing outside, he decided that he would be in even more trouble if he had to explain why he didn’t come to school for the whole day and began changing. As he headed to the bathroom, he took in the state of his face and body. His left cheek was slightly bruised and his nose had stopped bleeding but he did see a beautiful black eye starting to form. His side was red and blue, which was no great sign but he would have to do with it for the day.

When he walked downstairs in the quietest way possible with bruised ribs, he discovered his dad passed out on the couch, his beloved whiskey bottle still in his hands. Grizz decided it was best to just let him be, knowing that a hangover Logan was as much a threat as a drunk one.

The young boy made his way to school, where he found Luke and the others talking about their previous night. Not feeling comfortable sharing his recent argument with his father, he just went straight to the classroom, just waving at his friends. The day went quietly, nothing out of ordinary ; Luke being his funny laughing self, Jason grinning on the background, talking about his love for dogs with Clark who just didn’t give two shits. A very normal day, but Grizz just couldn’t get over what had happened the night before and was starting to think about talking to Luke about it during the weekend.

When he came home after school, he wasn’t prepared for what was waiting for him. A very pissed and scary Logan still on the familial couch, drinking his head off.

 _"No please, not again..."_  did he tell himself. He didn’t have the strength to put out with this shit for a second day so he just walked straight up to his room. Unfortunately, his father had already spotted the young boy and called for him before he could escape.

" Hey kid ! Where are you going like that, you impolite bastard, come back here ! "

Grizz took a few steps back, just enough to take the poor state of his violent father.

" Hi dad, how was your day…? " he said shyly.

" Well, it didn’t go very well because someone didn’t even care to wake me up this morning. Because of that I was late at work and my boss was pissed at me. " Logan stared straight through Grizz’s green eyes.

" And you know how I hate being late at work don’t you, _Gareth_ ? "

" Yes I know, I’m sorry not to have waken you up this morning, I thought you could use some more sleep… "

" Owh, you thought I could use some more sleep, how kind of you ! " he said, irony written all over his contorted face.

" Well, in fact, I thought that yesterday I had made myself clear as who’s in charge here… But I suppose you didn’t learn your lesson, Gareth. "

Grizz’s blood ran cold as his father’s stare shot right through his young heart.

" I’m sorry dad, I didn’t mean to be dismissive or anything, I really understood yesterday… I don’t think there’s any need to… "

" Oh gosh, don’t you ever shut the fuck up ?! I don’t care what you think, you little piece of shit. And don’t ever call me dad…! You’re no son of mine. "

" But dad, please…" he begged.

" I said shut up ! " and with that he lashed out at his shocked son.

This time, the bastard didn’t even start soft with some punches, he directly exploded his now empty whiskey bottle in his son’s side. Not giving two shits about the sharp scream escaping Grizz’s mouth. Logan then kicked him as he did the day before but this time with more confidence and even more hatred. Throwing all sorts of things at his sobbing and shaking son, he just liked the scared look on the boy’s features. But every time he tried to look at him in the eyes, the latter just reminded him of his beautiful dead wife.

" She’s _dead_ because of you, because you exist ! How dare you ressemble her ?! How dare you still live, you piece of garbage ! " he yelled.

Grizz tried to hold on the best he could but ultimately gave in and passed out on the floor. When the dark began to surround him, he didn’t know what was the worst; the physical or emotional pain.

He regained consciousness in the evening and immediately started panicking ; "  _Is he just waiting for me to wake up before beating me again ? Is he still here ? Did he just abandon me here ? Is he ever coming back to get me ? Did he throw me away ?_  " But as the last question came up in his tortured mind, he heard bedsheets shifting upstairs. "  _Oh god, he just went to sleep, what the hell am I thinking…?_  "

As he was about to head upstairs to find refuge in his own bed, he heard his dad call for him.

" Gareth ? Is that you ? Are you finally awake, you bastard?! "

Grizz stood there, petrified, not daring to make any sound. If he went upstairs right now, he would just be beaten up a second time for the night. As fear sized him abruptly, he grabbed his school bag, his shoes and ran outside. He didn’t care if his dad had heard him or if he was to drunk to distinguish anything right now but he couldn’t go back. His self preservation instincts kicking in, he just sprinted straight to his best friend’s house.

When he came across the beautiful garden of Luke’s house, he called for his friend.

" Grizz ? Why the fuck are you yelling in my garden at 7 pm, dude ? " Taking in his best friend appearance and sad expression, he suddenly felt really protective over the young boy.

" Geez, Grizz ! Are you okay ? Are you hurt ? Come inside ! "

A few seconds later, the front door opened and a panicked Luke bursted out.

" Dude, I’m sorry to show up like that but I kinda had an argument with my father, can you let me crash the night please…? "

" Yes of course, Grizz. Of course ! I’ll just get my parents, wait for…"

" No ! Your parents can’t know I’m here, they would just call my father and I really need to be away from him right now… "

" Okay, okay, buddy… Well, I’ll come up with something to my parents, just go to my room and wait for me, you’ll explain everything later. "

" Thanks Luke. "

Luke entered first to be sure no one would see his friend going upstairs and told his parents he was not feeling well and that he would go to sleep early.

" So… wanna tell me what happened, dude ? " he said, entering his bedroom.

Grizz just laid on the bed, waiting for his friend to return.

" Well, yesterday when I came back home after school, my father was drunk and started saying bullshit about how he never wanted to have me and that I was the one to kill my mother. He went on and… "

" Wait, _what_ ?! He said that you killed your mother ?! What the fuck, man ?! "

" Yeah I know it’s pretty fucked up, even if he’s not totally wrong… Well, either way, I couldn’t take any more of it so I went straight to my room and he didn’t really liked that. So he followed me upstairs and started punching me and kicking me in the guts. "

" He _punched_ you ?! What’s wrong with him, dude ?! How could you go back home today after school, you should have told me ! "

" I thought it would be just a one time thing, you know. Like a very bad day but, well, everybody has them, right ? Anyway, when I came home after school today, he was waiting for me and gave me another beating. I passed out and when I woke up, I was just too afraid to stay at the house so I came here. I’m so sorry to make you lie to your parents and everything, I just… "

" Grizz. It’s fine, it’s better for you to be here tonight than at home, being beaten up by some fucking sick bastard. I don’t know what we can do for the weekend, but you stay here tonight and we'll figure something out tomorrow, okay ? " Luke said, with his overflowing warmth.

" Yeah, okay, thank you, Luke. " said Grizz, tears slowly forming in his tired eyes.

" Hey buddy... look at me. Everything’s gonna be fine, okay ? Don’t listen to your dad, I’m glad you're here and I know that what happened to your mother wasn’t your fault, so stop blaming yourself, alright ? I don’t know exactly what he told you but none of it was true, believe me. I’m here for you, okay ? "

" Thank you, Luke. Thank you…" he mumbled before completely giving in to his tears. Grizz sobbed for a long time, held by Luke’s tiny arms.

When he fell asleep, he really was feeling better. " _Everything’s gonna be alright, Luke’s here. Everything is gonna be fine…"_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Luke's just an angel, he cares so much for his buddy. (But no shipping Luke/Grizz for the present time, sorry hahahah)
> 
> Love them both !
> 
> Hope you enjoy :)


	5. Hope

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Things settle down a bit, Grizz is not alone.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know this story can seem really depressing and sad (and it is) but I hope this chapter will be a little bit lighter :)
> 
> Hope you enjoy this as much as I do !
> 
> See you !

Despite his general state, Grizz had the most restful sleep he had had in ages. When he woke up, a slight early breeze was passing through the curtains of Luke’s large quiet bedroom. Grizz took a moment to appreciate the general peaceful atmosphere emerging from his friend’s bedroom before slowly opening his tired green eyes.

He was only slightly surprised to see that Luke was nowhere to be seen. It was a quiet Saturday morning and he had no doubt that his friend had already plans for the weekend. He gently got up from his bed to prepare for the day when a sharp pain sized his bruised ribs. " _Oh yeah, I forgot about this…"_  did he think, slowly massaging his side. The door opened gently and his best friend’s smiling face appeared from the hallway.

" Hey, buddy ! Slept well ? " Luke said, with a large grin on his face.

" Yeah, thanks ! It’s good to finally be able to rest for a bit. Any plans for the day? "

" Well, nothing out of the ordinary, I have to meet with Jason and Clark on the field this afternoon but what about you ? Are you already going back home ? " Luke said, worry written all over his gentle features.

" I really don't want to go home but I didn’t take my medication yesterday night and you clearly don’t wanna handle a passed out Grizz on the field today. "

" What ?! You didn’t take your meds ? Are you okay, does it hurt somewhere ? Do I have to bring you to the hospital ?! " Luke panicked.

" Hey dude, calm down, I’m fine. Those meds are only useful to stabilize my heartbeat if I have to do physical efforts. As long as I don’t start running all over the place, I’m fine. "

" Oh… okay, if you say so, bud. Do you want me to come along so that you won’t be alone with your father…? " asked the young boy, a mix of worry and anger in his voice.

" Well, I’m not really thrilled to face him again but I prefer doing it alone… No offense but I wouldn’t bear him hurting you too. "

" I don’t care if he tries to hurt me Grizz, you have to be safe and I’m not letting you go alone if there’s even a chance of him laying his hand on you. " said an agitated Luke.

" Luke, please, just… let me do this. It’s already hard enough to be rejected and beaten up by my own father without having to worry if his gonna turn his anger on my friend. I promise I’ll be careful not to upset him and if anything happens I’ll just run straight to you, alright? "

" Okay… but I warn you, if I don’t hear from you before this afternoon, I’ll call the cops. " warned Luke.

" Fine, but I have a check-up appointment at the hospital this afternoon so I may be unable to contact you before the evening. Just don’t freak out, okay ? "

" I won’t freak out, I promise. "

" Great, thanks Luke. " said Grizz, while finishing changing. " I’ll just join you on the field when I come out of the hospital and you can teach me a thing or two about your barbarian game. " he said, with a smile on his laughing face.

" Well, first, it’s not a barbarian game ! It’s very tactical and for gentlemen only. Don’t you like football ? I thought that maybe, when your heart will be fine, you could join the team. "

" My heart won’t ever be fine, Luke, you know it. But it’s sweet anyway. It’s not that I don’t like football, I really wish I could play with you guys, it’s just… You know, I always dreamt of taking dance classes so I guess I just never really could get into your sport. "

" Why haven’t you ever tried taking dance lessons if you like it so much ? " asked an intrigued Luke.

" My mum had promised she would sign me up but it was just before… you know… " Grizz whispered the end of the sentence, sadness showing in his eyes.

" Oh…sorry dude. Well, couldn’t you ask for your father to register you after the accident ? "

" No way, he never wanted me to take those lessons to begin with so I guess I’ll just try to understand the rules of football for the moment. I don’t think my heart could take all the roughness on the field anyway. "

" Man, you have to ask him to let you take the dance classes. Tell him that’s what your mother would have wanted. You clearly have a thing for that dance thing so fight for it. "

" And get beaten up because I talked about my mum, no thanks. " retorted Grizz.

" Okay, whatever dude. Just think about it. " said Luke, playfulness all over his features.

" Will do. " laughed the young boy.

It was already late in the morning when Grizz got out of Luke’s house. He felt much better now and was ready to face his father. He decided Luke was right and that there was no real reason for his dad to refuse him those dance lessons. They were free and took place at school, he wouldn’t even have to come get him after practice. So he walked home, eyes full of hope and innocence.

When he got home, he was relieved to see his dad had calmed down and that he was quietly working in his office.

" Hey dad, I’m home ! " said Grizz, pretending nothing had ever happened the night before.

" Morning, Gareth. I’m working right now, I left you breakfast on the kitchen. Do you need me to take you to the hospital later ? You have a check-up appointment, right ? " said Logan, a small caring smile on his face.

" Huh… " Grizz was just stunned of the sudden gentle father that was now in front of him. He didn’t understand how his mood could just swing like that, but he was not gonna complain about it. He was thrilled that his father was back to his normal caring self.

" Thanks but it’s fine, I’ll just take the bus, it’s not far. Dad… I wanted to talk to you about something…" he hesitated.

" Yes, kid? "

" Well, you remember the dancing lessons, mum and I were always talking about…? I was thinking I could finally sign up for classes even now that she’s gone. I think that she would have loved that I …"

 _" Gareth_. I was having a great morning. Everything was just fine, but you _had_ to come here and talk about Ellen, didn’t you ? I forbid you to ever talk about her or any fucking dance lessons anymore, have I made myself clear ?! " Logan said coldly, anger beginning to kick in.

" Yes… Yes dad, I understand. " whispered Grizz, feeling the tears building up.

" I’m sorry I brought it up, I won’t do it again. I have to go to the hospital, see you later. " he tried to ease the mood.

" Yeah, see you. " Logan replied, not paying attention to his son anymore.

 _"Well, at least, I didn’t get beaten up this time… it’s a start. Better be safe than taking dance classes._  " he thought. Grizz took his medication before heading out to the hospital. But before leaving the house, he asked his father a last thing.

" Dad ? Could I sleep at Luke’s this weekend…? " That was a risky attempt but he really didn’t want to stay alone with his dad for too long seeing how fast his mood could switch.

" Yeah, whatever. " he replied, without even looking up from his laptop.

With that, Grizz went to take the bus to the hospital. When he arrived, he wasn’t feeling very well. The headache he was feeling since the morning was getting worse and was really starting to hurt a lot. "  _I’ll feel better once this freaking hospital appointment is done._  " he thought.

It took him about an hour to get all the medical examination, physical exercises and blood tests done and when it was finally over, he really felt like crap. Walking to the nearest bus station, he soon understood that he wouldn’t make it back alone without fainting so he called Luke.

" Hey Luke. " he greeted.

" Hey dude, are you okay ? Did your father do anything to you ?! " said Luke, starting to get himself worked up.

" No, no, everything’s fine with my dad. It’s just… I’m coming out of the hospital but I really don’t feel well. Could you come and walk home with me? I’m really sorry… " he said faintly.

" Oh gosh, alright ! Guys ! We’re gonna pick up Grizz from his appointment at the hospital, come on ! We’ll be there in, like, ten minutes buddy, just hang in there, don’t faint before we get here, okay ? " Luke said, with a reassuring voice.

" Yeah, thanks man. See you in a bit. "

" See you ! No ! Jason, just stop chasing after the stupid dog ! Bye Grizz ! " and with that he hang up.

Grizz was really starting to feel light-headed but he was grateful to have such good friends. " _They’re the best._  " he thought.

They made it in a time record and found a very dizzy Grizz waiting for them at the front of the hospital.

" Geez, you’re really pale Grizz ! I can’t believe they let you out of the hospital looking like shit ! "

" Thanks Clark, I really feel better knowing I look like shit. " Grizz said, half smiling to his friends.

" Come on man, you gotta lie down or you’re gonna pass out on us. " and with that, Luke helped his friend to the nearest bench.

They stayed like that for a few minutes, talking about their afternoon on the field and about their plans for Sunday before Grizz talked again.

" Hey Luke, you know, I asked my dad about the dance lessons we talked about this morning. But he didn’t even wanted to hear about it so I guess I’ll just join you guys on the field to learn at least the rules. " he said, a little bit sad.

" No shit man, don’t worry about it. We’ll just have to tell your dad that you came with us on the field so that you can sneak into dance lessons ! "

" Really ?! Oh thanks guys ! I don’t know what I would do without you ! " said Grizz.

He was so happy about it that all his friends could only smile at the reaction.

" You’re right, I don’t know what you would do without us, man ! Don’t worry, we got you. " Clark laughed.

" Oh by the way, can I crash at your place again Luke ? My dad agreed to let me sleep at your house for the weekend. " said Grizz.

" Oh yeah a sleepover ! I like that, and we can play video games till late at night ! " exclaimed Jason.

" All right, all right, I’ll ask my parents but first, do you have to go back home before coming to my place, Grizz ? Do you have your meds and all the shit ? " Luke asked

" Yeah, all packed for the night ! " he replied.

" Then let’s go guys ! "

They spent the night laughing and playing at Luke’s house and Grizz felt as if everything was back to the way it was before everything happened. Before his mother died, before his father started hitting him.

Everything felt so normal, so usual, that, just for the night, he forgot all about his problems. But they surely didn’t forget about him.


	6. Backfire

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Two years after everything, Grizz finally have a normal life again. But darkness always finds its way back.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Back into depressing chapters, sorry !

It now had been two years since Grizz had started sneaking into dance classes and he was really grateful that his father hadn’t discovered it yet. Logan had his ups and downs and could sometimes still get really violent but his hatred for his son had substantially subdued over the years. Grizz would still sometimes find shelter at Luke’s house but it was becoming less and less frequent, much to Grizz’s delight.

Everything was going well for him, he spent most of his time with his friends or at dance practice and his father had even encouraged him to start taking violin lessons. It really seemed Logan deeply cared about him, as if making up for the violent episodes he could still sometimes put his son through. Grizz welcomed gracefully this kindness and did everything he could to make his father proud.

His heart was also improving a bit through the years, which allowed him to get more and more involved in dance classes. On good days, he even joined his friends on the field, delighting Luke to the point.

Grizz often thought about his mother but he always would remember happy times and warm memories. His mother was not this tortured and taboo subject anymore, he finally could think about her without feeling tears rolling down his cheeks even if he sometimes still felt so lonely without her. The worst times were his birthdays. He hated it, everybody was so happy to celebrate and to congratulate him that they all forgot that it was also the day he lost her. Logan, on the other hand, never forgot and didn’t fail on reminding him about his responsibility in his mother’s death. Those were the days he felt the most miserable, but he never let it out, not to worry Luke and his friends.

Grizz was feeling that his strange ability to take in everybody’s emotions was getting stronger by the day. It was not much of a problem as long as he never touched an emotionally unstable person. He could always feel the waves of emotions flowing through him but whenever he made contact with such people, it was as if opening a gate to the other’s raw emotions. It could sometimes grow unbearable but he always managed to run away in time before anyone discovered his little secret. He thought about talking to Luke about it but it wasn’t much of a problem and he didn’t want to worry his friend any more than he already was.

Walking home one day from his hospital appointment, Grizz was about to greet his dad when he sensed a flow of angry and upset emotions penetrate him. He stopped dead in the hallway, feeling his anxiety rising. " _Oh no… Not another bad day…_ " he thought, before looking for his father.

He found the latter in his office, setting fire to all his professional files.

"What the ! What are you doing, dad ?! " Grizz yelled, running to the kitchen to get water to ease the starting fire. " What’s going on ?! Did something happen ?" he inquired.

His father turned to him, laughing like a madman. The ten years old felt something break in his father, violent emotions hitting him as if someone had suddenly punched him.

"Dad, calm down, please. I don’t know what happened but I’m sure it’s not worth setting the whole house on fire…" pleaded Grizz.

"Oh shut up, annoying brat ! How could you understand anyway, huh ? Your world’s just full of rainbows and butterflies, you wouldn’t understand, it’s adults matters." the man answered.

"Try me. " he retorted.

"Fine ! I got fired ! My fucking boss threw me out the door ! So what now, you’re gonna lecture me about the irresponsible father that I am ? You ignorant bastard ! " and with that, he pushed his son to the ground and started kicking him.

" _Bear with it. Don’t cry. Don’t cry..._ " Grizz thought.

He now knew exactly how to behave when his father was having one of his episodes. Just bear with it, say nothing and wait for him to calm down on his own. But he felt that this day was more than just a bad day.

His father didn’t have a job anymore… How were they gonna live without him working ? Without any money ? Would his dad begin to drink again ? Was he gonna get beaten up four night a week again ? No, he didn’t want that !

"Dad, please stop punching me…! It’s gonna be fine, we’re gonna work something out. Just please, stop it ! " he sobbed.

But Logan was nowhere near finished with him and lashed out on his son the whole evening. Only when he couldn’t hear him sobbing and mumbling none-sense anymore did he stop. He went to the kitchen to get his favorite whiskey bottle out.

" _It hurts. It hurts. It hurts !_ " was all that was Grizz could think about. Between his father’s blows, his own misery and all the negative hateful emotions coming from his father straight through his heart, he just couldn’t take it.

He waited for his father to get out of the room before even trying to move. Well, even if he tried, his shocked state wouldn’t let him move a muscle. He resigned himself to just lay there on the floor for a moment, trying to get himself together. After what felt like hours, Grizz finally managed to get into a seated position so that he could get his phone in his school bag. Dialing Luke’s number like so many times before, the kid began sobbing frenetically.

"Oy, Grizz, what’s up, man ? " greeted Luke.

But Grizz couldn’t say a word. He wanted to speak, to call for his friend to help but he was crying so hard that no sound came out of his mouth except for some pained groans.

"Grizz ? What’s going on ? Are you okay? " Luke worried.

He knew that Logan was less and less violent with his son but he had never heard someone cry so painfully before. Anxiety building in him, he feared for the worst.

"Lu… Luke, could…could you co…come and get m..me please…? " whimpered a very shaking Grizz.

"O…Of course ! I’ll be there in less than five minutes, just wait for me ! " he almost shouted the last part.

On his way to his best friend’s house, Luke couldn’t shake this awful feeling that something really bad happened to his friend. He was so angry at this Logan bastard and at himself for not doing anything to prevent something to ever happen again. " _I really am the worst friend ever !_ " he thought.

He could have stopped that, he could have told someone, his parents, the police, anyone ! But Grizz had already lost so much, he didn’t know how much his friend would be able to take before totally breaking and taking his father away was not the best alternative for him to recover from his past trauma. " _Well, look what happened now ! You dumbass ! Grizz is hurt, again !_ " Luke made himself a promise not to ever let his friend be hurt in anyway, not under his watch !

When he arrived at the Visser’s, Luke almost cried seeing the trembling sobbing Grizz waiting for him curled up at the garden entrance. His friend’s condition was much worse than what he anticipated and he wasn’t sure that Grizz could make it to his house without fainting. He was covered in purple bruises and blood flew freely from his right brow down his beautiful green eyes, now red from tears and exhaustion. The young boy looked about to faint anytime and seemed unable to say anything.

"Grizz… Oh my god, Grizz. You can’t be here anymore, I’m gonna get you out of this living hell. But first, this bastard is gonna pay for doing this to you ! " he said, rage in his eyes.

But as he was heading for the front door, a small shivering hand faintly grabbed his shirt.

"No… no pl..please Luke. I just wanna g..get out of here, please…" whispered Grizz, now freely crying again.

"Please… get m..me out of here…" he begged his friend.

Luke felt tears building in his eyes. How could anyone hurt a caring, loving and selfless boy such as Grizz ? He was the most generous and gentle person he had ever met and yet this fucking bastard dared lay a hand on him ?! As much as he wanted to punch the man right now, he knew his friend needed him. He wouldn’t be as selfish as to leave Grizz alone at a time like this. So Luke helped Grizz on his feet and took him back home. The young man cried himself to sleep after mumbling " I’m sorry… I’m so sorry " for like the thousandth time.

Once Grizz was finally asleep, all of Luke’s thought were redirected toward Logan Visser.

" _You’re gonna pay for doing this to him… I swear, one day, I’m gonna make you pay_." Luke sweared to himself.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> With an unemployed and depressed Logan, dark times are coming...


	7. Luke

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Grizz talks with Luke about his situation, but it doesn't go as planned.

" _I have to do something. There must be something I can do… Gosh, I don't know, Grizz is usually the smart one, not me ! What should I do?_ "

Luke couldn't get any sleep that night. Grizz seemed more at ease but Luke wasn't able to calm down for the whole night. He was so full of rage and yet so sad his best friend had to go through all that. He had to think of something, there was no way he was letting Grizz go back to this sick asshole. He thought about telling the police but then he remembered that if the boy was separated from his father, he would just be taken away to a freaking perverted foster family. He'd seen enough TV series to know that foster care was full of creepy old women and perverse men. " _Well, is it better here ? Not so sure…_ "

Luke's thoughts were interrupted by a waking Grizz. He slowly opened his eyes to see Luke seated in front of his bed, looking probably even more terrible than he was.

"Luke ? Are you okay? You don't look so good…" asked Grizz, half yawning.

"Well, I didn't get much sleep last night, but don't worry about me, how are _you_ feeling?"

"To be honest, I feel like crap. Could use some more sleep but I really should go home to take my meds."

"No. You're not going." snapped Luke.

"Excuse me? Dude, what are you talking about?" Grizz asked, really surprised by his friend's bossy side.

"You're not going home. Your father's still there." said Luke, sulking.

"I know he's still there, where else would he be? Look, I really appreciate you coming for me last night, but I really should…"

"I'm _not_ letting you see him on your own ! It's out of question. Either I'm coming with you, either you let me go to your house to get your medication."

"Luke…"

"And as you're not really in any condition to go running all around town, then the second option it is." Luke said, getting up and heading to the door.

"Luke." Grizz tried.

"You can shower while I'm gone if you want, the towels are in the…"

"Luke !" Having finally caught his attention, Grizz tried to understand his friend's reaction. "What the hell are you talking about, man? I have to go home, I can't just run away like that and never return. I'm sorry you had to see me like that yesterday and thank you for taking care of me but I really should go home before my dad sees I'm gone and begins to worry."

A laugh escaped Luke's mouth. When he turned back to Grizz, he had a strange expression on his face.

"Anything funny, dude?" asked Grizz, intrigued.

"You are, Grizz. Ridiculously funny ! Are you really thinking about not worrying your dad right now ?! Are you fucking serious, man?!"

"What…?"

"He hits you, Grizz ! Your bastard of a father beats the shit out of you and you're here wondering about him worrying over you ?! Who the fuck are you kidding, dude ?! He doesn't give a shit about you ! Don't think I've not seen all the bruises and burns you got on your back, Grizz ! You can't go on like that, pretending everything is fine !" Luke shouted out.

"I…" he didn't know what to say. Those words hurt. But he knew it was the truth and that his friend was just worried about him.

"Don't you dare say I'm wrong, cause you know I'm not. Ever since your mother died he's been out of control ! I understand that you don't want to lose him too but you can't stay in this situation, always wondering if tonight's gonna be a movie or a beating. You have to get out of there ! You can stay at my house if you want, I could talk to my parents about your father and…"

"No !" yelled Grizz. "You absolutely can't tell them anything ! I know you despise my father and that you're worried about me but I still love him and I don't wanna have to go. Do you think I enjoy being in this shitty situation ?! Well, great news, Luke, I hate it ! It makes me sick and I hate being a burden to you, but what choice do I have ?! I prefer getting beaten up from time to time than having to go away from you, from the guys, away from my mother, to a fucking foster family."

"Well, do what you want then, Grizz ! But don't call me, next time your sick father uses you as a punching-ball ! You know, I've always been there for you ! But I don't care anymore ! I, at least, have a family that's still alive and that loves and wants me !" Luke screamed.

"…" Grizz was at a loss of words. He just stared at Luke, tearful wide eyes looking at his friend. He couldn't believe what Luke had just said, how hurt he felt right now. His best friend, confident and personal hero was also rejecting him. How did it come to that…?

Seing his friend's eyes wide in shock, Luke reflected on what he had just said. " _What the fuck did I just say…? Did I really tell him that_ ?"

"Grizz…I'm so…"

"No. It's fine, Luke. At least now I know how you feel. Sorry to have bothered you and your living family." Grizz said coldly.

And with that, he grabbed his stuff and took his leave. Luke was still processing what had just happened, how badly he must have hurt his best friend. He heard the door slam.

  
Grizz couldn't think, he was just feeling this huge pain in his chest. He never thought words only could hurt so much. Crying on his way home, he didn't care that his fragile heart was roughly beating through his chest and when he finally made it home, went straight to his room. He didn't even think of his father, his head was full of Luke's hurtful words. He took his meds and curled up on his bed.

  
The door half-opened and Logan's features came into view. With a threatening calm he said.

"Dare to explain to me who this Sam kid is and what are those dance lessons he was talking about, _Gareth_ ?"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oh ! Sam's finally here ! They're still young so there won't be any romance FOR NOW, but do not fear, time passes so fast in the fanfiction world ;)
> 
> Hope you enjoyed this chapter !
> 
> See you !


	8. Healing

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Grizz finally tries to stand against his father.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A bit more of Grizz/Sam in this chapter, and a great discovery !  
>  Hope you enjoy :)

"Dare to explain to me who this Sam kid is and what are those dance lessons he was talking about, _Gareth_?"

" _Sam? Why did he come to my house ? Did my father lash out at him too?_ " he thought.

"Dad, I swear, if you hurt Sam, I'm gonna…" warned Grizz.

"You're gonna what, _kid_ ? Tell me what you're gonna do against me, huh?"

"I don't care about you hitting me, but if you ever lay a hand on my friends, I swear to god dad, I won't hesitate for a second before calling the cops and tell them everything."

"Oh, tell them everything ? Well, I don't see why they would believe a word you say ! As far as I'm concerned, you're just a kid who wants attention and who would do anything to have what he wants. Including lying to the cops. Seriously, between you and me, who do you think they'll trust ?" said Logan, viciously smiling.

"Ah yeah, sorry, I forgot to tell you between your punches, but Luke has pictures of what you did to me. Every single bruise. I didn't understand why he wanted to take them so badly every time, but now I do. We agreed that if anything were to happen to me, he would gladly hand it over to the cops. So, still thinking about threatening my friends, dad?" 

"You, shitty bastard…"

"You know what ? I'm sick of that ! Right now, I really don't need you to beat the crap out of me, so just back off and let me the fuck alone." a very pissed Grizz said. He had already enough to deal with after his argument with Luke.

"Owh, so now you're having this kind of attitude, huh?! And what about the fucking dance classes, Gareth ?! I certainly remember telling you to cut the whole dancing crap." Logan said, blame in his eyes.

"Yeah, well, sorry but I really wanted to do it and there was no real fucking reason for you to punish me like that !" Grizz had lost the sudden confidence he just showed the minute before. 

"I don't care what you think about me punishing you or whatever ! You just went behind my back and took fucking dance lessons for two whole years, lying to me ! You freaking faggot !" 

"Look, I'm sorry I lied to you… I know I shouldn't have lied, but I really wanted to take those lessons and mum would have been so happy seeing me dancing…"

"Don't bring your slutty mother into this, Gareth!"

 "My what ?! You fucking asshole, you can hit me, punch me all you want, but _never_ again speak about mum that way !"

"Or what ? You're gonna hand me over the police with your eleven years old friend, right ?! Well, I know for sure that you would never do that only for your own safety  You see, I know how you care about your little friends and that you don't wanna have to go away, am I wrong?"

Grizz felt tears showing up in his wide eyes. How could he know ?! How did he know that the only thing keeping him from calling the cops were his friends?! " _Well, I'm so fucked up, now…_ " he thought.

"So. No more dance classes for you and I'll make sure that this time you really go on the field like real men do, alright?"

"Or what ? If I still sneak out to dance lessons, what are you gonna do about it ? Beat the shit out of me ? Done. Insult me and make my life a living hell ? Done !" yelled Grizz.

And with this, Logan lost his shit. He began screaming that he would never let his son become a faggot and that dance classes were for girls. He started hitting his son, as he always did.

 "You wanna dance behind my back, huh ? Then I'll just have to make you unable to do so !" he screamed. 

He then grabbed Grizz at the ankle and began punching his knee really hard. 

"How are you gonna dance with a broken leg, Gareth?" Logan grabbed the bedside lamp and suddenly there was a loud sound. Grizz screamed in pain as he brought his shaking hand to his left leg. The bastard really had broken his knee and was now heading downstairs, fully satisfied.

Grizz couldn't stop screaming. It hurt so bad, much more than any bruise he ever had. And yet he didn't pass out, wished he had, but his whole body was on fire. He felt a sharp pain in his chest and understood that he was about to have a serious heart attack.

 "Dad…dad ! My heart is..it hurts really bad, I'm gonna have a seizure !" he yelled through the house. He knew his father hated him but he was sure he didn't want him to die on him like that. 

 Logan proved the point by running upstairs, already calling the hospital. He grabbed Grizz and brought him to the car without saying another word. Grizz was still screaming because of his broken knee and began hyperventilating as he felt his heart on the verge of breaking. Black surrounded him and all he could feel anymore was his heart beating so painfully in his chest.

 

"Grizz…" whispered Luke, leaning over his friend's hospital bed. 

"Wha…Luke?" Grizz mumbled, slowly waking up. He had a bad headache and it was hard to breathe. He was plugged to multiple IV's and had a breathing mask on his nose and mouth. Recalling the previous events, he was just glad to be alive. He rarely had seizures and that one had really been a bad one.

"Grizz…Grizz I'm so sorry for…what I said to you. I'm so sorry I hurt you like that…And now you're back at the hospital because of me.."

 "Lu...Luke" It was hard to talk with this breathing mask, but he had to comfort his friend.

 "It wasn't y…your fault, I swear. My da…dad found out about m..me dancing and didn't take it so w…well." whispered Grizz, still in a strange subconscious state.

 "I had a seizure, it c..could have happened any..anytime."

 "Still, I know I hurt you badly. I shouldn't have said those words, I'm sorry…"

 "I'm fine now, do..don't worry about it, buddy." Grizz said with a pained half smile. With that, Luke broke down and cried his heart out, Grizz's hand softly stroking his hair.

 "I love you, man, I'm sorry." Luke sobbed.

 "It's alright, love you too, bud."smiled Grizz.

 The doctor came in and reajusted a few IV before explaining to Grizz that he had had a really dangerous seizure and that they had to do a surgery for his knee. When he asked about his leg, Grizz lied, telling that he had fallen down the stairs and had began panicking after that. 

 "We also discovered some bruises on your back and ribs… Where did you get those, Grizz?" At that, his eyes widened. 

 "I…I fought with a friend at school, that's all." he lied again.

 

The next week, his father didn't bother coming to visit him at the hospital but Sam did. His deaf friend was just as shiny and warm as his mother. It was revitalizing to be around him. Grizz had tried learning a few signs but still struggled a lot to form a simple sentence. But Sam was patient and kind, so he really didn't mind. It broke Grizz's heart to tell him he was quitting dance because of his father but he wouldn't risk a second leg by sneaking out again. 

 "I hope it's not because of me…" Sam half whispered, half signed.

 "No, no, you don't have anything to do with it, Sam. He was gonna learn about it one day anyway so, it's fine, don't blame yourself over that." smiled Grizz, with a fake laughing look on his face.

 "It's okay, you don't have to pretend, Grizz. Not with me. I know you're sad to quit dancing, you have the right to be hurt." Sam whispered, a warm supportive smile on his features. Grizz couldn't fight the emotions building in him. It was the first time anyone, except for Luke, had ever said this kind of thing to him.

 "Thank you, Sam. Really… thanks." he simply replied.

 Grizz hated hospitals but for once in his life, he was grateful to be there. His knee hurt like hell and his heart was slowly recovering but he didn't have to be home with his father at least. He was happy there, Luke and the guys came almost everyday after school to keep him company and Sam dropped by from times to times. During the day, he could finally get some restful sleep, compose music or even play the violin. Luke had brought all his stuff from home, when his father wasn't around, so his hospital room was like a second home now.

 When he eventually got out of the hospital, he had crutches and still had to rest a lot but otherwise, he was feeling really good. As he came home, his father had calmed down but was still laying drunk and jobless on the couch. Grizz didn't really pay attention to him and was fine with that as long as he was safe. 

 

The day he went back to school, he was delighted to see all his friends again. They had gym class, so Grizz sat on the bench by the field and watched his friends playing football.

 Everything was great until Luke was tackled to the ground and began screaming, holding his side. Grizz then limped on the field to try to attend to his friend but there was already so many people around him that he couldn't get through. All the worried emotions flew through him but he felt a strong and sharp pained feeling coming from his best friend. Pushing his way around, Grizz made it to Luke, asking for the others to just stand back and to let him breathe. 

 The crowd faded, calling a teacher for help and left Luke and his best friend alone. The quarterback was in great pain and Grizz didn't know what to do to make him feel better. He was himself overwhelmed by the ocean of feelings emitting from his friend. 

 Something clicked in Grizz's mind and he decided not to fight this wave of pained feelings anymore. He decided to embrace and accept them as his own and suddenly his hands began shining. He felt really serene about this, feeling that he wouldn't hurt his friend in any way. " _Everything is gonna be fine now…_ " he thought to himself. 

 When Grizz placed his shining hands on his throbbing side, Luke didn't know what to think anymore. " _What the fuck's going on?!_ " he thought. But gradually, he felt the pain disappear from his side. 

 After a few seconds, he was feeling really great, as if nothing had ever happened. He looked up to his friend and understood everything. Grizz had taken his pain as his own. He had transferred the pain inside Luke's body to his own with a calm and serene expression. 

 Grizz wasn't feeling so well and soon understood that the hurt his friend was previously feeling wouldn't just go away magically. He had taken it upon him and he was grateful for it. He couldn't bear to see his friend in pain. 

 "Are you okay, Grizz? How did you do that? Does it hurt a lot?" asked Luke, amazement in his eyes.

 "It hurts a bit and I'm kinda dizzy but otherwise I'm fine." answered Grizz, smiling. Himself amazed by these new powers.

 "Dude, that's so cool!" laughed Luke.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yeah ! So I added a little bit more to this "power" thing cause to me, it'll really be a reflection of each character in the future so, please tell me what you think.  
> Those powers will also impact the story later (even in the timeline of the show).
> 
> Hope you like it ! Please give me your feedback :)
> 
> See you !


	9. The Party

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sam's birthday may or may not go as planned.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> WARNING this chapter contains mention of Sexual Violence/Rape, beware.

For four years, Luke and Grizz had experimented on those strange healing powers. It seemed that Grizz was able to take the pain of other people as his own, healing completely the wound. It worked on physical and emotional pain but always left Grizz energetically drained and in a great amount of pain depending on the injury.

 Luke had confided to Grizz that he also possessed strange powers. Every time he got angry and lost his temper, objects would fly against the walls or break into a thousand pieces. He was basically afraid of this power and had never told his friend because he didn't want to scare him. They both spent a lot of time mastering their power and Luke could finally control it. He could now levitate small objects and learnt to manage his anger so that he always had control over it. 

They thought a lot about this power thing, wondering if they was the only ones to have such capacities or if everybody had them. They finally concluded that everybody had them but hid it to some point or that they weren't even aware of it. 

Grizz was so happy to be able to help his friends if they were hurt, that he sometimes managed to forget about how fucked up his life was.

 

Now fifteen, Grizz was slowly falling apart, thanks to his dad. Logan had gotten really bad and threatened him on a daily basis. He could see that his father was falling into a deep depression, always drunk and not even looking for a job anymore. But every time he tried to help him or to get him to do something, Logan just ended up beating him up. Luke told him to just let him be, even if he felt bad about it. 

His dad was going to the prostitutes almost every night by now, disrespecting his dead mother. When the girls also began to be sick of his violent self, Logan turned to his son. 

As Ellen had suspected at the time, he always had this horrible attraction for the youngest. The first time he had sexually harassed him, Grizz broke down and simply disconnected from the reality. His father was sober that night and had taken a sick pleasure in destroying Grizz's last traces of happiness. After each time came a denial stage that lasted for a short time, only to make him break down a few hours later.

He tried to deal with it, despite the nightmares and fears, so ashamed that he never told Luke. This time it was his own burden to carry. Logan had threaten to target his best friend, saying it would be worth it even if he was reported. 

"I don't care about being locked up, if I can hurt you one last time. So if you don't want your friend to take your place, you better go with it." he had told him. 

He had to protect him, even if it meant being ripped apart for the rest of his miserable life.

 

Grizz joined the football team, to avoid his father as much as possible. His heart was still a bit weak but he took heavy medication before practice, anything to prevent him from going home. Luke was delighted and Grizz couldn't bring himself to tell him the real reason he joined. His friend was already so supportive even thought he himself had private problems that he didn't feel like adding the "rape thing" to the list. 

The boys became popular thanks to the football team and were often invited to parties. Grizz never really wanted to go. He was not sure he could deal with so many emotions and people gathered together. But this time, it was Sam's birthday. His brother Campbell had organized a little party, much less for Sam than to have a reason to invite friends over. Even if it wasn't Sam's idea, Grizz was really excited to spend time with his deaf friend again. After he quit dance, they had slowly drifted apart, much to Grizz's discontent. " _Just for this time, I guess I could go. Even just to spend the evening away from dad, it's worth it._ " he thought.

 When he spotted his team at the Eliot's house, they were already surrounded by a lot of people he didn't know. He wasn't sure he wanted to go anymore… There was to many people, too many feelings pushing their ways into him. But as he was going to turn back, Jason arrived, a beer in a hand, a large grin on his face. 

"Dude ! Where are you going ? You can't already go back, you just arrived ! Come on, I'll just introduce you to the girls !"

"Huh, I'm not sure Ja…"

"Oh don't worry, they'll love you ! I know you can be shy around girls some times but it's gonna be fine ! I've got you, bro!" laughed Jason.

"O…Okay" Grizz said, already being dragged inside by his friend.

"Guys, this is Grizz ! Grizz, the beautiful ladies are Allie, Kelly, Becca, Cassandra and Gwen and as for the boys, I think you already know Sam and this is nerdy Gordie."

"H…Hi !" mumbled Grizz, already feeling shy being surrounded by so many people.

"Hey Grizz ! It's been so long, how are you ?" signed and whispered Sam.

"Great, thanks ! What about you ? Do you still take dance classes ?" smiled Grizz, delighted that his friend hadn't forgotten about him.

"Yes, I still take it ! You really should drop by sometimes, it's not the same when you're not here." giggled Sam.

"What ?! You used to take dance lessons, Grizz ?" mocked Becca. "I really wouldn't have taken you as the type who would take dance classes !"

"Yeah, well he quit anyway so it doesn't really matter anymore, right Grizz?" inquired Clark.

"I guess so…" said Grizz, half smiling.

"Why did you quit ?" asked Allie.

"Well it's complicated." he replied, smiling to her. 

"It was his father ! The bastard didn't want him to dance anymore, for no reason !" Jason suddenly said. " _Oh no…_ " Grizz thought. His father was the last thing he wanted to talk about.

"What ?! What kind of father would just tell you to quit, like that ?" said Gwen

"Yeah, that's so uncool !" Cassandra continued.

"I mean, as a father you want what's best for your child, right ?" Kelly inquired.

 Grizz was starting to be light-headed because of all the negative emotions building in the little group. He made eye contact with Luke, who understood immediately. 

"Well, he's a bastard. Can we talk about something else, now ? I'm not sure Grizz is super comfortable right now." Luke tried.

"Oh, Grizz, no reason to be upset, man. We just want to understand." Clark said.

"Hey Grizz, are you okay? You're kinda pale right now…" signed Sam.

"I…I'm not feeling really well, sorry." mumbled Grizz, feeling more and more oppressed.

"Oy, you okay bro?" asked Jason.

"You're not feeling well, Grizz?"

"What's the problem, Grizz?"

"He's not feeling well?"

Everybody suddenly turned their attention to Grizz and he hated it. " _Stop… Stop looking at me, you're making it worse._ " he thought. There was so many feelings directed towards him at the very moment that he was overwhelmed.

"Lu…Luke, can you take me outside, please ? It's too…too much right now…" he whispered to Luke, completely distressed.

"Let him breathe, I'll take him outside for a moment. We'll catch with you later !" Luke said, making his way out of the crowd with a shaking Grizz.

"It's gonna be fine, Grizz. I got you." he said.

When they finally reached the outside, there was also a lot of people in front of the house. Luke sensed that Grizz was beginning to panic and hyperventilate so he tried to find an isolated spot. When they settled far from everyone else, Luke tried to reassure his friend.

"Hey, dude. You gotta listen to my voice, okay ? It's gonna be fine, I know you're feeling overwhelmed by those feelings but you just have to accept them. It will hurt at first but you'll feel better later. I promise, it's gonna be fine." instructed Luke.

Grizz listened to his friend and took all the emotions in. It hurt a bit, but not as much as he thought. After a few minutes, all the feelings were gone and he finally could relax. His heart was beating fast in his chest and he was still hyperventilating a bit but he started calming down.

"I'm sorry, Luke. I know you were having fun…" 

"No problem, man. You looked after me when I had anger issues, that's the least I can do. You feeling better now ?" Luke asked, worried.

"Yeah I'm better, thanks. But I don't think I can go back inside with so many people for the evening."

"It's alright, I'll get your things and take you home."

"No I can walk by myself, don't worry. Just go have fun."

"Nah, I'm not letting you go home alone. You've clearly not seen your face, you're as white as a sheet. It's alright, it's not far from here, I'll just come back to the party after I drop you."

"Okay, thanks, bud."

"But, just one thing Grizz…"

"Yeah ?" he asked

"Just… don't ever let your father discover your power, alright?"

"Why are you telling me that, Luke ?" Grizz asked, surprised by his friend's request.

"Well, your power is a wonderful capacity, Grizz. And I know that you use it to help others. But I'm not sure everybody would see it that way…"

"What do you mean?"

"Some people, including your father, could try to make profit out of it. They could force you to heal some people, just for money, Grizz. Pay the price and get healed by the magical kid. And you and I both know that Logan won't give a shit about you being in pain."

"Yeah…"

"So just, promise me never to let him find out about it. I know he still hurts you more than what you tell me and it's fine if you don't wanna talk about it. But I'm worried about you, man. Just promise me you'll be really careful not to let him find out about your power…" Luke said, worry all over his warm features. Grizz was glad that he didn't push his father problem any further and that he had such a tolerant friend.

"I promise."

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Next chapter will close the childhood timeline and we'll finally be at the same time as the show.
> 
> Hope you enjoy, don't hesitate to leave a comment !
> 
> See you !


	10. Logan's final strike

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Grizz's birthday. Something terrible and irrevocable happens.

"Hey dude, planning something for your birthday ?" asked a hopeful Jason.

" _Oh yeah, I forgot it was already this time of the year…God, what excuse am I gonna give them this time?_ " Grizz thought.

"I don't know Jay. I think I'm gonna celebrate with my father." he said.

"Come on, bro ! We have to do something this year ! You always give us some bullshit excuses not to party !" inquired Clark. "But it's your birthday ! We have to do something _huge_ !"

"I'm not so sure, guys…" said Grizz.

"Well, want it or not, we're throwing you a party this time !" laughed Jason.

"Yeah, _whatever_." said Grizz, going out of the classroom with Luke.

 When they were out of hear-sight, he turned to his best friend.

"What do I have to make them listen ?! God, if I said I don't want a party, that means I _don't want_ a party ! They just wanna have fun and get wasted and that's not happening near my house, trust me !" he was getting more and more upset about this whole birthday thing. Why didn't they just listen to what he was saying ?!

"Come on, man. Don't be like that. They just want you to have fun! You're always avoiding parties, it's getting a bit suspicious…" Luke said.

"Yeah I know they're just looking after me, but I really can't, not my birthday. I promise I'll come with you to the next party but you know I don't like my birthday…"

"Well, I know they're being a little bit insensitive right now but why don't you just tell them that it reminds you too much of the day your mother died? They wouldn't bother you anymore."

"I'm already a party crasher. I don't want them to pity me anymore than they already do. I'm sick of always being the weak and depressed one!"

"But it's not your fault, Grizz! As you said, they're just looking after you, not pitying you. That's what friends are for, that's why I'm here by your side. Just let them in, Grizz."

"I don't know… They might as well throw a party if they want, let them have fun. But don't count on me to be delighted."

"That's a start. Thanks Grizz !"

"Yeah, whatever…" he answered, already smiling at his friend's joy.

" _I really don't deserve them._ " he thought. " _If they knew how tainted and disgusting I am, they wouldn't talk to me ever again…_ "

 

When he came home, Grizz was surprised to discover people going randomly in and out of his house, carrying all his stuff and furniture. 

"What the… Hey ! What the fuck are you doing ?! It's my house!" he yelled at the serious men. He spotted his father inside the house, talking with one of them. " _What the hell ?!_ "

"Dad, what's going on ? What are they doing in _our_ fucking house?!" growled Grizz.

"Gareth…I'm sorry but this is not our house anymore…"

"I'll send you all the files by the end of the week, Mister Visser. Have a good evening." the man said, before walking out of the living room.

"Wha…What are you talking about, dad?" Grizz couldn't believe it. It wasn't their house anymore ? He had sold their house ?!!

"Well… You know it's been years since I quit my job, right?" " _You mean got fired from your job…_ " Grizz thought.

"I lost a lot of money to the casino lately and…"

"You did _what_ ?! Is this how you spent your fucking days dad ?! Spending all our money at the casino ?! We need this money ! It was mum's life insurance's money !"

"Oh don't take this attitude with me, Gareth ! You have no idea what I've been going through all these years !"

"Hell yeah, I know ! You've been clear enough through your beatings ! What the hell were you thinking ?! Where are we gonna live, dad ?!"

"I…I don't know. I don't fucking know okay?! It was Ellen who took care of any financial issues! I don't fucking know what to do right now…"

"For God's sake, dad, _you're_ the adult here ! You're supposed to know what to do !"

"It's not worth it… I don't know…"

"Get yourself together ! We have to find a solution ! We're not gonna sleep under some fucking bridge ! Hey you ! Just put this fucking picture down, it was my mum's…"

"It's not worth it." Logan went on with his none-sense. He went out of the house, straight to the car.

"What ?! Dad, where are you going like that ?! We have to get our house back!" Grizz said, running to his father.

"Come with me, Gareth." said Logan with a blank face.

"What? No, we can't leave the house like that…"

"Gareth ! Get in the car. _Now._ " he responded, anger in his eyes.

"Al…alright." the boy said, getting in the passenger seat. "Where are we going…?" he asked with worry.

"Make this right. _Together_."

"Okay…" 

 

They drove for about half an hour before Logan pulled over in front of a big bridge. Grizz had no idea what his dad was doing at this moment. 

"Dad ? What are we doing here ?"

"You know, Gareth, you really should have died with her…" he whispered, locking the car.

"What…?"

"I tried, you know. I tried so hard to live without her. But now I finally understand. It's not worth it." he said, determination and sorrow in his eyes.

"Dad, I know you're still hurt by mum's death but it's gonna be fine. We're gonna figure something out, like we always did. As a family…"

"A family ? You're right. We're a _family_. We should stick together, all together."

"Yeah, that's right, we're still a family even if it's just the two of us now. We'll get through this, I promise." Grizz said, hopeful his father had finally regained his senses. 

"Now, let's just go home. We have to find a solution for the mone…"

"We're going home, Gareth. We're going home to her. I'm finally gonna see her again, and you're gonna come with me."

"What…?" 

And with that, Logan speed up, directed right to the guard rail about half a mille away. 

"What are you doing, dad ?! Stop the car ! You're going straight to the…" At that moment, Grizz realized everything.

" _He's gonna kill himself. No…he's gonna kill us both!_ " he thought, panicked.

"Dad ! Stop it ! You don't wanna do this ! Please, dad!"

"Gareth, let me do this for us. It's gonna be fine, we're going _home_. We're going to Ellen." Logan said, completely determined.

"No ! Dad ! Please, stop the fucking car ! It's not funny anymore, dad !" he said, seeing the guard rail coming closer and closer.

"Trust me, it's for the best !" yelled Logan, with a steadfast gaze.

"No ! Please stop ! I don't wanna die, dad ! I don't wanna die ! Just stop the fucking car !" Grizz screamed, trying to get out of the car. " _Fuck! It's locked!_ "

But the end of the bridge was now too close to be avoided. " _Well, that's it…_ " Grizz thought, in a terrified and panicked state. 

"NO !" was the last thing Grizz shouted before the car flew into the water.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Finally, Logan's actions backfire to him.
> 
> But will Grizz make it out, this time ?


	11. Awaking

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Aftermath of last chapter's events...

_Dark… it's dark… Am I gonna die here? Well… at least I won't have to suffer anymore…Maybe he was right. Maybe it was worth it._

But a small withering warm light began to pierce through the dark and to shine so brightly that it was hard for Grizz to take his eyes off it. It was so small and fragile at first but the more he stared at it, the brighter it shone. 

_What's this…? It's so beautiful…but so far..._ as he continued to fix it, the dark suddenly came back even stronger than before. _Well…as beautiful as it is, I don't deserve it. I'm tainted, disgusting. It's too much for me, I can't reach it, I'm not strong enough. If only I wasn't so alone…_

_Wait._

Gently, bits of soft warm and friendly features came into his mind. _Luke… I have Luke…and the guys… and Sam…_

The before weakening warm light started to grow bigger again, chasing the darkness away.

_I'm not alone…I'm not. I remember now…I…I wanna live. I wanna live !_

 

Grizz's eyes shot open and he tried to take a huge breathe, as if suffocating before. There was so much noise, much more than he could take at the moment. He tried to put his hands on his ears, to chase the noise aways, but he felt so weak. He began to take in his surroundings, he was in some sort of car…with lots of complicated stuff hanging on the sides. The few people in the car with him were working fast and had worried expressions on their face.

"Wh…Where a…m I…?" whispered Grizz faintly.

"Judith ! The boy's waking up ! Hello there, my name's Barbara and I'm here to take you to the hospital, you were involved in a car accident. You're in an ambulance right now, I know it's loud but you'll have to bear with it for now..."

"Wha…What…?" but as the word left his lips, everything came back to him. "My…my dad…Is he okay?!" he asked.

"Well, he's taken care of by another unit, right now I want you to focus on your breathing. I need you to answer a few questions if you can." Barbara asked.

"O…okay." 

"What's your name, kid?"

"Grizz. I mean…Gareth, Gareth…Visser."

"Do you have any allergy or a current medical treatment, Grizz? Anything I should know?"

"Heart con…dition…" he whispered, seeing dark circles clouding his vision. Everything was suddenly wavering and he couldn't understand what the nurse was telling him anymore.

"Grizz? Grizz! Stay with me, kid. Just listen to my voice, don't sleep. Don't sleep Grizz." 

"I..I'm sorry…" he mumbled, before giving in. 

 

Next time Grizz regained consciousness, he had a weird impression of deja-vu. But this time, he wasn't as confused as he had been after his and Ellen's car accident. He recalled everything and the first thing he thought was " _How the hell am I still alive?_ ". He remembered clearly finding no way out and the water filling the large car really fast. 

The same nurse that had taken care of him after his previous car accident came in and smiled gently at him. 

"I'm so glad, you're awake, Grizz…"

"Huh…thanks…?"

"Elizabeth. But you can call me Lizzie." she said, smiling.

"Thanks, Lizzie. What happened?" he asked. This time, for once at the hospital, he felt really awake and completely focused. His father had fucking tried to commit suicide and kill him in the process, he needed to be focused right now.

"Your car fell off the bridge and some jogger saw you. She sprang right to the water to help you out. She told me that the car was locked and that you were already unconscious by the time she reached you, so she broke the window and brought you out of the damn car. The thing is, she was alone so she could only take care of one at the time, between you and your father. She first rescued you and dove to get your father. She had already called 911 and we arrived as she was bringing your father out of the water…"

" _Gosh_ … she saved my life." Grizz said, so grateful to this unknown lady.

"Yeah but… As I said, she could only rescue one of you at the same time so your father stayed in the car longer than you did…" she stopped talking for a minute.

"… _and_? What are you trying to tell me, Lizzie ?"

"I'm not sure I should tell you now…I…"

"Please, Elizabeth…I promise I can take it, just tell me the truth."

"Your father didn't wake up…"

"He…he's…" he mumbled, eyes wide open in fear.

"No, he survived. But his heart stopped for too long before we could do anything so right now he's in a coma. There's nothing telling us when he's gonna regain consciousness or if he's ever gonna wake up again. He could as well wake up next week as in ten years…I'm sorry."

"He's _not_ dead ? He's not dead…?! He's not fucking dead ! Hahaha!" Grizz began laughing frantically, half sobbing, half smiling. 

"He tried so hard to kill himself and he didn't die ?! What a joke !" he exclaimed, tears rolling down his tired eyes. 

"I'm…I'm so glad…I'm so glad he didn't die." he finally broke. "I'm so, so glad…" he sobbed quietly. 

Elizabeth felt his heart tighten at the sight of this teenager, so young and yet so hurt. " _First his mother and now his father…I'm so sorry for him…_ " She hugged the mourning boy for what felt like hours before Grizz finally cried himself to sleep. 

When he woke up, he immediately asked to see his father. He entered the quiet hospital room his father was currently in with Lizzie by his side.

Never in his whole life had he seen his father so vulnerable, so weak. He had always seemed so confident, strong and threatening that it was like discovering a new Logan. As much as he hated the violent and hateful one, he hated this version of him much more. This Logan was so silent, so lifeless, so… _dead_.

" _He's not dead._ " Grizz reminded himself. " _He's not ! Don't you ever forget that!_ " he told himself.

He approached his dad's bedside, his trembling hands stretching toward his father's lifeless form. 

"I'm sorry, dad…I'm so sorry I wasn't able to make your life supportable after mum died. I really tried, dad. I tried so hard to make you forget. But it wasn't enough." Grizz whispered to his unconscious father. He took his hand between his slender fingers.

"I'm sorry I wasn't enough. I'm sorry not to have been able to save you from yourself. I hope you'll forgive me one day, cause I won't ever forgive myself for putting you in this situation." A single tear escaped his green eyes.

"I love you, _dad_." At this moment, he decided that the weak and innocent Grizz everyone knew would disappear. No more self-pitying, no more weakness or sad expressions.

" _I have to be strong now. For him."_ he thought.

 

After a few days, a lawyer and a social services lady came to see him. They told him that his mother had left a huge amount of money on a bank account he could only access after his sixteenth birthday.

"Well…that was three days ago, so you can repay your father's debts and get your house back if you want. You also have to decide if you want us to sign you up for foster care or if you think you could be fine on your own. In that case, we'll have you tested so that we're sure it's okay to let a sixteen year old teenager live on his own."

"Look, I'm grateful you're taking those kind of initiative but my father's not _dead_ , okay? He may as well wake up in a few days so I don't think it really is appropriate to think of some fucking foster care…"

"Gareth…The doctor told us that the chances of him waking up so soon are really low, if not inexistent… I'm sorry if I'm being insensitive right now but you already have to consider him gone. In the best case, you'll just go home with him and in the worst, at least you'll be prepared." the social services lady said. 

" _Go fuck yourself._ " he thought.

"All right" he said. "I don't wanna be placed into foster care, my father wasn't much present anyway so I can already take care of myself. Could you take all the money you need from the bank account my mother left for me to get my house back, please…? I just wanna go home…" he asked the lawyer.

"Yes, of course. I'll have the paper signed up by tomorrow afternoon. We'll gladly offer you a hotel room for today if you want."

"No, it's fine. I'll go to my friend's house for the night. Could you just lend me your phone so I can call him, please ? Mine drowned with the car…"

"Of course, here you go." the serious man said.

" _Please, Luke, answer. Answer, man. Please..._ "

"Hello ?" 

"Hey Luke.." he said, letting out a loud sigh. 

"Grizz ?! What the fuck man ! How dare you call me so innocently after disappearing for three whole days ?! I know you didn't want a party but you clearly went too far this time !"

"Luke… I had a car accident." Grizz explained, trying to stay calm.

"That's no excu… _Wait_ , _what_ …?" he suddenly calmed down. Now completely worried for his friend. "You had a car accident…? Oh my God, man, I'm sorry Grizz, I didn't know…"

"That's why I'm telling you right now." he answered, half smiling.

"What happened ? Is it your father again ?! I swear to God if he did something to you again, this time I'm gonna kill him !"

"You don't have to worry about him hurting me anymore, Luke…" Grizz said, feeling the emotions rushing in.

"What do you mean?" Luke asked, fear and anxiety in his voice.

"Well, we had the accident and I'm fine but he… he's in a coma for now."

"Grizz, I'm…"

"The doctor said he won't wake up anytime soon but he's not dead, it will just take time for him to wake up, that's all…He's not dead, he's not…"

"Grizz. I'm sorry for your father and you have all my support…"

"It's fine, Luke. I don't need support, it's not like he's dead or something, he's… he's just sleeping. He's just sleeping for a bit and he'll be fine after resting…" Grizz continued with the non-sense. The lawyer took the phone back from the shaking teenager as the social services lady tried to calm him.

"Hello ? Morning, I'm M.Visser's lawyer."

"Huh… Hi ? I'm sorry but is Grizz alright ? He didn't seem really…"

"M.Visser is just a bit confused at the moment but he's already calming down. There was some financial problems with my client house and he cannot return home before tomorrow afternoon, would it be okay to come get him at the hospital and let him sleep at your place for the night ? We offered him a hotel room but he said he would prefer spend the night with you."

"Yes of course, I'll come get him and he can stay with me for the night. I think he really need his friends right now, I'll ask the guys to tag along too."

"Thank you very much, I'll give the phone back to M.Visser now, have a good day, sir."

"Thanks!"

"Luke ?"

"Hey, man. So, what about a sleepover tonight with the guys ? I just need to call Clark and Jay and…"

"I'm not sure it's a great idea Luke…I'm not…"

"W _hat the fuck are you saying, Grizz?_ " he thought to himself. " _Back to self-pity and sad excuses again ? What happened to the new strong and determined Grizz? Right._ "

"You know what? It's a great idea. Let's have a sleepover at your place tonight. I could use some distraction and we didn't do anything for my birthday in the end !"

"That's the spirit, dude ! Hahaha ! I'll come get you at the hospital and we'll organize that after we get you home."

"Okay, see you then !"

"See you, Grizz !"

 

Grizz had the best birthday party he ever had. He was with his friends, not fearing to go back home to an abusive father and finally free. 

"I'm sorry to bring this up right now, but with your father in the coma, what are you gonna do, Grizz ? Are you going into foster care…?" Clark said.

"Hell no !" laughed the boy. "I'm gonna live alone at home, go back to school and all. I plan on being on the field Monday morning with you guys. I guess that now that my father's out of the picture, I could play the violin and dance again, maybe. We'll see."

"That's great ! For a moment I was afraid you'd have to leave town. But it seems you love us too much to leave town !" laughed Jason.

 

Grizz felt really great, feeling a bit ashamed for having such a good time when he's father was in the verge of death. But he didn't care. He was finally free and he wasn't ready to give up this freedom a second time.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry I took longer than usually to post this chapter...
> 
> Next chapters, we'll finally be back in the Netflix show's timeline !
> 
> Hope you like it, don't forget to comment to let me know what you think :))))))
> 
> See you !


	12. West Ham

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The beginning of a new Society.

Two years later, Grizz was now a successful football player. Pretty popular with his three buddies, he was finally gonna get out of high school. The school trip, prom and bye bye West Ham. 

His father was still in the same state as two years before, but Grizz wasn't bothered by it anymore. It felt so great to finally be free from all the beatings, fear and pain that Grizz was really happy. Of course, he wanted his father to wake up and visited him every two days but the situation wasn't so bad after all… 

There was just one thing that bothered him : Sam. He could sense that his feelings for the deaf young man were constantly growing even if they didn't talk to each other anymore. Sam had his friends and he had the football team. He sometimes just watched Sam from afar, a wide idiotic smile on his face.

He knew he wasn't interested in girls anymore but couldn't bring himself to tell Luke the truth. He knew his friend was tolerant and open-minded but he didn't want him to look at him differently. He needed this stability in his life and Luke was a real anchor for Grizz. 

 

He hadn't had any power incident for a few years now. Whenever he didn't feel comfortable with all the feelings surrounding him, Luke and him would find a way out, breathe some fresh air. He sometimes tried to take in his father's pain but he couldn't feel anything coming from his lifeless body. 

However, Luke often came to him to heal quarterback injuries. 

"Man, you have to be more careful on the field… I'm not some fucking hot nurse, you know?"

"Oh come on, I know you love healing me ! Hahaha"

"Mmh… just be careful, there is just so much I can take, you know it."

"Yeah, I know, sorry… How's your heart by the way ?"

"Well I take heavy medication when we have football practice but there are secondary effects. It hurts a bit sometimes and I have to be more careful in a regular basis."

"Are you sure, it's a good thing for you to still play football?"

"I still play cause I can be with you guys and I know that's what my dad would have wanted me to do, so…It's not because he's in a coma at the hospital that I can't make him proud of me."

"I'm sorry, Grizz but you know I can't understand your sudden forgiveness. Your father, coma or not, is still a bastard in my eyes. He hit you, insulted you and even tried to kill you with him…I'm not sure you should put your health at risk just to make this bastard proud or anything…"

" _Luke_. He's still my father and I love him, okay ? He's in a coma, so try to respect him for once. And, please, respect my choices, without insulting my dad."

"Alright, sorry, man." Luke apologized.

"It's fine, he was a bastard after all." he said, smiling to his friend.

"Hey guys !" Clark and Jason called as they jogged up to Luke and Grizz's level.

"Hey" they answered.

"Wanna smoke a bit?" asked Jason.

"Hey ! Be careful with your lighter, man !"

"All right, last one for a week. We don't wanna start a forest fire." Grizz said.

"Hey. What's that ?" asked Luke.

"Graffiti" Clark said.

"Yeah I know it's graffiti, man. But when was the last time you guys saw graffiti in this town?" 

"It's the writing on the wall." Grizz suddenly said, looking carefully at the writing.

 

Everything went down from there.

When the kids returned from the cancelled school trip, No one was there to wait for them. Grizz didn't care as no one was supposed to wait for him at home but he was beginning to get worried as to where the other's parents were. 

When he got home, he tried contacting the hospital to be sure everything was fine with his father but nothing worked.

After Emily's death, Grizz was clearly freaking out. He had just buried a young healthy girl and could feel all West Ham's suffering feelings at the same time. He really didn't feel well but Jason's attempts at cheering the guys up were so innocent and so hopeful that he finally gave in and laughed with his team. 

He even played Fugitive with the others and was really happy to have the occasion to talk with Elle and everybody. He had a great time at Harry's place after the game and his sorrow was gone for a while.

But the lights went off. Suddenly everybody rushed to the stores and chaos soon was all over the place. At first he could take the negative feelings but as things accelerated, everything suddenly oppressed him and he crumbled to the floor in the middle of the shop. He screamed, gripping his shirt, as people were running randomly from everywhere. After a few minutes of pure agonizing pain, Luke spotted Grizz in the dark and rushed at his side.

"Grizz ?! What's wrong, man ? Are you hurt?"

"The…the feelings…" he mumbled.

"Oh fuck ! I'm gonna get you out of here !"

As he helped his friend to his feet, Luke tried to shelter him from any harm. Grizz raised his head up to look at the messy scene and discovered a hellish picture. People running everywhere, saccaging the town. He spotted someone setting fire to a car without any lighter. Then another one electrocuted someone without any taser or anything. She just touched him.

"What the…" Grizz said, eyes wide at the general confusion.

"Come on, man. I'm getting you home, you can't stay here with your capacities."

"But if someone's hurt, I could maybe help…"

"Help ? How, Grizz ? You can already barely stand, you think you can heal anyone in this condition ? It's out of question, you're going home with me and Allie."

With that, the three of them walked home, not bothering about the rain anymore.

 

The next morning, Grizz had a huge headache. " _Oy…Great…_ " he thought.

"Are you awake, Grizz?" Allie gently asked, knocking at his door.

"Yeah, I'll be downstairs in a minute !" he called.

When he joined the others, a serious and depressed mood reigned over the room. He could already feel that his power would be a huge problem if he had to stay with depressed people. 

"Hey guys, cheer up, we're gonna figure something out, okay ?" he tried.

"Oh shut up, Grizz. You're always so happy and carefree. I bet you never had to do anything hard in your whole life. But guess what, we're in real deep shit right now ! So no, it's not gonna be okay !" Cassandra snapped at him.

"Hey, easy on Grizz, Cassandra. You don't know anything, so just shut the fuck up ! If you talk to him like that ever again…" Luke answered.

"Guys !" Grizz suddenly shouted.

"Luke, thanks, but let her say what she thinks. I'm fine. And Cassandra, I'm sorry if I was being insensitive. I understand how serious our situation is right now, but I just wanted you all to feel a little better, okay? No offense."

"I'm sorry Grizz, I'm a bit on edge right now…"

"It's fine."

"Well, I think we should instate some sort of socialism society, if we wanna survive. But how are we gonna distribute people within this so called society…? This is so fucked up, people are never gonna agree." Cassandra continued.

"I think I may have a way to make a specialized assigning list." he said.

"How?" they all asked, turning their full attention on Grizz.

"Well, just answer my question for now…do you people have some weird power or capacity…?" Grizz tried.

"Huh, Grizz, are you sure…?" Luke asked him quietly.

"Trust me on this Luke." he answered.

The first to speak was Will.

"Well, please don't judge me, but yes, I have some sort of power ; I can manipulate small objects like knives or things like that…" Will said.

"Hey ! Just like me !" Luke exclaimed.

"That's what I thought…" said Grizz, a small smile growing on his face.

"I think everybody in this city possesses strange powers and I think at least some of these powers really could help us survive in here."

"What are you thinking about?" Cassandra asked.

"You'll see at the meeting this evening, I'll explain it all to everyone." Grizz announced, planning his next move.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Grizzam's on its way, just wait for it :)


	13. New Rules

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Grizz explains the plan.

"Attention please ! Well, thank you all for coming here tonight. I think we all understand now that if we want to survive, we're gonna have to work together. We need to know what we have and what we're at risk of running out of. So…" Cassandra gave a whole speech about how this new society would work from now on, what the rules would be and how they were gonna be applied. 

"And as for the repartition of all this work, I let Grizz take it from here, thank you." everybody applauded her and Grizz could sense anxiety rising in him. He never really had trouble stepping in the front and talking in front of people but what he was about to tell them was so private, so intimate that he just feared the reactions. 

He felt a small hand patting his shoulder.

"Hey, it's gonna be fine, bud. They're gonna listen to you, don't worry." Luke reassured his friend. And with that, Grizz got up and walked in front of the crowd.

"Hello everybody... Hum…I proposed a way to distribute people for the different working places we have but I'm gonna need your help to do so."

"What is he talking about ? He told us he had figured a way…" whispered Cassandra to her sister.

"First, I think we all have to be honest with each other. I know what I'm about to say is going to sound crazy but well, nothing to lose, right ?" Grizz said, smiling nervously. 

"I have a strange capacity and I know all of you have one too."

The crowd suddenly became agitated and Grizz could see all sorts of expressions on people's face. Shame, anger, betrayal...

"I'm not judging anyone ! I'm just saying…Let's be honest, we all have some weirdo powers and nobody wants to talk about them!"

With that, the crowd fell silent again.

"I saw some of you use it, I've used it myself for years now. It's nothing to be afraid of. We all have those capacities, there's no need to be scared about judgment or rejection. We are all in the same situation."

Grizz could sense the whole crowd easing a bit, before talking again.

"I know that some of you are maybe afraid of their powers, or afraid of what people would think about it. We've kept them hidden for so long. But today, I think that we can't afford to hide them anymore… We need it. We need it to survive."

People didn't like to be pushed and were getting flustered.

"Trust me, I know ! I've never revealed my power to anyone before, except for one friend, because I had no choice. I was afraid of it, afraid it would hurt me, afraid people would take advantage of me. But right now, I know we need this power. I know we need all of them. And I trust you. I'm ready to do this because I trust you and because we're all we have now, right? We only have each other."

The crowd was silent again and someone stepped out and shouted :

"If you trust everybody so much, why don't you just tell us what your power is ?!"

Grizz hesitated for a few seconds before pulling himself together and answered.

"I'm a healer. I can heal any wound by taking the pain as my own."

Everybody stared at him, eyes wide in amazement that he actually had told them.

"It's a very dangerous power for me, cause the pain doesn't just fade away, I just take it all in, you know ? But I trust you. And I know that a power like mine, in a society where we have no medical competences and equipment is highly useful. I know it's gonna hurt, I know it's gonna be hard. But I don't care, cause this is what I'm supposed to do here."

Nobody dared to say anything.

"We're like… 200 young people with powerful capacities here ! I'm sure a lot of your powers can be a great help to this city and that we can all find a place suited for us. Some of you could even not be aware of its use yet but I promise, you're all important."

"I know some of you don't want their power to be outed and it's fine. You don't have to do anything you're not comfortable with. So here's how I see it. We should dress a list of everybody's power. This list will be anonymous, kept secret and hidden. A comity will be in charge of selecting all the powers that could be huge assets to the different parts of the city. Only one person, chosen by you, will be allowed to access the list and contact the people involved. This way, everybody can keep their intimacy but we also have a way to access this huge resource that are your powers. When we'll come to you, asking you to take this or that job, you will of course have the choice to accept or refuse. Without any pressure thanks to the secrecy."

"I know it's a lot to take in and I understand that I'm being pushy right now but…"

"I'm in !" someone said. 

"Me too." 

"I am too!" 

And with that everybody started rising their hand in some sort of unsaid voting. Grizz felt trust and tolerant feelings rushing through him and was really happy about it. Everybody, except for Campbell, Elle and Allie raised their hand.

"And what about violent powers? Are you going to restrain them ? Or maybe arrest those people?!" Elle shouted.

"Of course not. Having a power is no crime. We're not gonna be some sort of "power" police station. If you have a violent power, I'll be happy to help you control it but what you do with it is your whole responsibility and I'm never gonna ask you to give up on your power because it may or may not hurt someone. I'm just offering a way to put some of your powers at use for the whole group, that's all."

Elle slowly raised her hand, followed by Campbell and soon Allie. Everybody had now their hand up.

"Thanks, thanks guys." Grizz said, widely smiling now.

"As for who should be the "power keeper", I think i'm speaking in the names of everyone here by signing you up, Grizz. We're gonna vote of course, but I think we all pretty much agree that you'll be a great keeper." Cassandra said, standing up next to him.

"So who's in favor for Grizz as our "power keeper" candidate ?"

Everybody lifted their hand, without a hence of hesitation. 

"Well, so that's settled, thanks Grizz ! Everybody, please come to him to list your powers by tomorrow night, so that we can work on the assignments schedule. Have a nice evening !"

 

_Oh god, just what did I get myself into…?_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Short chapter but I felt it was already complicated enough to add more action to this one.
> 
> But don't worry, once everything will be settled down, there'll be lots of action !
> 
> Hope you like the way this fanfic is going, please let me know :)))
> 
> See you !


	14. The Powers

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Grizz discovers each power with amazement.

"Huh, wait, Cassandra !" Grizz called her as everybody was slowly getting out of the church after the meeting.

"Yeah, what is it Grizz ?" she answered, still walking.

"It's just… Are you sure it's really a good idea to let me handle the power list…? I'm not sure I'm the best candidate out here and…"

"Grizz. Calm down, it's gonna be fine. None of us really asked for any of those responsibility and the power list as well as the medical branch are yours."

"No, I don't mean that I don't wanna be the power keeper, in fact I'd be honored, but I'm not sure I'm the _best_ one suited to the job…"

"And why is that so ? I think everybody agrees with me when I'm telling you that you're the only one that can do this job. You're understanding, tolerant and judgement-free, Grizz. Believe me, you're the best choice."

"Okay… if you say so…"

 

When they were back home, Grizz rearranged his bedroom to welcome everybody. He prepared a list of name codes so that even if someone managed to get their hand on the power list, they wouldn't be able to know which power matches which name. Then, he called for Luke.

"Yeah, man?" Luke said, coming to his bedroom.

"If it's okay with you, I need you to do something for me, dude."

"Anything, Grizz." Luke answered, smiling.

"I need you to welcome the people who're coming to tell me their power and to warn them." Grizz began.

"About what?"

"I need you to explain to them that I also can sense their feelings and that if they need it, I'm able to take their emotional frustrations."

"Are you sure you'll be able to handle it?"

"Yeah, I'm sure, don't worry. I also need you to warn them that if they're emotionally unstable and if they don't want me to find out, they absolutely can't touch me."

"Of course."

"Tell them that if they touch me, I may also see parts of their past or traumatic events. I know there's nothing more scary than someone discovering all your secrets without consent. They really have to understand that if they don't want to tell me anything, it's fine, but they really better not touch me. Remind them that I can't control this."

"Will do, man. Are you sure you really should put yourself at such risks...?"

"I'll be fine, Luke, but thank you for worrying about me."

"Anytime, dude."

 

With that, the first to come in was Will. 

"Hey Will, how are you ?"

"I'm fine, thanks. I came in first cause you already know my power, I thought it would be easier for you to begin with me."

"Thanks, but I still have a few other questions, if you don't mind."

"No problem." Will answered.

"So, you're capable of cutting through things, is that right? Can you cut through any material or is it something specific?"

"Well, I can't cut through tough things like wood or concrete. Otherwise I can cut a lot of things."

"All right, and does this demands you a lot of energy or could you go on cutting things all night long?"

"It never tired me before, I'm fine with cutting all night."

"Okay, thank you for your time. I think you'll probably work at the kitchens, but I'll tell you later for sure."

"Right. Thanks, Grizz, see you !"

"See you!" Grizz said, writing everything down.

 

Next to come in was Kelly.

"Hey Kelly, it's good to see you."

"Yeah you too, Grizz."

"So, what are your capacities…?" he asked shyly.

"Well, I can relate to your own in fact. I can visualize other people's pain. I can't take in their suffering like you do but I can see and sense where the pain is located."

"That's pretty cool. Can you do that with any pain, like physical and emotional?"

"Yeah, I localize physical pain more precisely but I can also sense emotional pain. It's a bit frustrating sometimes cause I can't do anything but see where it is…I wish I had your power."

"Oh trust me, you don't. Localize someone's injury is so important, it really is great, don't worry about it. I'll put you in the medical branch with me if you're okay with that."

"Yes, of course. I want to help people just like you do and if I can be of any help, I'll gladly join you."

"Thanks, last question : does this power require you to use a lot of energy ?"

"No, I'm never tired after doing it, even for the whole day."

"All right, thank you Kelly !"

"You're very welcome!"

Allie and Cassandra came together, explaining to Grizz that their power was shared thinking. The sister's were connected and could talk with each other without saying any words. Becca had discovered her power much recently : photographic memory. Gordie and his friend were super intelligent, like really really intelligent. They could be considered geniuses and understood things on a whole other level than everybody else.

 

Then came the time of Sam's power.

"Can I come in…?" Sam mutely asked, smiling.

"Hey Sam, of course !" Grizz felt his heart speed up.

"How are you doing, for now ?" Sam said.

"I'm a bit tired but I'm fine. I'm really happy people trust me so much with their secrets. This is really inspiring."

"I'm glad to hear that." Sam answered, still smiling. 

There was an awkward silence between them when Sam sat down.

"So…wanna tell me about your power, Sam?"

"Hum…it's not something I ever talked about…"

"I understand, don't worry, I won't tell anything to anyone. I'm sure your power is great."

"Hum…I can see _colors_."

"Colors?"

"Yeah, you know, I'm deaf, but I can see sounds and emotions as colors. It's like seeing the aura of other people's in beautiful shades of colors."

"Wow… so, when I talk, can you kinda _see_ what I'm saying?"

"Yeah, when you talk, depend on your emotions and all, I can see beautiful warm colors." Sam said, blushing.

Grizz's heart stopped. " _He's so cute. I'm not surprised his power is such a beautiful, innocent and poetic one…_ "

"It's amazing, Sam." he said, eyes full of hope and joy.

"Thank you… I hope I had a more useful power like yours but it really helps me to connect with people. Sign language and lips reading can't really translate intonations or emotions, so I guess it's my way of understanding the world."

"Yeah, it really is wonderful."

"Right now, I can see warm embarrassed and shy pink when you talk." Sam added, playfully.

"Oh, yeah ? Oh I'm sorry, it's just hum…" Grizz panicked.

"I'm kidding, you're just blushing." he added, giggling.

"Sam ! Hahaha" Grizz was now completely laughing. It was so great to be near Sam, Grizz felt really at ease with him. It was like he could finally be himself with his deaf friend. 

"Well, I hope I'll see you soon, Grizz." Sam said, taking his leave.

"Yeah, I really hope so." answered Grizz, smiling warmly.

 

He discovered other powers for the rest of the day. Helena had powerful electricity capacities as the strong woman she was. When Elle came in, telling Grizz about her fire power, she asked him to take her emotional pain. She explained that she always had to be careful not to harm her family and friend because of it. He told her he would help her control it and not to be afraid of it anymore. 

After their encounter, Grizz was feeling a bit weak and exhausted. He wasn't prepared for the next guest.

"Hey, Grizz."

"Hello, _Campbell_ …"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Campbell coming next chapter... be prepared ;)


	15. Campbell

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Grizz talks with Campbell, we learn a few things...

"Hey, Grizz."

"Hello, _Campbell_ …"

"Just saw my girl walking out of your room, so… what's her power? She won't tell me."

"You know I can't tell you Campbell."

"Yeah, whatever. So what's gonna happen ? You gonna play fucking shrink with me ?"

"No, I'm not. I just need to know exactly what you can do, so I'll be able to give you a suitable job."

"Well, I know for sure, mine won't suit anywhere, so can we call it a day?"

"Campbell, I'm not a fucking idiot, why did you come here if you don't even want me to know about your power?"

"Hum…I heard people say you could, you know…Take the pain away…?"

"Yeah, I can. But I won't take it unless you tell me about it… I'm not a healing whore you know?"

"I can destroy things."

"What do you mean, _destroy_?" Grizz asked, not surprised Campbell's power to be a violent one.

"If I want to, I can just touch things and they kinda disintegrate. Like the whole shit turns to dust and there's nothing left of it. Object or living."

" _Object or living ?!_ " Grizz thought, feeling the real threat this power truly was.

"And do you always control it or does it run out of hand sometimes ? Like…if you're angry?"

"Nope. Always have it under control. If I destroy something when I'm mad, it just means I wanted to destroy it."

"I guess it must have been hard for you…"

"Oh don't play fucking therapist with me, Grizz. I'm not some kind of damsel in distress like my brother. And don't you dare fucking touch me. I know what you do to people, you freak."

" _Huh...What?_ "

"Your whole touching thing is just some fucking way to see in people's past. Don't think I haven't figured you out, man. I know you're not as gentle and kind as everybody seems to think."

"Well, I'm sorry you feel this way about me, Campbell. I never wanted to invade your privacy, I just…" he said, reaching a hand to the teenager, out of habit.

"I said don't touch me, _freak_ !" Campbell snapped at him.

"I'm sorry, I really didn't mean to… Hum, back to it, does this power require energy from you?" Grizz tried to stay calm. He already had had enough of this meeting.

"I guess not."

"And you talked about taking the pain away?"

"Yeah, well, forget about it, you can't help me."

"And why not?"

"You can't take _memories_ away, can you?"

"No I can't, but I can ease the pain those memories bring. But I can't do it without touching you, you know..." Grizz began to wonder about what Campbell wanted to forget.

"Never mind then, I'm fine on my own." he said, getting up.

"Wait, Campbell…" Grizz said, getting up as well and going after the mysterious boy.

"I told you to let it fucking go, weirdo !" Campbell shouted, pushing Grizz out of the way. The moment he touched Grizz, he knew he had made a huge mistake.

Pictures of hurtful memories and dark events rushed through Grizz as he crumbled to the floor, holding his head. He began hyperventilating, as he felt Campbell's past flowing through his whole being. There were pictures of physical abuse, of a father hitting a child ; much more than what Grizz could take, considering his own history. He felt as if his head was about to explode and began to scream, violent emotions forcing their way into him.

"You fucking asshole !" Campbell yelled. He grabbed Grizz from the floor and pinned him against the wall.

"Camp…bell…I'm sorry, I didn't…mean to…" Grizz mumbled, trying to pull himself together.

"Fucking bastard ! I know you did it on purpose !" 

"I swear, Campbell…I didn't. But…I can he…help you if you want…I've also been hurt by my father in the past, you…you don't have to fa…ce this alone…" Grizz tried to say. It was hard to talk as Campbell began to choke him against the wall.

"I swear to God, Grizz. If you say anything about what you just saw, I'm gonna make you suffer. _Really bad._ "

"I know you're hurt…but it's gonna be f…fine. I can help you…" Grizz was beginning to panic, seeing that Campbell had absolutely no intention on releasing him.

"I don't want your freaking help, motherfucker. Just because our fucking father beat the crap out of us both doesn't mean we're anything alike. I swear, Grizz, if you say anything, I'm gonna fucking _kill_ you." Campbell threatened him.

"Please…let..let me go, I can't…breathe." Grizz begged, as dark circles began to cloud his vision.

"I don't fucking care."

"Sto…p"

 

Suddenly the door opened and Luke threw Campbell away from the suffocating boy. Grizz fell limply on the floor.

"What the fuck, Campbell ! Just what the hell do you think you're doing ?!" Luke yelled, about to punch him.

"No…Luke, stop !" Grizz screamed.

Luke stopped abruptly, looking at his hurt best friend before seeing that his power had gone out of hand because of his anger. All the objects in the room were now floating in the air and Luke tried to put them down slowly before rushing to his friend lying on the floor. 

"Grizz, Grizz!" he called him, but the fragile boy had already passed out from all the emotions and exhaustion.

 

"Grizz…Grizz, you okay?" a worried Sam asked him, seeing his friend waking up.

"Sam…? What are you doing here, and where is Campbell?" he asked, his new headache killing him.

"He went home, Luke kicked his ass out. How are you feeling? What happened with my brother?" Sam half whispered, half signed, tears in his beautiful eyes.

"Hey, Sam…I'm fine, okay. You don't need to worry so much because of me."

"When Luke came, he said my brother was choking you against a wall ! I think it's something serious enough to be worried about you!"

"Yeah, sorry…We had a little incident, it was my fault. He overreacted but I'm the one to blame, really." Grizz explained.

"What happened ? What incident?"

"Well, he accidentally touched me and I saw some parts of his past. He didn't take it so well and you know the rest. Anyway, I'll talk it out with him another day, I really need to finish getting this power list done."

"You shouldn't push yourself like this…You're in no condition. I can see you're exhausted and hurt right now. The colors, remember?"

"I'm fine, Sam. I just had a moment of weakness, but it's okay now. Plus, there aren't a lot of people I still need to see, it'll take one hour at the most."

"I really don't like you to overwork yourself like that…Promise me you'll just rest after the list is done."

"I promise, Sam. Thank you for your concern." Grizz said, smiling warmly to his deaf friend.

 

He wasn't surprised to discover that Clark and Jason's powers were great strength and high speed. The one that amazed him was Henry's power. The confident rich kid could get invisible whenever he wanted to.

" _I guess, he's not as self-assured and bossy as he pretends to be…_ " Grizz thought.

Gwen was the last one to come to him, proposing a power that could just save them all. The discreet girl could grow any plant or any vegetables as long as she had the right seed. 

" _Well…we could just survive after all…_ "

 

After reporting to Allie and Cassandra on the really useful powers he had discovered, Grizz went back to his room.

" _What a day…_ " he thought, before giving in to sleep.

 

In his own room, Campbell was also reflecting on his day, planning his next move.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Finally, Campbell may also have been suffering all these years...


	16. Prom Night

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It's finally prom night, some Grizzam waiting for you :)

Grizz spent the next few days working on the assignment list with Allie, Cassandra, Becca, Gordie and Sam. He was so happy to be able to stay near the deaf boy that he even forgot about his recent unpleasant encounter with his brother. 

After everybody got to work on their assigned job, Grizz joined Kelly at the hospital.

"Hey, Kelly ! Anything new?" he greeted her.

"No, nothing for the moment, that's good news. By the way, are you still in the guard now that you're also working here?"

"Yeah, I just have fewer shifts and I'll just leave if you need me here. Hum, Kelly…there's something I need to ask you."

"Yeah, what is it ?"

"I know you made an inventory of everything we have here and their general use. Did you find any medication related to heart conditions?"

"Hum, yeah I have a whole shelter related to heart medication. Why you ask?"

"Look, I have a heart condition and I take medication for it but I'll soon run out of it. The thing is I don't really want everybody to know I have a weak heart…They already worry enough about me on a daily basis."

"I'll see what I can find. And don't worry, I won't tell a soul. But, you know that even here, we have limited resources… What will happen to you when we run out of heart medication?"

"It's fine, I'll just have to be extra careful not to get worked up and I should be fine. Thank you, Kelly, really appreciate it."

"You're welcome, Grizz." she answered smiling.

 

Then finally came prom night. Grizz and Sam had started seeing each other more frequently and the two boys couldn't be happier. Grizz was trying to sign some nonsense but he didn't care if he was being ridiculous. It was worth it, only to make Sam laugh. He had the most beautiful contagious smile he had ever seen and the most mesmerizing blue eyes the world had created. As they were quietly laughing together, Luke came to them.

"Grizz ! They're letting us have a free stage, come on, man ! It's been so long since I heard you sing!"

"Hum…I'm a bit busy here Luke." Grizz answered, sad his special moment with Sam had been disturbed.

"Wait, you can sing, Grizz?" Sam reacted.

"Just a bit, but it's been ages since I sang something in public like that."

"Come on, I'll play the guitar, dude ! Just like we did back in the old days, it's gonna be so fun!"

"I'm not sure, Luke…" Grizz tried to escape the embarrassing situation.

"Grizz. I need you to go on that stage and to sing. If you don't wanna do it for yourself or the people here, do it for me." Sam said, smiling to a now blushing Grizz.

"You can't even hear it, Sam…" Luke said carefully.

"Remember, colors?" Sam said to Grizz.

"Okay…if you want it so badly, I guess one song won't hurt."

"Great ! I'll get the guitar ! What are you gonna sing, by the way?"

"I have just the song." Grizz replied playfully.

 

They got to the stage and Grizz whispered Luke the song's name. It was a bit old and foolish but the Avril Lavigne song was just perfect for what he had to say. The music began. Grizz sang the first verse and then came the chorus.

" _This innocence is brilliant,_

_I hope that it will stay._

_This moment is perfect,_

_please don't go away._

_I need you now_

_and I'll hold on to it._

_Don't you let it pass you by…_ " Grizz gently sang, looking straight at Sam. The latter couldn't take his eyes from the wonderful warm happy colors emanating from him.

" _It's so beautiful it makes you wanna cry !_ " he lipped-synch in unison with Grizz. 

They were far from each other but both felt so close. At this moment, Sam knew he would do anything for the man singing in front of him. He would go anywhere, run into the forest if they had to, only to spend the rest of his life with Grizz.

A single happy tear escaped Grizz's green eyes. He felt as if nothing and no one could hurt him anymore. As if he suddenly was all alone with Sam in this giant world, invincible and strong. 

" _This moment is really perfect_ " he thought.

 

As the music faded, everybody started applauding the duet, breaking the intense connection between the two young men. But they knew better. 

"That was a great song, Grizz." Sam said, walking to him.

"Thank you ! I was just being sincere and honest." he smiled to the deaf boy.

"Congrats Grizz, it was really a beautiful song !" Becca continued. 

"Thanks, Becca." he answered gently.

"You know, I was thinking… You and Sam used to take dance classes, right?"

"Yeah."

"I was talking with Gordie about cultural stuff and I thought that maybe Sam and you could give dance lessons for those who want to. That would be awesome !" Becca explained.

Sam looked at Grizz with a hopeful and excited face.

"Well, I'll see if I can slip it in my schedule but it's a great idea, thanks Becca !" he said, smiling at Sam.

 

Everybody went home, but Grizz didn't want this evening to ever end. He just had had the best night of his life and the only one to thank for it was Sam. Now he couldn't see what could go wrong anymore, he had Sam and this simple fact would satisfy him for a life time.

 

As Grizz slowly fell asleep, still happily smiling, Cassandra never made it back home.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Short chapter, but finally a little bit of fluff :)))


	17. Finding the Murderer

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The aftermaths of Cassandra's death.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Back to darker chapters...  
> Hope you like it !

After the funeral, Grizz couldn't stand the indescribable silence anymore. Everything and everyone was too quiet and still. He already had struggled really hard with the negative emotions emanating from the whole town, so when he came home to find Allie morning, he couldn't take it anymore.

 

 

"Allie…?" he gently pushed her bedroom door.

"Yeah, what is it, Grizz?" she answered coldly.

"Hum… do you mind talking a bit?"

"I'm not really in the mood right now."

"I…I know, I just wished I could help you."

"Well, can you revive my sister, Grizz?"

"You know I can't. Nobody can."

"Then you can't help me." she said sharply. 

"I can't bare seeing you like this…Maybe I could…take some of your pain for you…?"

"Why are you doing this ? Do you thing people will look at you nicer if you try to take all the pain of the world? Does it help you sleep at night to help the weak?!" she said, now freely mean.

"You know I'm not like that, Allie. I just wanna help a friend who's going through some bad times."

"Yeah, whatever. Take it if you want, I don't care anymore."

"Believe me, you'll feel much better." Grizz said, sitting on the bed with her. He gently took her hands in his and they began glowing. Some of Allie's suffering found their way to Grizz's heart and when he opened his eyes again, he was definitely in huge pain. 

Allie looked at him with big amazed eyes. 

"I…I feel so much better…Thank you, Grizz. I'm sorry to have snapped at you. I shouldn't have said those things to you, I'm so sorry…" she said, tears building in her eyes. She couldn't believe she had been so mean to someone as understanding and generous as Grizz. 

"It's okay, don't worry about it, Allie. I know it was the pain talking. I'm glad to be able to help you. It's not something I'm willing to do for anybody and I'm grateful you agreed."

"I just feel so bad hurting you like this…This is not your burden to carry and yet…"

"Allie, as long as it's your burden, then it's also mine. I don't let my friends down, especially in a time like this. How are you feeling now?"

"Well, I'm still really hurt but it's bearable now. It's somehow as if I just accepted her death…" she said, tears freely falling now.

"I'm sorry for your loss, Allie. I really am." Grizz whispered.

"Thank you, Grizz. And how are you feeling, does it hurt much?" she asked worriedly.

"I'm a bit dizzy but I'll be fine in a minute." he said, resting his head on her shoulder.

They stayed like that for what felt like hours, just enjoying each other's presence.

 

Allie agreed to take Cassandra's role as a leader, much to her discontent. She established new rules and began to investigate her sister's murder. 

After a movie night at the church, the whole crew got together at Allie's place to discuss the Campbell matter. Sam began to explain who his brother really was, tears rolling down his cheeks. 

"But why would he want her dead?" Gordie said. "Being a psychopath doesn't give him a reason to kill her. In fact, he seemed pretty alright with her rules and everything."

"Yeah, the one he tried to kill not so long ago was Grizz." Luke answered.

All the eyes were now on Grizz, as if asking for explanation.

"Grizz, you told me you had accidentally touched Campbell, right?" Allie said.

"Yeah, that's what happened."

"But why did he began choking you against the wall ? Grizz, did you see parts of Campbell's past?" Luke asked.

"Yes I did, that's why he was so mad." he simply explained, not seeing where this conversation was leading.

"What did you see, Grizz?" Allie asked.

"I'm sorry but I can't tell you." he answered immediately.

"What? What do you mean you can't tell us ?! This bastard may have killed my sister, Grizz."

"That's no reason for me to reveal his past to you. I won't betray him like that."

"Betray him? Since when are you on his side, dude?!" Luke said, starting to get mad.

"I'm not on his side, man. It's just…Nothing that I saw had anything to do with Cassandra, okay? So just leave it be."

"How can you protect him?" Sam whispered, eyes full of disappointment. It hurt Grizz to see this expression directed at him from Sam.

"I'm not telling you someone's secrets just because you think he may or may not have done something terrible ! How can you _not_ understand?! Would you all want me to give away your deepest secrets because someone suspects you of something without any other argument than " _He's evil_ " ?! I'm sorry but the whole town trust me with their secrets and I can't make any exceptions."

"He's right." Becca stood up. "We don't know if he killed Cassandra or not and frankly I don't think he did. It wouldn't make any sense. We can't ask Grizz to just tell us everything because we have power and that we just wanna know. Thank you, Grizz, for not telling. That's a real proof of loyalty and that's exactly what we need from you in this town."

"But if Campbell didn't kill her, then who did ?!" Allie said.

"I don't know, Allie. I don't know." Becca answered.

 

Grizz felt really bad after their meeting. Did he do the right thing, protecting Campbell's past ? Were they right, did he make a mistake ? No. It wasn't fair. If he was not the killer, he would have regretted telling them about it. 

" _I would hate Luke telling my secrets to anyone who suspects me of something. There's no way I'm gonna do this to Campbell._ " he thought.

 

A few days later, Greg Dewey was arrested and sentenced to death for the murder of Cassandra Pressman. 

When Allie asked the Guard to help with the execution, Grizz knew he wouldn't be able to do it.

"Allie, I don't think I'm gonna be able to do this…"

"Why not, Grizz? First you're protecting Campbell and now you refuse to punish the man who killed my sister? I'm really starting to doubt you." Allie retorted.

" _I was sure she was still mad about this…_ " he thought, feeling so fed up with all this already.

"It's not that I don't support you on this, Allie. It's just that I'm not sure I can do that with my capacities and all. I'm supposed to be a healer, I can't hurt people just like that. I'm afraid his feelings are gonna crush me."

"Well, you're in the Guard, Grizz. So you'll do exactly what I'm telling you to do. Tomorrow morning, you're gonna held a gun at Dewey's head and shoot him, period." and with that she walked away.

Grizz didn't get a minute of sleep that night, too afraid to wake up in the morning. He couldn't do it. He couldn't kill someone. It was far beyond his ability, contradicting his whole being.

Once morning came, Grizz could barely stand ; sleep-depraved, hurt by Allie's words and disgusted by himself for what he was about to do. Dewey calling at him and begging him not to kill him didn't make it any easier. When Allie counted the final countdown, Grizz wished he had missed. But he didn't. He felt the bullet get out of his gun and even though they weren't supposed to know which one of them had killed the murderer, he knew he had.

 

When Sam heard about the Guard being in charge of the execution, his heart stopped.

"Wait, do you mean…Allie asked _Grizz_ to do it?" he said, worry gripping him.

"Yeah, I know they kinda had an argument about it. Grizz told her he couldn't do it and she saw it as betrayal. I heard she forced him to, in the end." Becca explained.

" _What ?!_ She forced Grizz to kill someone ?" Sam said, anger boiling in his veins.

"Yeah. They shot him three days ago. They don't know for sure who pulled the trigger that killed Dewey but Grizz hasn't left his room since then."

But before she could finish her sentence, Sam ran to Allie's place. Barging in the living room where the whole crew - except Grizz- was silently watching TV, Sam stepped right in front of the town leader.

"What the fuck were you thinking asking Grizz to execute Dewey ?!"

"Well, I don't see why Luke and Jason would have to do it and not him. He's not some fucking privileged." Allie coldly said.

"He senses other's feelings, Allie ! You can't ask someone with this capacity to _kill_ someone ! I can't believe you forced him ! After everything he did for you ! He always supported you, he was always there for you, for God's sake, he even took some of your pain when your sister died ! And how do you repay him ?! By forcing him to kill someone against his will ?! What kind of fucking monster are you, Allie?!" he said, the fastest he could while signing at the same time.

"Sam…I…"

"I'm not finished ! How could you do this to Grizz ? To _Grizz_ ?! We all know this man is only capable of love, tolerance and trust ! What you asked of him goes against every fiber of his being ! Who do you think you are, Allie ? Some fucking God ?! You think you can force people to do anything, just because you're the leader now ?! That's not how it works !" He was now panting, rage in his eyes.

"You know what, next time, we'll force _you_ kill the murderer, Allie. See what it feels like."

 

And with that, Sam rushed upstairs. As he approached Grizz's room, he could already see dark shades of sad blue emotions coming from inside.

"Grizz…? Can I come in, please?"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I love Allie and Grizz's friendship but I wanted it to be a little deeper with ups and downs.  
> Please tell me what you think about it :)
> 
> See you soon !


	18. The Past

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sam and Grizz sort everything out.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> WARNING Mentions of self-harm and sensitive content in this chapter.

  _Blood…Blood splattered all over the floor._ Sam lifted his head up. _Blood all around the bed…_

 

"Grizz…Grizz what happened, did you get a nose bleed?" he whispered the best he could. He wasn't sure Grizz had heard him from under the heavy sheets. There were so many dark colors coming from the bed… From the way the sheets moved, he knew Grizz was heavily crying under them.

"Grizz, it's gonna be okay. I'm here for you." Sam said, moving around the bed. What he discovered on the other side froze him to the core. So much blood, old pictures, a _razor_ …

"Oh my God!"

"Grizz ! Grizz, what did you do?!" he tried to scream, picking up the blanket covering the young man.

There he found him. Eyes red from crying for so long, blank scared face and mostly…bloody wrists. He jumped on him, trying to press on his wrists with the first sheet he found.

"Oh my God, _Grizz_. No…Not that ! Why did you do that, Grizz?! Luke ! Luke !" he yelled as loud as he could with his broken voice.

"S…Sam…?"

"Yes, it's me, Grizz. It's gonna be alright. Don't you dare die on me !"

"Sam…Sam…I'm so sorry…I'm so…" Grizz sobbed.

"What is it, Sam?" Luke tiredly asked, before noticing the mess on the floor. 

"For christ's sake, what's with all the blood ?!"

"Luke, I need you to call Kelly, right now. Tell her to come as fast as possible, this is an emergency !"

"Grizz ? What happened ? Are you okay?" Luke panicked, trying to get to his best friend.

" _Luke !_ Do what I tell you and get the fuck out of here !"

"O…Okay, I'll go get her !" And with that, Luke ran out of the house.

"Grizz ? Grizz, can you hear me?" Sam whispered, pulling himself together.

"Sam…Sam, I'm so sorry…"

"Yeah, I know. Why did you do that, Grizz? I know Allie forced you to…"

"No, it's not Allie…She's not the problem, _I_ am." he whimpered.

"What ? What are you talking about?" Sam asked with so much worry in his eyes. What could be so bad this brilliant strong young man would try to kill himself for?

"It's _me_ …I'm so disgusting, I'm so tainted…I can't taint you too, Sam. You're too pure for me to corrupt you, I can't do that to you…Me being alive is not good for you, for anyone." he whispered frantically.

"Grizz, what the fuck are you saying?! You're not tainted, you're not disgusting. Allie forced you to kill Dewey. It wasn't your fault, you had to."

"It's not just Dewey, Sam ! You don't know anything about me, you don't know how disgusting I am. You have no idea of what I've done in the past, you can't understand."

"Well, explain it to me then. Tell me, confide in me. I'm never gonna judge you, Grizz. Whatever you did in the past is not worth you hurting yourself like that !"

"No, I can't tell you, I can't. You're too good for me Sam, I won't put you through all that. I'm not worth it…I should just die, it's best for everybody."

"Grizz, please. It hurts me so much to see you like that and not be able to do anything to help you…I know you can relate, you know how bad it is to see someone you love hurting. Let me do this for you. Let me in, Grizz. I don't just want to know the good parts of your life. I'm here for you, for the good and the bad."

"You're gonna regret it, Sam…"

"I'm not, believe me. I like you, and I want to know all about you. The past, the present, the future."

"No…no…you're just trying to confuse me…I can't, I can't." he went on.

"Please, Grizz. I can't live in a word without you by my side. I need you, Grizz ! I need you to be safe."

"You…You _need_ me…?" he said, light coming back into his green wet eyes.

"Yes, yes I do ! I need you here with me. I can't do it without you. But please, tell me what's bothering you. What did you do in the past that's so terrible ?"

"It's…it's a long story, Sam."

"Then tell me all about it, Grizz. I'll listen to you my whole life if you want me to. Just…please, don't ever talk about killing yourself like that…"

"I…I'm so sorry, Sam. I won't, I promise." he said, tears still rolling down his red cheeks.

"Alright. Then tell me why you think you're disgusting and tainted." Sam calmed down.

"Well, I guess it began with my mum…"

"Sam ? Sam ?! How is he ? Is he alright?! Kelly's here !" Luke barged in the room. 

Surprised by his best friend's sudden entrance, Grizz crawled under the blanket. Hiding his bloody wrists, he was too ashamed to face his best friend right now.

"He's gonna be fine, get her upstairs and please leave us alone." Sam calmly replied.

"But…Come on, man. I'm his best friend, I have to be here for…"

" _Luke._ No offense, but I don't think Grizz wants to see anyone right now. I'm glad you're here for him, but just this time, let me handle it, okay?" Sam retorted, seeing how the bleeding boy was more and more hiding under the sheets.

"Alright…Kelly ? Can you come upstairs, please ?" he said, getting out.

Kelly quietly came in. When she saw all the blood, she looked alarmed. Sam shushed her, before turning to Grizz.

"Grizz…? Kelly's here, she's gonna stop the bleeding from your wrists and bandage you, okay ? It's gonna be fine, no need to be ashamed or hide, alright ? No one's judging you, no one's blaming you. I'll stay here all the way, okay ? I'm not going anywhere and after she makes sure you're okay, we'll go on with our talk. Can you come out from under the sheets now, please?"

"…Is…Is Luke still here…?" he mumbled.

"No, he's gone. It's just Kelly, you and me."

"…Okay then." he said, shifting to a visible seated position.

Kelly got closer, understanding now the cause of her friend's injury. He hurt himself, that was clear.

" _But why…?!_ " she thought, but didn't say anything. She knew suicidal people could get scared easily when vulnerable and she didn't want to hurt Grizz even more by asking embarrassing questions.

"Okay, Grizz. Can you show me your wrists, please ? Are you feeling light-headed or dizzy ? When did you eat for the last time ?" she asked, in a very professional way.

"I'm a bit dizzy, but otherwise I'm fine…As for the meal, I don't know what day it is but last time I ate was the day before Dewey's execution."

" _He's been alone in this room for three whole days…?! How come no one fucking came to see how he was ?! If they had tried to help him, maybe he wouldn't have…_ " Sam thought, sad feelings invading him.

"Sam…don't be sad. Please…I'm sorry I did this, okay…? So please, don't be sad…" Grizz told his friend, looking so depressed.

" _Oh yeah, I forgot he could sense bad vibes…God it must have been so hard killing Dewey…_ " he thought.

"Okay, so the bleeding stopped for now. I don't think you're in risk of life-threatening anaemia but you clearly should eat something, Grizz. You can't go on three days without eating, not in your condition." she was referring to his heart condition and he knew it.

"Just try to sleep, eat and don't overwork yourself. You should be fine." Kelly said.

"Thank you, Kelly. I'm sorry you had to do that." Grizz apologized, looking at his bandaged wrists.

"No problem, Grizz., just doing my job. Just… _please_ , don't hurt yourself like that ever again. I won't be able to handle the whole hospital by myself." she said, with a soft smile.

"I won't. Sorry to worry you like that."

"It's fine. Well, I'll leave you two alone now. See you !" Kelly said, getting out of the room.

"Thank you, Kelly." Sam signed.

 

"So, where were we again? Ah yeah, you were going to tell me about your mother." Sam said, getting comfortable on the bed. He sat cross-legged in front of Grizz.

"Yeah…My mum. She and I had a car accident on my eighth birthday. I woke up with a few injures but she didn't make it." he was much calmer now.

"Oh…I'm sorry Grizz."

"It's okay, I'm over it now. But my father never accepted it. After her death, he became more and more violent and began hitting me on a regular basis." Grizz confessed. He had never told this to anyone except for Luke and it really hurt to think of those dark times again.

"Wait, what…? Your father _hit_ you…? But you were like what, eight-nine years old…" Sam answered, completely shocked.

"My age never bothered him apparently. Anyway, he had his ups and downs but it became much worse when he lost his job. He completely spiraled out of control and began gambling, paying prostitutes and drinking."

Grizz stopped for a second, wondering if he really should tell Sam about his deepest secret. It was something he never even told Luke. " _What do I have to lose now, anyway…? I'm sure Sam never wants to speak to me ever again already, so…_ "

"Grizz…? It's okay if you wanna take a break, I know it's a lot…"

" _He raped me._ " 

 

There were long silent seconds. Neither could say anything for a moment but Sam was the first to speak.

"Grizz, what… _what did you just say…?_ " he couldn't believe it, couldn't comprehend something like that happening to Grizz.

"When the prostitutes couldn't stand his violent personality anymore, he turned to me. I…I tried, Sam. I tried to get away…I screamed so hard, I struggled so much…But I couldn't escape…" he broke into tears. He had denied this part of his life for so long, never taking time to cry for himself, that it all suddenly came back to him. He had never cried so hard in his whole life.

Sam didn't know how to react. It was as if someone had just ripped his heart out of his chest. He was in a deep shocked state but Grizz was crying so hardly in front of him that it got him out of his strange trance. 

"Grizz…Grizz…my Grizz…" He hugged him, rocking gently his trembling body.

"You couldn't have done anything, Grizz…you were so young. I'm so sorry… _I'm so sorry, Grizz…_ " he said, crying too.

He could understand now why Grizz saw himself as tainted and disgusting. This must had destroyed any kind of self-esteem left in the abused boy and it was already incredible that he hadn't broken down before.

"You're strong…You're so strong, Grizz. It was not your fault, there was nothing you could have done at the time…You were just a kid, Grizz."

"Look at me. Please look at me…" he gently held his chin up.

"You are not disgusting. You are not tainted. You're hurt. The only one disgusting me is your father. He was the one to do this to you, he's the one who abused you. And you, my dear, are in no way responsible for anything that happened."

"Sam…Sam, I'm so sorry…" he sobbed.

"It's alright, everything is gonna be fine, now. I'm here with you. No one's gonna hurt you anymore, I promise."

"Th…ank you, Sam. Thank you so much…" he looked at him with so much love in his eyes.

Sam answered him with a soft gentle kiss. Grizz responded by pressing his lips even harder against his. When they pulled out, he wasn't crying anymore.

" _You're gonna be fine, I swear_." Sam warmly whispered.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm so sorry to hurt Grizz like that but I don't think any human being could take so much and not think about things like that, so... Just wanted it to feel real.


	19. Recovery

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sam's here for him.

Grizz fell asleep in Sam's loving arms. The latter watched his lover with warm caring eyes. 

" _He_   _really needs it_." he thought.

These few hours of calm were perfect for Sam to think about what to do next. First things first, he had to reassure Luke that his best friend was now alright, so he called for him.

Luke gently knocked on the door before entering the quiet room this time.

"Can I come in ? Grizz ? Sam?" he whispered.

"Yeah you can come in but, please, be quiet. Grizz's sleeping." Sam said.

"Is he alright…? What happened…?" Luke asked, worried.

"I'll explain, but not here. Let's go to another room."

When they were all settled in the bedroom next to Grizz's, Luke began asking questions.

"What the hell happened, Sam ? What was all this blood?!"

"Well, I'm sorry to tell you like that but your dear best friend just tried to end his life, Luke…" Sam said, waiting for Luke's reaction.

" _Wha…_ " He looked utterly shocked and so sad.

"Why did he do that?!" he inquired.

"Cause Allie had him kill Dewey. I guess it was just too much with everything he already went through…"

"Oh, so…he told you."

"Yes he did. Did you know about it too, Luke?"

"Yeah I did. I've known Grizz for as long as I can remember and he always came at my place after his father lashed out at him."

" _Does he know about the rape though?_ " he thought. But he didn't say anything about it, it wasn't his place.

"I'm sorry but I have to ask, why did you leave him alone for three fucking whole days after you executed Dewey…?"

"Well, killing him was also hard on us, you know? Maybe not as violent as it was for Grizz, but still. I didn't leave home much either, it was a lot to cope with. Killing someone can really mess up your mind."

"I guess so…For what it's worth, I'm sorry you had to go through this. And thank you for taking care of Grizz all those years."

"Thank you, it means a lot. I'm glad he found you now though. I'm still here for him of course, but I know that you can bring him a happiness I never will."

"Oh…so you know he's…"

"He never came out to me, but I'm not blind. I saw the way he was looking at you, as if you were the most important and precious being the world had ever created. You don't even imagine how he always talks about you, dude."

Sam felt his cheeks heating up in a deep blush.

"Well, you have to know that I would never hurt him. I'll protect him at all cost."

"I'm sure you will. But is he okay now though? There was so much blood…"

"Yeah, Kelly bandaged him and said he would be fine as long as he rests and eats well. Did you know he didn't leave his bedroom for three whole days, not even bothering to eat?"

"What ?! No, I had no idea. How could Allie not even check on him?!"

"Well, the same way she forced him to kill Dewey."

"Wait, she _forced_ him to ?! What the fuck?!"

"You didn't know ? Grizz told her he wouldn't be able to execute him, given his power and all, and she just forced him to."

"He did seem pretty upset and feeling bad about it too, but I just assumed he was a bit reluctant, like us. And after everything, she didn't even bother to check on him ?! I'm gonna kick her fucking ass!" Luke said, fire in his eyes.

"Please, don't. I don't know how Grizz feels about her but I'm sure you lashing out at her would just make it worse. Let's see what he wants us to do before assuming things."

"You're probably right…" he answered, disappointed.

 

When Sam came back to Grizz's bedroom, he was beginning to wake up. Just seeing him so worn out and barely keeping up broke Sam's heart.

"Hey, love. How are you feeling, now?" he gently whispered, sitting on the bed.

"I'm really tired and I'm sure my eyes are still swollen but I feel much better, thanks. Where did you go?" Grizz said with sleepy eyes.

"I was just filling Luke in on the situation. He was really worried about you."

"Yeah, I always worry him…" Grizz said with a defeated look on his beautiful face.

"Don't worry about it, Grizz. That's what friends are for." 

They stayed in a comfortable silence for a few minutes. Sam had joined Grizz under the blanket, hugging the injured boy.

"Grizz? I'm sorry to ask, but what happened to your father after all of this…? I heard you had a car accident with him a few years ago."

"Yeah, the bastard lost all my mother's money at the casino and tried to kill himself. He found nothing better to do than to take me with him in his madness. He threw the car off some bridge, locking me in it with him. Some jogger saved us, but he stayed too long under the water and fell into a coma."

"Deserves him right, asshole." Sam whispered.

"Thank you for taking my side, Sam."

"There's no side to pick, Grizz. He was just a fucking bastard for hurting you like that."

"Well, thank you anyway." he gently smiled at his lover. Sam gladly returned the smile.

"Grizz, what do you want to do from now on?"

"What do you mean ? When I'm well enough, I'll go back to the Guard and to the hospital to help Kelly out, why?"

"Well…What about Allie?" he asked carefully.

"Oh yeah…I forgot about her. Well, there isn't much to do now, what's done is done."

"I won't let her get away with this, Grizz. She forced you to kill someone against your will. She clearly abused her position."

"I know…"

"And she didn't even bother checking on you after everything. She left you here, starving and blaming yourself for three whole days. I'm not okay being leaded by someone like that."

"Don't be so hard on her, she's still mourning. I know what she did is wrong but I can't do anything about it anymore, right?"

"You should demand that she apologizes at least."

"I'm not the kind of man to hold grudges, Sam. If she reflects on it and feels the need to apologize, she will. I trust her, I'm sure she will come to me when the right time comes."

"You're too soft, Grizz."

"I surely am." he answered, smiling.

"Well, for now, you really should eat something, you're looking thinner by the second. I'll get you something."

"Thanks."

 

When Sam went downstairs, Allie was quietly talking with Will in the kitchen.

"Sam…How is he…?" she asked nervously.

"Oh, so now you care?" he answered coldly.

"Look…I thought about what I did and it was wrong of me to force him to kill Dewey…"

"Damn right it was. But just so you know, the only reason neither I nor Luke is currently yelling some insults at you is because Grizz asked us not to. That doesn't mean I'm not pissed at you anymore." Sam said, preparing a sandwich fo his lover.

"I know…What can I do to make it better now…?"

"You already hurt him, Allie. Are you even aware of what you did? He fucking tried to kill himself because of you."

"Wha…What?!" she said, in unison with Will.

"You heard me right. So, if you don't want me to really kick your ass, you'd better go see him this very second and apologize."

And with that, Allie ran upstairs before knocking on Grizz's door.

"You're back already, Sam?" Grizz called.

"It's…it's me, Allie." she carefully said, not knowing how he would react at her presence.

"Oh…It's you. Well, come in, Allie. What do you want?" he said coldly. Despite what he previously said to Sam, he was really angry at her. She quietly entered the dark bedroom.

" _Grizz…Grizz…_ " she began, tears swelling in her eyes.

"Oh, Allie…Come here, girl." he said, all anger disappearing from his tense features. 

 He had immediately sensed how bad Allie was feeling for doing that to him. She ran into his arms, freely crying now.

"I'm sorry, Grizz…I'm so sorry for hurting you like that ! I don't want you to die, Grizz. I don't want you to die, please don't leave me !"

" _Oh…so, she knows. I guess Sam must have told her to make her feel guilty._ " he thought.

"It's alright, Allie. I'm not gonna die. I'm sorry I did something like that, I really am. It was dumb. I'm not going anywhere." he reassured his sobbing friend.

"I'm so sorry…I'm so sorry !" she cried in his big strong arms. 

"It's fine. I understand how you felt. But please, never force me to do something like that ever again, okay?"

"I won't, I promise ! I won't !"

"Then we're good. Don't cry anymore, Allie. I hate seeing you crying, you know it." he gently hugged her, a warm small smile on his face.

 

From the doorway, Sam watched the two of them with loving eyes.

" _How can he be so kind and caring ? After all he's been through…People betrayed him his whole life and yet, he's still so trusting. Can't believe this amazing man is here, loving me in this crazy world. I'm so lucky…_ "

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm sorry, I couldn't make Grizz hate Allie for too long... Just love their friendship.  
> Grizz is just too forgiving for his own good, he has such a pure heart.
> 
> Love them both <3


	20. The Argument

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sam and Grizz have a disagreement.

Six month later, Grizz couldn't have been happier. He was now completely out with Sam and people - except for Campbell and Harry - were very caring towards them. In fact, it seemed almost everyone had already understood beforehand because of how they were acting towards each other. Sam was the perfect angel of his life. He never had expected him before in his life but it already felt as if they had been together for an eternity. 

Even though he had nightmares about Dewey or his father almost every night, he never had another depressed episode. Sam was still very worried about his health, especially his heart, which made him extra careful. They now gave dance classes together, two times a week, but Grizz didn't really dance at all. He had largely reduced his use of heart medication cause it wouldn't last forever and was now forbidden from any physically tiring activities; dance included. He didn't really mind, he loved to teach classes and would always have Sam to dance for the both of them. The whole dance class was preparing for a Thanksgiving show at the church and had though doubled practice. 

One night, Grizz had one of his recurrent nightmares. 

_This time, he was locked in the car with Logan dangerously leaning over him. He panicked as he felt the water filling the car very quickly. At the moment, Logan was the least of his worries, he would die if he didn't find a way out. Indeed, the car soon filled up completely and he began to suffocate. Desperately searching for breathable air, all his thought went to one person. "Sam…"_

He suddenly woke up, screaming and choking. Sam immediately woke up too, completely focused on his panicked boyfriend. This had happened too many times in the last six month and he was more and more thinking about asking Kelly for some sleeping medication. When he had talked with Grizz about it, he had answered that sleep medicine was dangerous for him, slowing down his heartbeat too much for his weak organ. Sam didn't push the matter, but there had to be a way to make Grizz sleep better at night…

"Grizz? It's okay, love, I'm here. You're fine, it was a dream, just a terrible dream. You're here with me now, you're safe…" he gently whispered, rocking their bodies to a relaxing pace.

It took Grizz a few minutes to calm down.

"Sam, I'm so sorry I always wake you up like that in the middle of the night…" he apologized.

"It's okay, it's not your fault. I'm sorry I can't do anything to make it better though…"

"You're here when I wake up, it's more than enough." he said softly, smiling sadly at his deaf boyfriend.

"What time is it?" he went on. "I don't think I'll be able to go back to sleep anytime soon."

"It's 5 am, Grizz. Just rest a bit more…"

"No, it's okay, _you_ sleep. There's no reason for the both of us to be exhausted today. It's fine, I'll just get changed and head to the hospital, I have to get my new medication."

"New medication ? Are you already out of the old one?" Sam asked, a bit worried.

"No, no. It's just that Kelly changed my dose for the Thanksgiving show so I have to go fetch some more."

" _She what ?!_ Grizz, we talked about this, you can't take this kind of risk."

"Come on, honey, I'll be just fine. Remember I used to be part of the football team, right? I wanna dance with you guys, I wanna be there with you, on the stage, and be proud of our dancers."

"Grizz, it's not worth it. You can already be proud of them, they did a great job. But I can't let you risk your health just to be able to dance with a bunch of idiots." he said, shaking his head.

"They're not _idiots_ , Sam ! They're my friends, and yours too for all I know. This is important to me, honey. Dance has always been one of the only way I had to express how I really felt, back at the time. I need it, Sam. I'm sick of the nightmares, I'm sick of worrying you and everybody every time I wake up screaming. I know this will help me feel better and you know it too. Just one time, let me be just a little foolish and do this." Grizz pleaded his boyfriend.

"I can't, Grizz. I'm sorry but I can't let you do it ! I don't think you really understand the risks you're taking. You could die, for God's sake !"

" _Sam_. I've lived with this weak heart for my whole life. I don't need you to explain to me what may or may not happen, I know ! Trust me, _I know_. But it's worth it ! Plus, with the medication Kelly will give me, there's no reason for me to have a seizure."

"When you were taking this dose regularly, maybe. But now that you don't take much anymore, you don't know how you'll react, Grizz !" he half yelled.

"I still know my body better than you do, Sam ! I know how to take care of myself !" 

"Oh, you know how to take care of yourself, huh ? What about the time I found you with ripped open wrists, Grizz?! Did you also know how to take care of yourself at the time?!" he finally screamed.

"… _I_ …" Grizz couldn't say anything, too shocked by his boyfriend's hurtful words. Sam knew how bad he felt about that and yet…he had had no problem using it against him. Grizz lowered his head, not wanting to show Sam how much he had just hurt him.

Sam was now panting, completely furious. Seeing the hurt night blue emanating from his boyfriend, he immediately regretted his words. He knew it was wrong of him to use this event against Grizz, but he had to make him understand…

"Grizz…I'm just trying to keep you safe. Even if it's against yourself…" he tried to lift his chin up but Grizz backed off. 

"Don't touch me…" he whispered.

"Love, don't be like that…I'm just watching over you, I don't to see you get hurt because of some stupid dance show."

"Enough…" Grizz slowly signed. 

"Come on, Grizz. Let's not be overdramatic over this." he tried to joke.

"I said, enough !" Grizz screamed, turning back to face his deaf lover.

"You've said enough, I get it ! If I'm so much to worry about, then I won't bother you anymore !" he cried. With that Grizz stormed out of their bedroom.

 

The following evening, Grizz didn't come back home. Sam figured he must have slept at Luke's because of their fight. Never before did he feel so alone in the kingsized bed. He couldn't sleep, too worried about his lover.

" _Did he take his medicine? What if he has a nightmare tonight and I'm not here to calm him down? No, he's gonna be fine, Luke's with him. He was already there for him back at the time. But was it this bad back then ? What if he can't ease him enough and Grizz starts hyperventilating? Even this could be really dangerous for his heart right now…_ " he went on and on all night.

With the daylight of the morning, he was surprised to see Luke barging in the living room.

"What the hell did you tell him, Sam ?!" he shouted.

"Wha…What ? What are you talking about?" Sam asked, surprised by his sudden entrance.

"I asked you what you did to him, Sam ! He didn't come to the Guard at all yesterday and when I searched for him, he was nowhere to be found. When I came home this morning after my night shift, there was this note on my fucking bed !" Luke handed a small piece of paper to Sam forcefully.

" _Luke, I'm going out of town for a few days. Don't worry about me, I'm fine. Grizz._ " The paper was a little curly where he could only guess tears had fallen.

" _Oh my God…_ " Sam mumbled. 

"Yeah, you can say that ! What the fuck did you do to him, Sam ?!"

"I…I…We had a fight yesterday morning…"

"I figured so much, thanks, but what exactly did you _tell_ him?!" Luke was beginning to lose patience.

"He wanted to attend the dance show, but I told him it was a bad idea because of his heart. He told me he knew how to take care of himself and I…"

"You _what_ , Sam ?!" Luke pressured him.

"…I told him he hadn't done such a great job at it when he tried to kill himself…" Sam whispered, so ashamed of himself. He suddenly took in how violent this sounded and how bad he must have hurt his lover.

" _What ?!!!_ What the fuck were you thinking ! You know how bad he already feels about this ! And now he's out there, wandering somewhere alone in the woods ! Great job, Sam ! Boyfriend of the year !" Luke shouted.

Sam didn't even comprehend what Luke was throwing at him. He had only one thing in his mind.

" _I have to find him._ " 

When Luke stopped screaming at him, he got upstairs, beginning to pack his things.

" _Please, be safe. Please be safe…_ "

"Where do you think you're going, Sam?" Luke asked, having calmed down a bit.

"I can't stay here and wait for something to happen to him. I'm gonna bring him back."

"No, you're not."

"No, Luke, you don't understand. The woods are not safe, plus we don't even know if he took his medication with him, and…"

"Sam ! Stop !" he yelled, halting Sam's agitated body.

"Now, _you_ listen to _me_." Luke said, threat in his eyes. "Grizz is not some damsel in distress you always have to rescue. He knows his body. He knows his limits. And he doesn't need you to remind him how weak and powerless he is all day long. Right now, he's alone in the woods, God knows where. And that's _fine_. I'm not worried for a bit about him coming back safely, because, come one, it's _Grizz_! He knows what he's doing and those woods have no secrets for him. I understand that you're worried, cause you don't know him as well as I do, but believe me when I tell you that the last thing Grizz needs right now is for you to get lost in the woods searching for him."

"But…but…" Sam whispered, looking straight at Luke's reassuring face.

"It's okay, Sam. Grizz is not the unprepared and ignorant boy you seem to believe he is. If he went to the woods alone, he went prepared. See? He even left me a note, knowing that I would worry if he didn't. He's thoughtful and rarely takes high risks in the end. He'll be back in a day or two and then you can sort everything out with him, alright?" he finished, softly smiling at Sam.

"O…Okay." Sam resigned. "Thank you, Luke."

"You're very welcome. But just so we're clear, if something like that ever happens again, Grizz won't be the one you should worry about." Luke said, the smile disappearing from his features.

"Yeah, I'm sorry I hurt him like that…"

"Don't you ever say something like that to him again, Sam. Cause next time, I won't let it go as easily."

"I know. Sorry." Sam apologized again, looking straight at Luke's intense glare.

"Alright ! So, we're good then !" he suddenly laughed, his gently features softening again.

 

During all this time, Grizz was silently watching the sunrise in the woods. He had found a big open space from where he could clearly see the first rays of sun pouring out. He was thinking about Sam, about their fight, when he heard loud cracking sounds. He immediately got up to his feet, grabbing the little machete he had packed.

"Is there someone out there? Hello ?" he called, still on guard.

The cracking got louder and Grizz slowly began to distinguish some sort of growling. He was breathless when the enormous bear appeared before him. He walked dangerously towards the boy, huge claws threatening to tear him apart in a few seconds. He seemed to be injured on the paw explaining his violent and defensive behavior. 

" _Grizz against Grizz...I'm so fucked up right now._ "

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> We can't really be mad at Sam...He made a huge mistakes that's for sure, but we all do when we're worried sick about the people we love <3  
> Love them both :)


	21. The Woods

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Grizz VS Grizz

" _Okay, stay calm. There's nothing to be afraid of, you have to keep your heartbeat at bay, nobody wants you to have a seizure all alone in the woods. It's just…it's just some fucking bear !_ " Grizz thought.

He tried to take few steps back but the bear was still walking straight to him. Gathering all his knowledge on black bears, suddenly something popped in Grizz's mind.

" _Since when are there any fucking Grizzly in Connecticut ?! We usually see black bears, not grizzly…Oh yeah, we're in some fucking parallel universe._ " he reminded himself.

The bear stopped moving and Grizz tried to take a few other steps back. " _Stay calm. Think of Sam, something relaxing._ " he thought.

He stepped on a huge branch and fell over. " _Fuck!_ "

With that, the huge animal charged at him full force, jumping on him. Grizz didn't try to fight back. He played dead, hoping the bear would soon get tired of him. The animal hit him a few times on the side, rolling him over. 

Grizz managed to hold back pained groans, staying calm and composed. " _It's gonna be alright, it's gonna be over soon…_ " he thought. The bear wasn't the only threat right now. His fragile heart was pounding hard in his chest ; one moment of panic and he would have a seizure. If that happened, it would be over. There was no chance he would survive a grizzly bear attack and a heart crisis at the same time.

" _It's okay, it's okay, stay calm. Don't panic._ " he repeated to himself.

 

After a while, the bear stopped tossing him around and retreated a few meters away. The animal was still too close for Grizz to completely be safe. He saw the bear licking his bloody paw, looking hurt.

The injured boy softly turned on his side. He watched the bear very carefully before trying to sit. It hurt as hell but it was nothing he couldn't take. He eyed the bear, watching his every move. The fluffy threatening animal looked straight at him with strange glare. Grizz froze.

The wounded beast slowly walked to him, limping a bit. He didn't seem as aggressive as before, just really curious now. When he arrived at Grizz's level, he began licking the man's face, stealing a small smile from him. 

"Hey, buddy." he gently whispered. "You really got me scared a few minutes ago, you know." he said, slowly straightening himself.

The grizzly groaned and cuddled a bit in Grizz's neck.

"Oy, you're just looking for a friend in the end, huh? I'm sorry I scared you before…" he still whispered. 

The bear then let out a loud pained growl, beginning to lick his paw again.

"You're injured…Let me take a look." he said, looking straight at the bear's eyes before moving a muscle. When the animal kind of agreed to let him in his personal space, Grizz stretched his small hands. He didn't touch the wound but his hands began to glow. He waited a few seconds for the grizzly to approach him himself. 

"There you go, see? I'm not gonna hurt you. It's gonna make you feel better, come here…"

The bear finally made contact with the boy's glowing hands. He immediately relaxed, feeling his paw healing. 

Grizz couldn't believe he was actually alone, in the woods, healing a wounded grizzly.

" _This is fucking incredible._ " he thought.

He managed to completely heal the bear and removed his hands from the fluffy animal. The growler licked his face one last time before disappearing in the depth of the woods.

"Oh my God…I just survived a grizzly attack…well, fuck!" he exclaimed. Even if the bear was finally gone, he was still injured and began to take in his own state. One of his side was bleeding profusely but nothing seemed broken. 

" _Well, I really was lucky, he could have hurt me really bad._ " he thought.

 

With that, he made his way back to town. Blood was slowly dripping from his torn shirt but he tried to cover it up, not to scare everybody at home. When he reached the forest border, Sam, Luke and Allie were there, quietly talking while waiting for him to return.

"Guys? What are you doing here…?" he called.

"Grizz ? Grizz !" Sam yelled the best he could. Seeing his lover safe and sound, he could have just cried from happiness. He ran over him, hugging him tightly.

Grizz was really happy to see Sam. He had completely forgotten about their previous fight, the very reason he went into the woods. He was just glad to be alive, still amazed by his connection with the fluffy beast.

Luke and Allie also ran up to their level, worry in their eyes.

"Are you alright, dude?" Luke asked, seeing how Grizz was holding his side. He had seen his friend hurt often enough to know when he didn't want to show he was injured.

"Guys, I met a fucking Grizzly !" he exclaimed, a huge smile on his face.

"Ow that's amazing, man! What was it like ?! Did you kick his fluffy ass?" Luke laughed.

"Luke! What the fuck?! Are you okay, how are you still alive, Grizz?!" Allie said.

"Well, he charged at me and scratched me a bit, but I'm mostly fine, don't worry. Luke, you're never gonna believe this. He had an injured paw and I healed him !"

"You what?" Sam asked, eyes wide with amazement.

"That's my man !" Luke giggled, hand shaking his badass buddy.

"It's amazing, I know ! He licked my face and cuddled with me ! Then he showed me his paw and I healed him. He licked me again and just wandered off."

"Are you crazy, Grizz?! You could have died and you just healed him? What's wrong with you?!" Allie said, completely shocked by Luke's lack of logical reaction.

"When I found myself face to face with him, I really thought I was gonna die. But I'm fine in the end, so I don't see what the problem is."

"Well, you don't wanna push your luck, dude. From now on, no more wandering in the woods for you !" Luke said, laughing.

 

"Grizz…I'm sorry…" Sam whispered, gripping Grizz's shirt.

"About what, love?" he answered, smiling to his boyfriend.

"Well…You know, about the fight…"

"Oh, don't worry about it, Sam. When I faced this bear, the only one I could think of was you. I had to stay composed not to have a seizure in the middle of the woods and just thinking of you made me much calmer. It's fine, I know you were just worried about me."

"No, it's not fine, Grizz. What I told you is just unacceptable and I'm gonna do everything in my power to make it up to you."

"Alright, thank you, Sam."

With that, Sam hugged Grizz and squeezed him really hard, so happy to know that they were good now.

"No…Sam, stop, you're hurting me…" Grizz whispered, feeling his side throbbing like hell. But his deaf lover had his head completely buried in the nape of his neck and didn't hear anything. Grizz tried to pull back.

" _Gosh, he's much stronger than he looks…_ " he thought.

"Sam, Sam ! Stop, it hurts…!" he repeated. Still hugging him, Sam didn't move a muscle and Grizz felt thick drops of blood running down his dirty clothes. Luke heard his friend groaning painfully and helped him get away from the loving deaf boy. 

"Wha…What are you doing Luke?" Sam snapped.

"You were hurting him, Sam." he answered, supporting his best friend's weak body.

"What ? Grizz? Grizz, are you okay, love?" Sam asked worriedly.

"I guess it was more than just a few scratches, right, Grizz?" Luke calmly said.

"Yeah…more than a few scratches…" he softly joked, before passing out.

" _Grizz!_ " the three of them shouted in unison.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Weird and short chapter but it was funny to write hahah !


	22. Saving Grizz Intervention

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Grizz lies between life and death.

" _Grizz!_ " they shouted.

Luke grabbed Grizz's limp body before he could touch the ground and gently put him down. 

"Let's see this injury…" he whispered.

He lifted his coat before discovering that the right part of his shirt was now completely drenched in blood.

"Gosh, Grizz, you should have said something earlier…We have to carry him to the hospital, right now. I don't know who much blood he's lost yet but it certainly doesn't look good. Allie, have Kelly meet us at the hospital asap and tell her what happened." Luke instructed.

"Yea…Yeah, ok, Kelly…" she mumbled, grabbing her phone and dialing Kelly's urgency number.

"Alright, Sam, help me get him on my back so that I can carry him. We have to be careful though, try to readjust him so that there's no pressure on his right side."

" _G…Grizz…?_ " Sam whispered, completely shocked and worried about his lifeless bleeding boyfriend.

"Sam ! There's no time to freak out ! I know you're worried but he's gonna be fine as long as you help me get him on my back so we can head to the hospital, okay?!"

"O…okay, I'll help you…"

They maneuvered Grizz on Luke's back, trying to be as careful as possible with his wounded side.

"Gosh, why does he have to be so tall?!" Luke mumbled, beginning to walk towards the town with Grizz.

They walked for what felt like eternity before realizing how far they really were from town.

"We're too far from the hospital…I think we should call someone to come pick us up if we wanna make it in time." Allie said.

"What do you mean, _in time_? In time, before what?" Sam asked with panicked eyes.

"No, nothing." she responded.

"Before _what_ , Allie?!" he lost patience.

"Before he completely bleeds out, Sam. Let's be realistic, Grizz is tough but his injury's pretty deep, plus he just healed a fucking Grizzly. Healing is really exhausting for his body even though he never shows it. That, and his cardiac condition, I don't know how long he's gonna last before his heart gives in…" Luke said.

"But you said he was gonna be fine…" Sam half sobbed.

"Yeah, but I didn't realize how far we were from town…" Luke said with an elusive look.

"Come on, Luke ! You were the one talking sense in me just ten minutes ago, you can't give up like that ! He's gonna be safe, period. I'm calling Becca to come pick us up right now."

"Okay, call her…"

A car rushed in front of them a few minutes later. Becca had never drove so fast in her life, but after half hearing her deaf best friend so desperate on the phone, she knew something bad had happened.

"What happened ? God, Grizz ! Is he gonna be okay ?" she worried.

"Not if we don't hurry our asses up to the hospital." Luke said, carrying Grizz to the car with Sam.

"Thank you for coming so fast, Becca." he signed to her.

"Let's go !" Luke shouted.

 

When they arrived at the hospital, Kelly was waiting with Gordie and Jason. 

"He's here, let's go." she said to Gordie.

"Explain to me exactly what he told you and how he acted before passing out." she then addressed Luke.

"Well, when we saw him, he seemed fine except that he was gripping his side in a weird way. We spoke for a bit about him meeting up with some fucking grizzly in the woods and he was alright. He told us the bear had charged at him and that he had scratched him up a bit but that's all. Then Sam hugged him and he suddenly wasn't feeling well."

"He fought a freaking grizzly?! I knew my boy was a badass!" Jason laughed.

"Hey Jay, what are you doing here?"

"Yo dude, I was just passi…"

"Guys ! Fucking saving Grizz intervention, remember?" Kelly told them, while looking at his injuries.

"Yeah, right…" they said.

"Okay, so he lost a whole lot of blood and I have clearly no idea what his blood type is…I can't even give him a fucking transfusion." she went on.

"But you can save him, right Kelly?" Sam asked nervously.

"Well, besides patching him up, trying to get the bleeding to stop and let him rest, there's nothing much I can do…"

"What about his heart?" Allie said.

"Wha…You know about his heart ? I thought it was supposed to be kind of a secret ?" 

"Luke told me." 

"We really have to stop the bleeding now if we don't want his heart to break down." Gordie said, looking eagerly at Kelly.

"Okay, guys I need you to stay back now and just let us do our job."

"Alright, call us when he's better…" Luke softly said.

Sam kissed him on the forehead before joining the others. 

" _Be safe, sweetheart_." he whispered, half smiling to his unconscious lover.

 

Kelly came back one hour later with bloody gloves.

"Hey guys." she greeted them.

"Kelly, how is he, what happened?" Sam asked with wet eyes. It had been the longest hour of his life.

"So, we managed to stop the bleeding after a while but his body went into shock because of the blood loss. His heart stopped. We performed CPR and his heart restarted but he's still very weak. He has to be on constant watch until his body produces all the blood he needs again."

"God, Grizz…" Jason mumbled. He had stepped as the carefree and not worried dude to cheer the others up during the last hour but was himself really worried about his teammate. 

"Can we see him, now?" Luke asked.

"He's still unconscious but you can see him." Gordie said.

 

They all entered the unconscious boy's room walking on eggs. Nobody dared to speak and placed themselves all around Grizz's bed.

"Hey, love…You really scared us this time. Thank you for not dying on us." Sam whispered, freely crying now. 

Waiting had been awful but seeing Grizz lifeless form and barely breathing on this hospital bed was even worse. 

Nobody wanted to leave the hospital room, all waiting for Grizz to wake up. The atmosphere eased a bit with time and they were now all freely talking around his bed.

"Still can't believe he was attacked by some bear and then healed him. This man clearly has no sense of self preservation." Luke joked.

"I mean, who else than Grizz could have defeated a fucking black bear?" Jason laughed, amazement in his eyes.

"…It was a grizzly, Jay…" 

"Grizz ! You awake, dude ! How are you feeling ?" Luke inquired.

"Where's Sam...? Where's Sam ? He must be worried sick, I need to see Sam…" Grizz repeated.

"Hey calm down, man. He just went out for a bit to get you some water. He'll be back in a second."

"O…Okay…"

"Jay, can you please tell Kelly he's awake ?" Luke asked his friend. "How are you feeling, Grizz?"

"Like crap…My side's hurting as hell but otherwise I'm just a little bit dizzy."

"You ! Next time you bleed out on me like that without even telling how injured you are, I swear, I'll just leave you on the road ! What were you thinking, for God's sake?!"

"I'm sorry Luke, thank you for carrying me here." Grizz said, slowly smiling at his best friend's attempt to tell him how worried he really was.

"You're not getting away with a fucking "I'm sorry, Luke." this time ! When your father beat the crap out of you, you were already like that. Always hiding how really hurt you were ! I understood at the time, cause you didn't want anyone to find out, but he's gone now ! You have no reason to hide it when you're injured, alright ?! When you heal people and it's too much for you, tell us. When you go alone in the woods and end up injured like the idiot you are, tell us ! You're never bothering us, we just want to help and make sure you're safe, okay?"

"Yeah, I know…I know, I'm sorry…" realizing now that he was the one to hurt them by hiding his pain, he suddenly felt really guilty.

"Luke ! How dare you yell like that at a recovering patient ?!" Kelly said.

"How are you feeling Grizz ? Where does it hurt?" Gordie asked. 

"Well, my right side is hurting as hell and I kinda feel uncomfortable in my chest."

"Okay, that must be because of the CPR, don't worry, it should wear off in a few hours."

"You performed CPR ?! Gosh, it was that bad, huh…?"

"Yeah, don't ever try to die on us like that." Sam said, walking in the room softly smiling.

"Sam, love...I'm so sorry…"

"It's alright, Grizz. I'm just glad you're fine now."

"I guess I won't dance at the Thanksgiving show after all…" he joked.

"Don't worry about Thanksgiving, I'll stay here with you." Sam answered.

"Oy I don't want you to do anything dirty in _my_ hospital!" Kelly warned them.

"Too bad, I had handcuffs…" he casted a laughing sexy look at the deaf boy.

"Oh, no, Grizz !" Allie said infuriated.

"You perverted boy !" Luke giggled.

"That's my boy!" Jason laughed.

Everybody ended up laughing, except for Sam who was nervously smiling, deeply blushing and embarrassed. Just imagining what Grizz was implying filled him with happiness.


	23. Thanksgiving Part.1

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Thanksgiving night.

Everybody was preparing for Thanksgiving. They Guard had created a fake football field for their new recruits, cakes were now ready and Helena was helping placing the last tables in the church. Grizz was still at the hospital, recovering from his injury. He already could walk and got up much too often for Sam's liking. 

"Kelly told you to rest, Grizz. Don't force me to put you on bed rest." Sam warned.

"Come on, Sam. Everybody's helping at the church, I can't stay here and do nothing." he gently laughed.

"Yes you can, and you will. Kelly said not to get out of the hospital for now. We don't know how your heart's gonna behave for the next few days and she doesn't have the medical material she needs at the church. I know you don't like it, Grizz. But you nearly died two days ago, please stay still, for me." Sam told him.

"Okay…" he resigned himself.

"Thanks, hon." Sam gently whispered, perking a chaste kiss on his forehead.

"Could you call Luke here though, please?"

"Well, I'm not enough for you already?" Sam laughed.

"That's not it, I've got something to ask him."

"Alright, I'll get him. You stay here, and don't you try to escape this hospital. If you do, I'll find you myself and end you on the spot."

"Will do." he softly signed back.

 

Sam found Luke by the church, helping Helena getting everything ready for the night.

"Hey Luke, could you come to the hospital when you're free? Grizz wanted to ask you something, don't know what though."

"Yeah, I'm finished here anyway. I'll be going, honey, see you in a bit!"

"Bye sweetheart." Helena answered kindly.

"I'll drop by later, Luke. I wanted to see Becca before going back."

"Yeah, alright, see you soon then !"

"See you later." he signed, already spotting his best friend in the crowd.

 

"Grizz? I hope for you you're still in bed, or else you're gonna regret it, young boy…"

"Luke…" Grizz lifted his head up.

He was on the floor, surrounded by a whole bunch of clothes. He looked completely lost and on the verge of crying.

"Grizz? What are you doing on the ground, dude?! Are you okay? Can you stand?" Luke tried to help his friend on his feet.

"No, no I'm not alright. I don't fucking know what to wear for tonight!"

"Wha..?"

"I've always celebrated Thanksgiving at home with my dad. Needless to say, not the most festive atmosphere ever. I have no idea what I should wear!"

"Why do you care, you'll just stay here with Sam. You're gonna cuddle all night, nothing to worry about."

"Luke, you don't understand. This is gonna be my first Thanksgiving with him, I want it to be perfect ! I'm not just gonna wait for him in old ugly pajamas. I want to dress up and pretend not to be stuck in this fucking hospital instead of being celebrating with you all. I'm already blaming myself enough for making Sam stay with him all evening, at least I want to wear something nice."

"Oh…! My boy's trying to be nice and beautiful for his boyfriend !" Luke laughed.

"Come on, man. I really need you right now. I have nothing nice to wear and clearly no sense of fashion! If I'd known I'd be spending the next Thanksgiving with the gorgeous Sam, I would at least have bought something decent."

"Believe me, Sam would rather see you naked than wearing some fancy shirt." he laughed.

"Luke ! I'm being serious here, help me." Grizz scolded him, blushing at the comment.

"Alright, alright. I'm sorry. What about those black pants and a nice sweater ? Something simple."

"Something basic for a common dude, not sure it's gonna do the trick…"

"Believe me, Grizz, you're far from common. You're gorgeous just the way you are. If I hadn't been straight, I'd have hit on you for sure." Luke smiled.

"Thanks, man. So…this dark green turtleneck with the black slacks?"

"Sounds good to me. Don't worry, you're handsome, you're gonna look fantastic in those."

"Thanks, what should I do with my hair though?"

"Just leave them down, it'll be perfect."

"Alright, alright. Then I better get changed before he comes back. Thanks for the help !"

Luke stayed with him, helping him dress up because of his injury. He had seen Grizz undress before him countless times now and knowing he was gay didn't bother him a bit. When he turned around to get his turtleneck, Luke saw his old scars again.

"I asked Gwen to grow me some flowers for Sam, could you put them in this vase, please?"

"Grizz…Did Sam see those already?"

"See what?"

"Your scars…"

"Yeah…he saw them. I didn't want him to, but, you know…Can't hide them forever, I guess."

"Does it still hurt?" Luke said, passing a careful hand on his best friend's back.

"From time to time, but I think it's mostly psychosomatic now. I hate them, they're indelible reminder of my childhood. Pretty happy they're in my back where I can't see them."

"Yeah…I get that. Do you think the bastard woke up in the end, wherever he is with all the others?"

"I don't know. I don't even know if I really want him to wake up. Well, of course, I should want him to cause he's my father, but my life's been so easier since he tried to kill himself…I don't think he would even approve Sam and me being a thing."

"Well fuck him then. He's not here anymore. Don't see, don't care."

"I guess so." Grizz answered, half smiling. 

Luke could see the hurt in his eyes, knowing his father would disapprove the love of his life. Well, there was nothing he could do anymore than to just forget about it.

"I should head back to Helena, I think they're getting started already. Have a great Thanksgiving, Grizz."

"Yeah, see you later. And thank you again for helping me." he smiled to his best friend.

"You're welcome, dude. I got you. Tell Sam I say hello."

"Will do, see you, Luke!"

 

When Luke joined the others, they were already starting to eat the main course. Someone came to him in a hurry.

"Luke, where's Grizz? Couldn't see him all day." the girl asked.

"He's at the hospital. He was injured by a grizzly a few days ago."

"By a grizzly ?! Is he okay, now?" another guy said.

"Yeah, he's gonna be fine but he can't leave the hospital for now."

"Oh…I wished he'd be here for the Thanksgiving show of our the dance class."

"Yeah, he's pretty disappointed too. Told me he wanted make a surprise and dance with you guys but his body can't take it right now."

"Hey ! What about we bring the show to him? That would be awesome, like a flashmob or something."

"Yeah that's a great idea actually ! Let me talk with the others!" the girl answered happily.

"Hum…I'm not sure, he should be resting and bringing so many people…"

"Oh come on, Luke, let the boy have some fun." Helena came to him.

"Alright, but first ask Kelly to be sure it's alright."

"Okay ! Hey, Kelly !" she said, running to the medical officer.

When she agreed, the whole dance class came together to make an announcement.

"Hey, everybody ! First, happy Thanksgiving !" everyone cheered with her.

"So, as you all know, we're supposed to perform a Thanksgiving show tonight but sadly, our main teachers are not here tonight because of some medical issues. We really wanted them to watch the show but Grizz can't go out of the hospital for now, so…we were thinking we could all pay him a visit and perform in the hospital yard. The weather's pretty nice tonight, so what do you think about it?"

"Yeah ! That's a great idea !"

"Let's go !"

"We miss Grizz and Sam, let's go !" everybody shouted randomly.

With that, a large part of the audience followed the dance group to the hospital.

 

Sam had come back half an hour ago and was amazed to see his man all dressed up for him. He felt so lucky to have such a handsome lover. This turtleneck sweater brought out his beautiful green eyes and those slacks were shaping his pretty little sporty ass, not that he'd admit anything to him. They were laughing when people suddenly barged in the tiny hospital room.

"What the fuck?" Sam said, surprised to see their dance students there. 

"Sam, Grizz, could you please come to the hospital yard with us, please. Don't worry, Kelly's okay with it all." a girl said, wildly smiling.

"We have a surprise for you." another guy admitted.

"O…Okay." Grizz said, gently getting out of bed.

He wasn't prepared to see almost the whole town in the hospital yard. They had lightened candles all around the place and were patiently talking, waiting for the couple.

"What…What's going on?" he mumbled.

"Well, you couldn't come to the show tonight, so we assumed we'd bring the show to you !" the girl laughed.

Then the music began and the dancers took Sam by the hand, leading him to the improvised stage.

"What…? No, wait, I'll just stay here with Grizz, you don't need me for the show…"

"Go, Sam. I'll be fine, you have fun with the others, I'll enjoy the show from here." Grizz said, widely smiling at his lover. 

"O…Okay."

The show went well and Sam was just gorgeous. He danced so gracefully, so elegantly. They had talked about how he could dance so well one time and Sam had explained that he saw the music as bright colors and just went along with them, playing with them. It was simply beautiful. 

When the show ended, everybody cheered for them. The crew thanked the audience and their main teacher Grizz. Everyone turned to Grizz, applauding and congratulating him. He couldn't have been more touched and delighted. A small happy tear rolled down his blushing cheeks and he thanked everybody for coming at the hospital for him. It meant so much for the boy.

As people started to eat dessert on the hospital yard's ground, Campbell and Elle arrived. The group hadn't really heard about them for a while now and Sam was just happy that Campbell left him in peace. He walked up to Grizz, Sam and the whole group.

"Well, I see you're the fucking king tonight, Grizz."

"I'm not, Campbell. I just have really really good friends." he answered calmly, smiling at the people surrounding him.

"I guess when the cat is away, the mice dance."

"What do you mean, Campbell?" Will stepped in.

"Well, now that your asshole father's not here to beat the crap out of you, you're kind of the leader now, Grizz, huh?"

" _What?_ " Grizz asked, eyes wide open at him.

"What?! What are you talking about?" Will also answered. 

"Oh, you didn't know? Well, listen up everybody ! Your dear strong and perfect Grizz here hasn't been totally honest with you all. When we were still home, the bastard nearly killed his father because he hit him at home. Not so charming, right?" Campbell laughed.

"…No, that never happened…" Grizz whispered, feeling all the eyes on him.

"Oh, that's not what happened? Didn't your father end up in a coma at the hospital because he "tried to commit suicide" ?"

"Ye…Yeah, but I never…"

"And weren't you with him then?"

"Stop it, Campbell" Sam tried.

"Didn't he hit you on a regular basis, Grizz?" he went on.

"…I…I…" Grizz couldn't talk anymore. How had this perfect moment turned so suddenly into a nightmare?

"Well, one can only assume you got back at him for what he did to you and your whore mother. Not that I blame you for trying to kill the asshole though, but don't start acting all popular and nice, you freak." Campbell finished, widely smiling.

Everybody was now watching Grizz, whispering little comments.

" _Did he really try to kill his father…?_ "

" _His dad hit him when he was young? What a bastard…_ "

" _Do you think he also killed his mother?_ " 

" _Can't believe I never noticed he was a beaten child…_ "

"S…Stop, please stop…" Grizz sobbed. He couldn't stand all the negative feelings directed towards him. He felt ashamed and exposed and tried to justify himself.

"No…I, I never wanted to…" 

"Trying to say something, Grizz? Speak up, everybody's listening." Campbell knew his weakness was large stressed crowds and did a great job at exploiting it to hurt him.

"No…No, I can't…" And with that, he ran out of the hospital. He knew he wasn't supposed to, but he couldn't stay there for another second. He heard Sam calling after him but didn't stop. He ran away to Allie's place.

" _This is a nightmare, this has to be a fucking nightmare…_ " he thought, crying on his way back home.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Bastard Campbell's back...
> 
> PS :Thank you AlwaysInWonderland87 for the dark green turtleneck inspiration ;)


	24. Thanksgiving Part.2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> End of the Thanksgiving night.

"Stop it!" Sam snapped at the agitated crowd. He tried to make his broken voice heard so that everybody would listen to him.

"Aren't you ashamed of yourself, all of you?! Yes, Grizz had some issues during his childhood, but he's no murderer! You all know him, you know how kind a generous he is, he would never do something like that!" Sam yelled.

"He's right, Grizz would never! Now that you all know, I can tell you the truth. Yes, Logan fucking Visser hit his child when he was young and he was a real bastard. He lost all the money and tried to kill himself. Grizz never wanted that to happen! The asshole just took him in his madness and almost killed him. Grizz ended up alright but Logan fell in a coma. That's what really happened, I was there with him, I know." Luke said.

"And you know what? He still loves his father. After everything this fucking bastard did to him, he never really hated him. He blamed himself for so long about what happened, and still does, but he always loved Logan, despite everything." he went on.

"And you all are here, judging him, blaming him. I thought Grizz was your friend! He's doing everything he can for this town. He heals you, protects you, reassures you! But you, ungrateful brats, just pressured and hurt him. I'm going to see him now, and when I come back, you better review your behavior." Sam finished, furious.

Everybody was looking at him with wide eyes. Some people had their head down in an ashamed way, some other now cried, sad for what had happened to their friend and how they hurt him. As Sam was making his way to the exit, Luke stepped in front of Campbell.

"And you, my friend, are gonna leave Grizz the fuck alone. I don't know why you said all this crap but believe me, next time, we won't let you get away with something like that." he said. Jason and Clark surrounded him, showing their unspoken agreement.

"Whoever hurts Grizz will have to face the Guard. And we certainly are not joking with this. Really not." he threatened.

"Yeah, you try to even think about hurting him another time and we'll come back at you full force, bastard." Jason interrupted. 

"Oh…So, I see. The little princess has her bodyguards now, interesting. And what are you gonna do if I don't fucking care?"

"Oh don't worry, we surely can be imaginative." it was now Clark's turn.

"I'm not afraid of you jerks. I'll do whatever I want to your faggot princess and there won't be anyone to stop me when the time comes. I have unsettled business with him and I don't plan on laying back like a nice doggy."

"I can't believe it...You know, Grizz never resented you for trying to choke him against a wall. When Allie asked him to tell us your past, he refused categorically, saying he wouldn't betray you. I see you weren't even worth it in the end." Luke added.

"I don't care about him trying to be nice, Luke. I'll destroy him for invading my mind like that. See you, losers!"

They let him go, there was nothing to do for now.

"What are you all looking at, huh?" Jason dispersed the crowd. Everybody went back to their little chat, thinking about how they could apologize to Grizz.

 

Sam arrived at Allie's place and went straight for the bedroom. He saw dark colors under the door, reminding him of the time he had found Grizz hurting himself.

"Grizz…? I know you're here, let me in, please." he gently said, knocking on the closed door.

The door gently opened, revealing a hurt and teary Grizz.

"Sam, I'm so sorry I ran away like that. I know I shouldn't be out of the hospital but…"

Sam didn't give him time to finish his sentence and hugged him tightly.

"Grizz, you have nothing to apologize for. I'm so sorry about Campbell, about people. They don't deserve your kindness, they don't deserve you." he softly whispered.

"It's alright, I don't resent them. Anyone would have had this reaction after hearing such revelations. It's okay, I'm not mad at them, I just couldn't stand all the attention. As for Campbell…"

"Oh, don't try to find him some lame excuse, Grizz." Sam said, looking up at him.

"I won't. The bastard really hurt me, and for no reason. I know he didn't like it when I saw his past, but it's no reason to just spread lies about my childhood. I swear, I'll get revenge on him."

"I'm sure you will, the Guard and I will help you." Sam said, now smiling.

"No, I'm sorry Sam, but I can't have you help me. I'm not worried about Luke and the others but I can't ask you to go against your brother."

"Grizz, you won't exclude me from this. I hate him already, nothing new here, and there's no way I'm gonna let you face him on your own."

"He's your family, Sam. Your only family."

"No, love, _you_ are. _You_ 're my family, my everything. Campbell means nothing to me, he's a stranger at most."

"Sam. Listen to me, honey. Family is everything. Family will always have your back. Trust me, as someone who's lost everything because of hatred, family is what matters the most in the end. Of course, you and me are bound for life by love, but your friends, your acquaintances, they'll slowly disappear one day and the only one who'll always be there for you is your brother, Campbell. I know you two have issues and that he's nothing like the rest of us, but you can't hate him. For me, who's never really had a caring family, please Sam, don't hate him."

"Grizz…"

"Plus, I know what he's capable of and I don't want you anywhere near him for the moment. I can't let him hurt you, Sam. I won't let you stand against him, no way, he's much too dangerous."

"And you think _I_ , on the other hand, am okay to let you stand against him? Have you lost your mind? There's no way I'll let him do anything to you again, Grizz."

"I'll be fine, I'm not planning on just going wild on him and hit him or something. I'll plan everything, take my time. Plus, you don't have to worry about me, Luke and the guys have my back."

"Yeah…But please be extra careful. I almost lost you not so long ago." Sam begged.

"Of course, I will. Now come here." he said, hugging the deaf boy.

Sam enjoyed the warm embrace before seeing something on the ground, pictures?

"Grizz? What are those pictures on the floor?" he asked.

"Oh, nothing. It's nothing." Grizz panicked, rushing to the ground to get them all together and hide them.

"Show me, love." Sam said gently.

"It's nothing interesting, just some old pictures of me when I was a kid."

"I definitely have to see those, then." he laughed.

"Okay…here you go." he handed the pictures to him and settled on the bed with his lover. 

Sam watched them carefully, smiling widely.

"Oh, you were so cute, Grizz!"

"I'm not anymore, huh?" he laughed.

"No, now you're H-A-N-D-S-O-M-E." he laughed too, perking a kiss on the other boy's lips at each syllable.

"Yeah, I'm letting it go, just this time." he joked.

"Grizz, is that your mother?" he asked, eyes wide on the picture of the young beautiful woman with the small cute kid.

"Yeah it's her. She was really beautiful, right?"

"Holly fuck, yeah. She's a real beauty. What's her name?" he asked, curious to know more about the woman Grizz never talked about.

"Ellen. Her name was Ellen, it means bright shining light. It really suited her, she was like the sun." he explained, melancholy in his green eyes.

"That's a beautiful name. She seems so kind and caring."

"She was. If anyone bothered me at school, she would get really mad at the kid, it was so funny. One day, I told her I liked cookies and she baked some for me after school for a whole month." he said, now laughing softly at the memory.

"It was such happy times. She was so nice, generous, you know. At Thanksgiving, it was never only the three of us, she would always pick some random family in the street to come celebrate with us." he smiled.

For the past minute, Sam couldn't take his eyes away from the beautiful melancholic man next to him. If his mother was lovely, Grizz was simply gorgeous. The bright light in his green eyes, the way he smiled, the way he moved. Everything about the young man was absolutely breathtaking.

"You have her bright smile, you know?" he told him.

"I do? Well, thank you." he said, blushing. "My father always told me we really looked alike. I guess that's why it was so hard for him to accept her death, I always reminded him of her."

"Well, you should be proud to look like her. She's a wonderful strong woman."

"In fact, I do. Even if my dad beat me because of it, I've always been kind of proud to resemble her." he confessed, a wide grin on his face.

"I wish she could have met you. She'd have loved you, I'm sure!"

"I wish I had too." he softly answered, smiling at his lover.

 

Grizz suddenly heard some rocks at his window.

"What the fuck…?" he said, getting out of the bed.

He opened his window and saw more than sixty people in Allie's garden. He didn't have time to say anything when three girls lifted a sign with "Grizz," written on it.

Then two other people lifted their own sign and there was a sort of chain reaction of lifted signs. Grizz didn't understand anything at first but then he tried to read it in one shot.

"GRIZZ,"

"WE"

"ARE"

"SO"

"SORRY !"

"WILL"

"YOU"

"FORGIVE"

"US"

"PLEAAAASE ?"

Grizz felt a wide smile spreading on his face. He laughed gently before answering.

"Yeah, of course, guys, I forgive you!" he exclaimed, joy in his eyes.

With that, everybody exploded in cheering and joyful exclamations. They invaded Allie's house and finished this weird Thanksgiving laughing and joking inside. Sam didn't let Grizz go from his arm for a second and sticked with him all night, glaring at anyone who tried to say even one word about his father. Jason, Clark and Luke joined them in the living room and started a food fight with the rest of the desserts. Soon enough, everybody was covered in cake and whipped cream.

Grizz was laughing so hard, completely drenched in chocolate sauce from head to toes.

" _Best Thanksgiving ever!_ " he thought.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Got the idea of the signs from the wonderful AlwaysInWonderlan97 and her pomposal chapter ❤  
> Thanks, dude !


	25. Exploring

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Everything's finally back to normal, what awaits the cute couple, though ?
> 
> WARNING This chapter contains smut (nothing too explicit though), beware

A month had passed since Thanksgiving and everything was finally back to normal. Grizz was now completely healed from his bear injury and the word had passed all around town that he had fought a grizzly. Even if people found it kinda amazing and heroic, he took the matter very seriously.

"Allie, we can't have anyone wander in the woods without proper training. We don't know what to expect in the forest anymore. This time it was a bear and I was really lucky, but it could be any wild dangerous animal. Grizzly are normally not even here in Connecticut, what will happen if we come face to face with a wolf or something like that, next time?"

"Yeah, I know, Grizz. We have to be more careful from now on." she answered.

"Do you think you could give self-defense courses or something like that to prepare the ones who'll go into the woods for farming?" Will asked.

"Well, I think Luke and I could teach them a few things about survival basis but they shouldn't go there without us."

"I know, but you can't go to the woods yourself, Grizz. We don't know what could happen and with your heart, you can't take the risk to have to handle dangerous situations." Allie added.

"Maybe not right now, but when I'm completely fine again, I could take medication and…"

"That's a no, Grizz, period." Will interrupted.

"Alright, but who then? You know, Grizz and I can't always be here for everything a tiny bit dangerous . We can't work with the Guard, the medical center, give self defense classes, arrest people and go to the woods. We have to find durable solutions. We're not numerous enough." Luke said.

"We could maybe go on a recon mission just the two of us in the woods. We both know how to handle wild situations and this way, we won't have to worry about keeping the others safe during the trip. We can try to cartography the forest and list animal life."

"No you can't. Remember what the drone recorded? These woods are extremely dense and even with drones we couldn't find the end. This would take forever." Gordie spoke up.

 

While the group was trying to find solutions to their woods problem, Sam took Becca aside to talk to her privately.

"Is there something wrong, Sam?" she signed to her best friend.

"No, it's not really a problem, Bec. It's just that something's been bothering me for a while now…It's about Grizz." the deaf boy started.

"What about him? If you tell me you're still worried about his health, Sam…"

"No. It's not about this. It's something more…private."

"What is it?"

"Well, you know, Grizz and I kinda live together now, right?"

"Yeah, I know, I'm happy for you guys."

"Thanks. It's just, we never really…you know…"

"I don't understand, Sam. What are you trying to tell me?"

"We never did anything…sexual."

" _What?!_ " she almost shouted.

"Don't be like that, they'll hear us!" Sam blushed.

"Wait, it's been like what, eight month now that you're together, and you've done nothing… _nothing_!"

"Well, aside from kissing, no."

"Oh my God, Sam. How are you holding back? Grizz is gorgeous, I don't understand how you never did anything."

"Please stop fantasizing over my boyfriend, will you?"

"Yeah, sorry. But, how come you never…?"

"I don't know, there's been so much on our mind for those eight month, we never really thought about it…"

"I see. And what about now?"

"That's the problem…I'm starting to feel like it's the right moment, you know, with everything settling down, Grizz being out of the hospital."

"What's stopping you now, then?"

"It's just I never...you know. And I don't know how to discuss it with him without looking like a freaking pervert."

"Sam. Grizz loves you and you're really beautiful and sexy, I'm sure he also thinks about those things, there's nothing to be worry about. You're both young and healthy, it's normal to think of sex."

"I don't know...Do you think I should first talk with him about it or just...you know, make the first move?"

"Well, you know him better than I do but I don't think you should try to see it as something logical and rational. Those things are mostly instinctive. When you feel like it, you should try to make a move on him and he'll just tell you if he feels uncomfortable about it all."

"Yeah...I don't want him to reject me though."

"He never will, I'm sure of it. You love each other, physical pleasure is just another part of your love."

"Okay…Thanks, Becca!" he told her, smiling widely while looking at his handsome man.

"You're very welcome, honey. Keep me updated." she winked at him.

 

The next evening, the couple was quietly talking in their bed.

"So, Allie thought it would be best to just train someone from the guard to lead farming missions for now. I'm not sure who to pick though…Sam? Are you listening to me, love?"

"Hum, yeah, yeah I'm listening."

"We can sleep if you're tired, you know." he gently signed to him, smiling.

"No, I'm not. It's okay, go on."

But he couldn't focus on what his lover was telling him anymore. The only thing that caught his attention was Grizz's hot, wet lips. He gently and lovingly passed a hand on his bare pecs, while drawing kisses on his manly torso.

"Um, Sam? Is something bothering you? You're acting a little weird." Grizz smiled.

"No, no, everything's fine, everything is perfectly fine. I feel so good with you, I just want to...press you hard against me." he said in a sexy way.

"Grizz hugged him innocently and stopped talking momentarily. Sam didn't stop there, grabbed his mouth and kissed him languorously and sensually.

"I see that someone's having dirty thoughts here." Grizz laughed.

"Always when I think of you, Grizz."

They continued to kiss before Sam took the initiative and moved in a saddled position over the young man. Envious hands wandered all over their bodies, getting warmer and hotter.

Sam was no longer afraid. " _Becca was right, it's instinctive..._ " he thought.

He began to slowly lift Grizz's t-shirt, his cheeks reddening with envy. He passed his hands under his shirt and began to kiss him lovingly in the hollow of his neck. A moan of pleasure escaped Grizz's hoarse voice.

"Oh...I see we like it here.

"Sam... Sam..."

"Just enjoy, sweetheart, I love you so much."

"I love you, too, Sam."

They stayed long minutes hugging and kissing languorously before Sam sensed a hot feeling appear at the bottom of his belly.

"I want you so much, darling," he whispered in Grizz's ear.

"Me too, honey. Me too."

Sam was so happy at the time. He felt like he was merging with his second half. But he needed more. He wanted so much more from Grizz.

He then gently passed his hand on the inside of Grizz's thigh, about to explode with desire. Grizz released yet another little noise of contentment, which encouraged Sam to continue the meticulous study of his lover's beautiful body.

Grizz couldn't think any more. He felt his desire growing even more, feeling Sam's body pressed against his.

Sam pulled a little on the elastic of his lover's underwear, waiting for the slightest reaction from the young man. He seemed to enjoy it as much as he did, so he continued to make him languish under his delicate touch. His skin was slightly darker than his, glowing under the shivering light of a candle on the bedside table.

Without warning, he grabbed forcefully his lover's thighs, flipping him on the bed. Nothing could stop him now.

He didn't know where this little game would lead them but he couldn't wait any longer. He snapped Grizz's underwear and dropped his kisses lower and lower on his body.

Suddenly, he felt his lover's body stiffen. Every muscle in Grizz's back tensed. The deaf young man didn't stop despite the unheard complaints of his lover.

"No...No, please stop..." he whispered, unaware that his boyfriend couldn't hear him at all.

"Please, not that...Sam, stop !" he shouted, pulling his now shaking body out of Sam's loving grip.

"Grizz?" he shot his head up, looking deeply into his beloved one's eyes.

What he found in them was pure fright. Looking desperate and panicked, Grizz closed his eyes, still pleading him to stop.

"Grizz? What is it, love?" he gently inquired.

Sam understood what he had just done when Grizz was startled at his touch.

" _Oh my God, I went too far…_ " he thought.

Grizz curled on himself, beginning to hyperventilate. He was somewhere lost between reality and some forgotten memories. Flashes of his father flipping him violently on a tiny bed rushed back in the front of his eyes and he began to scream.

"Grizz, Grizz, I'm sorry! I didn't mean to scare you like that. It's okay, it's okay now." He didn't know what to do to calm his trembling panicked boyfriend.

"No…No please, not that…please, dad" the frightened boy repeated, hiding further in the bed.

"It's me, Grizz. It's me, Sam. I'm here, I won't hurt you, I promise." he tried to lay a hand at him but his boyfriend tensed even more.

" _God, what do I do, what do I do?!_ "

He decided that trying to get Grizz to calm down forcefully would just aggravate his lover's panicked state. He got out of bed, giving him the space he needed to feel comfortable and safe again. Sam knelt at the bedside, approaching slowly his face and hands near the abused boy's contorted features. He whispered sweet reassuring words until he calmed down and stopped shaking. Grateful Grizz had finally stopped hyperventilating, he tried to take his hand in his.

"It's me, Grizz. It's Sam." he tried to say, as gently as possible.

He saw his look returning to its normal warm gaze instead of those awful blank terrified eyes. Grizz was slowly coming back to reality and hated himself for breaking into such a pathetic state.

"I...I'm sorry, Sam. I'm so sorry..." he sobbed, trying to hide his face.

"Please, don't. Don't hide from me. There's nothing to be ashamed of, honey. It was my fault, I should never have gotten so far without checking on you, I'm sorry Grizz."

"No...No, you were amazing, love. it's me, I'm dysfunctional, I can't even have sex with my boyfriend without freaking out..."

"Grizz. You're absolutely not dysfunctional. It's normal to react like that after everything you've been through. We'll just go slowly, don't worry. I won't give up on you just because of this. I love you and we'll sort this out, together."

"O...Okay...Thank you, Sam."

"Don't worry about it, honey. I love you so much."

"I love you too." he whispered, before falling into an exhausted sleep.

_"Well...That didn't go exactly as planned..._ " Sam thought sadly to himself.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know it's a dark chapter but it was to be expected given Grizz's past towards smut...  
> Hope you still liked it though <3


	26. Revelations

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Luke and Becca are here for them, but will it be enough?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> During the violin scene, I had the main tune from "Schindler's list" in mind.  
> If you wanna get in the mood, listen to it while reading this chapter ;)

"How did it go?" Becca asked  eagerly.

"Well…" Sam mumbled.

"Is he a good catch? Oh my God, did he do you or did you do him?" she laughed.

"Becca. We didn't do anything. Well, we sort of did things but we couldn't go all the way…"

"Why? Ok, I know you're his first but…"

"He freaked out. I went too far, too fast and ended up hurting him."

"Oh, so you did go all the way." she winked at him.

"No, no we didn't." He hadn't thought about the fact that she didn't know everything his father had put his boyfriend through.

"But…"

"Look, you don't know everything…Logan didn't just hit him when he was younger."

"What do you mean…? Oh my God, are you saying what I think you're saying?" she answered with wide shocked eyes.

"Yeah, that's exactly what I mean. I was an asshole and I went too far…I was so envious, I didn't think about what he was feeling…I'm really the worst boyfriend ever."

"No, you're not. It's fine, Sam."

"It's not fine, Becca. You weren't there, you didn't see how frightened he was…He kinda broke down, thinking I was his father trying to hurt him…"

"Sam, I'm so sorry."

"I don't know what to do though…He obviously wanted to do it as much as I did but I'm not gonna risk hurting him again like that."

"Take it slow. I think you should maybe discuss it with him and next time, be extra aware of his feelings." she tried to cheer him up.

"Yeah…"

 

 <https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XNSsv86lsok>

During this time, a pained pure violin sound could be heard coming from an uninhabited house.

"Could recognize this sound among thousands." Luke softly said, entering his best friends childhood home.

"Hey Luke." Grizz said, putting his old violin down.

"It's been so long since I've been in your house."

"Yeah, me too."

"What's wrong, Grizz? Every time I hear you play the violin like that, something bad happened."

"Nothing…" he tried to hide his sad eyes.

"Come on, dude, I know you. You coming here, playing all alone, something's definitely wrong."

"I'm fine."

"Is it your heart? Or maybe something happened with Sam?"

"Well…" He didn't really know if he should confide in his best friend. He had never told him about what his father really did to him and wasn't sure he wanted him to know.

"Grizz, I'm here for you, man. You know that. Whatever happened, I'm never gonna judge or resent you. Just tell me." he gently patted his fluffy hair.

"…Last night, Sam and I we...you know."

"Oh…It wasn't great? I thought you had already done it with him already."

"No, it was the first time. It was great though, but…"

"But?"

"We couldn't really do it in the end, I kinda panicked halfway."

"It's okay to panic, it was your first time with a man, can be scary."

"Well, I wasn't scared of doing it with him. It's more like…bad memories came back in my mind."

"Bad memories?"

"Yeah…It reminded me of Logan…" he said carefully. He didn't want to name it, not to Luke.

"Wha…Grizz, you don't mean…"

"Yeah. I'm sorry I never told you, but I was so ashamed and we were so young…We didn't know what sex actually meant and I didn't want you to get the wrong opinion on it because of me."

Grizz was suddenly pushed into a deep hug. He felt Luke boiling in his arms, anger and sadness shaking his whole body.

"Grizz…Grizz, I'm so sorry he did that to you." Luke whispered, half sobbing for his friend.

"I'm so sorry I wasn't there to protect you from him. You shouldn't have had to go through this on your own, I'm so sorry."

"Luke, it's fine, it's not your fault. You wouldn't have been able to do anything, nobody could have."

"Still, I'm so sorry."

"Thanks…"

They stayed like that for a few minutes, mourning their lost childhood together. When they pulled out, Luke spoke first.

"So, when Sam tried to…"

"Yeah, I totally freaked out. I don't know what to do…I really wanted it, him. I still do, but now I'm not sure I ever will be able to."

"It'll be fine. You should talk to him, take it slow. When you try again, relax and go past this, step by step. You probably won't be able to go all the way at first, but with time, I'm sure you'll make it through."

"I don't want to make him suffer, Luke. He already feels so bad for what happened yesterday, I don't want him to go through all this traumatized boyfriend thing…I just want him to be happy, with someone that can satisfy him, on every level."

"This person is you, Grizz. You're the only one for him, he loves you. There's no way he's gonna give up on you just because you need a little more time to adjust."

"But…"

"No buts, dude. You already make him so happy, it's gonna be fine."

"Thanks, Luke."

"Anytime. You wanna stay here a bit longer or do you wanna come with me for lunch?"

"I think I'll stay here just a little while longer. It feels good to play again, away from all the noise in town."

"I get it. Don't stay too long though, I don't like this house and what it means for you…Is it a new violin? Never saw you play on that one."

"It was my mother's. Don't worry, I'll be back before the Guard's meeting."

"Alright, see you then. And don't think too much about yesterday, you're gonna sort this out with Sam."

"Yeah, thank you, see you later." he smiled to his friend.

 

When Grizz began to feel his fingers going numb on the violin, he made his way back in town. On the road, he was extremely surprised to find Becca, bent over a bush, puking her guts out. He ran to her, worried about his friend.

"Becca? Are you okay?"

"Huh…Grizz? What are you doing here?"

He helped her on her feet, laying one hand on her back and the other on her hip. He felt a jolt of electricity coursing through his whole body. Suddenly he sensed Becca's energy but…not only hers.

"Be…Becca? Are you maybe…pregnant?"

"Wha…What?! I don't know what you're talking about" she said, trying to get away from his firm grip.

"It's okay, I don't judge you. It's just, with my power, you know…"

"Ow…You felt it…?"

"Yeah, kinda. I'm sorry."

"You, you felt my…baby?" she said, warm motherly eyes lightening up.

"Yes, yes I did, it's incredible Becca !" he smiled.

"Do you wanna talk about it, maybe?"

And with that, they headed to the first house nearby, his own.

"So…When did you find out about your pregnancy?"

"About three months now. I can't believe you felt it, I'm so glad my baby's alive in there." she said, looking lovingly at her belly. It didn't really show yet but Grizz could distinguish a little bump now that he took a close look.

"And…who's the father..?" he asked her carefully.

"I…I can't tell you…"

She thought about it for a second. " _Well, Grizz also have some dark history on this matter…Maybe I could tell him…_ "

"It's okay if you don't wanna tell me, I totally under…"

"It's was Kelly's father." she said.

"Kelly…our Kelly? You had an affair with Kelly's father?" he said, without a hint of judgment.

"Well, not really. I didn't really have a say in it…" she confessed, tears building up in her eyes.

"Oh…Becca, I'm so sorry."

"It's okay…Now the baby's here and I just have to go on with it."

"Yeah…I'm sure it will be a beautiful baby, cause it's yours."

"Thank you Grizz."

"But, hum…I thought you didn't want me know just a minute ago." he asked her, completely lost.

"Yeah, but, hum, I figured that you of all people would understand."

"Me? Hum, sorry to ask but why should I understand better than the others…?" he didn't like what she had just implied.

"You know…Given your history…with your dad."

"My…What?! How do you know about this?!" he almost shouted, confusion and shame in his eyes.

"Well, Sam told me about it…"

Grizz stood there, completely shocked. Nothing came out of his mouth, he couldn't believe it. How could Sam do this to him? How dared he tell the young mother his deepest secrets?!

He ran away, determined to find Sam and have him explain.

"Grizz? Grizz! I'm sorry, I didn't mean to hurt you!" she called after him, but he was already gone.

 

"You! Upstairs, now!" he barged into the living room. 

Sam didn't expect this sudden intrusion in the quiet living room and gave a puzzled look at Allie before following his boyfriend to their bedroom.

"How could you?!" Grizz shouted when they were alone.

"How could I what, love?" he asked, completely lost. Why was Grizz so upset? Did something happen?

"How could you tell Becca about what my father did?!"

"Grizz…" he tried. " _Oh fuck…This is gonna be bad_." he thought.

"I didn't even tell Luke about it and at the first occasion, you tell her?! What were you thinking, Sam?!"

"Grizz, I'm sorry I told her. It's just…after yesterday, I was kinda lost and I couldn't explain your panic attack without telling her about Logan."

"So I freak out on time and you go on telling everybody about it?! Did you even think about me?! How ashamed I would be !" he couldn't calm himself.

"There's nothing to be ashamed of, honey. She didn't judge or blame you."

"That's not the point, Sam! How could you do this without telling me about it?! Didn't you think that maybe I wouldn't be okay with her knowing?!"

"I…I'm sorry, Grizz. I didnt' mean to hurt you or go behind your back. I was lost and I just needed her advices on the matter."

"Oh, you needed her advices? You didn't even talk to me before! You didn't even try to sort this out with me before going to her and telling her about my dad!"

"Please, calm down, love. No harm here, it's just Becca, I trust her."

"And what about my consent, Sam?! You didn't even think about me trusting her or not. There's no harm? Oh yeah, I'm really excited to know that the whole town will soon know I was raped, great news!"

"Becca would never do that, you know it. Look, I'm sorry I didn't ask you before, okay? Just calm down, it's not good for your heart." Sam tried again.

"I don't fucking care about my heart right now ! And I'm not gonna fucking calm down! This is serious, Sam."

"You're overreacting, Grizz, like you always do. This is not the end of the world. I needed a friend to talk to and you weren't here. You went who knows where to play your fucking violin and left me here, alone."

"I'm sorry, but I needed some time alone! How can you not respect that?!"

"Well, I respect that but not after what happened yesterday!"

"And you couldn't wait just a few hours?! I didn't run away from the matter, I just wanted some fucking time to pull myself together. I wanted to talk to you when I came back but you obviously have found someone else to talk to!"

"Oh don't get all jealous because I confided in my best friend, you're the one always head over heels with Luke!"

"Confide in her, no problem, but you didn't have to tell her everything about me!"

"Don't be so dramatic, it's not that of a big deal." 

"Get out."

"What? Grizz, come on."

" _Get out !_ "

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hate to have them arguing but they'll get stronger out of this :)
> 
> Thank you AlwaysInWonderland87 for helping me figuring Becca's pregnancy pitch ! Great co-writer ;)


	27. Appeasement

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Words are exchanged, tears are flowing.

"I warned you, Sam." Luke said, before punching Sam straight in the face.

"Are you crazy?!" Becca shouted.

Sam pulled himself together, standing up with a bloody nose.

"What's your fucking problem, Luke?" he half signed half said.

"I warned you that next time you hurt Grizz, I wouldn't go easy on you." he answered, killing him with his glare.

"That's not my fault if your little princess is being overly dramatic." he snapped.

"My _what_?! Are you fucking hearing yourself, Sam?! How dare you speak about Grizz like that?! You sound just like Campbell!"

"Yeah, well maybe he was right. Him being all fragile and shit, I'm sick of it! I always have to think about his feelings, his health, his past. I'm not some fucking shrink!"

"I thought you loved him…" Luke said, looking at him sadly, feeling betrayed for his friend.

"Well, I'm not so sure about it now."

"What are you saying? Of course, you love him!" Becca intervened. 

"Oh, so you know better, right? I'm sick of this, of him, of all the drama! If I had known at the time that it would be like that…"

"If you had known it would be like that _what_ , Sam?! You would have given up on him much sooner?!"

"Oh, shut up, Becca! It's because of you that we're at this point!"

"What do you mean? What did I do, now?"

"You just had to report to him that I had told you about Logan, huh? If you had just shut your big mouth, he wouldn't be god knows where, probably slighting his wrists again!"

"She didn't do anything, you did!" Luke stepped in.

"Why shouldn't he know you told me, anyway? He was okay with you telling me, right?"

"Well the bastard didn't even bother asking him about that, right Sam?!" Luke couldn't stand the deaf boy anymore.

"If I had asked him about it I'm sure he'd have said no."

" _You what?!_ Did you tell me without asking him first?!"

"Oh don't start you too."

"What the fuck, Sam?! What were you thinking! Of course he would be upset!"

"Well, I don't give a shit anymore."

"You're not getting away with this."

"Oh and what do you plan on doing to me, Luke? Arrest and execute me for hurting your little protégé? Or maybe beat the crap out of me? You know Grizz would never forgive you."

"Don't you care for him at all? Just because it's not all rainbows and butterflies, you turn your back on him? I didn't take you for this kind of guy, man." Luke answered sadly.

"He's right, Sam. That's not who you are. The Sam I know loves Grizz and would do anything for him."

"Yeah, well maybe there's too much to be done." he answered, coldly.

"You know what? There's no point in this discussion. We'll just let you calm down for now and maybe when you realize how big you fucked up, we'll come find your sorry ass again."

Becca took Luke's hand and left the house with the quarterback.

"Becca, I have to go back in and make him understand that nobody messes up with Grizz!"

"No you don't. What you need to do right now is to find Grizz and make sure he's alright. Do you know where he went?"

"Yeah, he went back to his childhood home. I hate seeing him there though, with his past and all…"

"Go see him. I'll handle Sam when he's back to his fucking right mind."

"Alright, I'll check on him after my shift at the Guard tonight. Keep me updated."

"Of course."

 

Back at home, Grizz couldn't stop his tears from falling. Sam's words resonated in his mind and there was nothing he could do to calm himself. He wanted so badly to run at Allie's house and tell him how sorry he was to have yelled at him like that. He didn't know how to function without him anymore, it was as if suffocating in a wide open space. 

Not knowing what to do with himself, he picked his mother's violin again and tried to lose his suffering in the sheer sound of the beautiful instrument. Luke was right, every time he felt lost or at the verge of breaking, he always played. It was the only way for him to feel better. 

He was glad to be off duty and played all day, not even bothering to eat. When the sun went down, anxiety rose in him. Being alone in his former home at night brought up really bad memories.

" _I can't stay here…_ " he thought.  

But what choice did he really have? Sam was at Allie's place and Luke was on duty for the night. The forest was out of question, of course. So he retreated to his old bed, a knot in his stomach. For a while he laid there, staring at the ceiling, his argument with Sam replaying in his mind. He ultimately gave in to sleep but his tortured mind had better plans for the night.

_In his nightmare, he could distinguish Logan's naked body over his. Lifting his head up slowly, he didn't recognize his father's features._

_"S…Sam…?" his trembling body was about to relax at the sight of his beloved boyfriend when he suddenly felt a sharp pain coming from his middle-section._

_"Sam, stop! Please, stop, you're hurting me!"_

_But the fake boyfriend didn't bulge and went on with his torture. He looked straight into Grizz's eyes, a wide perverted smile growing on his face._

_"No! Please, stop! Sam!" he screamed._

 

Luke heard loud noises coming from upstairs. He had just finished his shift and came to see his hurt friend.

"Grizz? Are you okay up there?" he called him.

Suddenly he heard the most awful pained scream he ever had. He rushed upstairs, kicking his best friend's bedroom door.

He found Grizz sweating and shaking in his bed, screaming as loud as he could. He had never seen his friend like that. He still seemed to be dreaming, struggling against a nonexistent attacker. 

"Grizz! You gotta wake up, man. None of this is real!" he tried to shake his friend to wake him up. But Grizz was still screaming, lost in a traumatizing nightmare.

"No! Stop, Sam! Don't touch me! NO!"

"Grizz, stop struggling. I'm here, it's okay." he shook him with all his strength.

" _God is he dreaming about Sam hurting him…? I'm gonna kill the bastard for sure next time._ " Luke thought.

Grizz was hyperventilating under his grip but slowly began to wake up.

"Lu…Luke? Luke…" he sobbed.

"It's okay Grizz, it's me, everything's gonna be fine." he tried to reassure his trembling friend.

"Luke…It was so awful, Luke…"

"I know, I know. But it's over now, try to calm down, okay?"

"Luke…Luke…" he whispered between the tears.

The quarterback held him for a long time, rocking their bodies gently.

"Are you okay now? How are you feeling?"

"I'm better, thank you. Sorry…"

"Please don't apologize. You wanna talk about it?" he softly asked.

"I was back with Logan but this time it was Sam hurting me…It was so awful…"

"I'm sorry, Grizz. But you know Sam would never hurt you like that right?"

"Yeah, I know."

"He loves you, even if he sometimes acts like an asshole."

"Yeah I know."

Luke stayed with him the whole night, carefully watching over him. 

When morning came, Grizz slowly changed and left for the hospital as if nothing had happened. He really didn't want to see anyone but he couldn't let the whole town down by being selfish.

It was a busy day at the hospital. Will had mixed the food with some detergent by mistake and a huge part of the town had bad food poisoning. 

"Are you holding up, Grizz? There's been so many healings since the morning and you didn't even take a break." Kelly asked.

"I'm okay for now. A bit dizzy and hungry."

"When was the last time you ate?" she asked with an accusative look.

"Hum…yesterday morning maybe?"

"Grizz! Back home, right now! And eat something!"

"But, Kelly…"

"We'll be fine here, everybody's been treated, I can handle the rest with Gordie. Go home, doctor's orders." she smiled.

"Alright, see you later then."

In fact, he really wasn't feeling well. He hadn't had a good sleep for the past three days and exhaustion was coming back at him full force. Of course, as if this day couldn't get any worse, he met Sam on his way back home.

Sam was still moody because of their previous fight but seeing his boyfriend stumbling from exhaustion on the street broke his heart. Suddenly, all his love for the young man resurfaced and he wished he could take everything he had said back.

"Grizz, are you okay?" the deaf boy signed.

"Oh, you care now?" he retorted. He had neither the envy nor the energy to face Sam right now. He just wanted to go home and rest.

"You're really pale, Grizz."

"I'm fine, just a bit tired."

"I'll walk you home. No way you're gonna make it back on your own in this state."

He hated himself for it, but Sam was right. Each step was harder than the previous one and he wasn't sure to make it back home without fainting.

"Alright, whatever."

 

They walked silently, Sam helping his boyfriend when the latter felt his knees giving out. Grizz wanted to go back at his childhood home, away from the deaf boy, but he didn't have the energy to fight against Sam when he turned right towards Allie's place.

He helped him upstairs and laid him on the bed. Just before going out of the room to let him rest, Sam felt a weak hand grabbing his shirt.

"Please, Sam…Stay with me…"

"Grizz, you should rest."

"No…Please don't leave me alone. I need you, I'm sorry."

Feeling his heart tightening, Sam reflected on his actions. How could he do that to this handsome beautiful man? He had been such an asshole for the past few days.

" _What the hell was I thinking…? I should have asked him about telling Becca…And of course, instead of apologizing, I just acted like a bastard and rejected him._ " he thought to himself.

He softly seated on the bed and took a strain of hair that had fallen on his boyfriend's tired face to place it behind his fine ear.

"I'm sorry, Grizz. I'm so sorry…I behaved like an ass and rejected you when you needed me the most. If only you knew how sorry I am…I shouldn't have told Becca without speaking with you first and I'm sorry to have yelled at you instead of trying to understand your feelings. I said terrible things to you and I wish I could take them all back. I'm so sorry…"

"It's alright, Sam. It was a lot for you to take in and I'm sorry to put you through all this. Let's forget about it, okay? I just want you here with me, please don't leave me alone."

"I never will, honey."

"Those few days were awful without you…"

"What happened?" he asked worried.

"I had nightmares, terrible ones. I was so scared, Sam. I was so scared…" he whispered, a tear falling from his green eyes.

"I'm so sorry not to have been there, love. It's gonna be alright, I'm not leaving your side ever again, now."

"Aren't you mad at me for, you know…the other night?" he asked shyly.

"Mad at you? Of course not, Grizz. How could I be mad at you for this?"

"So…you're not giving up on me…?"

"I'm not. Never. We'll sort this out, okay? Together. We're gonna take things slow and you'll get through this, love."

"Thank you…" he said, his eyelids getting heavier.

"I love you, Grizz. So much."

"I love you too." he whispered, falling into a deep peaceful sleep.


	28. The Show

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Bean and Sam organize a show in the church.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Two songs will appear in the chapter. If you wanna listen to them while reading, help yourself :)
> 
> Wonderful Life - Katie Melua (Black cover)  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_-iDHKOciCk
> 
> Livin'on a prayer - Bon Jovi  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bXsmGSnq3lE

At Luke's surprise, the lovely couple was back together as if nothing had ever happened. Even more in love now it seemed. After Sam's apology, the two of them had softly talked about their physical problem, concluding they would take it slow for Grizz's sake. The latter was really grateful for such a comprehensive and tolerant boyfriend. He had talked to Becca again, apologizing for his last outburst. They found out that being sexual harassment victims could bring people quite close on an emotional level and were now happy to be there for each other in rough times. 

 

Luke still hadn't forgiven Sam and often let out sneaky comments about the deaf boy.

"Luke, you really have to stop doing that." Grizz had told him one day.

"Do what?"

"Always belittle Sam! Get over it and just be nice to him for God's sake."

"I can't, Grizz! You're the one with a fucking problem for forgiving him so fast. He was a real bastard."

"And he apologized for it! Can't you at least try to understand him instead of just ruining the mood with your sarcasm?"

"There's nothing to understand, man! He hurt you and said bullshit about you, that's enough for me to understand."

"Come on, dude. He was confused about the whole situation and he didn't want to hurt me by telling Becca. He just didn't think it through and confided in his best friend. I tell you my shit all the time, you can relate."

"That's not the same thing."

"It's not easy for him either, you know. Would you be all fine and always in a good mood if you had the same issues with Helena?"

"Hum…no, of course not…"

"See! You can't blame him for trying to get away from all this. You had plenty of time to wrap your head around the shitty situation with my father, but Sam didn't. Overnight he suddenly found out that his boyfriend had been fucking raped and abused his whole childhood. That was a hell of a shock for him, but did he run away? Did he leave me? Never. He just held me close to his heart, whispering kind and reassuring words. That's a pretty fast adjustment, so if he loses his shit once in a while, that's fine by me!"

"Grizz…"

"He makes me happy, Luke. So happy, you can't even imagine. You're my best friend and he's my boyfriend. You both matter so much to me, I'd really appreciate it if you at least tried to get over this."

"Yeah…Okay, you're right. I was a little bit harsh with him…"

"Thank you, man." he widely smiled at his friend.

"It's fine, Grizz. I just want you to be happy, alright? I hated to see you so hurt by another man and can't do a thing about it. I'm sorry, I was just worried for you."

"Oh my…Luke, are you hitting on me, being all jealous and all?" he loudly laughed.

"God, no, of course not!" he giggled with a small smile.

"Jay, Clark ! Please protect me, I think Luke wants to make me his man!"

"I always knew it!" Jason shouted, laughing his ass off. 

The former football team spent the afternoon together, laughing and joking, like in the old days.

 

A show featuring the dance class and the improvisation troop was scheduled that night and Sam was busy with the last rehearsals. He wished Grizz was there with him but he knew he also needed some private time with his team. The show was completely organized by Bean and himself and they couldn't wait to see the audience reactions. There would be first an open stage for everybody to show their talents and then the improv play would be sprinkled with danced parts. Sam secretly wished Grizz would sing something for him at the open stage, not that he would ever tell him.

"Hey Bec, do you think Grizz's gonna sing something tonight?" he signed to his best friend.

"Do you want him to?"

"Yeah, I love it when he sings. I wish I could hear his beautiful voice, but even just seeing him inhabited and sensitive with his music makes me so happy."

"Yeah, he has such a beautiful pure voice." she signed back.

"I'm sure it's as wonderful as him. You think he'll sing something for me tonight?"

"Well, you never know." she winked at him.

 

"Hey, dude. There'll be an open stage tonight before the show, we definitely have to do something." Jason told Grizz.

"Yeah! There's this rock song we used to sing in high school!" Clark added.

"Hum, I don't know." Grizz answered shyly.

"Oh come on, don't you wanna sing for Sam?"

"By the way, man, I never really get why you loved to sing for him like that. I mean, he can't hear you in the end…" Jason asked carefully.

"Well, it's something between us. He kinda senses it in a way."

"You're so romantic, Grizz!" Luke laughed.

"So, _Livin' on a prayer_ or something like that?" Jason offered.

"Okay, just to have fun with you guys." Grizz finally gave in.

"Great! I'll bring my drums then! See you later guys!"

"Yeah, see yah, Clark!" 

 

People were gradually taking seats in the church, waiting for the open stage.

"Where's Grizz?" Sam signed to his best friend.

"Don't know, maybe he's still with the Guard."

"I guess he won't sing in the end."

"Well, I'll catch with you later, Sam." she half laughed, making her way to the open stage.

"Wha…? Becca, where are you going?!"

He looked at the stage and couldn't believe his own eyes. Becca was going onstage where the wonderful Grizz was waiting for her. He held an acoustic guitar and seated himself in front of a mic.

"Hello, everybody! Thank you for coming tonight! We'll start the open stage with a little duet, Becca and I, if that's okay with you all."

The crowd woke up and cheered at the two singers.

"Alright, thank you. We'll sing you _Wonderful Life_ by the amazing _Black_ and rearranged by the both of us. Hope you like it!"

Grizz played the first notes of the peaceful relaxing song and everybody applauded them. When Grizz opened his mouth to sing, the crowd suddenly went silent. 

For Sam, it was simply wonderful. His marvelous boyfriend and his best friend, together on the stage, singing one of his favorite songs. Hundred of colors escaped the crowd as everybody were slowly being rocked by the harmonious voices. But the most beautiful one was of course Grizz's. A sweet warm burgundy, Sam had never seen such a soft and reassuring color.

He didn't know Grizz could also play the guitar and couldn't take his eyes from his slender fingers touching delicately the instrument. 

" _Look at me standing, here on my own again,_

_Up straight in the sunshine._

_No need to run, and hide,_

_It's a wonderful, wonderful life._ "

The lyrics echoed in Sam's heart, as Grizz didn't detach his gaze from his own. The whole song was clearly about them, his eyes telling him that everything would be fine. Sam fell in love a little more with the handsome young man, as if it was even possible.

When the song ended, the crowd stood up and applauded them.

"Thank you so much." he softly said in the mic, still looking at his boyfriend. His smile was tender and loving.

Sam was surprised to see the whole Guard getting onstage with guitars and drumsticks.

"Ready to roooooock?!" Jason shouted to the crowd.

People didn't bother to seat down again and cheered for them.

The next song began and the four friend's mood totally changed. They covered the famous rock song _Livin' on a prayer_. At the chorus, the whole crowd caught fire and shouted with them.

" _Ooowh, we're halfway there !_

_Oowh Livin' on a prayer!_

_Take my hand, and we'll make it, I swear!_

_Oowh, Livin' on a prayer!_ " Grizz happily sang. 

His color was now a bright turquoise blue and harmonized with the other one's of the band.

They ended the song in the crowd's loud applause before leaving the stage.

"Gosh, didn't know you could rock like that, Grizz!" Allie congratulated him.

 

A few other bands came in and the open stage soon were replaced by an improvisation play. They were all spending a great funny evening before Lexie began to lash out at Allie, pretending to be improvising her lines. She also attacked her close " _privileged_ " friends, including Sam and Grizz. The latter didn't like the accusing tone she was using and walked up to her after the show.

"What's your fucking problem, Lexie?"

"What, my improvisation wasn't up to Mister Perfect's fine taste?"

"You won't talk to Allie like that ever again, am I clear enough?" he said coldly overhanging her.

"Oh come on, I only spoke the truth."

"Allie's doing everything she can to keep your sorry ass safe, show some respect."

"Well, I'm sure anyone could do better."

"Oh, anyone, right? Then where the fuck were you when Cassandra got killed and everything was falling apart? Oh yeah, chickening out in your fucking house."

"Allie's not perfect!"

"She certainly is not, but she's doing everything she can to make this work ! What were you doing all this time, huh? Whimpering because Jason and Clark watched you change? Well, sorry but Allie was only coping with her sister's murder at the time."

"Oh, sorry we weren't all beaten up by our sick father like you!"

"That's not a competition of who's the more pitiful, Lexie! If you have something to tell Allie to help the town, help yourself, but don't lash out at her like that in public!"

"Whatever…"

" _I'm not kidding, Lexie._ " he said, fire in his green eyes.

She had never seen this side of Grizz. He was overhanging her with dangerous threatening eyes. She only ever saw him as a big fluffy teddy bear, incapable of hurting anybody because of his kindness. But she soon understood that messing with his loved ones was a really bad idea. She already knew he could be pretty protective but never thought he could prove to also be a tall menacing threat when he had to. Despite his weak heart and genuinely soft personality, you didn't wanna mess with him.

"O…Okay…" she whispered, looking away under the pressure.

"Then, if you got the point, we're good." he said, turning on his heels to join Sam and the others.

"Grizz? Where did you go?" Allie asked him, still pissed at the previous show.

"Don't worry, Allie, I made sure Lexie won't bother you anymore." he answered coldly.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you AlwaysInWonderland87 for helping me picking up the songs !


	29. Material Damage

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> There's an earthquake, the town has to find solutions.

"Call Luke!" Kelly shouted.

But Gordie didn't know what to do, he was completely lost. He couldn't take his eyes off his injured friend, stuck under un entire wall. 

After the show the night before, Allie had slowly calmed down and they had just gone home, not bothering with Lexie anymore. Of course, some people had taken the night further and ended up dangerously drunk. They were all resting at the hospital not to bother their roomies but when Gordie came to the hospital with Grizz the next morning, a violent earthquake shook the entire city. The hospital, being the oldest and weakest building, had suddenly collapsed on them, trapping all the people inside. Some were badly injured and others ran away in a panic that only made the situation worse.

"Gordie! Wake up! You have to get Luke, we need his powers to get him out of here!" she repeated, alarmed.

"G…Grizz…" he whispered, stretching a hand at his unconscious friend under the rubble. 

"Gordie, please. We also have to take the other wounded to the east wing. Right now, there's nothing we can do to help him out of there, we have to wait for Luke. He'll use his power and take care of him, but I need you to stop freaking out!"

Gordie lifted his head up to take in his medical friend's state. She was injured at the leg and blood ran down her eyebrow, but she seemed fine, helping as many people as she could to the east wing. 

"A…Alright, Luke." he mumbled, taking his phone out and dialing Luke's number.

"Hey, Gordie, did you feel the fucking earthquake ten minutes ago? God, that was something!" he cheerfully answered.

"L…Luke, there's been an accident at the hospital…The..The building almost entirely collapsed on us because of the earthquake."

"What?! God, are you guys okay?! I'm on my way to help!"

"Yeah, come quickly, Luke!" and with that, he had finally succeeded in composing himself again.

He was about to cast a last glance at Grizz before joining Kelly to help the others when he noticed his friend slowly waking up. He saw Grizz trying to get out of the rubble only to be crushed a bit more on the floor.

"Grizz! Don't move, you'll only make it worst!"

"G…Gordie…? What happened…?" Grizz weakly whispered.

"Kelly! Grizz's awake! Don't freak out, but the building collapsed on us because of the earthquake. A few other people are trapped like you and we're waiting for Luke to come help us with his powers."

"He…He won't be able to…help, he can o…only move small objects…" the injured boy said, his breath going a little wild.

"Grizz, stay calm, okay?" Kelly interrupted.

"Stay with us, alright? First, are you hurt anywhere?" she said, placing her hands on his one arm sticking out of the rubble, trying to localize his pain.

"I think…some of m…my ribs are broken…"

"Alright, can you feel both your legs? And arms?"

"Yeah…"

"Ok, you seem alright with just a few ribs broken and a concussion. Now, we need to get you out of here. Where the fuck is Luke?! The cafeteria's not so far!"

"Right here!" Luke called, running to their friends.

"Thank God." Gordie relaxed a bit.

"For Christ's sake, Gordie! You didn't tell me it was Grizz that got trapped!"

"Lu…Luke…" the injured boy whispered, even breathing exhausted him.

"Never mind, can you maybe remove the wall crushing him?" Kelly asked.

"Well, this wall is much too thick and big, I can only move small furniture at the most…"

"Please, Luke. At least try, you're our only hope." Gordie was freaking out again.

"A…Alright" Luke said, determination in his eyes. 

He looked at his best friend laying on the floor and immediately felt a new energy flowing through him. He placed his hands a few centimeters away from the facade and the whole wall began to shake. He softly lifted the rubble, being extra focused to avoid letting the wall fall again on his friend. 

Kelly and Gordie grabbed Grizz fast, careful not to hurt his ribs more. When he was out of the rubble, Luke let the wall down in a loud noise.

"Grizz! Are you okay, buddy?!" he asked, rushing to his best friend.

"Yeah…Yeah, I'm alright, thanks Luke. I can finally breathe." he answered, taking big respirations. 

"Okay, I know you, Grizz, and I know that the moment you can stand, you'll just go heal everyone out there. But there's a lot of people and you're already injured." Kelly began. 

"But…" Grizz tried, only to be interrupted.

"Of course I need your help to heal them, but you have to save your energy to be able to help _everyone._ So, no complete healing for now, I need you to hang on until we're sure everybody's safe. You just heal everything that's life-threatening or really bad and I'll handle the rest, are we clear?" she asked him, threat in her eyes. 

"Yeah, I understand. I won't push myself. Luke, sorry to ask that of you, but I have to be sure Sam wasn't at the hospital when…" he looked worriedly at his best friend.

"He's fine. He was at the cafeteria with me when it happened. He's safe." Luke reassured him.

"Great…Thank you!" Grizz answered, getting on his feet.

His side hurt like hell and he needed help to steady himself but once he caught his breath one last time, they headed to the east wing. Luke stayed behind with Gordie to help the possible other people trapped under rubble. 

The east wing was simply a living hell. People screaming, bleeding on the few hospital beds still standing up. The two medics tried their best to attend to everyone the fastest they could all day long, but they were both already exhausted and injured. They took alternating breaks to be sure to hang on till the end of this nightmare. 

 

The Guard was now helping making the hospital a safe place by moving the rubbles but it was only making it worse. It was already the evening when Luke came in to report the situation.

"Grizz, Kelly. We're doing everything we can to rehabilitate the west wing were your supplies were but the building's too old, there's nothing we can do, it's only getting worse."

"How long do you think this wing will hold on?" Grizz asked him.

"Really, it's hard to tell. But I'm not sure it's gonna hold on till tomorrow morning…All the rubble from the west wing is pressuring the east wing's walls. If we wanna stay here a little longer, we have to evacuate all the debris."

"Okay, Luke, I need you to call Campbell for me, please." he told him seriously.

"What?! What are you talking about, Grizz?" Kelly immediately reacted, mirroring Luke's puzzled face.

"Just call him here and let me talk to him." Grizz answered coldly, before turning to his next patient

"Okay." Luke didn't push further. 

He knew his friend was always the one keeping his composure in situations like that and he trusted him completely. If he needed Campbell here, then Campbell he will have here.

When the latter finally came to the hospital, Grizz took him apart to talk.

"What do you want, faggot?" Campbell started.

"Could you please use your power to destroy the rubble from west wing, Campbell?" Grizz didn't even hear the insult, too focused on keeping everyone safe.

"And why the fuck would I do that?" he softly laughed.

"Well, we're treating Elle in the east wing and if you don't want her to be crushed by tones of rubble by the end of the night, you should help the Guard with that."

"Elle's here? Is she injured?!" Campbell jumped suddenly, worry all over his perverse features.

"Yeah, we found her on the second floor this morning. I treated her already and now she just needs rest. But please, Campbell, we need you…" Grizz almost begged in shame.

"You treated her? Well…thank you, then. I'll help the guys to remove the debris."

"Thank you. If you don't want your power to be outed, they can give you privacy…"

"No, it's fine. I'm proud of my power. That way everybody will know not to mess with me." he ended the discussion, a sneaky smile on his face.

Grizz joined Kelly and Luke.

"Guys, we need to think of something. Campbell's gonna help you with the rubble, but we can't risk everyone's safety by staying in this collapsing building."

"You're right, but where could we move everyone? Nobody's gonna agree to let us empty their house to install an improvised clinic…"

"We can use mine." Grizz let out.

"Hum…Grizz? Are you sure?" Luke asked, surprised by the sudden offer.

"Yeah, of course. I don't live there anymore and it's pretty big. It's close from here so if we need supplies, it's convenient."

"But we'll have to empty it to install everything, you know."

"I know. Look, I don't really care if you move all my stuff, there's practically nothing of emotional value in there, so just help yourself." he concluded.

"Alright, then we'll move everything during the night and then the patients in the morning. If we get rid of the rubble, the east wing will be safe until tomorrow afternoon, that lets us plenty of time to empty your home." Kelly analyzed.

"Alright. And now, the both of you go to bed." Luke said in a bossy voice.

"What?!" they shouted together.

"You have to rest. Kelly, please treat Grizz's injuries before you go home. You're both exhausted and everybody's been treated now. I asked Gwen and Bean to come look after the patients and to contact you at the slightest problem."

"But…" Grizz tried.

"No buts, Grizz. You're barely standing up man, and don't think I forgot about your heart. Do you know how worried Sam was all day? He had no news from you and only knew that the hospital had collapsed. I told him you were fine but we both know that if you don't come home in one piece because you exhausted yourself, Sam's gonna kill me. And you, I think." he smiled warmly.

"Okay, then." he resigned himself, lifting his shirt for Kelly to look at the broken ribs.

The examination took approximatively twenty minutes and when they were finally leaving the building, Campbell showed up again.

"All done." he told Grizz. 

"Thanks, Campbell, I'll remember that."

"No problem. I heard you need volunteers to empty your old house and move in the hospital stuff, count me in."

"Hum…Are you sure Campbell? It's really nice of you but…" Kelly asked, suspicious.

"Nah, it's fine. I don't have anything to do anyway so if I can make my girl get out of this awful place sooner, I'll help."

"Alright, thank you Campbell. We'll meet in front of my old house at 5am, see you then." Grizz said.

"See you then!" Campbell nicely smiled.

He turned away and his nice smile shaped into a more perverted one, malice glowing in his eyes.

" _If it's to search you old house and discover your dirty little secrets, any time my dear Grizz._ " he thought, snickering.


	30. Smell of Revenge

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Campbell's planning something, but Grizz doesn't go down easily.

When he came home, Grizz couldn't wait to see his boyfriend. It had been a hard day and all he wanted at this moment was to cuddle in Sam's arms.

As he opened the door to Allie's place, his two friends rushed at him.

"Grizz, are you okay?" Becca asked.

"Oh my God, Grizz, what happened at the hospital? Are you alright? Are you injured?" Allie added, taking him in her arms. He flinched a bit at the contact of her tight grip on his ribs.

"Oh, you're injured, I'm sorry!" Allie apologized, letting him out of her hug to take a few steps back.

Sam walked up slowly to him, a soft smile on his face. He didn't say anything but his gaze was comforting and warm. He hugged him softly, carefully avoiding his broken ribs. Grizz gave in to the gentle embrace and took a big breathe to be filled in Sam's sweet natural smell. They stayed a few more seconds like that, holding each other tight. Sam finally took a step back and passed a tender thumb on his tired features.

"I'm glad you're home, love."

"Me too, honey." he smiled at this amazing man who could ease his mind in a matter of seconds.

Allie and Becca deeply felt they didn't belong in this peaceful delicate moment and retired to the living room.

Still smiling, Sam took his hand and led him to their bedroom. The silence surrounding them wasn't embarrassing or tense. The closeness of their body and mind was enough for them and it felt as if any words would be inappropriate. 

They got to bed, Sam slowly massaging his boyfriend's knotted back.

"Are you okay, Grizz?" he gently whispered.

"I've had better days, but now that you're with me, yeah, I'm okay." he signed, to be sure his lover would understand.

"Great. Please, don't worry me like that again…I didn't know what exactly happened at the hospital. For a moment, I thought you might be dead…" tears fell from his blue eyes.

Grizz took his hands and turned to face him. He could now see how relieved the deaf boy was to know he was fine.

"I'm sorry, Sam. I'm so sorry. I'm here now, alright? I'm safe and sound, not going anywhere." he smiled tenderly, wiping the tears with his thumb gently.

He could only imagine how panicked Sam must have felt when he didn't know if he was dead or alive. 

"I'm never gonna put you through something like that ever again, love. I promise. I'm sorry, next time I'll make sure you know I'm fine."

"O…Okay." Sam whispered, cuddling in his boyfriend's loving arms.

They fell asleep hugging each other, much to Grizz's ribs disappointment. But the young man couldn't care less at the moment. He needed to feel Sam's heartbeat against his, to feel their shared unconditional love through the warmth of Sam's body against his. Never in his entire life did he sleep so well. When the alarm clock woke him up at 4:30am, he felt rested, peaceful and full of love. 

He couldn't get down from his little cloud. Everything seemed more beautiful, more bright, more noble. For the first time of his life, he felt whole and entirely happy.

 

Despite his general state of mind, he knew this morning would be difficult for him. He had gotten over the painful memories trapped in his old house but to dig into his childhood and get rid of everything as he was about to do made him uncomfortable. He knew that Logan had kept secrets for years and absolutely didn't want to out them right now. 

" _Everything's perfect right now, why does he have to remind me of all this pain now of all times…?_ " he thought, making his way to the already crowded garden. 

"Hey Grizz, did you rest well?" Luke asked, seeing him in the garden.

"In fact, I'm fully rested, thank you. Did you sleep at all?"

"Yeah, I went home just after you guys. Helena was waiting for me to kick my ass. She can be so bossy sometimes."

"I _what_?!" Helena appeared behind them.

"Oh, hum, nothing, hon!" Luke giggled.

"Hey Helena, thank you for volunteering." Grizz greeted her with a wide smile.

"No problem, Grizz. Thank you for your hard work yesterday at the hospital."

"Anytime." he winked at her.

Before entering his old house, he made an announcement to clear a few things.

"Hey, guys! Thank you all for coming this early, it really means a lot. We have to empty this house the fastest we can to be able to move the patients the sooner as possible. I think we should begin with the ground floor and then move to the upstairs rooms. Don't throw anything, just put all the stuff in those boxes. It's my house so I want to be the one handling my dad's room, it's the first on the right upstairs. Please don't touch neither the library nor the instruments. For everything else, just make yourself at home." he ended, smiling.

"Alright, let's begin! You three, you come with me. The five of you will manage heavy furniture with Clark and…" Luke explained.

Grizz already made his way to the house, hoping to have a few last minutes alone in his childhood house. Even if it was a bad place for him, it still hold happy memories with his mother and he felt his heart tightening at the idea of saying goodbye to those.

When he opened the front door, he was shocked to find Campbell, smiling in his living room as if the place was his.

"Campbell? What are you doing here? Shouldn't you be out to get Luke's explanations?" he asked, suspiciously.

"Ah yeah, sorry. Just admiring the decoration." he passed him, still oddly smiling.

" _Weird…_ " he thought. He still had tons to do and hurried to get all the boxes they'd need, forgetting about Campbell.

Soon everybody was making their way in and out of the crowded place, lifting furnitures and boxes. Grizz was talking with Kelly about transforming the library into a waiting room when they heard loud noises coming from upstairs.

"Ladies and gentleman, I've found some interesting tapes of young Grizz, would you all like to see them?" he heard Campbell resonate.

"What the…" he mumbled.

He never thought he had any recordings of his childhood. His mother had taken some pictures of his young years but after her death, his dad had never held a camera at him again.

Everybody cheered at the idea, delighted to finally take a break. Grizz didn't think much of it as he heard them all take place in front of the TV in his bedroom.

 

He was softly laughing with Helena when he suddenly heard a child's piercing shout coming from the TV upstairs and everybody growing silent. 

" _It…It's my voice…_ " he thought, suddenly panicking. 

He knew exactly those screams and when he had yelled them. Dropping the box he was holding, he rushed in his old bedroom upstairs. Everybody slowly looked at him with blank face and shocked expressions. He lifted his head in what felt like slow-motion to discover the awful video playing on the TV.

It was him. Pinned down to a wall, his father over him. His old self screaming as loud as he could, never to be heard. He saw Campbell giggling in the corner of his shocked eyes. 

He was in a deep state of shock, his mouth slightly open and unable to detach his gaze from the horrible scene played on the screen. He knew it, by heart. He had lived it. But nothing could take him out of his stupor.

Was he ashamed? Afraid that others would judge him for the crime of which he was the victim? No. They could judge him for all that mattered, what struck him though was the realization that his sick father had completely recorded his forbidden acts with his minor son. 

His hands began trembling at his side and he could hear Luke calling for him in a far daze. He didn't register the next event. Luke barging in, shouting to get out of the room and stopping the tape. Him pinning Campbell against a wall to punch him right in the face. 

"What did you do, fucking bastard! Where did you find those?!" he yelled at a choking Campbell.

"I just had to search Logan's bedroom for a bit, thought it would be fun to watch it altogether." he laughed, satisfied.

"I'm gonna fucking kill you!" Luke screamed. With that, he punched the evil bastard a few more times before Helena stopped him, asking him to calm down.

Composing himself, he let Campbell fall limply on the floor, still a perverse satisfied smile on his bloody face. Luke walked carefully to Grizz, who was still standing alone in the middle of the room with dead eyes. He saw the way his best friend was badly shaking and hyperventilating so, very gently, he walked in his field of view.

"Grizz…? It's gonna be okay, buddy. You're safe now." he whispered, extra aware of every reaction coming from his friend. 

The problem was, there was none. He wasn't even sure Grizz had heard or seen him in his current state. He passed a hand in his friend's back, afraid Grizz would flinch at the contact. But he didn't. It was as if he was dead. Now that he could freely touch him, Luke led him to the bed as Helena hushed Campbell out of the room. He thanked Helena and asked her to leave them alone.

When he looked up at his shocked friend, tears were now freely falling from his unfocused green eyes. He had never seen someone cry so much without having any reaction. The tears just wouldn't stop and were now soaking his hands. Moving closer, Luke could finally distinguish something coming out frenetically of his best friend's mouth.

"S…Sam…Sa…Sam…" he repeated again and again like a broken record.

Luke didn't say a word and called Kelly to ask her to go get Sam as fast as she could. When the latter arrived at the old house, Luke told him everything in front of the closed bedroom. Sam didn't understand the half of Luke's explanations. The only thing his mind could register was that his lover was in this forsaken room, alone and hurt. He didn't let Luke finish his tirade before quietly entering the bedroom. 

Taking in his boyfriend's apathetic state, Sam walked carefully to him and knelt down before him. He took his head in his small fingers and lifted his head up slowly.

Life progressively came back into Grizz's stare at the sight of his lover and he broke down.

"Sam…Sam…"

"I know. I know, love…" he softly whispered, rocking his trembling body against his.

Grizz didn't have to explain how he felt, Sam understood every single emotion coming from his boyfriend.

"I know, it's unfair. He had no right. I'm sorry, Grizz." he went on, crying with his lover.

 

They stayed like that for a whole hour. Everybody was now out of the house, only Luke, Helena and Kelly were waiting for them in the living room. They had handcuffed Campbell at a big couch, not sure of what to do with him. This was a clear direct attack at Grizz and could largely be seen as a crime. They needed Grizz and Allie's decision to do anything but Luke felt his blood boiling at the sight of the bastard.

The couple made their way downstairs slowly and Luke was immensely relieved to see that Grizz had calmed down and was now completely back at his old self.

"Sorry for the commotion, I hope you still could install the clinic." Grizz said, his voice hoarse from all the crying. Kelly only nodded.

Luke had unfortunately seen Grizz break down a lot of times now but never before had he seen him looking so determined and strong after one. His friend held his head high and seemed totally in tune with himself. Suddenly, he was no longer the poor little boy who cried alone in his room. What he saw in Grizz was a tall, determined mature man. 

At this moment, it was as if nothing could stop him anymore, as if what he had just seen and experienced an hour ago hadn't baffled him at all. He had needed time to adjust be he now rose like the phoenix of his ashes.

Grizz quietly walked up to Campbell. The latter didn't like the unwavering behavior Grizz was having.

"You know, Campbell, I was never really afraid of you. But now, I have the complete certainty that you don't have the power to ever hurt me again." he said softly, kneeling in front of him.

"And why is that, faggot?" he snapped, not liking this feeling of powerlessness. 

"Well, you see, dear Campbell, I don't have anything to hide anymore." a satisfied smile grew on his face.

"You made sure to reveal every single one of my secrets to the whole town. Now, I'm _free_. Nothing weighs on my shoulders anymore. No secret, no shame, _nothing_. Everybody knows exactly who I am and I wouldn't have it any other way."

"Everybody knows about the disgusting whore faggot you are!" Campbell said, his eyes uncertain and hateful.

"And I couldn't care less." he warmly smiled at his enemy. That last kind gesture made Campbell sick in his stomach, knowing perfectly he had lost.

"The only way you connect with people, Campbell, is by making them hate you, making them fear you. But I'm not afraid anymore. And that, my friend, scares the shit out of you." he gently laughed. 

Before he left the house for good, he turned to Luke calmly.

"Luke, could you please take care of him for me?" Grizz asked.

"Oh and above all, _destroy those tapes_." he added coldly.

"I will." 

"Thank you. Well, I now have a clinic to run, see you later." he said, exiting the room with Sam proudly by his side.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sam and Grizz are way too badass for Campbell.


	31. The Decision

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The crew struggles with Campbell's punishment.

Despite his strong-looking behavior the whole day, people staring at him with pity and disgust bothered him, a lot. He finally retired at Becca's for their weekly ASL lesson, glad to be out of public sight.

Sam had already told her about the events of the morning but Grizz was grateful that she didn't push the subject. The both of them were planning a big ASL thing very soon and Grizz had still so much to learn. He was already doing really well but he sometimes lacked some vocabulary. 

When they were done, he hurried home. He had this strange impression that he would be able to breathe again only once he got to Sam. He was aware of the addiction he was developing towards his lover but couldn't bring himself to care right now. When he arrived home, Luke, Allie, Helena and Sam were quietly talking in the kitchen.

"Hey guys." Grizz greeted them with a tired voice.

"Hey Grizz!" Allie smiled.

"Yo, dude." Luke answered.

"Welcome home, honey." Sam kissed him.

"Thanks." he answered, so happy to see him.

"You look pale, Grizz. How was your first day at the clinic?" Sam added.

"I'm just tired, don't worry. And the clinic, well, it was...strenuous. People kept complaining about the wait, the lack of staff, the pain. I'm not sure they all understood that it was only Kelly and I treating them…I mean, I'm gladly willing to heal everybody but I'm no medical slave." he sighed.

"You tell them Grizz!" Jason shouted happily, entering the house.

"Hey Jay, how was your day?" Grizz asked his friend with a wide smile.

"Well, it was complicated…In fact, it's a good thing you're home, Grizz…"

"We have to talk about Campbell." Luke interrupted his teammate. 

"What about him? I thought you had handled the situation." Grizz asked in a neutral way.

"Well, we can't do what we want. This town is already fragile, if the Guard takes an unofficial revenge, people are gonna freak out. We have to decide of something fair with you and Allie."

"Are you gonna hold a trial?" Helena asked Allie.

"I don't know…I want to, but if we have a trial, we'll have to explain everything to everyone and…"

"And humiliate Grizz one more time? No way." Sam interrupted. 

"We're not trying to humiliate him, Sam. We just want to be able to punish Campbell in a fair way, without the whole town turning on the Guard." Allie answered calmly. She knew this discussion would be a difficult one.

"I'm sorry, Allie, but I think that Grizz has already been reminded of his past often enough for a life time now. If you want to just point everything out so that people would speak behind his back even more…"

"He's right!" Jason cut him off.

"Sam, Jason, you don't understand, this could be a real disaster if the town loses faith in the…"

"Guys!" Luke stopped everybody. 

"I'm sorry, but maybe we could ask…Grizz?" he quietly said.

They all blushed in embarrassment, noticing how they hadn't even asked the main concerned. They all went silent and turned to Grizz. He seemed in a deep reflexion.

"What do you think we _should_ do, Grizz?" Luke asked him softly.

"We can't have the people turning on the Guard. It's the town's safety we're talking about, that's really important to be completely transparent on this matter. As for the trial…I don't know. Last time, Dewey was executed because he was charged for murder. Campbell didn't kill anyone, he was just a fucking bastard to me. We already know how limited we are in terms of punishment. I think we first have to find solutions for after the trial before anything."

Nobody said anything. They knew he was right but couldn't bring themself to acknowledge it. Luke composed himself and stepped in.

"And what do you _want_ , Grizz?" his best friend asked him.

"What _I_ want? I don't know exactly. I hate him, I just want him to suffer the same humiliation he put me through." he answered coldly. 

"What can we actually do, then?" Allie asked.

"We could leave him with Grizz 2.0 in the woods for a whole night." Jason said, proud of his idea.

"No, Jason. The fucking bastard would probably get himself killed and I don't want all New Ham to conduct a grizzly killing mission." he laughed at his friend.

"Ask for public apologizes? Or make him work for you at the clinic for some time?" Helena offered.

"What the fuck are you all talking about? He deserves to die for what he did!" Sam got mad.

"You're being irrational, love." Grizz tried to ease the deaf boy.

"Maybe I am, but I don't care! He hurt you, Grizz, badly! And you all want to let him go with some fucking trial and a little slap on the hand?"

"That's not what we said." Helena retorted.

"I don't care if this is revenge or if people don't like it. You guys are gonna beat the shit out of him till I can't recognize his fucking face anymore, alright? You're with me, Luke? Jason?" he said angrily.

"Hum, I'm not sure about this, Sam…Politics are also important you know." 

"What the fuck, Luke! I'm sorry to tell you this, but you already didn't protect Grizz from Logan the first time cause you didn't do what needed to be done! When are you gonna stop threatening people and finally act?!"

"Sam!" Grizz shouted.

He looked deeply in his lover's eyes. He could see he had gone way too far by the way Grizz was now completely angry.

"You've gone too far, this time. Don't talk to Luke like that, Sam. You weren't there at the time, he was. He helped me in ways you have absolutely no idea about. So don't you dare blame him for what happened, cause he did exactly what he had to." he said coldly.

"Sorry…" Sam calmed down. "I'm just…"

"Worried, I know, Sam." he interrupted with a soft calm smile. 

"But we can't just go lash out at him for everything he did. We're smarter than that." he laid a hand on his boyfriend's.

"I know…I'm sorry, Luke, everybody. But I think you don't realize how dangerous he really is."

"He never hurt me physically." Grizz told him, innocently.

"Not yet. But he obviously took you as a target now, it's only a matter of time before he takes things further."

"We'll protect him, Sam." Luke said with confidence.

"Yeah, nobody touches even a single one of Grizz's perfect hair." Jason added.

 

With that, they dismissed the little comite for the night. When he pushed their bedroom's door, all the exhaustion from the day came back at him full force.

"Are you okay, love? How are you feeling now?" Sam asked him worriedly. Grizz understood immediately that he was talking about the tapes.

"Well, it hurts, you know. To know that everybody now knows about this too. I feel so exposed. People are talking in my back, judging me. I hate it." he whispered the last part.

"I'm sure they're not, honey."

"They are. I heard them, Sam…Talking about how pitiful and weak I was on the tape."

"I know you're strong, Grizz. That's all that matters. Let them talk, they don't deserve neither your attention nor your energy."

"You're right…Did Luke destroy the tapes?" he asked quietly.

"I'm not sure. I heard he thought that maybe you'd want to be the one to burn them."

"Mmh. I want to be there when he does." 

"Alright, now come here." he hugged his beautiful boyfriend.

"You know it's alright to be sad or depressed, right?" Sam quietly whispered.

"I have no reason to be depressed when you're by my side, Sam. Whatever Logan or Campbell throw at me, if you're there with me, love, there's nothing I can't overcome."

"Thank you, but…I feel like you're trying to be strong to prove everyone that this doesn't bother you. You don't have to pretend with me, Grizz. Never."

Suddenly, the words the ten years old Sam had whispered to him on a hospital bed so many years ago came back in his mind.

" _It's okay, you don't have to pretend, Grizz. Not with me. I know you're sad to quit dancing, you have the right to be hurt._ " He smiled at the memory.

"I…I couldn't think, you know. When I saw this video, my brain sorta froze and the only one I could think of was you. I can't believe the bastard filmed everything…"

"Yeah, this is fucked up…"

"You should have seen their blank shocked face looking all at me. I felt like the eyes of hundred monsters where suddenly strutting my every movement. I still can't shake this oppressing feeling out of my mind when I'm out there."

"I understand. It'll fade once everybody just stop talking about it, it won't last."

"I love you, Sam." Grizz whispered, tears building in his eyes.

"I love you too, honey, so much." Sam smiled.

 

When morning came, the both of them had a day off and were really grateful for it. They took place at the table to brainstorm, trying to find some suitable punishment.

"Grizz, you saw Campbell's past. Why don't you just out him like he did to you?" Becca began.

"Cause I don't wanna be the same asshole he is, Becca. Plus, people need to know that their secrets are safe with me, if I begin to betray everybody I don't like, they won't trust me for long."

"What could we do then…? We can't cast him out of town cause we can't protect our borders and a public apology isn't hard enough." Gordie added.

"I have an offer for you guys." Grizz stated. 

"I called Erika this morning and she agreed to let you know about her power. She can lock a person's power in sorts of pendants. The person feels a sort of void because of the lack of power but it's not painful at all. The pendants take different coloring depending on the nature of the power."

"You want to take Campbell's power away?" Allie asked, with wide eyes.

"Yes I do. I don't think there's any point in hurting him physically, an emotional punishment will probably be much more efficient. Campbell is proud of his power because he knows people are afraid of him because of it. By locking his power away, we can punish him and at the same time monitor his dangerous power."

"I think it's a great idea. It really would put me at ease to know he can't hurt you with his power anymore." Sam added, smiling at his boyfriend. 

"Is this irreversible? Cause his power was quite useful last time we needed him." Luke said.

"If the necklace is broken, the owner gets his power back."

"But who will wear the necklace though? If it's Campbell, he'll do everything he can to break that pendant." Gordie pointed out.

"I will." Grizz said with confidence.

"What? Are you kidding me?" Sam asked angrily.

"Please, don't freak out, honey. Honestly, with the Guard around me, I'm the most protected dude in this town. Campbell knows that I have dirt on him and wouldn't risk hurting me. Without his power, I'm much stronger than him anyway." he giggled.

"Are you sure, Grizz? It's a huge responsibility." Allie concluded.

"Yeah, I'm sure. This is between him and I. I have to do that, I _want_ to do that. For me, it'll be a reminder of my revenge on him." he added in a stern voice.

"Alright, then what about the trial?" Becca asked carefully. 

"People need to know exactly why we're punishing him. We have to be totally transparent with this." Gordie said.

"What do you think, Grizz? Would that be okay with you…?" Allie asked him.

"Well…I really don't want to, but I guess we have no choice." he said, looking at his boyfriend with sad eyes.

"It'll be alright, love." he responded by hugging him.

"Who will defend Campbell?" Allie asked.

"I guess Elle will, or Campbell himself." Gordie answered.

"And who do you want as your lawyer, Grizz?" Allie said.

"Hum…I don't know, I'd say Sam but it's not a good idea, we're much too close. Maybe, Becca?"

"It would be my pleasure, my dear." she smiled at him.

 

A few days later, the trial began.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for this chapter. It's kinda flat and nothing happens but I promise that next chapters will be better :)))
> 
> And thank you AlwaysInWonderland87 for your help on the punishment pitch ;)


	32. The Trial

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Is it as simple as bad guys against good guys? I don't think so...

"Grizz, can you come here to answer some questions, please?" Becca asked him.

He stood up from his chair on shaking legs. Despite all the reassuring words Sam had told him the previous night and the false sense of confidence, he couldn't help his heart to race in his chest. He knew that he wasn't responsible for his past, but still, acknowledging it in front of the whole town with strong determination was definitely harder than he thought.

He sat in front of everyone and tried to relax at Becca's warm smile. He had already briefly discussed the trial's defense with her the previous day, but this time, it was so different. He wasn't only with his friend and boyfriend, people he deeply trusted.

"We all understand that this can be a really uncomfortable subject for you, so if you feel the need to take a break or to take some time to answer the questions, please do. We also need you to be absolutely honest and to tell us everything so we can clearly understand the situation, is that alright with you, Grizz?" she gently asked.

"O…Okay" he whispered.

"First, let's talk about you childhood. You were born from Ellen Visser and Logan Visser. Your mother passed away when you were eight, am I right?"

"Yes." he answered confidently. His mother was the only thing he was now in peace with.

"What happened after your mother passed away, Grizz? Did your father's behavior change?"

"Yes, he became really violent." he felt the uncomfortable questions coming.

"Violent, you say. Did he hit you, Grizz?" she asked in an interested way.

"Yes, he…he hit me almost everyday for years." he answered, trying to stay as composed as possible with the growing whisperings coming from the crowd.

Even before the trial, he had suspected that the constant attention from the audience and the negative emotions coming from everyone would affect him greatly because of his power. He was now completely certain of it. 

"Alright, can you please give us some exemples of those beatings? It's not that I don't trust you, but the jury has to get the proof you're not lying." she said with an apologetic look.

" _Well…Now comes the hard part_." he thought to himself.

"Hum…Usually he lost it when I talked about my mother or anything related to her. He would suddenly yell insults and begin to hit me on the side or kicking me on the floor. He was always drunk and after completely lashing out at me, he always collapsed on the couch in the living room. When I was sure he was asleep, I usually went to find refuge either at Luke's place or in our library at home."

"Can you give us specific exemples, please?" she insisted.

"Well…hum, I took dance classes when I was, like, ten and when he discovered it, he was furious. He threatened me but I wouldn't listen so he broke my knee to prevent me from dancing behind his back ever again. I had a seizure that night and ended up at the hospital."

Gosh how hard it was. Not only to tell his most dark times to a whole crowd, but to have to explain it, describe it, _reliving it_. He could still feel his father's hard punch against his abused cheek and he felt the sudden urge to escape the trial right now. But he knew he had to hold on, the worst was still to come.

"Alright, I think we can all acknowledge the victim's physical abuse now." she said, turning to the jury.

"Grizz, how do you feel about this past of yours? Is it something you've made peace with now?" Becca asked him gently.

"No, it's not. I'm still really uncomfortable about it all."

"So uncomfortable that it's not something you wanted everyone to know about, I guess."

"No, it's a very private matter…" he confessed.

"Who outed you then, if you didn't tell everyone?"

"Well, Campbell tried to spread lies about my childhood, exposing me in front of everyone."

"And how did he know about it?"

"Hum…I can't tell you..."

The crowd caught fire, not understanding why the fuck he wouldn't give this important information.

"I'm sorry, Grizz, but you have to tell us everything if you want us to be able to help you."

"Well…we had some kind of altercation when we were establishing the power list. I didn't want him to feel bad about some of his personal problems so to show him that we all have issues, I told him that my father hit me."

"So, you _willingly_ told him?!" she asked, not expecting this answer.

"Yes I did." he told her with confidence. 

He regretted telling Campbell about it but never would he feel guilty for trying to help someone out. Trustworthy or not, he deserved to know he wasn't alone in this kind of issues.

He eyed Campbell from his seat and saw a huge smile on his face. He had unwillingly returned the situation at his advantage.

"Why did you tell him, Grizz?"

"Because I trusted him." he answered, completely honest.

"Did he prove himself worthy of such a trust?"

"Well…He did betray me later…" 

"And is it something you often do, trust people too easily?"

"I'm often told that, yeah." he told her, not understanding her point.

"Right, so as I wanted to point out, Grizz is a man who trusts people really easily. He has a great heart, hence his healing power, and was cruelly outed by someone he blindly trusted." she told the jury.

"We can understand the viciousness of the accused in this situation. Grizz only tried to help him, but how did he respond to this kindness? By exposing him and spreading lies about him. Physical abuse against minor is a really serious matter and leave the victim with huge self-esteem issues, even PTSD. The fact that he outed the victim on this exact subject is not something to take lightly. Campbell didn't just point out any scoop or something like that. He used social pressure to obviously hurt him." Becca finished with confidence.

Grizz's heart was still racing. He only then took in how much Campbell had hurt him that night, probably denying it before.

"No further question for the moment, thank you, Grizz."

"Campbell, do you want to question the victim?" Allie asked him.

The confident bastard had decided to defend himself on the case.

"Yes, please." he got up, widely smiling.

Grizz felt sick as their gaze locked. Never would he look down because of Campbell.

"Hey Grizz, how are you?" he laughed.

"Well, little bit nervous." he answered coldly.

"What's your role in this new society, Grizz?"

"I'm a healer, I work with the Guard and I protect the power list."

"Yeah, and by protecting and creating this power list, you understand how hard it was for everyone to trust you with their deepest secrets. Powers are a really intimate and personal matter after all." Campbell went on.

"Yes, I totally understand and thank everybody for this trust." Grizz said with confidence.

"Then, you understand that the person we entrust this power list with should be someone we entirely rely on and that has no secret for the whole community? I mean, you were the one to almost force us to reveal ourselves to you, it's only normal to ask of you to be totally transparent in return, right?"

"Hum, I guess so. I never forced anyone to tell me anything. I tried to be very professional with this and…"

"That's not the point. Please only answer to the question, Grizz." he interrupted, smiling.

"…Yeah, I guess everyone is in right to ask of me to be totally honest with them." he knew exactly where Campbell was trying to take this and he hated it.

"So, by exposing your secrets, don't you think I only allowed the whole town to benefit this right at transparency?"

"Huh…" Grizz was confused. 

"Please just answer the question." he smiled viciously.

"…I, I don't know. I guess the people have the right to know but it maybe should come from me?" he tried.

"I understand you point of view, but, in total honesty, Grizz, were you ever gonna tell us about this?"

"…No, I wasn't." he said guiltily. He knew he had lost this game.

"So, everybody trusted you with their secrets because you were the one to ask them to expose themselves, but you never intended to do the same, am I right?"

"You are." he lowered his head in shame.

"No further question, thank you, Grizz." he went back to his seat completely satisfied.

 

But Becca didn't give up and went forward on the next huge matter.

"Grizz, I'm sorry to ask this of you, but you said earlier that your father abused you physically, did he ever sexually harassed you?" Becca asked him carefully.

In that moment, he felt the whole audience hold their breath. He himself couldn't get his lungs to function. His heart sped up and he had to force himself to take huge breath before answering.

"Yes, he did." he told her in a raw voice.

"Let me be more precise, did Logan Visser rape you, Grizz"

Becca hated herself to ask his distressed friend to so obviously assume his trauma. Being also a victim of sexual harassment, she totally understood how hard what she was forcing him to admit was and she regretted having even agreed to this trial.

Grizz felt panic gripping him forcefully. In a few seconds, he was breathing heavily, clearly hyperventilating. The crowd's attention, those shameless questions, the memories of his past lingering on his mind, it was too much to take in. But he had already endured this trial for too long to break now. So he slowly took deep breath and tried to pull himself together.

"Y…Yes, he did…" he whispered weakly. 

The whole crowd could feel the distress he desperately was in and went completely silent, feeling sorry for their friend.

"I guess it's something extremely hard to talk about for you, is it?"

"Y..Yes it is." he couldn't bring himself to answer with anything more than the strict minimum. It was already huge for him.

"Then, what did you feel when Campbell knowingly projected tapes of said rapes in front of twelve person in the very home they happened?"

"I…I f…felt betrayed and…hurt." he told her with pleading eyes.

" _Please, please, stop Becca, I can't do this anymore…I can't do this._ " he thought.

By the face she made, she clearly had understood his very thoughts.

"The fact only that the accused searched Grizz's house to find those tapes and then decided to project them in a room full of people says enough, I have no further questions."

Campbell stood up again.

"Do you have any evidence that I searched the house, Grizz?"

"No…No I don't…"

"We were currently emptying your childhood house, do you admit that it's highly probable that I only stumbled upon them when I was helping in your dad's bedroom?"

"I had clearly s…said that I didn't want anyone to enter this room." Grizz regained a little confidence.

"And where was I during those explanations, Grizz?"

"I…Inside the house."

"Did I hear any of it then?"

"No, I don't think so."

"So, after I volunteered to help you empty your house, do you admit it is highly probable that I was just trying to help by emptying you father's bedroom, not having heard of your previous request?"

"Yes, it's probable." 

" _I hate him, I hate him_." he thought, shooting daggers with his eyes.

"Did you maybe think about the possibility that I only wanted everybody to take a break by watching some old tapes about young Grizz? You didn't really intervene when I offered to watch them."

"I didn't, cause I didn't know what was in them!" he said forcefully.

"And in what ground do you accuse _me_ of knowing what was in them? Was there any writing on the cover that could warn me or anything that could make me suspect anything?"

"No, there was nothing written on the tape…You couldn't know."

"No further questions, thank you." he went back to his seat.

 

Becca was beginning to freak out. She hadn't expected Campbell to be so intelligent and to reverse the situation to his advantage. She had other questions for Grizz but the way her friend was slightly shaking told her that he couldn't take anymore of this interrogation.

Grizz felt humiliated. For the third time because of Campbell. He had made him look like someone who accused people without real motives and requestioned every single accusation. He could feel that even the crowd was confused as what to think and he hated it. He just wanted to stand up and to yell at them to recognize the real asshole this bastard had been to him, not just stay there passively, waiting for Campbell to convince them of his good faith.

Allie asked him to go back to his chair, giving his place to Campbell. When they walked past each other, Campbell gave him a little slap on the ass, laughing and whispering a little " _Faggot!_ ". Grizz wanted to cry. He had been exposed, ashamed and ridiculed and all that for nothing if Campbell won the trial. His despair was mixed with angry feelings. Angry at Campbell for doing this to him, angry at the town for not realizing that this was only a game for him and furious at himself for not being able to defend himself against of this fucking liar. 

A few seats further, Sam was boiling with rage, hesitating to killing his own brother on the spot.

Becca patted Grizz's shaking shoulder before standing out to interrogate Campbell.

"Campbell, what was your first reaction when Grizz accidentally touched you hand when his was doing the power list?"

"I didn't take it very well." Campbell said on the defensive.

"What did you do exactly?"

"I…choked him against a wall." he admitted.

"Can you describe yourself as a violent man, Campbell?"

"Hum…Only when I'm threatened."

"Was Grizz currently threatening you then?"

"He was gonna tell everybody what he saw in me."

"Did he tell you that? Cause given what he told me, he precisely assured you that he'd keep it a secret. Is it something you maybe assumed by yourself?"

"Well…I guess so."

"Then you acknowledge that your reaction was excessively violent given the current situation?"

"Maybe it was a bit…disproportionated."

"Aren't disproportionately violent reactions what definite a violent man, Campbell?"

"Yes…"

"So can you still assure us that you're not a violent man?"

"I don't think so."

"Thank you. Other question, have you ever actively taken part in the town's duties?"

"Not really, I accept the rules but there's no way I'm gonna serve some shit at the cafeteria." he laughed.

"Then can you explain your sudden urge to give the citizens their " _right to transparency_ " towards Grizz?"

"I don't know, I suddenly felt very generous." he smiled nervously. 

"Was it the same generosity that prompted you to volunteer for a work that would give you full access to Grizz's house? Work where a complete search of the place would totally be imaginable, given the nature of the duty." Becca said with confidence.

"Yes, it was the same generosity." he smiled at her.

"Then again the same generosity that led you to project some unknown tapes, found in his abusive father's room while knowing precisely that said father could have recorded terrible things about him?"

"Yeah, I'm a very generous person." he didn't smile anymore. 

"Thank you, Campbell, no further questions."

 

The trial went on for a few hours, interviewing other witnesses. They asked Luke to certify Logan's abuse and to speak about the behavior Campbell adopted after Grizz's breakdown in his childhood home. Half an hour after, the jury came back with a verdict. 

It was finally Campbell's lack of remorse that persuaded them to find him guilty of public humiliation, offenses against the person and emotional abuse.

Grizz wasn't relieved. He felt bad, awful even. He felt everyone judging him, speaking about him behind his back, wondering if Grizz would also execute him in cold blood like he had with Dewey. Being reminded of the last judgment made him wanna puke and he pleaded Sam to get him out of this church. The deaf boy helped him on his feet and froze when they passed Campbell. The latter whispered something in Grizz's ears, for them only to share.

"It's not over, you won't kill me like you did with your father and Dewey, Grizz. Even though you're a killer, the town won't forgive you a second time. You can't do anything against me, as long as I live you'll never get rid of me, faggot." he whispered, smiling viciously.

Grizz couldn't move anymore. He froze, his father's accident coming back in his mind while reliving Dewey's cruel and awful execution at the same time and remembering the accusative glares the whole town had given him after it. His heart was about to explode and he began hyperventilating again. Sam grabbed his shoulders and forced him to get out of the oppressive audience. He tried to calm him down on their way home but his lover was still shaking like a leaf.

When they got home, Grizz was emotionally drained.

Allie and the others were already planing the power removal.

" _He's got no idea what's in store for him, this asshole_." she thought.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry it took me so long to update, I had exams and couldn't really find the time to write. 
> 
> Hope you liked it !


	33. Setback

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The town of New Ham is no perfect town and it's citizens can be unpredictably mean to each other, as in any other society.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello everyone, I'm so sorry to have been absent for such a long time, but I had exams and stuff !  
> Now I'm on holidays so I'll be able to update almost daily :))))
> 
> Hope you like it !

"I don't wanna go out there."

Grizz stood frozen in front of his bedroom's door.

"Why is that so, love?" Sam signed slowly to him.

"I can't go out there. Not after the trial, not after everything." He said, shaking his head.

"Come on, Grizz, everything's gonna be fine. There's nothing to be afraid of now, the whole town recognized Campbell as the one hurting you, they don't judge you."

"You don't understand, Sam…Right here with you, I'm a strong young cherished man but once I step outside, I suddenly become an outcast, the poor little beaten child. I can't stand people pitying me, I'm sick of it. I don't want them to see me as someone weak or vulnerable. I know that they don't judge me, it's just…Now that everybody knows the whole truth, I'm kinda ashamed and embarrassed." he whispered the end.

"Honey, look at me" he lifted his chin up.

"Look at me. If you feel strong and cherished here, then you're gonna be the exact same strong and cherishedman out there, period. People love you, Grizz. You're doing so much for this town. They don't wanna pity you, they're just worried about you. Just as I am. Have you ever felt like I pitied you and saw you as a poor beaten child?"

"No, never…"

"Then there's no reason for you to feel that towards them. It's gonna be fine, maybe it's even for the best. People are finally gonna see how hard you're working and how wonderful you truly are. You're nothing near weak, Grizz, and everybody knows it. With everything you've gone through, any weak boy would have just given up. You didn't. You never did and everybody understands that. It's even the opposite from what you think, people knowing about your past is just another way for them to see how strong you are. Trust me, trust yourself and trust them. We're in this together, we won't let you down, love."

"What if it's the other way around and that people just think I deserved it or that I liked it cause I'm gay. What if they judge me cause I love a man, I don't..."

"Grizz. Stop freaking out. I love you, I'm here with you and I promise you everything's gonna be fine."

"Thank you, hun. What would I do without you, huh?" he said cheerfully.

"Actually, probably make out with Luke or something." he laughed.

"Wha?! No!" they giggled together before exchanging a loving kiss.

Grizz was amazed by Sam's facility to make him smile when just a few minutes before he could have cried from stress and anxiety. His words always found their way to his heart and reassured him deeply. But it was his kisses that gave him the power he needed to go on.

When they went downstairs, Allie and Luke were chatting in the living room. The day before, they had planned Campbell power's removal with Erika while he rested. He felt so useless but knew that he needed this time to compose himself.

"Hey guys, we were about to head to church to announce Campbell's punishment, you coming with us?" Allie asked.

"Yeah, just let me grab some coffee." Grizz answered in a neutral way.

He really didn't want to see Campbell right now, but he knew running away from the matter would only make him worst. He took a deep breath and refused to be hurt by his previous words, knowing that if fear made it to his mind, the bastard would have won in the end.

"Let's go."

 

"Faggot!"

When Grizz heard the insult, he didn't recognize Campbell's hoarse voice. He turned around and suddenly felt a small slap on top of his head. A group of random guys passed behind him on bikes, laughing and congratulating the one who insulted him. Grizz was astonished. He stopped in his tracks, making Sam notice that something had happened.

"Is there something wrong, love?" he asked him, smiling.

"Huh…No, no, everything's fine." he reassured his loving boyfriend.

" _No need for him to know that some people are being assholes._ " he thought.

Sam eyed the group of bikers before following his lover in the church. When they entered, some people ran to them, asking Grizz if he knew what was gonna happen to Campbell, if he was the one who'll do the job, if he was gonna kill him like he did with Dewey, etc.

Grizz couldn't believe his own hears. He thought people would have forgotten about Dewey and the role he had played in his execution. But gossip never forgets. He tried to make his way to the front of the church where Campbell, Allie and the Guard were waiting for him but there was so many people asking him all sorts of things. He didn't even know them, why did they want to know so badly about him, about his life or responsibilities?

Sam helped by pushing the crowd away from him, fighting his way to the front. The deaf boy didn't really understand the commotion, people were talking too fast and hidden for him to understand. He thought that the whole town was supporting Grizz in it's on way.

When he finally arrived by Allie's side, Grizz turned around and saw a dozen persons holding signs against executions and death punishment.

" _Does literally everybody think I asked for Campbell to be killed…?! Do they really take me for a murderer? For someone who kills everyone that stands in his way or insult him?_ "

"Faggot!" someone screamed in the middle of the crowd.

Grizz's eyes widened and Becca asked him to sit down.

She knew they had to do this fast if they didn't want the whole town insulting and embarrassing Grizz. She really didn't understand the crowd's actions at first but then she thought about it. People had been shocked during the last trial to see the accused sentenced to death. They all associated the Guard but especially Grizz to this execution and she now understood that people saw this trial as a remake of Dewey's. The Guard and Allie attacking someone to court and ending killing the guy, that's what people anticipated, and they wouldn't let it happen this time.

Grizz was the only vulnerable part of the trial they all could take their frustrations on. It now made sense to her that he would become the number one target to everybody's resentment about the Dewey's case. Add to that just a hint of homophobia and fear of differences and here we are with a rude cocktail of wickedness. The haters had all cards in hands. Not entirely assumed and brand new sexuality, dark and taboo past, lies and shame, Grizz was the perfect candidate to be dismantled by social opinion.

"Pussy!" someone else screamed.

"Dick sucker!" a guy laughed.

"Whore!" a woman yelled.

"Stop!" Allie intervened.

Grizz stared into nothing, completely frozen in his seat. The hurtful feelings were really painful for him because of his power but the shock he felt because of these heinous words was much more alarming. He thought that people would understand, that people would accept him with his past, his sexuality, his own self. But they didn't. They insulted him, casting him away, making him a pariah.

"We're gonna announce Campbell's sentence now." Allie added.

Everybody went silent and Grizz's heart began to pound in his chest.

"Campbell Eliot is sentenced to a power removal. The council decided to use an anonymous power to help us solve this case. Campbell's destructive power will be completely removed from him."

The crowd became agitated. Nobody had expected that. They didn't insult Grizz anymore, understanding that the boy didn't wanna kill his every opposant but just claimed justice. Hurtful comments about his sexuality were still thrown in the air from time to time but nothing as bad as a few minutes ago.

"What the fuck?! You can't do that, this power is mine and you can't take it away from me!" Campbell yelled.

"Yes we can and we will. You power will be sealed in a stone that will be protected by the Guard. Your power will remain in the stone and you will recover it if you behave well long enough. In the mean time, you'll have to live without it." Allie explained.

"You!" Campbell turned to Grizz.

"It's your fault, you faggot!" he shouted, jumping on him.

Campbell punched him just one time to knock him out and began to choke him on the floor. Grizz tried to free himself but Campbell straddled him and made sure he wouldn't be able to move anymore.

Feeling the Guard beginning to grab him, Campbell made one last move and lifted Grizz by the collar before hitting his head very hard on the church's cold ground.

Luke and Jason managed to snatch him away before noticing a small puddle of blood forming under their friend's head.

"Grizz!" Sam screamed, running to his unconscious boyfriend.

Kelly joined them too, instructing Gordie to run to the hospital to get her what she needed to stop the bleeding.

The crowd went wild with the altercation. The last things Grizz heard were homophobic insults, Campbell's shouting and Sam's muffled cries.

 

When he woke up, people were yelling at each other in the room across his. Apparently, Kelly had settled him at Allie's place. He recognized Sam's little voice, Luke's powerful one, Becca and Allie.

"How can you pretend to be able to protect him when you can't even prevent Campbell from smashing his head against the ground?! Becca yelled, furious.

"Becca, don't take this on Luke! He did everything he could, the real problem was the crowd." Sam interrupted.

"Yeah, the people were uncontrollable and uneducated tonight. Taking Grizz as a target, such cowards!" Allie added.

"Oh and why do you think they took him as a target, Allie, huh?! Maybe because you made him kill fucking Dewey back then and that everybody knew about it! You were so proud to have him listen to you that you made sure the whole town clearly understood he was the one to do it!" Becca said completely furious.

"I never asked them to behave like that towards him!" she tried to defend herself.

"No, you only served him on a silver platter, showing them clearly who to blame for this shitty situation!" Sam joined.

"What's done is done, alright?! I'm sorry, there's nothing I can do about it now, what I can do is trying to prevent that from ever happening again. We have to add security mesures to manifestations like that. This trial was a disaster, Grizz is the victim and yet he was the one targeted by haters." Allie tried to calm things down.

"And how do you suppose we do that, Allie?!" Luke screamed again.

"Do you think the Guard can do everything?! We're no fucking god, we're no fucking professionals! We can't try to protect the accused, the victim, the whole town and on top of that make the security of every manifestation! Grizz has even to keep his job at the Guard in addition to his hospital duties because we're not numerous enough!"

"Yeah, I understand, but…"

"The real problem here isn't the Guard or the town's organization! The real issue here is the people's fucking behavior!" Becca added.

"Come on, Bec, it wasn't that bad. They just asked him some questions cause they're curious. The last trial was shocking for everybody, we can only understand that this time, they want to have something to say to the final decision." Sam tried to calm her down.

"Sam, I'm sorry to say that, but you didn't hear what they said. The insulted Grizz! They called him _Faggot_  or _Dick sucker_  for God's sake! I even heard some of them cheering for Campbell when he was choking your boyfriend to the ground! People are not curious, Sam! They want him to suffer, because they didn't like the way we did things last time. Grizz was in the front line at the time and now he's paying the price for it."

Sam couldn't believe what Becca had just signed to him. People had insulted Grizz about his sexuality? He himself had been insulted by his brother a lot because of this but people had always been quite understanding in general.

It was the first time that Sam understood how hard it must have been for Grizz to come out. People expected him to be a straight dude, playing football and drinking beer. Now that he had fully come out because of him, Grizz had to defend his reputation everyday and put up with such hatred.

The deaf boy felt as if he had betrayed his lover. He had promised him that things were gonna be fine and that people wouldn't judge him because of his past or his sexual orientation. But they did, badly. They accused him of being a whore because of what his father had done to him, they insulted him, dragging him into the mud.

 

Lost in thoughts, Sam walked slowly to Grizz's room, finding his boyfriend awake and crying, curled up in his bed.

"Grizz…Grizz, I'm so sorry." Sam reached to him, on the verge of crying too.

"Sam…?" he answered, turning to face his lover.

"Please, make them stop yelling...I'm sorry, I promise I'll do better, but don't fight because of me...please." Grizz sobbed, putting his hands on his hurting head.

Sam went to the door to close it slowly, blocking the now muffled screams.

"It's okay now, hun." he sat on their bed.

"I'm so sorry it didn't go as I told you…" Sam went on, embarrassingly looking away.

"It's not your fault, love." Grizz managed to say between sobs.

"I'm sorry you have to put up with all this hatred because you're in love with me…" he whispered.

"Sam. You never have to apologize for loving me and for making me love you. Those people are assholes and what they say and think hurts me, but never will I ever regret loving you and coming out for you. Never, you hear me?"

"Yeah, alright. I'm sorry you have to go through this though. I know they're also using your past against you just to show that they disapprove the last trial, that's not fair."

"It's not, but it's fine. I was the one to kill Dewey, it's only natural for them to point at the murderer to show their disapprobation."

"You're no murderer, Grizz."

"But I'm not innocent either."

"Stop it. I know how you feel about this and I know there's nothing I could say that would change your mind, but please, don't give up. What they're doing is wrong and wether or not they have reasons to turn their anger at you, nobody should be disregarded because of their sexuality."

Will barged into the room.

"Grizz! I'm sorry to interrupt and I know you're hurt, but you should come downstairs, we're waiting for you to…" he said, panting.

"Are you kidding me, Will? Grizz is in no state to go anywhere. I don't know what's happening downstairs and I don't care, he's not moving from here." Sam interrupted.

"We're about to take Campbell's power away." Will finished.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yeah, I made the whole town turn into a huge bastard, sorry for that.


	34. Fight for Tolerance

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Campbell power is removed and they all have a little talk about the trial.

"Let's go." Grizz stood up weakly.

"Grizz, you really shouldn't…"

"Sam, thank you for worrying but I'm fine, I just hit my head a bit too hard. I need to be there to see the power removal and wear the pendant." he told him calmly but firmly.

They followed Will downstairs where Erika was waiting with Campbell, Jason, Allie, Luke and Becca.

"Hey Grizz, how are you feeling, buddy?" Luke inquired.

"Better, thanks." his gaze met Campbell's.

"We're doing this at my dad's wine cellar, Helena is meeting us there. Campbell, you ready to go?"

"I'm not going anywhere with you freaks." he snapped at Luke.

"We'll see about that" Jason said, grabbing Campbell's handcuffed hands and pushing him toward the exit.

Grizz didn't say a single word. He watched the guys bringing him to the car, Allie giving the last instructions to Erika, the latter showing him the pendant he will be responsible of.

"You okay, hun?" Sam asked him.

"Yes, of course." he told him, trying to sound as detached as he wished he actually was.

They all joined Helena at Luke's and brought Campbell downstairs, locking him in the glazed room.

"I only want Luke, Erika, Grizz and myself in this room. Campbell is maybe a criminal, but he deserves discretion and dignity." Allie said.

"Do you think it's a good idea for Grizz to be there? Last time Campbell was near him, he smashed his head against the ground…" Helena asked.

"I'm fine, Helena." Grizz answered.

"Are you s…" Allie inquired.

"I said I'm fine." he interrupted coldly.

Grizz walked downstairs with the pendant between his fingers, followed by Luke, Erika and finally Allie. They walked into the wine cellar and Luke grabbed immediately Campbell before he could even insult Grizz.

"You try to make even on move towards him and I dislocate your shoulder, am I clear?" he threatened.

"Alright, alright, I won't touch your faggot whore." he giggled.

"Luke, can you please hold him down and keep him from moving?" Erika asked shyly.

The quarterback pushed the Eliot brother to the ground, holding him by the shoulders. Campbell didn't even try to resist, he had already understood that there was nothing he could do to prevent this from happening. He only looked right at Grizz with hatred.

"I swear to God, Gareth Visser. I'm gonna make your life a living hell and you're gonna regret the time your sick father abused you compared to what I'm gonna do to you."

Grizz swallowed painfully, the anxiety of this threat taking his breath away.

"My name's Grizz, not Gareth." he whispered. 

He hated the name Gareth, the only one to have ever called him that was his father.

"There's so many other ways to hurt you than with my power, you know. With or without it, you're gonna suffer, badly. So be prepared, faggot." Campbell smiled devilishly.

Luke tightened his grip on the boy as the latter began laughing frenetically.

"Erika, do it." Grizz instructed, sick to the core after those menaces.

The timid girl held the pendant in one hand and place her other one on Campbell's chest. The latter was still laughing like a mad man. Erika closed her eyes, focused and the pendant suddenly glowed. Campbell stopped laughing at once.

"No…No! Stop it, you bitch! Grizz, make her stop! Right now! I'm gonna kill you, faggot, I swear to God!" he screamed.

"Shut the fuck up!" Luke yelled too.

A few seconds more and the stone stopped shining. Campbell was panting on the ground. Erika removed her hand from his chest and stood up, looking up at Grizz.

"Here you go, Grizz. You better hide this pendant if you don't want him to get his power back." she told him, smiling softly.

"Thank you, Erika. Thank you so much. You can go home if you want, now. Thank you again for doing that for me." Grizz greeted her.

Erika exited the room, going home for the day. Grizz walked up to Campbell and knelt down to be at his level.

"Are you feeling alright, Campbell?"

"Why you care, asshole? It's your fault if anything happens to me." he snapped at him.

"I know I'm the very reason for your state, Campbell. But I'm still head medic and even if you hurt me before, I can't ignore you if you're in pain. Feeling any physical discomfort? Do you have trouble breathing?"

"No." he answered coldly, looking away.

Luke helped him on his feet.

"I can stand on my own, bastard." he told Luke.

"Watch your words, Campbell." he answered, before leading him to the exit.

 

"Allie, I think we have to hold a meeting to discuss the trial." Grizz turned to his friend.

"What about the trial? Do you want to get back at them for insulting you?" she asked.

"I don't care that people insulted me. They were obviously frustrated with Dewey's trial and this one may also have caused tension in the town. We can't just ignore their opinion on the matter. They have rights and being able to vote for a suitable punishment is one of them."

"You're right. Do you want me to lead the meeting or do you wanna do it yourself?" Allie questioned carefully.

"If you don't mind, I want to do this myself." Grizz answered.

"Alright, but I'll have the Guard be extra aware of any dangerous move against you. People insulting you publicly is rude enough without someone attacking you physically."

"I'm on it." Luke added.

"Alright, thank you. Please tell everybody to gather at the church after dinner." Grizz said, walking away.

 

"What are you gonna tell them, love?" Sam signed to him when they were alone in their room.

"I'm gonna give them the floor. They have things to say apparently, so I'll let them speak up." he answered.

"What about you? I know you wanna talk with them about the trial and everything but are you gonna take revenge for this morning's insults?"

"I'm not. I won't respond to insults with more violence. What I'm gonna do is fight for _tolerance_. We're at the beginning of a new society, we can't let the same hate towards differences spread as it did in our previous world. We have a chance to make this right from the start, and no gay or lesbian is gonna be bullied in _my_ town."

"Are you sure? I mean…I think we're pretty much alone in this."

"Even if we are. We don't have to hide or to be ashamed of what we are because some of them still have archaic reactions."

"Alright, love. But please, be careful." Sam whispered, kissing him deeply.

"I will, don't worry. I'm gonna make this right, Sam. I'm gonna make them respect and accept us as we are, I swear." he gently smiled to him.

 

When the whole town had gathered in the church, Luke and Jason closed the doors to make sure that everybody would listen till the end. They then placed themselves around Grizz.

"Good evening everybody. Today, Campbell's punishment was announced and we saw that some of you weren't really happy with the way we decide which crime is worth which punishment. I talked with Allie and we decided that it was only fair for us to give you some place to speak up and give us your opinion on the matter." Grizz started.

"Why does it matter, now? You already killed somebody, murderer." someone spoke up.

Luke and Jason took a step towards Grizz, making sure the boy was safe.

"Look. Let's put the cards on the table. I know you all hold me responsible for Dewey's death and you're right to do so. I was the one to kill him but you know what? I have to wake up every morning hating myself for it. You all blame me for this but do you have any idea how hard _I_ blame myself?" Grizz said vigorously.

"Grizz, you should sto…" Luke put his hand on his shoulder.

"No, Luke. This is necessary." he told his best friend, getting away from his reassuring grip.

"You wanna insult me? You wanna blame me? Please help yourself. I'm here, I'm listening." he then addressed the audience.

Nobody dared to talk.

"Well, then. Don't you have something to say? You were all pretty loud this morning though." he waited a few seconds in tense silence before moving on.

"Do you think I wanted to kill him? Do you think I enjoyed this? It was hell. But I did it in anyway. I could blame Allie for making me do this shit, but I don't. I won't, ever, cause I was the one pulling the trigger, she wasn't. Allie made a hard decision, probably one of the hardest of her whole life, and as someone who encouraged her to take the lead of this town, I respect her choice. Was it right, was it wrong? I don't know. What I know is that we had to do something and we tried to do what was the best for everyone. You all blame me, you blame Allie, but what would _you_ have done?"

Still no sound to be heard.

"Letting Dewey go, you'll all have barricaded yourself in your houses, afraid of going out, knowing this town lets killers walk in peace. There was no real way to organize a prison or something like that. So, what was the solution? There was no good choice, only bad ones. Allie and the Guard decided to take the responsibility to live with a murder on their conscience, only to make you safe. We did that so you wouldn't have to. So that you'd be safe and feel in security."

People looked away in shame when they made eye contact with Grizz.

"So, please go on. Blame me. Blame us. But next time, come to us with solutions. If you're better than us, we'll listen to your offers with real interest."

"Grizz is right." Allie stepped in.

"What do you think insulting someone like you did this morning is gonna do? We have to survive here, we don't have the luxury to act like spoiled children. If you have something to say, you know were I live and I'll gladly listen to anything you have to offer. But insulting Grizz like that, aren't you ashamed of yourself?! My sister gave her life for this town. I can't imagine what she'd say if she saw how you guys behave." she said, looking at the audience disappointedly.

"He's only a fucking faggot!" some guy shouted.

Nobody talked, shocked that someone had dared to keep up with the homophobic insults. Grizz waited a few seconds before stepping in again.

"What's the problem with it? Is it me personally? Is it my sexuality? If I was straight, would you approve of my doings?" he asked the whole audience.

Nobody answered.

"Till not so long ago, I wouldn't have cared less about you judging me over my sexuality cause I never planned on seeing any of you ever again. But now, we're stuck here, together. We have to build a new society and as much as I want to go home, we may have to actually live here. But you know what? I'm glad we're here. We're at the beginning of everything here. We're the basis of a new way of thinking, a new way of living. I'm glad to be here with you all and I can't wait to discover what we're gonna be able to accomplish together. I wanna laugh here, live here, love here. I wanna have children one day and be proud of raising them in a brand new society, away from all the war and all the violence." he smiled at Becca, thinking about the future mother.

"But I refuse to let our children be born in a society where hatred and fear of differences are accepted and emphasized." Grizz went on.

He now had everybody's full attention.

"George Takei once said _We should indeed keep calm in the face of differences, and live our lives in a state of inclusion and wonder at diversity of humanity_." he smiled to the audience.

"Differences are to be celebrated. I love the fact that I'm different from the person at my side and that we all have something unique. We are individuals, but doesn't life get much more beautiful if we all take a step back? I'm looking at you all and I'm seeing wonderful and interesting persons but when I look at this audience in general, what I see are friendships, affection, love, respect. No matter who you like, who you share your bed with and love, you're all so beautiful and unique. How can you not see what I see?"

Grizz had almost tears in his green eyes.

"I love a man. He's an amazing strong human and I'm so happy to be by his side. I'm not ashamed of him, I'm not ashamed of us. I'm proud to be the man I am now thanks to him. And isn't that sufficient? As other human beings, why do you need to think beyond that? I'm happy, period. The one making me happy is none of your business and just by his capacity of making me feel loved and cherished, you all should respect him."

"I've always considered you as my friends, I try to work so hard to protect you all. But as Alice Walker said, _no person is your friend who demands your silence, or denies your right to grow and be perceived as fully blossomed as you were intended_. I endured your judgment and your insults for a long time now and I'm sick of staying silent. I know that I'm not the only homosexual in this town and I call all the others to step up and speak up. I myself put up with this homophobic bullshit for much too long, but it's over. I'm not gonna stand by and watch this town turn into the same horror our ancestors built."

Suddenly, Bean stood up, crying. She stayed there and looked at the audience before opening her mouth slowly.

"I'm a lesbian woman and I'm proud to speak up." she said, eyes still full of tears.

A wide emotional smile appeared on Grizz's face. The room was silent but he started clapping his hands. He looked at Bean right in the eyes, acknowledging her courage and immense braveness. All heads turned to him as he clapped louder and louder. Sam joined him and applauded Bean's courage by his side. Gently, more and more people clapped their hands and very quickly, the whole room was cheering her and congratulating her. The poor girl couldn't stop crying, seeing that even the people that insulted Grizz earlier had also joined the movement. When the clapping slowed down, she went on.

"My religion and the social pressure always prevented me from coming out, but as Grizz said, here, there's no one to dictate us how to think, what to accept and what to banish. We can make this place an open-minded society where every human being can find a place that is his and not something other decided for him. I believe in this dream. Thank you, Grizz. Thank you for opening our eyes and for speaking about all the taboo." she shyly smiled to him.

"Thank _you_ , Bean. You're so brave and strong, you're an exemple for everybody here. We're not building our society on taboo and unsaid. We have to talk about everything. We have to talk about sexuality, about harassment, rape and abuse. It's not always gonna be fun or comfortable, but that's what it takes to get out of our previous hateful habits."

"Thank you, Grizz, for being the first citizen of New Ham to have exposed yourself by speaking about all those hard subjects. You were outed by Campbell but agreed to tell us everything at your trial and now you're fighting for free sexuality. You were the first one to speak up, thank you for that." the girl told him.

Grizz had no words to show her how grateful he was for her compliments, so he decided to quote Harvey Fierstein.

" _Never be bullied into silence. Never allow yourself to be made a victim. Accept no one's definition of your life; define yourself._ " he smiled to her.

"You're a real model for us and I hope my children will grow up quoting all your philosophical non-sense." Bean laughed softly before applauding him.

All of a sudden, a few people stood up, clapping in their hands. They all mumbled little "Thank you." and soon the whole room was filled with cheering, applause and laugh.

Grizz couldn't be happier, but Sam walked to him, grabbing his face and kissing him deeply.

The crowd caught fire in a standing ovation and encouraged the couple, sometimes whistling at them cheerfully.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter was written for Pride's week, hope you enjoyed !
> 
> Long life to Free Sexuality !


	35. Support

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sharing and supporting are the first steps to recovery.

Lots of people later came to see Grizz at Allie's place to apologize for their behavior. He always took the time they needed to discuss things quietly and tried to understand their reasons. Most of them just went with the mood, without really having any bad intentions. In the end, they were all grateful for the open-mindedness that had gained town after the last meeting. People were more open about their feelings, their past, and even asked Grizz to start a support group for victims of harassment and abuse. Even if he was really surprised by all the requests to open such a club, Becca and him organized the sessions.

At the first meeting, they were impressed to welcome so many young women.

"Hello everyone! First, welcome. I'm glad you all decided to seek help on this hard matter and I'll try my best to make you feel better. I'm sorry to see so many faces here because of the nature of this meeting but I'm also grateful that you all took the initiative to speak up about it." Grizz started.

"And thank you Grizz for taking this other job in addition to all your other duties." Becca added.

"You're very welcome." he answered, smiling.

"Before we begin, I just wanna clear some things. First of all, this group's goal is tolerance, sharing and support. You have to be extra aware that nobody will ever judge you here and I will personally get rid of anyone who's here to discriminate or mock the others. Secondly, you have to understand that I'm no expert or therapist. I'm still struggling with this on my own, so you have to understand that I won't have all the answers you're looking for and that I may need this group just as much as you do." he gave a sad smile.

"I'm here as a member of the support club but I'm also in charge of all the administrative and organizational part so that Grizz doesn't have to do everything alone. If you have any question regarding the meetings, come to me and we'll find solutions. We can give you documents of participation if the sessions take place at the same time as your job for example." Becca added.

"Thanks, Bec." he addressed the future mom.

"If everything's clear for you, then we'll begin todays session. First I want you all to introduce yourself. I know that we're all here for similar reasons and that we have to talk about it, but just for now, I don't want you to introduce yourself by telling us what happened to you in the past. Abuse and harassment don't define you as a person, they maybe made you who you are now, but they don't determine the person you want to be." Grizz looked at every single participant to be sure they all got the message.

"I'll go first. My name's Grizz, well, Gareth, but we'll talk about that another time, and my hobbys are singing, playing the violin and learning ASL for my amazing boyfriend. I also danced and played football before but I can't anymore because of my heart condition. My job in this town is making sure you're all safe and unharmed with the Guard and I'm also head medic at the clinic." he smiled cheerfully at the shy participants.

"Who wants to go now?" he asked.

"I will. Hello, I'm Maddison and I really like drawing. That's something I never told anyone but I guess that I can share that with you here. I help Will at the kitchen with my heat power and I try to grow more vegetables with Gwen." she smiled to the assembly.

"I'm next! Hey there, I'm Becca and as you can see, I'm the first future mother of New Ham. Right now, I don't really have any fix job cause I get tired easily with the baby but I guess we can say that I'm Grizz's assistant in a way." she laughed with the others.

"I help him whenever he needs me cause this idiot is too kind to say no every time someone asks him to do something. Oh and I'm his second ASL teacher." she winked at the boy.

The twelve young women introduced themselves before Grizz talked again.

"Well, I'm really happy to welcome you all here and I can't wait to know and discover more about you. I don't wanna know _only_ about your trauma, you're all beautiful interesting women and what I'm searching for here is much more than just a self pitying group." everybody nodded at this.

"Now, we're gonna make a tour to have everybody talk about the reason they're here. You are under no obligation to provide details or names, but I think this exercise will allow you to be able to state clearly what happened to you. It will help you accept and acknowledge it. We're all going to do it today and next time we'll listen to you individually, comfort and advise you. You'll soon see that you're not alone in this and it's very likely that you'll find someone here who has experienced something very similar to your own story." he added.

Nobody talked, they were all listening carefully to Grizz. Nobody wanted to go first, of course. As they hit the real subject, they all were more shy all of a sudden and counted on Grizz to make the first step.

"I'll go first. Grizz, you don't have to always be the one to expose yourself." Becca said, laying her hand on his shoulder. She had sensed the boy being more and more pressured to reveal his past before the others.

"Thanks, Becca." he answered, smiling nervously.

"Hum, I really don't know how to start this so I'll just say it straight, no filter. I was at a party at Kelly's house and I wasn't really enjoying, because my friends were nowhere to be seen. Her father came to me with a glass of whiskey, asking me if I wanted to talk about more interesting stuff in private. I've always had a crush on older men so I thought " _Why not just speak for a while_ ". We went into his office and we had a great time, we talked, laughed and became closer. He tried to make a move on me, but he was Kelly's father so I just pushed him away. He smiled, telling me that I didn't have a real choice and I began feeling dizzy. I collapsed because of the drug he had put in my drink and the bastard had his way…" she whispered the end.

Everybody was very touched by her sincerity and mumbled little _I'm sorry_.

"Thank you, Becca. I'm sorry this happened to you and I'm glad you were able to talk to us about it. What happened wasn't your fault in _any_ way, even if you " _have a crush on older men_ ". I'm speaking for everybody in this room when I say that we admire you for keeping the child and loving this baby despite the awful circumstances of the conception. Thank you again for your honesty." Grizz told her with the warmest smile she had ever seen.

Becca felt so loved and supported at this moment. She suddenly knew for sure that she could trust this amazing man with her life and that she would never ever betray him. She felt so safe, so beautiful and strong by his side. She wasn't even jealous of Sam cause the relationship she had with the young violinist was one of pure respect and brotherhood.

"Thank you, Grizz, everybody. I never told anyone because I was ashamed and because it was Kelly's father, but now I'm really glad I did. Just saying it and knowing you're here for me is a real relief." she said, tears in her eyes.

The other girls talked about their abuse and harassment. They all had complete different stories and Grizz couldn't believe how those men, those mothers and parents could have hurt such beautiful strong women. He knew that this club was supposed to show them the bright side of sharing and to allow them to feel supported but he felt so bad about all this evil side of human being that he was almost feeling sick. He perceived every sad and hurt emotion they emitted when they revived those memories and had to focus not to give in to all this pain.

After they all had given away some of their sufferings by sharing their story, it was now his turn and even if he had already been exposed by Campbell and the whole trial thing, he felt so nervous and stressed. His heart suddenly began throbbing in his chest and he closed his eyes, trying to ease his breathing.

"It's alright, Grizz. We don't judge you, we accept you and your past. You're safe with us." Becca whispered to him, rubbing his back.

"Yeah, sorry…" he half smiled apologetically.

"So, hum, when I was young, my mother died in a car accident and my father blamed me for that. He began hitting me everyday for years. I tried to escape but he threatened to do the same to my friends, there was no way out. I could have delivered him to the cops but I couldn't lose him too, not after my mother's death. He was my father and despite everything, I still loved him and wished he would change." he stopped for a few seconds, careful not to begin hyperventilating from anxiety.

"One day, he came home, sober for once, and hit me like he always did. But this time I felt his hands stopping longer on my body and he was surprisingly more tactile than usual." he stopped again, trying really hard not to cry at the memories.

"He raped me. That night was the worst one, I guess, cause I gave up on any hope of ever finding happiness in my life. After that, the rapes and beatings became usual and I turned into some sort of tool for him to release his anger on. When he lost all my mother's money at the Casino, he tried to kill us both but ended up in a coma." he looked up crying, seeing worried and sorry faces.

"After the accident, my life became so easier and happier that I still hate myself for feeling relieved he tried to kill himself." he tried to smile to reassure the girls, but they saw right through his pretending.

"I somehow thought I had made peace with all this, but I was just in denial. Lately, I was again forced to face reality because of Campbell and I discovered that the bastard had recorded everything." he laughed bitterly.

"This fucking asshole recorded every single rape, every single beating." he said harshly, looking down and biting his lower lip.

"I don't know what's worst…Everything he did to me, humiliating me, abusing me, or the fact that he still manages to make me suffer so much even without physically being here. As soon as I think that I can finally be happy, he resurfaces to ruin my life again and again." he sobbed.

"I'm sorry, I shouldn't get so worked up and I said that we didn't have to give details and everything, but…"

"It's fine, Grizz. Get it out, you need this more than anyone, given all the shit you had to put up with lately." a girl gently told him.

"She's right, it's alright to let it out, we're here for you." another one said.

"We're sorry your father did all those things to you and that he still has so much impact on your actual life. But you don't have to live in the shadow of your past anymore, Grizz. Everything's gonna be alright now, we're here for you. You can finally get rid of all this pain and definitely throw him away from your life. We're all at a fresh start here, take this chance to free yourself from his hold. He's not in control anymore, you are." Becca smiled softly to him.

All the girls stood up and walked slowly to him. They knelt down to his level and cuddled him. Every single one of them joined the movement, surrounding him with their moral support and sincere love.

"Thank you, thank you…" he cried in the collective supportive hug.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Another sad chapter, so sorry... But at least, Logan's grasp on Grizz's life will finally be over.
> 
> We'll find Grizzam again next chapter, with a really cute and lovely chapter (I hope Hahahah) :))))
> 
> Hope you liked it !


	36. Never Enough

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> First Becca's baby's about to arrive and in a second part, some Grizzam.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Song coming up during this chapter, help yourself to feel even more in the mood :)))
> 
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=E73MELOo0d8

Everything slowly settled down and the city was finally back to normal. Well, as normal as a freaking parallel universe city can be. People went on with their jobs, their hobbys. A lot of clubs had popped all around town and everybody was now sharing their feelings, sensibility and skills for the common good. Luke and Jason had formed an "official" football team and Gordie had opened a chess club, trying to get Grizz to stop by almost everyday.

The young man had sadly little to no free time because of all his duties. He was still head medic and helped with the Guard. But on top of those jobs, Grizz also leaded the support group, the forest group, gave dance lessons with his lover, tried to learn ASL and advised Allie on her leading duties. Needless to say, the man was really busy. Sam on the other hand took care of the library and gave dance classes with him. He was always trying to get his lover to take breaks or come eat with him but their time together was often cut short by the Guard, Kelly or Allie asking him for guidance.

Grizz was even more busy at the clinic those days because Becca was about to have her baby. He helped her by taking the pain of the contractions as Kelly treated other occasional patients.

One morning, he was woken up by Kelly running to his bedroom.

"Grizz! I'm sorry to intrude and to wake you up like this but the baby's coming!" she screamed.

"Wha…Okay, I'm on it." he said, getting out of Sam's loving and warm embrace.

He dressed up as quickly as he could and entered his old house, now remastered into a clinic, ten minutes later.

"Grizz? Grizz, the baby's coming, it hurts so much!" Becca cried to him.

"I'm here, Bec, I'm here." he told her, sitting beside her bed.

"Gordie, can you please bring us lots of towels, sterile vessels to put the medical instruments and warm water, please?" Kelly asked, setting everything she'd need to get this baby out.

"Becca, listen to me, girl. Kelly's gonna bring your baby out, you'll have to listen to her very carefully, alright? I'm gonna stay here by your side and take all the pain away. We don't have any anesthetic or dilators so I'll take care of the pain for you. Your job is to focus on what Kelly will tell you and get this baby out, okay? You think you can manage that?" he gently told her.

"Y…Yeah, I can do that." she breathed.

When she was ready to give birth, Grizz focused his attention on her belly and his hands began glowing. He felt great pain but accepted it, knowing that it was only the beginning. Kelly did everything she could to get this baby out and succeed after five hours of hard work.

"Congratulation, Becca, it's a beautiful little girl." she smiled tiredly to the mom, handing the small child over.

"Thank you Kelly ! I'm gonna name her Eden." she joyfully laughed.

She had felt no pain during the whole thing, only slight discomfort. She hadn't seen how many time had passed but was too happy to even care. She suddenly felt the warmth of Grizz's hands slip from her belly and turned to the young man.

Grizz fell from his chair and collapsed on the floor. He had never taken so much pain and even less for five hours straight. He was panting on the floor, burning up and sweating when Kelly ran to him.

"Gordie, can you prepare a bed for him, cold water and get Sam, please?" she asked him with a composed face.

The young medic had clearly expected this. She knew how painful a childbirth could be and knowing that Grizz would want to take all the pain from Becca, it was no surprise to see him in such a state. She gently moved him into a seated position.

"Grizz, you think you could take a few steps to get to your bed or should I get Luke to carry you?" she softly asked him.

"No, I think I can walk…Sorry, Kelly, I'm just really tired." he apologized.

"Don't be, you must be exhausted. Becca and the baby are alright, so we'll take care of you now." she told him smiling.

"Can…can you tell Sam I'll be fine? He's gonna worry for sure…" he said, before passing out.

"Oh my God, Grizz I'm so sorry…Kelly, is there something I can do?" Becca asked worriedly.

"It's fine, I'll get Luke to carry him. Just enjoy being with you baby, Grizz'll be fine." Kelly reassured her.

Luke came ten minutes later, as soon as his shift with the Guard was over.

"Where is he? What happened, is he okay?" he questioned Gordie.

"Becca had her baby, he took her pain during the five hours of delivery so he's completely drained." he comforted him.

They walked in the quiet room, Kelly was on the floor, waiting patiently next to an unconscious Grizz. She had placed pillows under his head and fresh clothes on his forehead. He seemed to be in pain, breathing heavily when Luke kneeled in front of him.

"Becca, congratulations for your baby! Kelly, where do you want me to put him?" he addressed the two calm women.

"Put him on the bed next room, any news from Sam?" she turned to Gordie.

"I'm here." Sam said, running to the little group, looking for his lover.

"Becca, your baby's beautiful! Congratulations, babe." he smiled to his best friend, kissing her on the forehead.

"Thank you, Sam. She's a little girl, I named her Eden like you advised me to. I'm so sorry, Grizz took all my pain and now…" she looked down next to her bed.

Sam followed her gaze and was horrified to see what state his boyfriend was in. He was so pale, looking almost dead on the cold floor. Grizz was having a hard time breathing and was trembling, shaking as a leaf.

"Oh my God, honey…" he kneeled down to him, next to Kelly and Luke.

He wasn't angry or anything, knowing this must have been necessary for a childbirth with no doctor or medical supplies.

Luke picked the passed out boy from the ground and placed him in a bed. They all left him and Sam alone and went to Becca to congratulate her. The two patients stayed at the clinic a few days, having all sorts of visitors. Curious people came to see the baby and congratulate the young mother, Allie dropped by almost every day to see Grizz and Sam always stayed by his side.

Grizz woke up two days later, dizzy and completely lost. He looked around him and found Becca, holding her cute baby and gently whispering to him on a rocking chair. The sight was a true blessing and Grizz was so grateful to have been able to help this wonderful event.

"Congratulation, girl." he smiled softly to her.

"Grizz, you're awake! Thank you so much ! How are you feeling, does it hurt anywhere?" she asked him, still rocking her baby to sleep.

"I'm fine, still a bit dizzy and nauseous, but otherwise I'm alright, thanks."

"Thank you so much for everything you did for me."

"You're very welcome, hun. I'm so happy you're both fine." he smiled, looking at the tiny child.

"Well, we're both grateful. Let me introduce you to my little girl. Eden, this is uncle Grizz. Uncle Grizz, this little beauty is Eden." she laughed to him.

The young man slowly got out of bed and made his way to his friend on shaky legs.  
"Gosh, I had it pretty hard this time. I didn't think I'll end up this weak." he whispered to himself.

"Well, it was a five hours ride, no wonder you're exhausted. You slept for two whole days."

"Hey there, Eden." he giggled, stretching his hand to the little laughing baby. Eden griped his finger with her tiny hands and he felt his heart swell with warm love for this tiny pure being.

"You shouldn't be out of bed, love." Sam said, entering the room. He smiled softly to his boyfriend, relieved to finally find him awake after all this time.

"Sam, I'm so glad you're here." he answered, hugging his lover tightly.

"And I'm glad you regained consciousness, how are you feeling?"

"I still feel a little weak, but otherwise I'm fine." he signed, before kissing him.

"Oh, please, guys. I don't want you to already compromise my baby with your dirty stuff." she laughed.

 

A few weeks passed and Becca had already found a routine with her baby. Winter was still fully spreading but the whole town was boiling with excitement at the coming of Valentine's Day. Sam wanted to cook a wonderful meal for his boyfriend and organize a quiet romantic evening but Grizz was really busy and wasn't feeling very well the previous morning so Sam dropped the idea. He hadn't heard from Grizz all day and was beginning to worry when Allie came to see him at the library.

"Hey Sam!" she greeted him cheerfully.

"Hey Allie, how are you?"

"I'm fine, thanks. I was just dropping by to ask you to come by the church just before dinner, there's something I want to discuss with you before we all head to our respective dates." she said seriously.

"Something's wrong?" he signed with a worried look.

"I just want to discuss a few timetable things with you, don't worry, nothing big." she answered lightly, before heading out.

"See you later Sam!"

"Yeah, see you."

 

When he opened the church's doors, Sam couldn't believe his own eyes. The whole church was lit by hundreds of candles, giving the sacred building an almost divine and unreal atmosphere. He looked up and saw Grizz standing in the middle of the hall. Behind him stood a single table, also lit by a radiant candle and covered in delicious looking dishes.

He walked up to his lover's level, mouth slightly opened in amazement.

" _How could I doubt my marvelous lover would have prepared something fantastic for Valentine's Day?_ " he thought to himself.

Grizz was waiting for him, smiling and looking at him with so much love. When he finally was in front of him, he began to sign something but was stopped by Grizz taking his hand and gently shushing him. Sam looked at his beautiful face and saw a multitude of colors emitting from him. Those specific colors only appeared when the handsome man sang. He looked at his lips to understand what this song was about but was amazed when Grizz's hands signed in sync with his lips.

" _I'm trying to hold my breath._

_Let it stay this way,_

_can't let this moment end._ "

Grizz was singing so warmly and signing with so much softness that it was like looking at a calming and reassuring scenery. Sam could feel every breath, every vibration coming from his boyfriend's voice and even if he couldn't technically hear him, he felt it resonate deep in his heart.

" _You set off a dream in me,_

_Getting louder now,_

_can you hear it echoing?_ "

He smiled softly at him, looking deeply into his glowing blue eyes. This moment was absolutely out of time and only exuded tenderness and delicacy. His hands were moving slowly, with the rhythm of his voice and the beating of his heart. Sam was mesmerized by this unbelievably delicate sight.

" _Take my hand._

_Will you share this with me?_ "

He sang softly, taking his lover's hand and signing with the other one.

" _Cause darling, without you…_

_All the shine of a thousand spotlights,_

_All the stars we steal from the night sky_

_Will never be enough, never be enough._ "

His voice got louder and his smile wider. It was as if Grizz was telling him a story, their story.

" _Towers of gold are still too little,_

_These hands could hold the world, but it'll_

_Never be enough, never be enough…_

_For me._ "

His signing got larger and his voice even stronger, letting out all the love he felt towards the wonderful ginger man.

" _Never, never !_

_Never, never !_

_For me, for me!_ "

Grizz was now singing his heart out and as unbelievable as it seemed for the deaf boy, Sam could suddenly hear just a slip of sound. His eyes got wide and he focused on this new sound, as if hearing for the first time. It was tiny but he was sure of it, he could hear Grizz's voice. He heard it, and it got louder and louder.

Grizz took over the chorus again with a powerful tone and his voice echoed on every single wall of the church. Sam didn't think this amazing man could get even more intense and sonorous but he did and his voice resonated in his before deaf ears.

" _All the shine of a thousand spotlights,_

_All the stars we steal from the night sky,_

_Will never be enough, never be enough !_

_Towers of gold are still too little,_

_These hands could hold the world, but it'll_

_Never be enough, never be enough,_

_For me !_ "

Sam felt tears slipping from his eyes. Never before had he heard more beautiful sounds, more meaningful lyrics, more intense voice. Just when he thought his life couldn't be any brighter, Grizz had succeeded, yet another time, in giving him even more. It felt as if he was finally whole. The other half of his soul was beautifully singing in front of him, so loud and so intensely that he had even broken through his sickness. The wonderful man had gone through all the trouble of learning the whole song in his language to be able to communicate in the easiest way imaginable.

When the song was over, Grizz lifted Sam's chin up and kissed him deeply. When they parted, he whispered inaudibly to his deaf lover.

"I love you, Sam Eliot."

The deaf boy didn't hear a single sound but he didn't need to hear it to feel it deep in his core.

"I love you too, Gareth Visser." he giggled, crying from happiness.

"Happy Valentine's Day, my love." he smiled lovingly to him.


	37. Hear me

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Smut chapter.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> WARNING Sexual content ahead

"You _heard_ …me?" Grizz shockingly asked his boyfriend.

Sam had suddenly started to cry at the end of the song, completely surprising him. When he had tried to understand the cause of this reaction, the deaf boy had sobbed that he had " _heard"_  his voice.

"You mean, you sensed me and all in your heart or did you actually _hear_ me?" he questioned him gently.

"No, it was you, Grizz. It was your voice. It was a sound, a real new sound." he smiled to him.

After the shocking outburst, Sam couldn't stop smiling. He had heard. After so many years passed in complete oppressive silence, he had heard. Even though he couldn't anymore and even if it was a one time thing, he couldn't be more grateful.

"Wha…How did that happen?" Grizz smiled back at his boyfriend.

"I don't know, you were singing and suddenly I started hearing little bits of sounds that matched your lips. They became louder and louder and I now am perfectly sure that I heard your voice."

"I'm so happy for you, love. I'm so proud of you!" Grizz giggled, kissing Sam.

"Thanks honey!" he laughed with him.

 

After all these emotions, the couple had one of the best night they ever had. They laughed all evening, spoke about a bright imaginary future and cuddled in bed but when it was time to sleep, Sam was completely awake.

"Grizz? Are you tired, love?"

"A bit, but I'm fine for now, why?" he turned to his loving boyfriend smiling.

Sam didn't give any other explanation and sealed his lips on his mouth. This kiss wasn't the usual goodnight one and Grizz knew exactly what it meant. Sam wanted to make love to him. He stopped him immediately, grabbing his shoulders softly.

"Wha…Wait, Sam."

"What is it? Don't you want to?" he asked him worriedly.

"It's not that I don't want to, love. It's just…We had a wonderful evening and I'm not sure I'll be able to go all the way…I don't want to mess everything up now…" he signed, looking down.

"Honey, look at me. It's fine. We don't have to go all the way if you don't want to or if you're not ready, no pressure. We had a wonderful evening and to make love to my amazing boyfriend will only make it even more marvelous. You're my lover and I want to make you feel good." he smiled warmly to him.

"I want to make you feel good too." Grizz whispered shyly.

"Then, come here." he signed with a perverted look.

He grabbed Grizz by the hips and positioned himself on top of him. The deaf boy gently trailed a kissing path down Grizz's now bare chest. Taking all the time his traumatized boyfriend would need to feel at ease, Sam slowly made his way down to his belly button. When he arrived on top of it he suddenly blew loudly in it, making Grizz explode in laughter. The deaf boy tickled him for another whole minute, leaving him laughing breathlessly on the bed.

"See? Relax, hun. I want to make you feel good, not make your heart explode from anxiety." he warmly smiled to Grizz.

"Sex isn't something that has to be so serious and grave. I understand your apprehension, but try to see the fun and bright side of it. We're together, loving each other and having a good time. I know that you never experienced this side of sexuality, but believe me when I tell you that sex can be really amusing." he giggled, still tickling him.

"Oh, and you think I'm gonna let you get away with this, huh? Come here!" Grizz jumped on him, still laughing.

 

But instead of the awaited tickles, Sam was ravished by a deep loving kiss. He slid his hands in Grizz's smooth mid-long hair and moaned under his touch as the young man slowly undressed him.

It was the first time for Grizz to be the one leading and he didn't really know how to. So he did what he always dreamed of doing and what Sam had sometimes done to him, careful not to go too far. This time though, he was the one in control so there was no real precaution to take.

After completely undressing his lover, he rested his lips on his, kissing him languidly and with envy. This envy, unlike the other times, was not tinged with shame or fear. He was confident and sure of what he wanted. He felt so good in his boyfriend's arms that he let go of everything else. He forgot about the past, the future, the town, everything. At this moment, he only lived in the immediate present, the physical present.

While kissing him, he lowered his hands along the redhead's slender body until he felt an unusual heat caress his fingers. He immediately felt Sam react under his touch, filling him with pride and making him even more eager to give him the pleasure he deserved. His hands began stroking this particular warmth but it soon wasn't enough for him. Grizz then made his way down but was stopped by Sam's hot hand.

"Grizz…You…you don't have to. If it's too much for you, it's alright. There's absolutely no obligation or pressure." he panted, eyes clouded by pure pleasure and desire.

"I want to, love. I'm fine, don't worry." he smiled sincerely to him.

As soon as he felt Grizz's warm mouth, Sam tensed in pleasure, grabbing the pillow under his head and whispering Grizz's name again and again.

Feeling that this was much too good for him to last, he pushed his lover back up and kissed him again. The kisses were wilder and even more passionate than before. Sam then asked the other young man to lie on his stomach. He slowly massaged his back, whilst whispering loving words in his lover's ear.

"I can't hold it anymore. I want to take you so much." Sam said, grabbing Grizz's hips and placing him on hands and knees on the bed.

He got behind him, leaning forward. He was about to completely take him when he sensed his boyfriend shivering.

"Grizz, are you okay?" he asked worriedly.

"I…I don't know…" he said, avoiding eye contact.

"It's alright if you want to stop here." he said, facing him and grabbing his face between his hands.

"I don't. I really want you…Just not this way." he told him weakly.

"Alright, come here, love." he said, kissing him.

He hugged him deeply before laying on his back. He encouraged his boyfriend to come on top of him.

 

Grizz slowly straddled him, hair loose and hiding his face partly, except for his closed eyes. He stopped for a few seconds, his eyes still shut tight to compose himself and push his anxiety away. He felt Sam's gentle hand pushing his hair out of his face and putting a strand behind his ear. He slowly opened his eyes and discovered a warm smiling face. Sam didn't say anything but Grizz felt the weight of his thoughts.

" _I'm here. I'm with you. I love you._ " his eyes told him.

Slowly, Grizz positioned himself on top of Sam's swelling hardness and allowed Sam to make him _his_ for the first time.

"Oh my God, Grizz." Sam pleaded, closing his eyes in pleasure.

"I love you so much, Sam." he panted.

"Me too, love." he smiled deeply.

The king sized bed began creaking and Grizz's breath shortened. They made love for a long time before Sam decided to take the lead. He grabbed his boyfriend and threw him on the bed.

Grizz now laid nude in the candle light, facing him. His body resembled a statue's, so pale and yet so warm looking. Every muscle, every curve were perfectly shaped and the whole piece of art was completely balanced and harmonized. How could he have found someone as good-looking as him? No, he wasn't good-looking; he was a real beauty. Raw, mature and indescribable beauty. The gold candle light shaped his naked form perfectly, giving him an unreal and divine look.

After taking those few seconds to admire his lover's wanting and panting body, his envy was even more hard to control. He placed himself between Grizz's long legs and took him a second time, more roughly. Grizz cried in pleasure under his touch and hugged him, as if clinging to life. His hands drew invisible patterns on his back and every caress, every move was accompanied by moaning and deep breaths.

Grizz had never felt so much pleasure. The weight he felt pressed on his naked needy body only made him hotter and he was on the verge of completely losing his mind. Sam went on, taking him wildly and passionately, repeating his lover's name again and again before completely giving in to pleasure. Grizz felt him tense in his arms and joined him in ecstasy.

 

The deaf boy pushed himself on the side, kissing innocently his boyfriend's hot shoulder. He rested an arm on Grizz's belly, giving the man the space he needed to breath.

"Are you alright, love? Does it hurt?" he inquired worriedly.

Grizz didn't say anything and turned to face him. Their face now a few centimeters apart, they never felt as connected and close as they now were. Tears began rolling down Grizz's cheeks as his beautiful green eyes shut tight.

"Oh my God, Grizz. I'm so sorry if I hurt you or if it was too much for you. I'm so sorry." Sam worried, stretching his hand to wipe his lover's tears. Grizz slowly and gently grabbed his hand before it could reach his face and kissed it before bringing it close to his heart.

"It was perfect. It was so _perfect_." he cried, opening his eyes and smiling.

"I'm so happy, Sam. It was perfect and I love you. I never thought I'd ever be able to feel something as strong and pleasurable in my whole life. It was awesome and I loved it." he continued to cry, laughing at the same time.

"We did it, love. We made love." Sam smiled deeply.

"We made love. _We made love_!" he giggled.

"Thank you for everything you did for me, Sam. Thank you for the patience you've had all those months. Never once did you pressure me or make me feel ashamed. You were always supportive and put your own needs aside for my sake. And thanks to you, I had real sex for the first time." Grizz smiled to him.

"You're welcome honey. I'm proud of you. I'm so proud you overcame your fear and anxiety, got out of his hold. I'm truly honored to have been the first one to really make love to you. I love you and I'm actually the proudest man alive to be your boyfriend." he smiled.

"I love you too." Grizz signed back.

They cuddled and laughed for the rest of the night, having the best time of their life.


	38. Hidden Truth

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The crew discovers a disturbing news.

"Sam? Could you come here for a sec, love?" Grizz asked his lover as the latter was done changing.

"What is it?" The deaf boy answered, joining him on the bed.

Grizz was seated on the bed and waited for him to settle down. He was looking at him lovingly but Sam could catch some curiosity and interest in his glance.

"I was thinking about what you told me yesterday, about you actually hearing my voice."

"Yeah, what about it?" He asked curiously.

"Well, I was wondering about the cause of this sudden change in your hearing. I think that maybe my power has something to do with it."

"Your power?"

"Yeah, when I saw you in this church, I was so happy to sing and sign to you that maybe some of my power escaped my control. You had my full attention and we really connected back there, so maybe some of my power unconsciously slipped right into you, affecting your hearing." he told him with a serious face.

Sam looked at him with wide open eyes. Of course. He had never been healed by Grizz and never thought his power could affect his disease.

"I know that actual medicine can't do anything for you but my power defies what we knew about healing. I don't want to give you false hope or anything but maybe, just maybe, I could actually heal your hearing…?"

"That…That would be incredible, Grizz. Do you really think you could heal me...?" Sam whispered.

"There's no harm in giving it a try, right? Do you wanna try it now?"

"Yes, yes please do." he said, hoping for the best.

Grizz slowly put his hands around his ears and closed his eyes, focusing. His hands began to glow and Sam suddenly felt better. In fact, his lover first absorbed every little emotional and physical pain the deaf boy felt before he could focus on his hearing. The healer frowned a bit, sensing that this wasn't any normal pain, it was much deeper. He tried to find the source of the disease and took some of it in him.

He felt consciousness leaving him and before passing out, he took his hands back. Sam felt the warmth go away and some sounds began arriving. His eyes grew wider and he smiled at his panting boyfriend.

"Are you okay, Grizz?" Sam asked worriedly.

"Can you hear my voice, Sam? Even just a glimpse?" Grizz answered, looking up at his face.

"I can. I can here your voice but it's really faint. It's as if you're really far away." he smiled.

"That's great ! It's much more complicated than I thought, I couldn't take everything. The effects might be only temporary for now, I'm sorry…"

"Sorry? Grizz, I can hear again ! It's incredible, thank you so much !"

"You're welcome, love. Even if I can't take everything away in one shot, I think that if I try again a few times, I'll be able to completely heal you." Grizz told him, putting his hands back on his ears.

"Not now, hun. You already used a great amount of energy, I know you're exhausted. It's no normal sickness, you can't just make it disappear in one day, it's fine." Sam said, grabbing his hands lovingly and kissing him.

The sounds were being more and more faint and slowly faded away, leaving him in silence again. But Sam wasn't sad or frustrated, he was excited and delighted to know that with time, he could hear again after so many years.

"We could have healing sessions every morning and see where it leads." Grizz answered smiling.

"Sounds perfect to me!" He giggled.

 

"Hi everyone !" Sam signed, entering the kitchen.

Allie, Luke, Becca and Jason were quietly talking over coffee. Eden was laughing in her crib, trying to hold her mother's fingers with both her tiny hands.

"Hi there!" Allie greeted him.

Grizz came in ten seconds later, smiling to his friends. Luke turned around to also greet them but stopped dead in his tracks, eyes wide.

"You fucking did it." a smile appeared on his warm face.

"What? What are you talking about, dude?" Grizz asked, completely lost.

"They fucking did it!" Luke turned to Jason and Becca.

"Are you sure, bro?" Jason stood up, taking a good look at Grizz and then at Sam. He laughed cheerfully before hugging Grizz.

"You did it! I'm so proud of you, man!" Jason shouted happily.

"What the actual fuck are you talking about ?!"

"They did it? Really?" Becca joined the conversation.

"Look at them, of course they did it! Hahaha!" Jason laughed again, winking at Luke.

"Can someone please explain what you're talking about?" Sam signed.

"Well, you clearly had sex!" Luke chuckled.

"Wha! I don't see why you're thinking we had…sex" Grizz's cheeks reddened in embarrassment.

"Come on, Grizz, you can't fool us! Just the way you're behaving around each other and your fucking idiotic smile say everything!" Jason said, patting him on the shoulder.

The young man turned to his boyfriend with a pleading look, searching for some help there. The only thing he found was Sam laughing so hard that he was almost crying.

"Sam!" Grizz scolded him, understanding that his reaction had clearly blown their cover.

"Sorry, love. But that's so funny!"

"It's alright, Grizz. I'm so happy for you guys !" Allie congratulated them.

"Hum…thanks?" he mumbled, dying of embarrassment. He heard Luke and Jason whispering in the back.

"Do you think he did him or the other way around?" Luke giggled.

"Sam definitely had his way. Despite his innocent gentle look, I'm sure he's a real beast in bed! You know, the dominator kind!" Jason answered, still laughing.

"Oh, poor Grizz. I hope he hadn't it too hard. Hahaha!"

"Guys!" Grizz shouted, now completely red in embarrassment.

"Did you use protection? I know you won't get pregnant but you know, with all the STD and everything…" Allie warned Grizz with a serious look.

"Oh my God, we're not having this conversation." the latter said.

Kelly entered the room, looking for her head medic to begin the day.

"Kelly, they did it!" Becca greeted her.

"Oh God, congrats guys!" Kelly answered cheerfully.

"Becca, not you too!" Grizz said, exasperated.

Sam was still laughing his ass off in the background.

"Is the whole town gonna know about this in the next hour or what?!" Grizz asked desperately.

"Grizz, can you walk for a bit this way, please?" Luke asked him laughing.

"Wha?"

"No, you're right, he's walking just fine, I'm glad Sam wasn't too rough." Jason giggled to his quarterback friend.

"Wha?! Everybody, out!"

They finished their coffee still laughing and congratulating the couple with a red and embarrassed Grizz.

 

When everybody was out to their jobs, Sam was left alone with his motherly best friend and walked to her slowly, smiling.

"Becca, I have a huge announcement."

"You mean even more huge than you having sex with Grizz? How was it by the way?!" she giggled.

"It was amazing, Bec. It was so great, I still can't understand what I did to deserve this handsome man. Before the sex thing, he had organized a whole romantic dinner at the church for me. He sang _Never enough_ from _The Greatest Showman_ and signed it all the way. He was so sweet, innocent and loving. It really was perfect. As for the sex…it was _awesome_!"

"I'm glad it went well, hun. I was sure you'd like the signing." she winked at him.

"Oh, did you help him with it?"

"Yeah, he rehearsed for months, I'm happy you liked it."

"Thanks, but that's not everything. When he sang to me, I heard him. Like really _heard_ him!"

"What?! You heard him? How?!"

"Well, he thinks that maybe with the emotion and all, some of his power slipped and allowed me to actually hear him."

"His power?"

"Yeah, this morning he tried to properly take the disease away and managed to remove some part of it, so I was able to hear for a few seconds. Isn't that amazing?!"

"It is! I'm so happy for you Sam!"

"Thanks, hun. He said that he wouldn't be able to heal my hearing right away but every morning he'll work on it and one day, I'll be able to completely hear!"

"That's awesome, Sam! God, I'm so happy for you!" she hugged him laughing.

"I'm so happy too! Can't wait!" Sam giggled with her.

 

The day went just fine and when he came home, Grizz found Sam, Allie, Luke, Will and Gordie talking in the living room. He immediately felt the tense atmosphere.

"Hey, love. How was your day?" Sam stood up to kiss his boyfriend.

"Pretty well, thanks, what are you guys doing?" he asked the whole assembly after hugging his deaf lover.

"Sam found those documents in his dad's office." Will answered seriously.

"Grizz, I'm not sure you should look at th…" Luke tried.

"What is it about?" he interrupted, not liking the sad tone in his best friend's voice.

"He has the right to know, Luke. Those files relate some kind of agreement our parents made." Allie told him.

"Agreement? What agreement?"

"Well, they apparently all agreed to conduct experiments on their new born children. It says they injected us with something to see if we could develop some kind of powers…" Gordie explained.

"What?! What kind of parent agrees to experiment on their child?!" Grizz asked infuriated.

"Apparently, they all agreed to experiment on us and to have us create some sort of new society on our own before we could reach college…"

"You mean…They put us here alone… _on purpose_?" Grizz asked weakly.

"They all signed the agreement." Luke said, looking straight into Grizz's eyes. He understood quickly that his best friend was trying to tell him something more.

"They all signed? _All_ of them?" he didn't want to believe what Luke was implying.

"All of them, Grizz." Luke repeated with a sad look.

Grizz grabbed the files and looked at the list of the parents names and signatures. He searched and searched and when he found what he was looking for, he couldn't believe it.

"Logan Visser and…Ellen…Visser" he whispered.

"I'm sorry, Grizz." Luke whispered, laying his hand on his frozen shoulder.

"That…That's not possible…My mom wouldn't…"

"Cause our parents would?!" Allie said, getting upset.

"He didn't say that, Allie." Sam defended him.

"No, she would never…" Grizz went on, completely lost in his discovery.

"She was no saint." Will took Allie's side.

"Back off, Will. You don't get to talk about his mother like that." Luke stood up.

"The file says that they chose each power themselves." Gordie added, still reading the annexed paper.

" _No, it's impossible. Mom wouldn't do that. If she did, why give me this painful and agonizing power...? No, she would never. Never._ " he thought.

"Even if my father was a real bastard, my mom would never have agreed on such a thing. She…She was kind and loving, she was like the sun…" Grizz argued faintly, his whole body progressively shaking from shock.

"Apparently, she was also the kind of mother who was ready to experiment on her child and abandon him in a fucking parallel universe!" Allie yelled.

"No…It's not true…" he shook his head, not accepting that his mother could have abandoned him to this cruel fate on purpose.

"Oh come on, Grizz, wake up! She wasn't a perfect mom. She even died and left you with an abusive dad, mother of the year!" Will said.

Grizz woke up from his previous stupor and grabbed him by the collar, pinning him against the wall.

"Don't talk about my mother like that. If you dare to insult her again, I'll kill you. I mean it." he told him coldly, tears in his green eyes.

Will had never seen Grizz this frightening and couldn't respond anything, paralyzed by fear. The tall young man let go of him and walked straight to his room before slamming the door.


	39. You don't have to pretend

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Things settle down a bit with Will...or not!

"Grizz!" Sam called after him.

"Leave him be, Sam…He just needs some time." Gordie told the deaf man.

"Why is he reacting so badly?! I mean, neither of us thought our parents could be capable of something this awful." Will said.

"You don't get it, Will. Ellen Visser wasn't just anyone. I'm sorry to say that but she was one of the smartest and nicest person I've ever met. I'm not saying that she was better than our own parents, but she really was something." Luke said calmly.

"Were they close?" Allie asked him.

"Yeah, really. They were fusional. During his whole childhood, she was the only good thing he could hang on. He always trusted her, and she did too. I've never seen such an amazing dynamic between a mother and a son. They deeply respected each other and sometimes, it felt as if they were truly connected. Grizz was really young though, but they really were on a whole other level than a simple motherly relationship. Their bond was so deep and full of love. They were inseparable and she gave Grizz her love for arts; be it dance, violin or singing. They shared so much." he said sadly.

"I can understand why he feels betrayed then…" Gordie added.

"Yeah, she always was a real model for him. I believe that her death even emphasized the love he felt for her and the abuse Logan put him through after that only reinforced it. It's no simple betrayal for him, I think all his world might be crumbling down right now…" Luke said.

"Well, apparently she didn't love him that much; choosing this shitty painful power for him…What mother wants her child to take all kind of pains for his whole life?!" Will added.

Luke didn't respond to that, he understood clearly how shitty this situation was for Grizz and really didn't need to hear Will insult Ellen any longer. He slowly got up and made his way to his best friend's bedroom. When he passed Sam, the ginger man had a perplex look on his face.

"Let me handle this one, Sam." he told him with a serious face.

"Okay, but please make sure he's safe…" he signed back.

"I will, don't worry."

 

He knocked slightly at his best friend's door.

"Grizz? It's me, buddy, open up, please."

"Go away, Luke…" he whispered.

"Come on, man. I know you don't wanna be alone right now. I'm here for you, remember? I've always been."

"Alright…" Grizz said, opening the door shyly.

The bedroom wasn't as wrecked as Luke expected it to be but a whole box of old pictures was splattered on the floor.

"What are those?" Luke asked innocently.

"Old pictures. My dad wanted me to get rid of them but I never could. It's the only pictures I have from her." his voice faded at the end of the sentence.

"What do you think about this whole agreement thing, Grizz? Do you believe it?"

"Really, I don't know. I can't figure my mother agreeing on the whole town conducting experiments on us. As I know her, she'd have fought the best she could've to stop them, not be one of the investigators." he paused for a second.

"But on the other hand, what do I really know about her? I was so young when she died, I don't really know what she was truly capable of…" a tear escaped his green eye.

"Maybe she only showed me what she wanted me to see and believe. I don't know. I really don't." he whispered, half-sobbing.

"I understand, man…I remember how she was and I can't believe she'd have agreed on something like that." Luke said, rubbing his best friend's back in a comforting way.

"Gordie said she even chose the power…" Grizz mumbled.

"I know, it's really fucked up." Luke answered.

They stayed in a sad and tense silence a few minutes, lost in their thoughts, before one of them talked again.

"Do you think she did it, Luke? Tell me honestly. Do you think all of our parents put us here on purpose, including my mom?" he asked him, eyes full of curiosity.

"Honestly, Grizz…I think they did." he saw his friend's face lose any trace of hope.

"I'm sorry but I really think they did it. I believe we didn't really know our parents in the end and I hate it but we have to accept the fact that we may be here because of them…"

"And for the powers? Do you believe your parents to be cruel enough to put you through all this shit? Remember how you blamed yourself when you couldn't control it at first. How could they do this to us?" Grizz asked him with a pleading look. It was as if he was waiting for Luke to tell him that the whole thing was an immense joke.

"I don't think we should think that way. Think about it, maybe they didn't think about the way to get there but only the main goal of each power. I believe my parents trusted me enough to give me a power that is hard to control."

"You think they actually believed in us and trusted us with those capacities…?"

"I do. Maybe we didn't really know our parents, but do we have to believe all their choices to be evil? When I think about your powers and the fact that Ellen was the one to choose it for you, it all makes sense. I think that she trusted you so much that she gave you one of the crucial powers in town. She must have believed with all her heart that you'd be strong enough to bear with all this pain and still help everyone. I don't see those powers as an other way to hurt us but more as an act of true faith."

"An act of true faith…"

Luke sensed that Grizz was trying to hang on this belief, saving some of his love for his mother. His best friend was devastated to have to hate his mother for this devilish act and was desperately trying to hold on some kind of love. Those words didn't reflect his true opinion on the matter, but he'd do anything to make his best friend feel better and if what Grizz needed was some hope, then he'll create some for him.

"Just think about this. Our parents chose us to begin a new society and try to improve humankind. Isn't that amazing?! Isn't that the ultimate proof of trust and faith? I mean, they could have injected themselves and begin this on they're own. They didn't. They chose _us_. They selected the powers they'd entrust us with."

"If it's such a beautiful proof of love, why didn't they tell us anything? Why keep us in the dark? If they chose those powers themselves, why did we hide them for our whole childhood?!"

"I…I don't know, Grizz. I'm just trying to find some logical sense in this." Luke answered sadly.

" _Of course, he's too smart for me to fool him like this..._ " Luke thought.

"Luke, I see that you're only trying to make this easier for me to accept, thank you for that, buddy. But you don't have to pretend they did that to us for the right reasons for me to feel better. If they were so good willed, they'd have told us, explained everything to us. We could have learned to accept our powers and to control them without having to hide."

Luke didn't say anything, he couldn't find something else to cheer up his best friend.

"Thank you, Luke. I know you're only trying to protect me and to make it more acceptable, but you don't have to force yourself to smile and hope for me to feel better."

Luke looked up into his best friend's eyes. They were full of understanding and compassion.

"I know you, I know how kind you are. I know that this discovery hurts you too, you don't have to hide it from me, Luke. As much as you're here for me, I'll always have your back too. You don't have to be strong for me not to break. We're both sad and shocked. I don't need you to pretend not to be for my sake."

"I'm sorry, Grizz. I didn't want you to be upset and I know how close you were to Ellen…" his eyes were glistening with tears.

Luke had immediately thought about him. He hadn't even taken the time he needed to feel sad his own parents had abandoned him and the realization now hit him.

"How about we're just there for each other? I won't pretend I'm not sad to make you feel better, I promise." Luke told him.

"It's fine, I understand why you did, thank you for that. And…I'm sorry your parents abandoned you, Luke. I really am." Grizz said, looking deep in his eyes.

"Thank you, man. I'm also sorry Ellen wasn't as kind and perfect as we all thought she was." he whispered.

"Thanks, it means a lot." he smiled.

 

They heard a soft knock on the door.

"Luke? Grizz? Can I come in…?" Sam asked worriedly.

"Yeah, come in, love." Grizz stood up.

"Are you feeling better, hun?" he said, careful not to upset his lover.

"Yeah, much better, thanks. I'm sorry I was so upset downstairs. I don't want you to believe I'm a violent man. It's just…my mother is a sensible subject for me." he whispered, ashamed.

"It's fine, love. Will went too far, you had every right to be upset."

"I guess I'll go apologize for now…don't want to create any more tension." Grizz said, kissing his boyfriend on the forehead.

Sam and Luke exchanged a look and the latter nodded to mean that everything was better now. Sam answered with a sad smile before following his lover downstairs.

When Grizz arrived in the living room, all eyes turned to him.

"Hey guys...I'm sorry I stormed out of the room like that. It was rude of me to only think about my own family without paying attention to your feelings." he then turned to Will.

"Will, I'm sorry I grabbed you like that and threatened you…I have no excuse and if I hurt you in any way, I'll gladly take the pain." he apologized.

"It's fine, Grizz, don't worry about it." Allie reassured him.

Will didn't say anything and just pouted on the couch. He obviously wasn't ready to let the matter slip.

"We were just talking about either we should tell everyone or not." Gordie added.

"We have to. It's not fair if we don't." Luke said.

"I agree, it's not up to us to filter informations concerning the whole town. We should have the going home comity have an announcement and explain what you found." Grizz told Gordie and Allie.

"And create a general depressed and panicked state? Of course, great idea, Grizz! And what should we do then, huh? Stop trying to go home because we know that your parents were the ones the put us here?! Over my dead body." Will lashed out at the healer.

"What the fuck are you talking about? My parents were not the ones to put us here, all of them did. And I never said that we have to stop trying to get home, but we have to be honest with everyone. They trust us to make this town work and they almost never questioned our decisions. We can't ask them to trust us if we hide this sort of important information." he answered back.

"Well, maybe your poor little soul was too shocked to notice but Logan and Ellen Visser were both vice-presidents of the project so, yes, they were the ones to put us here!" Will angrily stood up.

"Them being vice-presidents doesn't make them the only responsible, Will." Allie intervened.

"You don't know that, Allie! We didn't know them! As far as I know, she died long ago and he was a pedophile and abusive man, they even could have forced our parents to do it!"

"I strongly suggest you get off Grizz's ass, bastard." Luke threatened him.

"You're only making assumptions here, man. You don't know what happened and neither do we." Gordie took Luke's side.

"You think your parents were perfect? They signed, Will. I don't think anybody forced them to but they signed the fucking paper." Allie joined the argument.

"Even if the Logan did initiate the project, you have no right to attack Grizz because of what his parents did." Sam signed angrily.

Grizz didn't say anything. There was no point in arguing with someone who had already chosen the culprits. He hadn't even noticed that his parents were vice-presidents. As shocked as he was to learn that they were more involved than the others, what was the point in pointing fingers at possible wrongdoers? They were in this fucking parallel universe now and knowing exactly who put them here wouldn't help.

"Look. I'm sorry Grizz. I know you had a terrible childhood, that you loved your mother more than anything and all but without you being born in West Ham, we probably wouldn't be in this shitty situation now. So yeah, I'm mad. I'm mad I have to put up with this because of your parents. Again, I'm really sorry you had to live through abuse, grief and rapes but that doesn't make your family less guilty…" Will said with an apologetic tone, trying to ease the atmosphere.

Grizz decided to speak up, he was sick of this bullshit.

"Oh, you're _sorry_. What do you want me to say? _Thanks, dude, let's go eat burgers like buddies and forget everything_ ? Well you know what? Fuck you, Will, it's not because you know about my childhood that we suddenly are best buddies." everyone shut up, surprised by the sudden irony in Grizz's soft voice.

"You know nothing, you're as ignorant as we are. So don't make assumptions and insult my family just cause you're frustrated by what this file implies. Either way, even if my parents started all this shit, what difference does it make now? Do you feel better by hating the so called responsible? Will this help us survive better here, or maybe get us home?" Grizz asked him.

When Will didn't talk, he nodded, meaning he was waiting for a real answer.

"I guess not." Will mumbled, embarrassed.

"I don't think so either. So what about focusing on finding real solutions instead of just spitting your venom on the first bastard dumb enough to put up with your shit?"

Nobody dared to talk and just watched Will run out of the house, ashamed and embarrassed. After a little tense silence, Luke spoke up.

"Well, dude, remind me never to piss you off when you're not in a good mood." Luke giggled.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm so sorry to write less often recently... I started my summer job so I have less time to write, but I'll try to update more frequently now :))))


	40. Public Announcement

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> People discover the truth, Allie's upset.

"Thank you everyone for coming to this meeting. We have some news from the going home comity." Allie introduced the meeting. She then left her place to Gordie and Bean.

"Hey guys. So, yesterday we discovered some secret files concerning the reason we're here and who put us there." Bean began.

"Yeah, I'm sorry to tell you such bad news but the files were about some experiments conducted on us during our childhood. Apparently when we were still little babys, our parents agreed to have us be used as some kind of experiment subjects. They injected us with something that could make us develop the powers we now have." Gordie went on embarrassingly.

"Then they decided to put us here to see if we could start a new society based on those powers and maybe develop some kind of new advanced mankind…I know it sounds bad and I'm sorry but absolutely all of our parents signed this agreement." Bean finished.

The whole church was silent, people too shocked to say anything.

"I know it's a huge shock and that you feel betrayed by your own family but we have to stay strong and united even knowing that." Allie stepped in.

Her intervention didn't reassure the crowd at all and people became progressively agitated, untouched by their leader's words.

"Of course, we're not giving up on trying to get back home but we thought you all had the right to know why you're here and who did that." Gordie said.

Some people were now crying, other began chatting with each other, trying to make sense to the disturbing news. Someone spoke up.

"Is that true, Grizz? We're here because our parents decided to?" the person asked.

Grizz was caught off guard by the question. He didn't understand why anyone would ask his opinion on the matter or anything. He was no leader and people clinging to his guidance disturbed him. He slowly stood up from his seat in the front row.

"Hum…Yeah it's true. I saw the files myself and they all had signed it. So, I understand how crazy and evil this sounds but they were the ones to do that to us." Grizz said with an apologetic voice.

"What are we gonna do from now on?" another one asked him.

"Yeah, do we really have to do things according to their fucking plans and build a fucking new society?" someone else addressed Grizz.

"Hum, I'm not the leader so you should ask that to Allie, but as far as I'm concerned, I don't think we should react to this news with even more hatred. It's not about what they initially wanted us to do or not but more like what we have to do to survive. I don't think we could survive this situation without sticking together and forming some kind of society. We shouldn't think about them or consider their goals anymore, we have to live for ourselves. And if this means organizing a new town like we're doing, that's fine by me." he answered the crowd.

Everybody was silently listening to him, hanging on his every word.

"As Allie said, we have to stay strong and stay united." he finished.

The whole town felt reassured after his little speech and started to feel more at ease.

"Yeah, thank you Grizz but I'm gonna take it from here." Allie told him coldly.

"We're gonna keep searching for ways to get home but in the meantime, everything stays the same. We still have adjustments and changes to make but this town is now functioning pretty well, let's keep it that way." Allie added, but nobody was paying attention to her anymore.

"We're slowly running short on vegetables and food though so we'll have a farming group explore the forest next month to maybe find a bigger land to grow vegetables and everything on. If you wanna volunteer for that, please go find Luke. That's everything for today, thank you for your attention." she finished before heading towards the exit.

She didn't even wait for possible questions or anything and everyone could feel she was upset.

 

The following evening, they were all in Allie's house's living room when Sam decided to talk to her about her apparent bad mood.

"Hum, Allie? Is something wrong? You seemed pretty tense the whole day." he gently signed.

"I'm perfectly fine, thanks Sam. Just mind your own business." she snapped at him before going to her room and slamming the door shut.

He exchanged a look with Grizz and the latter decided to try to ease his friend's trouble by bringing her a warm cup of tea. He knocked gently at her door before entering.

"Hey girl." he greeted her softly.

Seated at her desk, she turned a bit to face him with a cold gaze.

"It's chamomile, I hope it's fine." he told her shyly.

He didn't like to intrude her personal space but he really wanted to help her ease her troubled mind.

"Hum, is there anything I can do for you, Allie? You seem troubled but I have no idea what's going on." he tried.

"As if you don't know why I'm upset." she answered sharply.

"Sorry, but I really have no idea…People accepted the bad news pretty well and are fine with going on with their duty and everything, so truly, I don't see what's wrong…" he almost apologized.

"You, Grizz! You're what's fucking wrong!" she finally spilled.

"What?! What did I do wrong?" he asked her shocked.

"Well, I never knew you intended on becoming the leader of this fucking town! How come people turn to you when they're troubled and have question about the town's organization?!"

"You know I never wanted to make you uncomfortable, Allie. I don't know why they turned to me and not you, but I never asked them to. I'm not planning on leading any town, you're making an amazing job." he tried to calm her.

"That doesn't change the fact that people would rather prefer being leaded by you than me! You're always making big speeches and making me look like an idiot, taking all the responsibilities on yourself! You're maybe not the one who asked them to feel this way but you surely behave like the fucking leader!"

"I'm…I'm sorry, Allie. I never wanted to take your place as a leader or make you feel like an idiot…"

"But you did anyway! So please, just leave _my_ fucking town alone and let me handle the leading part! You don't have to answer to everyone and give your fucking opinion every damn time, just let me handle things from now on." she coldly warned him.

"O…Okay…But just so that you know, a true leader wouldn't behave like you are right now. You should maybe ask yourself why people are reacting this way instead of just lashing out at me."

"Get out. You're staying in my house, so just fucking do what I tell you to."

"You told me the same thing before Dewey's execution, I don't remember it ending so well." he answered sharply.

Allie didn't say anything for a moment before Grizz spoke again.

"I'm worried about you, Allie. I understand that power can sometime go in one's head but you're worth much more than that. You know why people are turning to me in time of crisis? Cause I'm close to them. I don't see myself as superior or better because I have responsibilities or things like that. But by behaving like some kind of president, you're distancing yourself from them, Allie. Of course they're gonna turn to someone else if you think that this is _your_ town. Please don't look down on people because of your position, cause I know how truly kind hearted and generous you really are. Despotism doesn't suit you." he finished before getting out of her room.

 

The next day, Campbell approached Allie after lunch.

"Hey cousin! How are you doin?" he smiled to her.

"Hey Campbell. What do you want?"

"Oh, why be so rude? I'm just trying to be nice to my cousin. I saw you were pretty upset yesterday."

"Yeah, but that's none of your business."

"Well, maybe it is. You see, I could understand that you were upset because of Grizz taking your place as the leader."

She turned to him suspiciously and with curiosity.

"And how is that any of your business?" she asked him.

"Well, as you can imagine, Grizz and I aren't what you could call best buddies, so it wouldn't really help me if he took the lead of this town."

"I get that, but there's nothing I can do if people don't want me to lead them anymore."

"You could always get rid of the opponent. With him out of the picture, the town's yours again." he winked at her.

"Get rid of the opponent? I'm not some fucking murderer, Campbell, I'm not gonna get rid of anyone."

"Who said you had to hurt him? Just get him to leave town for a while, leaving you enough time to get people to trust you again."

"Make him leave town? How?"

"Well, weren't you looking for volunteers for the next expedition?" he smiled devilishly to her.

"That's impossible. Because of his heart, Kelly will never let him go to the expedition. Plus I must have a reason to ask him to go to the woods, I can't just tell him to go cause I want to, that would be too suspect."

"Didn't he fight some kind of bear last time he went into the woods? Use this. Tell the comity that given the fact that he already encountered wild animals without getting hurt, it would be safer for him to go with them."

"Mmh, that's not such a bad idea."

"It's a great idea. Come on, Allie. You know that you're gonna lose this town to Grizz if you don't do something. Plus, you're not hurting him or anything, you're just keeping him away for a while, no harm there."

"You're right, I'll see what I can do, thanks Campbell."

"You're very welcome dear."

 

The next day, she asked Grizz if it would be okay for him to go to the woods with the farming group. Sam, Kelly, Becca and Luke were also present and rose up against the idea.

"There's absolutely no fucking way Grizz is going back to the woods after what happened last time." Luke said.

"Plus we can't risk it with his heart." Sam added.

"Yeah, I wouldn't recommend it either." Kelly joined the conversation.

"Hum, guys? I'm right here, I can speak for myself." he laughed gently.

"Why do you want me to go with them Allie? You know I shouldn't go to the woods, so you must have a reason to ask that." Grizz went on.

"Yeah, thing is, last time you encountered a grizzly, right? And you were able to keep him from killing you at the time thanks to your powers. I believe that if the farming group comes across a wild animal, having you with them might keep them safe and sound. Plus you bounded with the animal, it could even recognize you if you meet again. You being there will make them much more safe."

"Mmh, that's not such a bad idea." Grizz thought about it.

"It's the worst idea. You didn't get out of this in one peace last time, Grizz, remember?" Sam signed.

"I know. But that's with me actually healing the wild animal, just imagine what could happen to them if they're unable to ease the beast like I did last time. People could actually die. Even if I get hurt a bit, at least if I'm here, there's higher chance everybody will come back safely."

"I agree with him. I remember Emily dying in my arms and I don't want to ever have to announce the town we let someone die again." Luke said with a sad tone.

"By the way, why didn't you heal her back at the time, Grizz?" Becca asked.

"I tried to. But there wasn't much I could do, her body was shutting down and I tried to help her but the pain was too much for me to take it all." he whispered the end.

"Well, as Luke said, we just want everybody to come home safely." Allie added.

"Alright, I'll take extra medication and go to the woods, count me in." Grizz concluded.

"Great." she smiled to her friend.

" _Thats perfect, and while he's gone, I'm gonna take my town back_." she thought to herself.


	41. Departure

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The expedition begins, the town changes a lot.

"I hate seeing you go…" Sam signed slowly.

They were now alone in their bedroom for the night and Sam clearly didn't like the idea of Grizz leaving for the woods.

"I know, love. But I gotta do this. You know it's best if I'm with them. Here, Kelly has medical supplies and everything but if someone gets injured in the woods, there'll be absolutely nothing to help them. At least if I'm with them, I'll be able to keep them safer." he signed as best as he could with a tender smile.

"I know, I know. But still…Promise me to be extra careful out there. I need you to come back home safely." he sobbed a bit.

"I promise I'll be super careful, love. There's so much waiting for me here, I can't risk it." he smiled widely to his lover.

"Do you know how long you'll be gone?" Sam asked worriedly.

"I don't really know. Probably just a week, two at the most."

"I'm gonna miss you so much…"

"You too, love. But it's alright, we only leave in two weeks, so we're fine for now." he kissed him.

 

Sam felt as if those were the fastest two weeks ever. They tried to spend as much time as possible together but even though, he felt this wouldn't be near enough for him to hold onto for the next week. Allie had advanced the day of departure and seemed extremely impatient for their companions to go on their adventure. She also began spending more and more time with Campbell, slowly raising suspicion.

The awaited day of departure came and Sam was completely heartbroken. He didn't know if he'd ever see his lover again or if he'd make it out of the woods safely and that freaked the shit out of him. The previous night, Sam had made love to him passionately, as if it was the last time they'd taste each other's body.

"Hey, love." Grizz pulled him out of his sad thoughts.

"It's gonna be alright, Sam. I'm gonna come back safely and we'll just continue loving each other for the next hundred years, okay?" he said gently to him, lifting his chin up.

"Okay…Have a safe trip, then." he smiled as best as he could with tears in his blue eyes.

"I love you, Sam."

"I love you too, hun."

They kissed deeply and the adventurer left him with a wide reassuring smile. As soon as Grizz's hand had left his, Sam felt empty. As if an immense void was now digging in his heart. He didn't understand why but he sensed something bad would happen.

" _I'm just being paranoid…_ " he thought to himself.

Allie watched the whole scene from afar, feeling ashamed to be the one to separate the cute couple for her own political goals.

" _It's fine, he'll just come back safely._ " she thought, feeling a little bad for doing this to her friend.

 

During the day, Campbell asked everyone to gather at the church in the evening. Sam didn't like that…Campbell had never been a timid child but only brought attention on him when he was planning something bad and this meeting didn't reassure him at all.

"Campbell? Why the fuck are we all here?" Allie asked him with a puzzled look.

"Just step back, Allie, that's not your call." he answered coldly.

"Good evening everyone! Thank you for coming even though _I_ was the one to ask you to come." Campbell spoke up.

The crowd was silent and listened to him carefully.

"So, I know that not everybody here is alright with the actual leading of this town and I decided to do something about it. I want to offer a real leader election, so that you can chose who you want to lead you, what do you think?" he finished with a vicious smile.

"What?!" Allie said, shocked by her cousin's betrayal.

The crowd became agitated and obviously agreed with the idea.

"Anyone can run for Mair, we'll give you three days to register, there'll be a debate and then we'll vote to chose the new leader."

Everybody cheered at the idea and the meeting ended. Allie ran to Campbell at the exit of the church.

"Bastard, how could you do this to me? I thought you were on my side!" she snapped at him.

"Allie, I suggest you talk to me with more respect if you don't want me to tell everyone you sent Grizz away only to be sure he wouldn't take your place." he responded coldly before speaking forward.

"I'm sorry, cousin, but you're not needed as a leader anymore. Thanks for your hard work, but it's high time you let me handle things from now on." he went on.

"You…You used me to get rid of Grizz…You knew he'd be elected so you had first to make sure he wouldn't be nearby before betraying me." Allie whispered.

"I have no idea what you're talking about." he answered with a wide evil grin.

"And I suppose that the registration being exactly coordinated with the comeback of the expedition group has nothing to do with you either." she accused him.

"Oh, Allie…You're a real optimistic, thinking they'll be back." he patted her hair before leaving.

"Wha…What did you do, Campbell?! What did you do to them?! If you did anything to Grizz…!" she yelled at him.

"The real question, Allie, is what did _you_ do to him." he shouted from afar, not even bothering to turn around to face her.

Soon after the beginning of the elections, Lexie also ran for Mair and at Campbell's surprise, a whole lot of people supported her cause. He decided to let her pick his side and planned his coup.

 

When he tried to recruit the Guard to help him, he was surprised to see how attached to Grizz they were.

"No fucking way, this is wrong. Grizz would never agree with that." Jason had told him.

"Well, Grizz is not here anymore, Jay." Harry told him.

"Maybe not right now, but he's gonna come back and we'd rather have him lead the town than you trying to take it by force." Clark added.

"I don't think you have much of a choice here, guys." Campbell added.

"What do you mean?" Jason inquired.

"Well, first, there's a high possibility that Grizz will never come back from his little walk in the woods. If he doesn't come back from the expedition, who do you wanna see lead you? Me, or the girl who forced you, Jason, to shoot someone as a revenge for her sister's murder? Allie has become a despot and honestly, even if I'm sometimes a bit rebel, I'd never force you to go as far as to kill someone."

Jason and Clark were now silent. It was true that there was the possibility that Grizz would never come back, but neither of them wanted to acknowledge it. Campbell let them think for a bit before speaking again.

"And secondly, we know you hid the guns and that you're the only ones using them. It'd be really bad for the Guard if such a secret was revealed, don't you think?" he smiled.

"Wha…motherfucker!" Clark snapped at him.

"Look. I see that you're good guys and that you only want everyone to be safe, it's fine. The election ends when the expedition group comes back, if they do. If you want, we'll run another election between Grizz and I when he's back and if he wants to run for Mair, would that be okay with you two?" he offered.

"Mmh…okay, as long as Grizz can run for Mair when he comes back, it's fine by me." Jason answered.

"Me too." Clark concluded.

"Perfect." Harry smiled.

 

Campbell knew that Luke would be much harder to convince.

"Absolutely not. I'll never agree to that, you may as well go fuck yourself, Campbell." Luke had told him.

"Why be so rude, man?" Campbell said.

"First, don't " _man_ " me, we're not friends. And secondly, don't you think I clearly understand what you're trying to do, asshole? You're trying to recruit the Guard to come work for you and take the town by force cause you know that nobody's gonna vote for you at the election. Allie is doing a great job leading this town. Of course, she makes mistake, as we all do, but she's doing her best and I believe that it's already brave enough."

"I have to disagree, power's gotten in her head." Campbell said seriously.

"Why do you say that?" Luke asked suspiciously.

"Well, did you know that she only asked Grizz to join the expedition to get rid of him so that she could bring people to trust her again without him messing with her leadership." he tried to sound shocked.

"What?! But she knows the risks Grizz is taking by being a part of this expedition. She would never do that."

"Well, she actually came to me, asking if I had any idea about how to get rid of him for a while without it being suspicious. Still trust her leading this town?"

"I…I can't believe it." Luke mumbled.

"Look, I know I'm not your best candidate, but Allie's really gotten too far and needs to keep her feet on the ground for a while. I promise you, if Grizz comes back, I'll organize another election to give him his chance."

"Grizz isn't interested in leading this town." Luke snapped coldly at him.

"Maybe not, but the whole town wants him to be." Harry joined the conversation.

"Please Campbell, stop pretending you're trying to help Grizz or make him a leader. You hate him. And also, please don't think that I forgot about how bad you hurt him." Luke stood up.

"Luke, where are you going, dude?" Jason tried to stop him.

"I'm out of here. There's no way I'm gonna take part in your little coup." Luke addressed Campbell.

"I'm sorry but I don't think you have much of a choice, Luke." Harry told him, getting in front of him.

"Get the fuck out of my way, pussy."

"You wouldn't want cutie Helena being hurt because of you chickening out of the project, right Luke?" Campbell giggled.

"What?! If you hurt Helena, I swear to God Campbe…"

"Just remember we're the ones with the guns now, Luke. And there's no fucking way I'm letting you escape with everything that you know. So if you don't want your precious girlfriend getting hurt, you'll just go with it." Campbell smiled.

"Fuck you." he said, seating back In his chair, completely defeated by Campbell's threat.

 

During this time, in the woods.

"Nobody moves." Grizz whispered, halting the whole group.

"What is it, man?" someone asked worriedly.

"I heard something…" he mumbled.

The sounds became louder and louder and suddenly Grizz was pinned down to the ground, a huge wild mass of brown fur surrounding his whole body. When he felt a bear's rough tongue on his cheek, he understood right away.

"Hey buddy!" he laughed in the familiar grizzly's embrace.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Grizz 2.0 's comeback !


	42. The Capsules

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Grizz and the exploration group continue their journey.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Grizz 2.0 refers to the grizzly Grizz encountered in chapter 21. The Woods.
> 
> The name popped up in the comments, so thank you Kyotsu for coming up with that ;)))  
> Hope you enjoy his coming back btw :)))

"Hum…Grizz? What the actual fuck?!" one of the exploration and farming crew asked him.

"Hahaha, don't worry, guys. I now this fluffy cutie." he laughed, still hugging the grizzly.

Grizz 2.0 licked Grizz's smiling face for a few seconds more before letting the young man stand up again.

"So, guys, let me introduce you my wood's friend; Grizz 2.0 the grizzly." he addressed the group, still scraping his animal friend's belly.

"You have a lot of explaining to do, dude." someone said.

"So, one day, I was very upset and went to the woods on my own - which you never should do yourselves by the way - and came across this big fluffy grizzly. He was injured and charged at me, I played dead but he still scratched me a bit and broke a few of my ribs, hence the hospital Thanksgiving for me. I saw that his paw was bleeding so when he calmed down, I composed myself and approached him to try and heal him. At first, he was really scared and suspicious but he still let me in his personal space and I was able to heal his injured paw." he explained.

"You actually healed a grizzly?!" a girl said, not believing her ears.

"You didn't hear about that? The whole town already knows about this story, it's amazing!" another farmer told her.

"Yeah, well, either way, he apparently remembered me and here we are. Trust me, we're completely safe from any other wild animal now that we have this big guy with us." he giggled, still cuddling with the grizzly.

Grizz 2.0 suddenly started to sniff the group's bags, looking for something.

"What is he doing?" a girl asked, worriedly looking at Grizz.

"I have absolutely no idea…It's as if he's looking for something. No, more like smelling something." he said, approaching the animal.

"Hey buddy, what are you smelling in there? Good food?" he smiled to his fluffy friend.

Suddenly the grizzly stood up on his back legs and roared violently. He pushed and scratched Grizz harshly on the ground before going completely crazy and violent.

"Grizz! What the fuck is happening?!" a bunch of scared explorers shouted, completely panicked.

"I don't know!" Grizz told them.

Grizz 2.0 went on with his madness and almost charged at the crew when he sensed something on his back. Grizz had stood up and laid now his glowing hands softly on the wild animal's back.

"Grizz! What the fuck are you doin?! Get away from the beast!" a young man shouted at him.

But Grizz was completely focused on the fluffy animal. He was searching for the connection they had had many months ago in the same woods. His eyes were deeply focused on the growling grizzly's back and his hands glowed even more, slowly enveloping almost the whole animal.

"I got you, buddy. It's fine, it's just me." he whispered at the now calming bear.

Grizz 2.0 rested again on all fours, panting heavily and settling down. He turned around to face the healer and Grizz took his head gently between his still glowing hands. Their gaze crossed and their eyes softly focused on each other. They were then completely connected to each other emotionally and Grizz slowly frowned.

"Something's wrong." he said seriously, not letting the animal's stare slip away from his eyes.

"Yeah, something's definitely wrong, dude! A fucking bear almost killed us! What the fuck do you think you're playing with, Grizz?!" a guy almost yelled.

"Quiet. It's not his fault, he doesn't feel any pain, he's not even upset. It's as if something suddenly drove him mad." he told himself, thinking deeply.

"Grizz, I'm sorry, but this animal is clearly out of control. We have to go and stay away from it." Gwen stepped in.

"Out of control? Does he seems out of control to you right now?!" he looked angrily at her, the bear following quietly his every move.

"Maybe not anymore, but it could go mad on us at anytime, it's too dangerous to take him with us any further." she answered vigorously.

"Gwen. This grizzly didn't go mad like that just because he felt like it. Something definitely caused him to lose his mind, and we're not leaving this exact place as long as we don't figure out what triggered that kind of reaction."

"But…"

"No, Gwen! This time I was able to quiet him down, but I used a lot of energy to do so and I don't think all the other wild animals on the loose here are gonna go down this easily. We have to figure out what's driving him mad before taking another step in those dangerous woods. I can't protect this whole group by myself all the time if we don't figure out what the hell happened!" he told her seriously.

Grizz looked really upset and tired. This "quieting a bear down" probably took a bigger hold on him than they all had realized at first. Seeing the state of their main protector and only healer, the whole group agreed to rest for a bit, giving him the time he needed to figure out what had happened a few minutes ago.

 

"Alright, can you please all recall what happened exactly before the bear went mad?" Grizz asked the crew, calming down and panting a bit.

"Hum…He was sniffing our bags." someone answered casually.

"The bags, yes. Can all of you please put your bags together so that we can inspect them?" he told the group, who immediately executed the bags gathering, hearing the exhaustion in their healer's voice.

"So…Maybe someone brought raw meat in the woods?" Gwen tried to assist Grizz.

"Raw meat doesn't drive animals mad. He didn't even try to tear the bag apart. He just sniffed something and attacked us." he said, trying to smell the bottom of one of the bags.

"Urgh! What's this smell?!" he said, getting the bag away from his nose.

"Grizz, all the bags smell like that…It's as if the were all soaked in a weird substance." someone reported to him.

"How come we didn't see that before?!" he said angrily to himself.

A girl opened a bag to see that some kind of capsule had been put in the bottom and had probably opened at the first shock the bag received.

"Capsules were placed in our bags to open easily at any shock." Gwen commented.

"What the fuck…Who would do that? And what are those caps for?" a guy added.

Grizz then grabbed one of the opened capsules and tried to direct it slowly towards Grizz 2.0 to see his reaction. The bear sniffed his fingers a bit before smelling the cap. His eyes turned red before he charged violently at Grizz. The latter, being prepared for the attack, dodged the animal and immediately put his glowing hands on his head. Just as before, the light coming from his hands enveloped the whole animal in a few seconds and the grizzly calmed down. Grizz 2.0 started cuddling again with the young man before Grizz fell on the ground.

"Grizz!" Gwen screamed.

She pushed softly the bear aside to have access to her friend and knelt down next to him.

"Grizz, are you alright? Can you hear me?" she panicked.

"I'm fine, Gwen. Sorry if I scared you, I just felt so exhausted suddenly." he said, his eyes closing by themselves.

"It's okay, you can sleep for a bit. Just rest and we'll continue our trip when you wake up." she reassured him.

"Thanks. Oh and the capsules…can you…get rid of…them…?" he said before falling deeply asleep in Gwen's arms.

"Of course, Grizz." she whispered, putting a bag under his head to make him feel more comfortable.

But before she could even finish installing him, Grizz 2.0 lied on the ground next to Grizz, placing his friend's head on his fluffy belly. Both Grizz slept for a bit, cuddling in the warm animal fluff.

 

During this time, the whole crew helped removing the capsules and rinsing the bottom of the bags. Grizz slept for a few hours before waking up to a cheerful and united exploring and farming group.

"Hey Grizz, how are you feeling?" a girl asked him gently with a genuine smile.

"Hum…Much better, thanks. What happened? We have to take care of the caps and…" he mumbled, still waking up.

"Don't worry about those anymore, man. We took care of that, that's the least we could do after you took all those risks to find the cause of the problem." a young man addressed him.

"Yeah, and I'm sorry I was rude to you, Grizz. You were right, if we had just continued our journey without taking care of this huge problem, we would have driven all the wild animals in this forest mad. And as you said, we can't always rely on you to get us out of shitty situations; you have limits too." Gwen apologized.

"She's right, we're sorry we only thought of ourselves without considering that you weren't just some kind of inexhaustible source of power but actually a real person, with feelings, pain and everything. We put too much pressure on you to keep us safe, sorry…" an other girl added.

"It's fine, guys. I don't care taking the pain as long as it's for wonderful people like you. Thank you for letting me rest and for taking care of the capsules." he answered smiling.

Before going back to their exploration, Grizz said goodbye to his wood's friend.

"Hey buddy. Thank you for pointing out the danger laying in our bags. I promise I'll come back to see you soon." he smiled sadly to the bear, scratching his belly.

Grizz 2.0 licked his face one last time before letting his human friend go. He stayed there, watching the group leave, like a quiet watchdog.

The whole crew went on with their journey and finally found land. A few turkeys were joyfully playing when they started chasing after them, so happy to have found exactly what they were searching for. They set up camp at this exact place for the night, preparing for their comeback the following morning. Keeping warm around the fire, they started thinking about the caps again.

"Hey guys, I was wondering…Do you have any idea who could have put those caps in our bags?" a guy asked.

"I don't know…But the person who did that clearly wanted us injured or worse. Those caps, here in the woods, are just like a death sentence." Grizz answered with a serious face.

"Could it be…Allie?" someone said carefully.

"What?! Why would Allie do that?" Gwen responded.

"Well, we all know that some part of the town wishes for Grizz to take the lead. And Allie wasn't really keen on this sudden change of popularity. Isn't that suspicious that she hang out with Campbell, then asked Grizz to suddenly join the expedition despite Kelly's recommandations and now we find out that someone wanted this farming group never to return? I mean, I like Allie, I really do, but her behavior towards Grizz was really weird for the past weeks…" someone added.

"Allie would never do that." Grizz said with a serious tone.

"But…" they went on.

"No. I know her, she's my friend. And even if she was as evil as you say she is, then she would just have attacked me. Even if Campbell was also with her on this, they would never risk the life of innocent people like you only to get back at me. I know Campbell can be a real asshole, but he's no murderer. And Allie even less." he said calmly, completely convinced by his own words.

"I don't know…But if it's not Allie or Campbell, then who would want us dead?"

"I clearly have no idea…Maybe if we try to find who could have access to this kind of capsules, then we'll figure out who placed them here." Gwen said.

"I never saw caps like that before…" Grizz told her.

"Mmh I've heard of something like that in hunter's circles. They use it against animals to drive them crazy and have "more fun" killing them when they're out of control…"

"The only family known for their hunting skills in West Ham was…" Gwen thought out loud.

"The Eliots." Grizz whispered.

 

During this time, in New Ham.

"I'm sorry, but the election is cancelled." Harry announced before the debate.

"What?! Why?" everyone began getting agitated.

"Allie Pressman tried to cheat and changed the votes. That is why, Lexie, the Guard and I will take upon the responsibility of leading this town starting now and until further notice. The Guard will deal with the cheaters; Allie and Will."

"What? Allie cheated?!" someone shouted.

"Shame to the cheaters!" someone else yelled.

The whole town exclaimed insults and disgusting names to the handcuffed Allie and Will. Luke had arrested them, against his own will, and now had to lock them in a private secret cell.

Sam watched the whole scene from afar and whispered.

"Grizz…please come back quickly…"

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know that such capsules don't really exist in reality, but thanks to this magical thing called "fanfic writing", they exist in our New Ham :)))


	43. Wild life

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The explorers aren't back home yet...

"What should we do once we get home?" Gwen asked the group.

The exploration crew was on its way back home and was cheerfully walking after their huge farming discovery the night before. They were all joyfully chatting when Gwen brought the sensitive subject of who could have tried to kill them.

"I think we should lay low." Grizz answered seriously.

"What? Lay low? We can't let this pass, Grizz." someone else said.

"I don't mean to hide what happened, but if we just enter town screaming that Campbell tried to kill us, the bastard will see us coming and will have enough time to hide evidences and come up with a cover story." he explained.

"So, how do we expose him?" Gwen asked.

"Well, we have to get proof so that when we go against him, we're absolutely sure to get justice. I'd say we try to investigate." the healer responded.

"And what about Allie?" she went on.

"What about Allie?" he stopped walking and turned to her.

"Well, apparently I'm not the only one thinking she's got something to hide. It's weird that she insisted on you coming with us to the woods at the same time as she began hanging out with her cousin." Gwen explained.

"Allie has nothing to do with this. As I said, I know her and she'd never try to hurt us like that. She knows how dangerous those woods can be, she was there last time when I went back injured. She's my friend, she'd never do that." he said, trying to convince himself at the same time.

"Well, we'll investigate and see if she really had something to do with all this shit." a guy spoke.

Suddenly, the whole crew stopped dead when they heard a loud wolf howl.

"What the fuck?!" someone said, panicking.

"Nobody moves or speaks." Grizz instructed, scanning the woods and seeing two round yellow eyes looking straight at the group.

Suddenly the eyes turned red and the wolf charged at them, running wildly and growling.

"Everybody, run !" Grizz screamed.

In their mad race, the young man tried to analyze the situation, searching for the cause of this madness. He yelled to the others while running.

"Did you check all the bags?!" he shouted at Gwen.

"Yeah, we did, except for the one that was under you when you were sleeping! We thought it was alright since Grizz 2.0 didn't react!" she answered screaming and running.

"The capsule probably wasn't broken yet. Which bag was it?" Grizz asked seriously.

"Mine." Gwen responded, her face turning white in realization.

"What?! You mean a capsule probably just broke in your bag?!" a guy shouted.

"Gwen! Did you know about that?! Did you do it on purpose?!" someone else joined the conversation, still running.

"No, I didn't! I don't know why it only broke now, I didn't mean to!" she defended herself, but her fellow explorers didn't believe a word she was screaming and began turning against her.

"You traitor! You were on Campbell's side all this time!" someone yelled while racing.

"We should never have trusted you!" some other girl shouted.

"It's not her fault!" Grizz began to take her side when he noticed something alarming.

A few explorers were too tired to keep running and tried to hide behind trees.

"No, don't stop! It smells us, there's no use in hiding!" the healer yelled.

He slowed down and went to them to try and help them on their feet, but it was too late and the wolf had now caught up with them and growled menacingly at them. Some of the group froze when the others tried to grab some kind of weapons like gourds or wooden sticks.

Grizz grabbed a big stick and held it up against the wolf. The animal tried to charge at one of the crew and everybody attacked it at the same time, trying to injure it with their sticks. They partly succeeded but the wolf stood up a few seconds later, bleeding and even more furious. Apparently those capsules didn't only make them crazy but also completely painless.

"Oh God…" Grizz whispered.

"Grizz! Do something!" someone yelled at him, watching the wolf walk slowly and threateningly towards the group.

"Like what?!" he answered.

"I don't know, can't you do your weirdo thing like you did with the bear?!" Gwen screamed at him.

"I knew that particular bear and had already connected with him! If I made even just one step towards this crazy wolf, I'd be dead in two seconds." he explained desperately.

The wolf then picked someone in the group to be its next target and walked straight to Gwen, growling. The crew, watching the wolf spot only Gwen began retreating and getting away from the girl.

"Hum…guys? Help me, please…" she whispered, completely frightened.

"I'm sorry Gwen, but we won't all be able to get out of this alive…" someone said, looking sadly at her.

"What?! What the fuck are you talking about?!" she panicked, understanding that no one was brave enough to step between her and this wolf.

"You're the reason we're all in this fucking situation, Gwen. There's no way I'm gonna risk my life saving yours." some other girl whispered hatefully at her.

"Guys, we have to stay united. We won't get out of this situation by sacrificing someone and running for our life." Grizz said calmly, not letting the animal get out of his sight.

"She betrayed us and kept a capsule in her bag. There's no way I'm helping her." someone answered.

"Come on, guys, I didn't do it on purpose. I'm sorry, okay? I'm really sorry for putting us in this situation, just…please help me." she sobbed.

Nobody answered and suddenly the wolf charged at her, showing his terrifying canines and sharp claws.

"No!" Gwen screamed, but never felt the claws cutting through her body.

When she opened her eyes again, she saw Grizz shielding her and taking the claws scratching and violent bites in her place. He had grabbed her between his arms as they had fallen on the ground and now let the wolf tear his back apart only to keep her safe. He whispered soothing words to her ear, trying to calm her down.

"It's okay, Gwen. Don't worry, everything's gonna be fine. We're gonna get out of these woods and you'll get to see your friends again and…" he went on and on, slowly mumbling non-sense only to try and get his mind out of his hurting back.

Suddenly, the wolf completely ripped his back appart in one deep and violent move and Grizz cried out in agony. A loud painful awful scream escaped his mouth as he was still under the wild wolf's attack. At first, the healer had imagined shielding Gwen for a bit before turning around to grab the wolf's head and try to get the capsule's effect to leave its body. But now Grizz couldn't think anymore, the only thing occupying his head was this agonizing pain.

Everybody froze when they heard their healer shout so painfully. Grizz didn't stop screaming. He tried to keep the pain in, but it was too much and he couldn't prevent the yells from leaving his mouth. The crew tried to shove the wolf away from his ripped open bloody back but the wild animal didn't even acknowledge the injuries and continued to torn Grizz apart.

Unexpectedly, the wolf suddenly stopped and turned his head to the right before the crew heard a strong growl coming from deeper in the woods. The wolf stopped hurting Grizz and began backing off, turning his whole body in attack mode towards a new enemy.

 

"Grizz 2.0…" some panicked explorer whispered, amazed by the bear's huge shadow appearing in the distance.

Suddenly they saw the bear running toward them and charging violently at the wild crazy wolf.

"Everybody, out of the way!" some guy yelled.

"Someone grab Grizz and get him out of here!" a girl shouted.

They ran to the injured young man and tried to get him up without touching his bleeding back but he still screamed in pain when they grabbed him. They managed to pull him out of the battle area and slowly put him on the ground, trying to stop the bleeding on his back.

Meanwhile, Grizz 2.0 and the wolf were violently lashing at each other but the capsule's effect wore down as all the substance in the air had been consumed and the animal calmed down a bit. Coming to its senses, the injured wolf backed down in front of the giant frightening grizzly and limped away in fear. Grizz 2.0. calmed down and sniffed his way up to Grizz's agitated form on the grass.

"We have to get him home, then Kelly will take care of him." Gwen said seriously.

Nobody dared to look at her in the eyes after their previous coward behavior.

"Look, guys, we'll talk about you letting me down another time, okay? Right now, Grizz is clearly bleeding out and will probably die if we don't get medical help very soon. So just wake your asses up and help me carry him home." she snapped at them.

"We have to be careful not to touch his back." some guy stepped in.

They tried to move him and to get him to stand up a bit but the young man screamed in pain as soon as they grabbed him.

"He's too tall, we can't get him to walk and we can't carry him together either because of his back's injuries…" a woman said.

"Maybe we should leave him here and go get Kelly." someone else answered.

"No way, Grizz will bleed to death before she's even halfway there." Gwen responded, thinking hard.

The young man was whimpering, agonizing, when his fluffy friend picked him up from the ground without further notice and placed him on his own back.

"What the f…" an explorer complained before Gwen interrupted him.

"Let him do! This bear has by far been the best at taking care of him since we entered these damn woods." she snapped at him.

The grizzly walked fast to the border of the forest with Grizz on his back and the group followed him as best as they could. As they approached town, Gwen called Kelly to come get Grizz in emergency. The bear slowly laid his human friend to the ground and began licking his face in a comforting way.

"You really don't wanna leave him here hurting, huh?" Gwen smiled sadly at the fluffy beast. The bear looked up at her for a second, as if understanding her words and went back to the inspection of Grizz's injuries.

"I promise you we won't let him die. He protected me and put his own life at risk so that I would be safe, I'll never let him down." she told him, scraping his fluffy back a little.

From the outside, she probably looked like a crazy woman talking to a bear as if nothing was strange.

"By the way, buddy, thank you for earlier. You probably heard Grizz scream and came to save us, thank you." she smiled.

Kelly and the medical team arrived in car and managed to move Grizz when the latter finally let go of his bear friend's paw. Before accompanying her friend to the hospital, Gwen turned one last time towards Grizz 2.0. and felt her heart shatter when she saw him retreating to the forest alone.

 

Meanwhile at New Ham's church, everybody was getting lunch when someone barged in and announced some big news.

"The exploration team came back! And they found land!" the young man said cheerfully.

The whole crowd expressed their joy and enthusiasm, except for a few people.

"They came back?! How come…?" Campbell whispered, looking panicked.

"They came back?! Gosh, I gotta go see if Grizz is okay." Sam told Becca with a worried look.

"Go see him, I'll stay here with Eden." she answered.

 

When Sam ran to Gwen, she was crying in front of the hospital.


	44. Waking up

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kelly does what she can to help Grizz.

The crew drove to Grizz's old house - now remastered as a clinic - pretty fast and the guys helped Kelly carry him inside.

"Get him on the hospital bed, on his stomach." Kelly instructed.

"Kelly, you gotta help him…" an explorer said faintly.

"I'm gonna try what I can, but there's not much I can do…" she responded with anxiety in her voice.

"What do you mean there's not much you can do?! You have to save him, Kelly!" another guy stepped in.

"Who do you think I am, do I look like some fucking real doctor to you?!" she snapped.

"I get that it's not looking good, but…" some girl said.

"He's fucking bleeding out! His whole back is fucking open! My power only allows me to see where the pain is, not to heal it. I'm not Grizz, okay?" Kelly said before going back to Grizz's side.

"I'm sorry, okay? I just…I don't want him to die." the girl sobbed.

"I'm gonna do everything I can, alright? Gordie, take off his sweater, we need to see exactly how bad it is." she said.

The young man did exactly as he was told, careful not to touch his back too much.

"Argh!" Grizz screamed in pain as they took his sweatshirt off.

"It's okay, Grizz, we just need to see your back." Kelly tried to sooth her friend.

"…Sa…m…"

"What is it, Grizz?" some guy approached him.

"…Sam…Arg! Get Sam…" he winced in pain.

"Go get him, he needs to know what's going on." Gordie instructed.

"While I try to stop the bleeding, can one of you explain exactly what happened, please?" Kelly asked the exploration crew.

"A wild wolf attacked us." a girl said.

"What?!" Gordie almost shouted.

"Well, we knew this expedition could be really dangerous." Kelly calmly responded.

"I don't know if we would have been attacked if Gwen didn't have this fucking ca…" a guy said and was shushed by another explorer.

"Grizz said that we shouldn't tell people yet…" he whispered to him.

"By the way, where is Gwen?" Kelly asked.

"I think she's outside, I saw her crying in front of the hospital." Gordie answered.

"Where is he?! Where the fuck is he?!" Kelly heard Sam shouting in the background.

The deaf boy was panicking after finding Gwen crying in front of the clinic, asking him to forgive him for what she did to Grizz. He ran into the emergency bedroom, only to find his lover on his stomach, a pool of blood forming on the bed.

"Oh my God…" Sam whispered, kneeling beside his boyfriend.

"…Sam…I'm…so…sorry.." the injured boy mumbled in pain.

"It's okay, Grizz, don't talk, love. I'm here now, everything's gonna be fine." he tried to reassure his lover.

"Argh!!!" Grizz screamed after Kelly tried to wash the wound.

"I'm sorry, Grizz, there's nothing I can do for your wound to heal right now…" Kelly said seriously.

"How come you can't do anything?!" Sam asked upset.

"I'm only able to help with small wounds, you know. The other times, Grizz was there to heal the serious injuries…"

"Yeah, but…"

"Do you see any medicine diploma on the wall, Sam?! I only got out of high school, just like you all, I'm no fucking doctor!"

"Okay, okay, Kelly, I'm sorry I pressured you…I'm just worried." Sam signed.

"I'm worried too, sweetie, but I really have no idea of what to do…" Kelly apologized.

"Hum…I maybe have an idea, can I talk to you privately, Kelly?" Gordie interrupted.

"Yeah, of course, I'll be back in a few. Sam, if anything happens, if he goes into shock or has a seizure, shout for me."

"Of course." he weakly responded, not letting go of Grizz's hand who was still agonizing on the bed.

 

When Kelly left, Sam turned to find worried explorers. Suddenly his worries exploded in anger.

"And why the fuck is he the only one injured?! Did you all chicken out and left him on his own facing danger?!"

"No, it was…the wolf…"

"I don't care if it was a wolf, a bear or even a fucking tiger! What I see is that he was once again the only one getting injured so that your fucking ass would be safe!" Sam yelled as best as he could with his broken voice.

"We didn't…We didn't want him to get hurt…" some girl sobbed, looking at the bleeding whimpering boy.

"But he did anyway! He's always there to shelter you all, to take the blame, to take the hits for you, and what do you do for him? Nothing! He's the one protecting, but who the fuck's gonna protect him, huh?!"

"I'm sorry, Sam…I'm so sorry…" the girl cried more.

"I'm not the one you should apologize to, Grizz is the one bleeding to death on this fucking hospital bed right now." he answered coldly.

Sam was alarmed by the sudden silence. The fact that the explorer crew was now quiet didn't surprise him, but he couldn't hear anything coming from Grizz anymore. The latter had been whimpering in pain since he entered the room and suddenly he was completely silent.

"Grizz, honey…? You okay, love? Grizz?! Oh my God, Kelly! Grizz just passed out!" he yelled.

 

"I'm here. Excuse me, everyone. Grizz needs to rest and I'm gonna ask you all to go home, please. Sam, you're the only one allowed in this room for now." Kelly said, reentering the bedroom and checking on the injured boy.

"Please, help him…" some explorers said on their way to the exit.

"I'll try my best." Kelly responded while Gordie took a few steps towards Sam.

"Sam, we have to talk." he told him with a very serious look.

"Tell me, what is it?" he signed worriedly.

"As you can see, this wound is really deep and Grizz is gonna bleed to death long before the wound scabs over. We're not doctors and I don't know what we should medically do, but without any equipment or anything, I only have one thing in mind…" Gordie explained slowly to the deaf boy, to be sure he clearly understood what was going on.

"What is it, Gordie?" Sam asked carefully.

"We have to cauterize the wound." the young man said with conviction.

"Cauterize? Yeah, okay, let's do that. You anesthetize him and then do what you have to do." Sam nodded in agreement.

"Here is the thing, Sam. We have absolutely no idea which anesthetic we should give him. With his weak heart, if we give him something too strong or that goes against his heart medication, we could loose him." Kelly said, sitting in front of Sam.

"What are you implying?" he whispered in angst. He knew exactly what she meant.

"We won't be anesthetizing him." Gordie answered bluntly.

"There's no fucking way I'm gonna let you do that to him."

"Sam…"

"Don't Sam me! You're telling me you wanna fucking burn his flesh! Without any anesthesia! You're fucking crazy!" he shouted.

"Do you prefer him suffering for ten minutes or bleeding to death?!" Kelly yelled back.

Sam didn't respond anything. He knew she was right and that was what fucking annoyed him the most.

"We're no doctor, okay? You come here bringing a deathly wounded young man with a heart condition and want us to do miracles! I don't know what I'm doing, okay?! That's the best solution we have right now, go with it or just let him die, your choice!" Kelly screamed angrily.

Sam didn't say anything for a few seconds, shocked by his friend's outburst. He understood her; she was put under so much pressure with this medical position and everybody was just assuming that she could do anything when she was just like the others : faking it.

"Sam, Grizz is my friend too. I hate hurting him, but if it the only way to save his life, I won't hesitate for a second. We're loosing precious minutes right now, he passed out and we don't know the exact amount of blood he has already lost. You have to choose fast." She told him gently.

"Do it." he whispered, looking at Grizz with what seemed like unbearable sorrow.

 

"Help me tie him to the bed." she instructed Gordie.

"No, don't tie him, please." Sam argued.

"Sam, the pain's gonna be intolerable for him, we can't let him move too mu…" she answered sadly.

"Don't tie him. I'll get him to stay still. Just…Don't tie him. His father used to tie him to his bed when he…you know. I don't want him to see us as the same as this bastard…" he pleaded her.

"Alright, but you'll have to keep him from moving too much then. The wound is pretty long and deep, it may take a while." she agreed.

"Okay."

Kelly and Gordie prepared a burning iron stick before approaching Grizz. When the instrument was ready, they asked Sam to hold him tight on the bed. The deaf boy closed his eyes when they made the first contact. Suddenly, Grizz regained consciousness.

"Argh!!!" he began screaming.

Sam opened his eyes and maintained his boyfriend's body as still as he could.

"Grizz, calm down, I know it hurts, but it's the only way! Just, try not to move to much." Sam told him panicking.

"Argh! Stop! Stop!!!" the injured boy shouted relentlessly.

Sam cursed himself for allowing his lover to be put through such pure torture. He tried to stay calm even though Grizz was agonizing under his hands. After a few minutes of screaming in pain, the young healer lost conscious again.

"Kelly, he's unconscious!" Sam freaked out.

"It's normal, it's the pain. Check his heartbeat to be sure he's not having a seizure." Kelly instructed calmly.

She had never done something as horrible for her whole life and hated herself for it. The room was filled with an awful smell of burned flesh and she was really close to throwing up. Sam checked his lover's pulse and gave her a thumb up. They finished cauterizing the wound and very soon the blood stopped dripping from his back.

"Alright…We just have to disinfect the injury and we'll let him rest. If he wakes up, Sam, can you get him to drink some water, please? He has to stay fully hydrated and sleep as much as he can." she informed the now crying deaf boy.

"He's gonna be fine now, Sam. You don't have to worry anymore." Gordie half smiled at him.

"Thank you…Thank you for saving his life." he sobbed.

Kelly and Gordie finished what they had to do and exited the room. The young man ran to the bathroom a few seconds later and threw up for a few minutes. Kelly walked up to him and comforted him by patting him on the shoulder.

"What did we just do, Kelly…?" he sobbed quietly.

"I know, I know, Gordie."

"We're monsters. You saw his back, he's gonna be scarred for life."

"He already was. We just did what we had to." she tried to convince herself.

"It's Grizz we're talking about. We just burned his fucking flesh, Grizz's flesh." he went on.

"Yeah….I'll never forgive myself for hurting him like that." she whispered.

"Me neither." he cried in her reassuring arms.

 

Sam never let go of Grizz's hand and slept beside him on the uncomfortable hospital bed. When morning came, Grizz slowly woke up to an unbearable pain.

"Sam…?" he whispered gently, shaking his boyfriend a bit to let him know he was awake.

"Grizz? Hey love." he smiled tenderly.

"What happ…Argh!" he winced in pain as he tried to sit.

"Don't move, hun, you're still badly injured. What do you remember?" Sam asked him curiously.

"We were in the forest and a wolf attacked us. He tried to charge at Gwen but I put myself between them. Then I remember a huge pain in my back." he tried to recall, panting because of the pain.

"Do you remember anything after that?"

"Well, I think I heard Grizz 2.0. growling, but I'm not sure. Then a lot of people were moving around me. After that, I only remember seeing you here and an awful pain on my back, but that was surely a dream." he shook his head, trying to remember more.

"It wasn't a dream, Grizz. The wolf sliced your back and there was nothing we could do to stop bleeding…Kelly and Gordie had to cauterize the wound before you bled to death." he said with grief.

"They…burned my back…?" he asked in horror.

"Yeah…" Sam answered sadly.

"Hey, love. It's fine, okay? I'm here with you now, I'm alive. Even if they had to burn my flesh, they still saved me and allowed me to stay by your side for the rest of my life." Grizz smiled to him gently.

"Yeah, they saved you and now you're stuck with me forever." he giggled.

"Where are the others? I have to talk with Allie. Something happened in the woods." Grizz said seriously, his face in pain while he was trying to sit.

"Well, about that…Allie's not the leader of New Ham anymore." Sam said in exasperation.

"What the fuck?!" Grizz asked surprised.

"Yeah, Campbell organized some president elections when you were away and took the power with Harry, Lexie and the Guard pretending Allie had tried to cheat during the votes." he explained.

"What the actual fuck! This is a fucking coup."

"Yeah, I know it's messed up." Sam agreed.

"You said…The Guard sided with Campbell…?!" he whispered.

"Yeah."

"Did…" he didn't even finished his question before Sam interrupted him.

"Yes. Luke joined them too."

"That's not possible." Grizz said.

"He did, Grizz. I don't know what Campbell did to convince him, but he's with them now. Allie and Will are kept prisoner in some hidden place and everything is fucking falling apart." Sam said seriously.

Grizz listened carefully and when Sam was done, he started getting up on weak legs.

"Wow, hold on. What do you think you're doing, Grizz? You were still unconscious a few minutes ago and I'm sure your back is hurting like hell, you can't…" Sam was interrupted by Grizz.

"Sam. This town will soon fall apart if we let Campbell take the lead. I was gone for a whole week and I lost a full day resting on this hospital bed. Yes, my back hurts, yes I'm still not well enough to do anything, but there's no fucking way I'm gonna let Campbell ruin this town and do nothing." he said sternly.

"But…" Sam tried, following his lover out of the room and down the hall.

"No buts Sam. I love you and I know that you're only worried about me. Thank you for that, but you have to let me do this. This town, it's a new beginning for a lot of us and we can't let some asshole change it into a living perverted and abusive hell. This town is ours. This town is the town where Eden will grow up. This town is the town where we'll get married one day. Everything is possible here, everything's anew here. We can't let him already taint this innocence." Grizz stated, getting out of the clinic.


	45. Taking our town back

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Grizz tackles the problem head on.

"Grizz?" Kelly called as she saw her friend get out of the clinic.

Grizz stopped dead in his tracks.

"Kelly…" he turned to her with sad eyes. He knew exactly how hard it must have been to hurt him for his own good.

"Grizz…I'm so sorry." she sobbed.

"It's fine, Kelly. You had to do it. It's alright now, I'm sorry you had to do that." he told her, drying her tears.

"No, it's not fine, I hurt you…badly. I'm so sorry. You're gonna be scarred forever because I didn't know what to do and…"

"Kelly. I'm alive thanks to you, that's all that matters. As for the scars, you saw my back, I'm pretty grateful that this huge scar will be able to erase all the others. I'm happy that I was able to protect the others."

"You shouldn't have had to be the one getting hurt again, it's not fair." she still cried.

"I'm fine now, right? It's alright, don't worry, honey." he smiled to her.

Gordie joined them outside.

"Grizz, you should be laying in bed, it's not good for you to be up." he told him with an apologetic look.

"It's alright, Gordie. I have to go, I have to make things right. And by the way, I know you assisted Kelly cauterizing my wound, thank you for that." he smiled to the young man.

"Please take care of yourself, do what you have to do, but…just be careful, alright?" he asked his friend with concern.

"I have Sam by my side, it'll be alright." he walked away, greeting the two medics.

 

Sam helped Grizz to Harry's house. Before entering, Grizz turned to his boyfriend.

"That's where we part, love." he signed to his deaf lover.

"What?! Are you fucking kidding me, Grizz? I'm not letting y…."

"Sam. I knew that you'd be against it, but I absolutely can't have you and Campbell in the same room. He wants to hurt me, and he knows that I'm not afraid of physical pain. The only way he's gonna get to me is by hurting you and I can't let that happen." he interrupted him.

"I know, but…"

"It's gonna be fine, Sam. I know I put you though so much lately and I'm sorry for that, but you have to trust me one last time. After that, I promise I'll never ask that of you, but this time, just this time, please let me do that by myself." he begged him.

"…Alright. But if you don't get out of this house safe and sound, I'll come in to kill you myself." he smiled sadly.

"Deal. I love you, Sam Eliot, don't ever forget that." he giggled.

"Yeah, yeah, kiss my ass." he laughed before kissing him.

"I love you too, Gareth Visser."

 

After Sam took off, Grizz knocked on the door. He waited a few seconds and Harry opened.

"Grizz, what a nice surprise."

"Don't play dumb with me Harry, where are they?"

"I don't see who you're talking about, man." Harry smiled.

"Are they in here?" the healer asked, pushing Harry aside and making his way into the house.

There in the living room were Campbell, Lexie and the whole Guard, discussing security matters.

"Grizz! I didn't expect you here so soon, how are your injuries?" Campbell smiled devilishly.

"Grizz! Hey bud, how was your wild trip?" Jason got up with a huge smile.

Luke didn't move, not even looking up at his best friend.

"Cut the crap, Campbell. I know you were the one planning on us dying in these woods." Grizz snapped at him before heading straight to Luke.

"You're not even greeting us, dude? We missed you so much." Jason feigned being heartbroken.

"Not now, Jason. Luke, we have to talk." he said.

"I've got nothing to say." Luke answered coldly, still not looking up from the ground.

"Oh, you've got nothing to tell me? Alright." he grabbed his best friend by the collar and dragged him in the bedroom next to the living room.

"What the fuck, Grizz?! Let me fucking go!" Luke argued.

The young injured man slammed the door and turned to his upset friend.

"Don't what the fuck me, Luke! You team up with Campbell while I'm gone?! What were you thinking for God's sake?!" he yelled at him.

"Oh, don't start, Grizz! You weren't here, okay?! You were gone and probably dead for all I know, so don't start lecturing me! I was there and had to fucking deal with Campbell while you were in the woods with your grizzly friend!" Luke yelled back.

"Oh, poor Luke, you had to deal with Campbell, you want a gold star?!"

"Yeah, I fucking deserve one. Don't piss me off, Grizz. You're my friend but I'll beat the crap out of you if you don't stop interfering with our business."

Grizz suddenly shoved him against a wall.

"You think you're the only one that can use strength to threaten others, Luke? Don't make me laugh. And I suppose you guessed I was dead because Campbell told you so, huh?! Well, you know what, yes, I could have died because this asshole put capsules that drive wild animal crazy in our bags. You tell me I wasn't there, but where were you when I had to face this fucking crazy wolf?! You think you're the only one that was in a bad situation?!" Grizz asked him.

"I…I had no idea…" the quarter back whispered in shame.

"Exactly. You had no idea. So don't go and assume I was on vacation when you had Campbell to deal with. We were both in bad places, but I chose to fight against it, and you, what did you do?! You just went with it!" Grizz yelled again.

"I didn't have a choice." Luke answered coldly.

"We always have a choice, man. What did this bastard tell you to convince you?" Grizz calmed down a bit.

"You have no idea." Luke said, shaking his head.

"So tell me then! How can I fucking know if you don't tell me anything? Come on, dude, we're on the same side, remember? Let's make things right." Grizz loosened his grip.

"He threatened to hurt Helena. He first recruited Jason and Clark to have all the guns and muscles on his side and then threatened me. I didn't want to team up with him, Grizz. I refused categorically but when I wanted to go, he said that I shouldn't forget who had the guns now…" he told his best friend, completely exhausted.

"Luke, I'm sorry. I should have been here. And I'm sorry for what I said before…"

"No, you're right, I just went with it and didn't fight like you would have. It's just…I can't let him hurt her, you know how important she is to me."

"I know, man, I know. We're gonna make this right. You and me against the world, remember?" he smiled to his best friend.

"Yeah, you and me. Is it true, though, what you said earlier about him planning on killing you in the woods?"

"Yeah, the bastard put those fucking capsules in our bags. First we saw Grizz 2.0. and he went completely mad on me. I was able to calm him down with my powers but when this wolf also attacked us, I couldn't do anything."

"How did you get out of this? Are you hurt, Grizz?" Luke asked worriedly.

"Yeah, he injured my back badly. The others brought me home unconscious and Kelly had to cauterize the wound for me not to bleed to death. Hurt like hell cause they didn't use any anesthesia…" he admitted.

"What?! They burned you without any anesthesia?! What's wrong with them?!" Luke exclaimed.

"Don't blame them, they did what they had to keep me alive."

"Well, are you alright now?"

"Barely hanging on, my back hurts like hell, I woke up less than an hour ago…"

"Dude, you should have rested. You have to take care of yourself, Sam would kill this whole town if anything else happened to you."

"I'll rest only when this city is safe from Campbell. But thanks though, I won't overwork myself, I promise." Grizz smiled to him.

"Alright. So, what's the plan?"

"First, do you know where he keeps Allie, Will and the guns?" he asked him seriously.

"I know where the guns are. He keeps them on his old house's basement. As for Allie and Will, they're locked in this house, in the bedroom on the first floor."

"Okay. We have to get Jason and Clarke back with us and secure the guns to be sure he can't use them against us."

"I'm pretty sure he and Harry have their own guns with them though. Don't worry about Jason and Clarke, they only agreed to this because he said he would make you major if you ever came back."

"Okay, I'll let you deal with the Guard then. I'll get Allie and Will. Let me make a few calls first."

"A few calls?" Luke asked him, surprised.

"Yeah, I'll get Sam to get the guns out of his old house and make sure that Helena is fine and stays home."

"Alright, it's good having you back, man." Luke hugged his best friend.

"Thanks, it's good to be back." Grizz smiled.

 

After Grizz had made his calls, both went back to the living room.

"So, as you can think, I'm not gonna let you ruin this town, Campbell." Grizz said seriously.

"Who said anything about ruining this town, my dear Gareth?" Campbell smiled.

"Cut the crap. I want you to free Allie and Will. Now." he said in a threatening tone.

"We can't do such a thing. They're in custody because they tried to cheat. We don't like cheaters here." Harry intervened.

"We all know they never tried to cheat. Your little election was just a facade to make your coup. Allie never wanted to be the leader, she wouldn't cheat during a fair election." Grizz said calmly.

"Oh, you think so, Grizz? Do you know that she was the one who agreed to send you to the woods to get you out of the way? She considered you a threat and immediately got rid of you." Campbell giggled.

"I don't believe you, and I don't care. Free them now, Campbell. I'm loosing patience here."

"Or what?" the new leader asked seriously, standing up to Grizz's level.

"Or I'm gonna have to get them back by force." Grizz responded as seriously, hovering over the Eliot.

He eyed Luke whispering to Jason and Clark in the background. They both nodded and he knew he had them back on the team.

"I don't think so, Gareth. I'm the one with the guns and the Guard. You're nothing but a weak healer with poor condition, what do you think you can do against me, faggot?"

"Don't call me Gareth." Grizz said threateningly.

"I'll call you Gareth if I want to. Just like dear daddy Logan did back at the time. I heard he liked calling you that on the tapes." he smiled pervertedly.

Grizz grabbed him and shoved him against the wall. Campbell only responded with a wider smile, which quickly went away as the young Visser punched him right on the face.

"First, leave my bastard of a father out of this, would you? And secondly, I don't think you have to Guard on your side anymore, right Jason and Clarke?" he didn't even turn to them, knowing they would support him on this.

"Right, fuck you Campbell." Clarke said.

"Nobody tries to hurt Grizz and gets away with it under our watch." Jason added.

"See, Campbell? You're on your own now... As for the guns, we know where you hid them, so that's sorted. Now, if you don't want me to punch you even harder because you threatened my best friend, you'd better hand Allie and Will over."

But Campbell didn't have any of that and was still smiling.

"Harry, get him off me, would you?" he asked his only friend.

At that, Harry pointed a gun at Grizz's head and yelled to let the leader go.

"Oh, and you thought I didn't think of that? How foolish." Grizz said calmly.

Suddenly, he turned around, letting Campbell fall on the ground and grabbed Harry's wrist. He flipped the boy over and grabbed the gun from his hand.

"What you don't know, asshole, is that after my father went into coma, I was so sick of being the "weak healer with poor condition" that I took self defense and kick boxing classes." Grizz smiled gently.

"The whole football team took military training with him to make sure that no bastard would ever abuse any of us again." Jason said, grabbing Campbell from the ground.

"Allie and Will, now." Grizz threatened Harry with his own gun. The latter freaked out and handed the key to the bedroom over.

"Thank you, buddy." Luke said, getting the keys out of his hand.

"Fuck you, Grizz." Campbell mumbled under Jason's grasp.

 

Grizz let go of the now disarmed Harry and went upstairs with Clark.

"Don't let him move a muscle, Jay." he instructed, looking at Campbell, before walking out of the living room.

"Count on me, man." he answered.

When Grizz opened the bedroom on the first floor, he found Allie and Will gagged on the bed. Clarke cut the restrains and helped the two on their feet.

"Grizz, I'm so sorry for making you go in the woods, I didn't think…"

"Shut up, Allie. We'll talk about that later." he told her coldly.

They all went downstairs and Grizz got them out of the house before going back to Campbell.

"Let him go, Jay." he asked his friend gently.

"And you, next time you try to hurt my friends or this whole town, I'll fucking kill you. And don't tell me I don't have the guts, cause I won't hesitate." Grizz threatened Campbell before turning back.

Campbell got on his feet as quickly as he could, pulled a gun out of his back pocket and aimed at Grizz. Without even saying anything, he shoot the young healer in the leg. Lexie, who was hiding in the corner all this time, screamed and Luke ran back in the house when he heard the gunshot.

"Oh my God, Grizz!" he yelled when he saw his best friend's leg bleeding like crazy.

But Grizz didn't move a muscle, he was still standing up, his back at Campbell. He just lifted an arm, showed at Luke to stay where he was and slowly turned on himself to face Campbell. He used the same trick as before with Harry and grabbed his wrist so hard that the bastard dropped the gun. Grizz pushed him hard against the wall and Campbell fell on the floor.

"You still thinking that physical pain actually hurts me shows how badly you underestimate me, Campbell." he said, picking the gun from the ground gently and kneeling in front of his enemy.

"Your foolishness almost makes me laugh, you know. You really thought you could take this town by force with us here? How cute. We're not your usual football dorks you see? And just so you know, Logan hurt me much more badly, you arrogant amateur." he smiled, making fun of him.

"So what? You're not laughing anymore now that I'm the one holding the gun?" Grizz went on.

Campbell was looking at him with wide scared eyes.

"This, is for my leg." Grizz said, shooting him in the thigh.

Campbell screamed from the pain and Grizz left him bleeding on the floor.

"You don't wanna mess with me, Campbell. I'm done being the good tolerant guy with you. You wanted war? Here it is, deal with it." he said, getting up and turning to his best friend.

"Let's go, Luke." he said, joining the others and putting the gun in his pocket.


	46. Explanation

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Grizz have explanations to do to Sam about what happened.

"Luke, could you drive me back at the clinic, please?" Grizz asked weakly.

"Man, you were so badass out there!" his best friend laughed while calling the others

"Yeah, well, even badasses have to go to the hospital after getting shot in the leg." he said, limping to the car.

"Oh my God, Grizz are you hurt? I heard gunshots!" Jason ran to them, seeing his friend's bleeding leg.

"Just need a few stitches and I'll be fine. Guys, can you all come here, please?" Grizz asked out of the blue.

The whole team gathered around him in worry and Grizz suddenly pulled them all in one big hug.

"Thank you for picking my side, guys. I missed you so much while I was gone." he whispered.

"And thank you for making us come back to our senses, dude." Clarke smiled.

"That's what I'm here for, you dumbass." he laughed.

"Well, I love you all too but we really should get Grizz to the clinic before he bleeds on us to death." Luke said, walking towards the car again.

"Let's go." Jason agreed.

 

When they arrived, Kelly, Gordie and Sam were waiting in front of Grizz's old house.

"I was sure you'd be back soon, you shouldn't be walking around with your back injury, Grizz." Kelly said, helping out of the car.

"What?! You were injured in the woods, dude?!" Jason asked surprised.

"This time it was a wolf, man." he winked at him, giggling.

He then turned to Sam with apprehension. The latter took a look at his bloody leg before signing.

"You promised you'd come back unharmed." Sam signed with a cold stare.

"I'm sorry, love." Grizz answered apologetically.

"Cut the crap, Grizz. I'm sick of this." he whispered before walking into the clinic.

His reaction broke the young healers heart to no extent.

"What's his fucking problem, dude?!" Clarke said, waving at Sam's walking form.

"Let him be, Clarke. It's fine." Grizz whispered, hiding the tears already forming in his green eyes.

"It's not fine, you did it only to get the town back from his bastard of a brother." Jason agreed with his teammate.

"How did everything go with Campbell? Did you get Will and Allie back?" Gordie asked with concern.

"Yeah he did, like a badass!" Luke laughed in the background.

"Nothing's done yet. We still have to figure out who will lead this fucking town and how." Grizz retorted coldly.

"Well, you, obviously. The whole town will agree for sure." Clarke said.

"I have no intention of leading anyone, Clarke. I'm no leader." he said, while Kelly took him inside and asked him to lay down so that she could work on his gunshot injury.

"No leader, Grizz?! Who do you think you're kidding, man? You've been nothing but a leader for the past year." Luke said.

"I don't know what you're talking about. Being the town's healer doesn't make me a leader." he answered, wincing in pain when Kelly desinfected the wound.

"Man, you got the people to open up about their powers, you made a wonderful strong speech about tolerance and taboos, you opened a fucking speaking club, you leaded the exploration crew in the woods all by yourself, what more proof do you need?" Jason told him seriously.

"I don't want this responsability. Do I need to remind you that I also shot a man in the head and had another one ripped off of his own power?" he said with shame.

"Leader's-like decisions, man. You have to stop fighting against this. Stop thinking you're not legit. People trust you, they listen to you and actually apply your advices. That's exactly what this town needs right now." Luke went on.

"I don't want to be leader, period. I hear you guys and thank you for thinking so highly of me, really. But I can't take this responsability, it's too much for me to handle." Grizz answered with honesty.

"If you say so...But we have to think about a permanent long-term solution. We can't let something like Harry, Campbell and Lexie's coup happen again." Clarke said.

"Already working on that." Grizz said as Kelly finished bandaging his leg.

"Grizz, back to the medical topic. I'm gonna give you painkillers for your back and leg. If you don't want this gunshot wound to reopen, you shouldn't move around too much. I recommend that you walk as less as possible, I'm gonna give you crutches so you don't put too much weight on your leg." Kelly interrupted.

"Thanks Kelly. By the way, Campbell is probably going to come here soon with the same kind of injury. Don't let him die, I don't want that on my conscience too." Grizz answered.

"He shot him in the leg to teach him not to mess with us." Jason whispered to Gordie with a winke.

"I'm gonna go find Sam now guys, if you'd excuse me. Luke, go see Helena and make sure she's fine. Jay and Clarke, you go hide all the guns somewhere safe like Luke's basement or something, we'll deal with that later." Grizz instructed.

"Will do, chief." Clarke answered, smiling widely.

"And you still pretend not to be the leader kind, what a waste." Jason said, giggling.

"Thanks man, for everything. I hope it goes well with Sam." Luke hugged him before going back to the car with Clarke and Jason.

 

"Sam?" Grizz whispered while knocking at his old bedroom where his lover was probably waiting for him.

" _He can't hear you dumbass!_ " he thought to himself.

He opened the door slowly and entered on his clutches. Sam was seated on his old bed and looked up at him with uspet eyes.

"How's your leg?" Sam signed, emotionless.

"Better thanks." he answered, putting his clutches against the wall and limping towards the bed. He sat on Sam's right side and looked up at him with concern.

"How are you?" Grizz signed.

"I'm fine." Sam signed back. He didn't even try to lip-synch his signing, too mad to actually try to speak outloud.

"You're not, Sam. You won't even look at me in the eyes." Grizz signed again.

"It's nothing." he answered.

"Come on, love. Talk to me." Grizz pleaded.

"What do you want me to say, Grizz?! That I'm mad at you for always worrying me and acting like it's no big deal? Or do you want me to run by your side to congratulate you on how heroic you were?! Cause I'm not! I'm sick of you playing with my nerves." he signed furiously.

"There we go, at least you're saying something."

"And how does that actually change anything? You never listen to me whether I say something or not!" Sam signed.

"I do listen to you, hun. It's just...It was complicated and I had to do it, you know that." Grizz tried to explain.

"When do you listen to me or even care about my feelings, Grizz?! When I warned you about Campbell and asked you to come back safely, did you listen to me?! When I told you not to hurt yourself last year, did you listen?! Or when I asked you to be careful in the woods, what the fuck were you thinking?!"

"And what did you want me to do?! Should I have left Gwenn to face this fucking wolf by herself just cause I had to come back unharmed?! As for Campbell, you were the one who asked me to do something!"

"I never asked you to face him by yourself! I should have come with you to confront him!"

"And what do you think would have happened, Sam?! When Campbell shot me, he was aiming at _me_! There was other people in the room, but the one he targeted was me, because he hates _me_! You think that being there would have changed anything? Wake up, Sam! You're as powerless as Luke, Clarke or Jason were!"

"You're wrong, he's my brother, I could have settled all this without using violence." Sam signed more calmly.

"I'm sorry, hun, but since when does your brother actually listen to you? It's Campbell we're talking about, he doesn't care about you or this town, he only cares about himself." Grizz retorted.

"Your only solution to all your issues is always violence Grizz!"

"That's not true." he said in shame.

"Not true?! Which issue hasn't ended in blood?! When you were feeling bad about killing Dewey, you decided to slit your wrists instead of trying to talk about it! When Lexie went against Allie, you threatened her instead of talking with her about her opinion and the reason why she acted this way! And now, Campbell isn't on your side so you decide to shoot him instead of settling things smoothly! No wonder he shot you back!"

"You're insulting me, Sam. You know I'm not like that. First, I slit my wrists cause there was no one I could speak to at the time. For Lexie, I'm sorry if I acted like a dork but she fucking deserved it after humiliating Allie like that. As for Campbell, I don't know what you heard from downstairs but your fucking brother was the one to shoot me. I only shot him back in the thigh to show him that violence has consequences and that I'm not gonna lay down like a good dog anymore." Grizz said, shaking a bit.

"You still shot my brother, Grizz. What's next? You're gonna hit me, just like your father did with you?" Sam signed seriously.

"Wha..." Grizz lost his voice in shock. His eyes filled with tears and Sam instantly saw how badly he had hurt him. But he didn't care, too angry to measure the weight of his words.

"Yes, I said it! You scare me, Grizz! You threaten people, you shoot them, you're as violent as your abusive father used to be!" Sam almost shouted.

"How can you say that to me...? I'm nothing like my father, all I always do is try to help people." Grizz said weakly, his eyes wide with hurt.

"I'm not like you, Grizz. I can't live around so much violence, be it to help people or not. I can't defeat wolves, I can't shoot people or threaten them like it's nothing. I don't want to live this way."

"And you think I do? Don't you think I've had enough violence during my childhood for a lifetime?! I hate it. I hate that I had to fight against bears, wolves, I hate that your brother forced me to shoot him. I don't want to live like that either, but that's life, you don't always do what you want. This whole fucking new society situation is the source of the violence, I'm not."

"You're the one always saying we have the life we choose. But you're also the one always imposing violence into my life. I'm sick of always waiting for you to come back injured and worry all the time. It's not fair to me." Sam signed, turning his head.

"I'm sorry, Sam. I love you and I hate myself for putting you through so much. But that's who I am. I can't let an innocent girl get injured by some wolf and do nothing. I can't let a fucking psychopath take over our town and just watch him do as he pleases. I know it's a lot to ask, but I have to help people, ending injuring myself or not. If you love me, that's something you'll have to accept." Grizz almost begged.

"Do you hear how selfish that is? You're asking me to agree with you always taking risks and endangering your life for some fucking greater cause?!"

"That's exactly what I'm asking of you." Grizz signed seriously.

"I refuse then. I love you, but if you're as selfish as to go on with your dangerous way of living, then I'm out. You can't force me to bear with that any longer and if you're not ready to change, I'm sorry but you're gonna kill yourself without me watching." he signed angrily before standing up and walking out of the room.

 

Grizz watched him stand up wordless before realizing what had just happened. When he understood what those words meant, he tried to go after him but his injured leg gave in and he ended up on the cold floor.

"No...Sam! Please, don't go!" he yelled, but his deaf boyfriend didn't hear a thing and exited the room without a second glare.

"Please...Sam...Don't leave me here on my own... _Please_..." he sobbed on the floor.


	47. Author's apology

Hey sweeties !

I'm so sorry for this long break, I have really a lot on my plate right now and I have exams till next monday so I won't update before august 26th...  
I'm so so sorry for that, please bear with the wait ❤

I already have thought about what's coming next in the story with my best friend AlwaysInWonderland and believe me, you're not ready ! Hahaha

I love you all so much, thank you for your support and please, please, do not give up on my story, big things coming in the next chapters ❤❤❤


	48. The Team

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> What will happen after Grizz and Sam's argument...?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you so much for the long wait !
> 
> I now finished my exams and will be able to write more often :))))))
> 
> Hope you enjoy this chapter, love yooouuu !

"Maybe we should go make sure he's alright...?" Kelly whispered to Gordie.

A really angry Sam had left the clinic half an hour ago, slamming the door shut. Gordie and Kelly had then heard loud sobbs coming from Grizz's bedroom upstairs. It wasn't difficult to understand what had happened. They respected his privacy and hadn't checked on him but he had been completely silent for a good ten minutes and Kelly was beginning to feel worried.

"No, he needs some alone time." Gordie answered.

At this moment, the front door opened with a loud noise and their eyes widened as they saw Harry half carrying Campbell.

"Kelly, you need to help me." Campbell mumbled, obviously shameful to ask for help.

"Grizz shot him i..." Harry started but was interrupted by Gordie.

"In the leg, we know. Come here, we'll stop the bleeding and patch you up." Gordie said, jaded.

As Campbell limped his way to the hospital bed, they heard the upstairs bedroom's door open and soon Grizz came into view from the stairs.

"You!" Campbell almost shouted.

"Oh shut up. I don't have the energy to deal with you now." Grizz mumbled, making his way to the exit.

"But I'm not done with you, fag! You fucking shot me!" Campbell shouted, grabbing him by the shoulder to force him to face him.

"Let go of me. Now." Grizz said with a cold stare.

Campbell's face lit up with a smile when he saw that his eyes were red and puffy, he had obviously been crying.

"Oh. I see that my faggot of a brother didn't like you shooting his family in the leg." he giggled.

"Fuck you." Grizz answered sharply and got out of Campbell's grip.

"Hahaha! That's amazing. Even he can't put up with you anymore, that's fucking perfect!" Campbell laughed.

Grizz ignored him and walked straight to the front door. Before leaving for good, he turned to Kelly.

"I'll be at Luke's if you need me. We're gonna have a meeting at the church this evening, don't forget to come after dinner." Grizz whispered and left.

 

He heard Campbell's loud laugh inside as he was heading to Luke and Helena's house. He pulled his phone out of his back pocket and called Jason.

"Hey bro, what's up." Jason answered.

"Are you finished with the guns? Could you meet me at Luke's?" Grizz asked codly.

"Hum, yeah we're already there. Is everything alright Grizz? You sound...distant." Jason worried.

"I'm fine. See you in a bit." he mumbled before cuting off.

" _Gosh, I don't have the nerve to deal with any of this shit_." he thought to himself, sighing loudly.

 

When he arrived, the team was waiting for him in the living room and Helena was in her room with Elle.

"So, we need to figure out what to do." Grizz said without greeting any of them.

"Okay...I see someone is in a bad mood." Luke whispered to Jason.

"Did something happen, man?" Clarke asked nonchalantly.

"I'm fine." he answered coldly.

"You're clearly not fine, Grizz. Come on you can tell us anything." Jason added.

"Can't you just leave me then fuck alone?!" Grizz snapped at them.

"Wow. Don't talk to us like that, Grizz. We're just trying to help. What the hell is wrong with you?" Luke said seriously.

"Well, I just came back from the woods where a fucking wolf tried to kill me, only to get here to clean your fucking mess, Campbell shot me in the leg this morning and I think Sam just left me. So you pushing me to be all joyfull and happy really isn't helping!" Grizz said angrily.

"I get that it's a rough time for you, but you can't blame us for wha...Wait, what?! Sam broke up with you?!" Luke said.

"What?! Sam left you?!" Clarke almost shouted.

"What the fuck, dude?!" Jason exclaimed.

"Yeah, he just told me that he didn't want to go on like this and just left." he whispered almost shamefully.

He was still really angry and sad but he now felt bad for taking it out on his three buddies. He didn't think that talking about it would actually do anything, but knowing that he wasn't alone in this somehow comforted him.

"I'm gonna kill him." Luke said, getting up and walking angrily toward the exit.

"Count me in." Clarke seriously answered.

Jason just watched his healer friend with big round eyes. For him, Sam and Grizz were THE goal couple, nothing could tear them apart. He wanted to just shrug it off with some joke like he always did but seeing now Grizz's puffy eyes just told him how serious this situation was.

"Nobody's gonna kill anyone. Thank you for looking after me, but he's right, we shouldn't be together if my way of living is too much for him to handle." Grizz sighed, crawling on the sofa.

"Too much for him to handle my ass!" Clarke said furiously.

"He's just some fucking asshole if he thinks he can just get rid of you like that! I'm not gonna stay put and watch him hurt you again! I'm gonna sma..." Luke yelled but was interrupted by Jason's quiet voice.

"Luke. You don't get to talk about Sam like that. He's still the man Grizz loves and he's our friend." he said, gently sitting next to Grizz.

That sudden kindness and maturity froze the three other young men who stared at him for a few seconds before Grizz spoke up again.

"Thank you, Jay." he whispered.

"Of course. Now, why don't we talk about this quietly, without getting upset over something we don't know a thing about." Jason watched Luke and Clarke seriously.

They both went back to their sits, not daring to say anything else.

"That's sweet of you, but we don't have time for that. We need to think of solutions for the town and..."

"No, Grizz. We have to talk about it. Now. The town can wait a few more hours, all threats are gone for the moment." Jason said, getting up to get them all some relaxing tea.

"He's right. You're allowed to take some private time to deal with your own issues, man." Clarke said, calming down.

"Hum...Are you sure, guys? I don't want to annoy you with my love life or anything..." Grizz said shyly, fidgetting.

"You're not bothering anyone, dude. We're your friends, team and family. That's completely fine." Clarke added with a soft reassuring smile.

"Yeah, we're here for you, Grizz. And by the way...I'm sorry for threatening to hurt the man you love...again." Luke said with shame.

"It's fine, Luke. It's great to know that you're ready to avenge me anytime." he answered with a small wink.

Grizz felt immensely relieved to be able to talk about it quietly with his friends. It had been ages since he actually got to spend some time with them without it being related to the Guard or the town. He desperately missed them and really needed them by his side at this exact moment.

"So, now that everyone is calm and chill, mind telling us what happened?" Jason came back with four cup of warm honey tea.

"Thank you." Grizz said, grabbing the hot cup in his cold shaking hands.

The two other boys grabbed theirs and the whole team allowed Grizz the time he needed to answer the question without any urgency.

They all understood how pressured Grizz had been those last few weeks with the expedition and Campbell's coup. He never had any moment for himself, constantly mandated, and they knew how it had deeply affected his relationship with Sam, without him even knowing it. They all felt his need to confide in someone and the last thing they wanted for him right now was to feel obligated to do or say anything.

"Well, I don't even know where to start..." Grizz mumbled, suddenly feeling really shy.

"It's okay, man. We're not gonna judge you or anything. If you don't feel like talking about it, it's fine too. Just know that you're not alone in this." Clarke said with a gentle warm smile.

When did his best friends develop such maturity? After the abuse, they had all trained together to get stronger for his sake and they had had a few serious confiding moment, but never before had he felt so comforted by their simple presence.

"No, it's fine, I want to talk about it with you guys." he said before taking a big gulp of his warm tea.

He paused for a second, trying to clear his head.

"You know...Since my father fell into a coma, I've always been alone at home and had to deal with everything on my own. Be it the chores, the financial aids, the school, the house, everthing. As you all know, I really needed this independance after everything that had happened. But I didn't think that I'd actually begin to want to solve everyone's issues by myself. I think that this behavior, with time, leaded me to try to sort everything on my own, only relying on myself. I don't like people getting into trouble because of me and would do anything to avoid such situations, even putting my own life in danger." Grizz confessed without confidence.

"Yeah, you've always been kind of uninterested in your own safety as long as it could help others." Luke added to show him that he had their full attention and support.

"Yes, exactly. Thing is, I never really cared as long as it only involved myself." he went on.

"But now Sam is also involved in your safety, right?" Clarke asked in a comforting way.

"That's the problem. I adopted this behavior for years without even thinking twice about it so it's really hard for me to let go of it. And even more now that we're in a worrying new situation and that this town's organization is only hanging by a thread." Grizz paused a few seconds to drink a gulp of tea, calming his now racing heart.

Luke, Clarke and Jason didn't say anything. Grizz needed this time to be his and they felt the need to let him go through his whole reflexion before daring to say anything.

"I feel like it's my duty to help everyone, I always have. Maybe the abuse my father put me through all those years really took a hold on my self-confidence, to the point that I always feel like I have to prove my worth by helping everybody, I don't know. Maybe it's also linked to the nature of my power, I also don't know. The only thing I'm sure of is that it's now part of who I am and that I simply can't help myself. And it was fine by me...until Sam came along." Grizz whispered the end, feeling tears threatening in his green trusty eyes.

"It's okay, Grizz. You can let go, we're not here to judge you." Jason whispered, placing a friendly reassuring hand on his back.

Grizz took a big breath and went on with his explaination.

"Now that I have him by my side, everything's different. I can't only think about my own feelings anymore. I have to consider both our sentiments and I understand that my way of always putting myself in danger is terrible for him, but I can't change who I am. I can't make this huge part of my personality go away just because he asks me to. I really want to, but I don't even know how. I don't know how to live without being like this..." he stopped talking, looking up from his cup of tea.

He found three pair of eyes staring straight at him with the most gentle and supportive gaze he had ever seen. Their faces didn't show any pity or judgment, only compassion and tolerance. He felt himself relax at the only sight of their familiar tender features.

"It's okay, Grizz. It's fine to need time to get adjusted to the presence of a loved one by your side." Luke said softly.

"But I don't feel like it's ever gonna go away, Luke. It's just part of who I am." he sighed, looking down at his fidgeting hands again.

"Grizz. Look at me, please." Jason said, lifting his chin just a bit.

His eyes met Jason's brown ones and the young member of the Guard felt the sudden immense need to help this wonderful friend of his.

"As you said before, this self endangering and selfless behavior was something you had to develop to cope with everything that had happened during your childhood. You were forced into this way of thinking because of the need of appreciation and acceptance caused by your father's abuse. It was never part of who you are, only some kind of shield against your own low self-esteem and tormented mind. If I'm being honest with you, I think that the only thing you did was to find some way of seeking acknowledgment and approbation from people around you, consciously or not. Valuing your life goes along with the concepts of self-worth and self-love. You never valued yourself much and exteriorized it by putting yourself in danger for the sake of others." Jason said, with complete sincerity.

Grizz didn't dare to say anything, his attention was completely focused on Jason's way of thougts. The latter knew that his words were a bit harsh and maybe rude, but what his friend needed the most at this time was pure sincerity and guidance. So he went on.

"But now you're comfronted to someone who loves you deeply and for the one you really are. You don't need to prove anything to anyone now. Whatever you do, whatever you say, someone will always accept you and love you unconditionally. This someone is Sam Eliot." he smiled gently at the thought of this pure unlimited love.

Grizz was watching him with wide eyes and large tears running freely down his redden cheeks. How come Jason had understood everything so fast, saying the exact right word in the exact right way?

Jason felt proud that his friend was letting himself go like that without any fear of being judged or laughed at. He had made so much progress since his childhood and was now letting himself feel for himself for the first time in a long time. Jason smiled softly.

"It's not gonna be easy, you know. Changing your way of behaving after having integrated it in your life for so long is hard. But you're strong. Your mind is indomitable, your heart brave and your love pure. There's nothing that can stop you as long as you never doubt yourself or this relationship. The world is yours Gareth Visser, and Sam is one lucky bastard to have you in his life." he giggled.

A huge smile cracked on Grizz's features and he quickly hugged Jason, happily sobbing on his shoulder. The latter was a bit surprised but hugged him back with a tender smile, rocking their bodies gently to soothe his fragile friend.

"Yeah! Group hug!" Luke laughed loudly.

"Woohoo!" Clarke joined them.

They both jumped on the couch by their friend's side and the piece of furniture suddenly rolled backwards. The whole team ended up stacked on top of each other, laughing their head off.


	49. New Organization

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> How to organize the town and deal with personal issues at the same time?

"What the hell is going on here?" Helena asked, running down the stairs.

She had suddenly heard a loud noise coming from downstairs and then just laughs. She arrived with Elle in the living room to find the football team - aka the Guard - laughing and hovering over Grizz's tall frame on the ground.

"Oh my God, are you alright Grizz? Are you hurt? What happened?" Elle asked worriedly.

"Ahahah! Stop! Guys, stop!" the two young girls heard the healer scream, laughing hard.

"Don't worry, girls. Just some tickling Grizz operation. He's used to it." Luke turned to them with a wide smile before walking to Helena.

"You know there's only one way out of this, man! Just surrender already!" Clark giggled.

Jason was straddling him to keep his body from struggling under his friend's endless torture.

"Yeah, don't pay attention girls. We've been doing this for years, we were born for it! Ahahaha!" Jason chuckled.

"Okay, okay, I surrender! Please just stop! Ahahaha!" Grizz went on.

Jason and Clark let him slowly compose himself before helping him on his feet.

"How do you feel now, dude?" Clark asked with a huge grin.

"Much better, thanks guys." he answered, hugging his two buddies.

"Of course, man. Anything for you." Jason told him with a reassuring and relieved gaze.

They stayed in a warm meaningful embrace for a few seconds before letting go.

"Urgh, this is so gay." Helena said, sighing with a disgusted look.

"Ahaha you have no idea." Luke said, winking at her.

"Stop it, just the sight of such unatural attraction to another man repulses me. It's disgusting."   
Helena added before turning to go to the kitchen.

 

The Guard stood frozen for a few seconds in silence before understanding what she had just implied.

"Excuse me?!" Jason asked angrily.

"What the fuck did you just say?!" Clark snapped, surprised by her words.

Grizz just looked at her with a somewhat sad and astonished stare.

"You know exactly what I meant." she sighed.

"No we don't." Luke said coldy.

"Oh come on, stop pretending that this is normal or even okay. I love you Grizz and it's not your fault, you're just sick, but really, I'll never understand." she told him with confidence.

"It's not a sickness..." he mumbled, looking down ashamed.

"Whatever you call it. I didn't say anything at first but I won't let you contaminate the whole Guard with your selfish disgusting sexuality." she said, making herself a sandwich as if it really wasn't a big deal.

His heart jumped at her words. He took a few step back.

"What the fuck are you talking about Helena..? Are you fucking serious?" Luke asked in amazement.

Grizz had started fidgeting with the bottom of his shirt in shame. He didn't even dare to look at her hateful and disappointed eyes. He had never really faced homophobic insults except for Campbell, but he didn't give a damn about him.

"Yes, I'm serious. You're even lucky I'm kind enough to let him walk into my house to do his gay-ish things here. I know you're long time friends, but I'm pretty convinced he has a bad influence on you." she said quietly as if Grizz wasn't in the room.

The young healer began shaking a bit as a panic attack was dangerously threatening the back of his mind.

"I can't believe it. Really, Helena? I didn't take you for a disgusting homophobic." Clark whispered.

Grizz only wanted to curl on himself and forget any of this ever happened. He had had such a heart warming moment with his friends only a few minutes ago, how could things escalate this fast?

"Oh don't start with me. I left him the fuck alone till now. I'm not the one responsible for his sins." she shrugged him off.

His heart was pounding hard.

"Do you have any idea of everything he did only to keep you safe from Campbell and his little crew? You ungrateful brat." Jason spitted.

Sweat began running down his temple.

"Don't talk to her like that." Luke said coldly.

His whole body was now shaking more and more violently.

"What?! You have to be kidding, man. She's standing here insulting Grizz and you're okay with that?!" Clark asked, surprised again.

_Boom_.

"I don't say I agree with her. But it's her opinion and we have to respect it." Luke said, trying to calm down his friends.

_Boom. Boom._

"It's not about opinions, Luke. She's humiliating Grizz as if he wasn't even here, you can't possibly agree to such a cruel behavior." Jason retorted.

_Boom. Boom. Boom._

"What cruel behavior?! I didn't chase him out of the house, did I?! You're all too overprotective over him. He's maybe weak but I'm not humiliating him or anything." Helena defended herself.

_Boom. Boom. Boom. Boom! Boom!_

"He's not weak! You're talking about something you have no idea of! You don't know him, you just see him as a freak because of your fucking God!" Clark yelled.

_BOOM! BOOM! BOOM! BOOM! BOOM! BOOM!_

"Hum, Grizz...? Are you okay? You're a bit pale." Jason whispered to him quietly in a reassuring tone.

He couldn't answer. The only thing he could feel was his heart about to explode in his chest and his trembling body.

"Grizz? Oh my God, you're shaking like crazy! Grizz, it's okay, calm down." Jason tried to sooth him as Clark, Helena and Luke were still yelling at each other in the background.

"I...I..." he trying to mumble but nothing came out of his mouth anymore as dark spots were appearing in front of him.

"Guys! Stop screaming! You're freaking him out!" Jason interrupted their hateful fight.

All the heads turned suddenly to Grizz. All the attention was too much for him.

"I...I'm...sorry..." he whispered before passing out.

"Grizz!" Luke yelled, running to his friend to help Jason grab him on his fall.

"See what you did to him?!" Clark yelled at Helena.

"I didn't do anything, he's just too weak to take a few criticisms." Helena said, before turning to go back to her room.

"What the fuck? You're just leaving like that?! When you're the one who put him in this state?!" Luke snapped, sick of her bitchy behavior towards his bestfriend.

"He'll be fine, he has his babysitters by his side." she answered, before slamming her door shut.

"I can't believe her." Clark sighed angrily.

"She's not the one you should be worrying about right now." Jason told him coldly.

"Jay, help me lay him on the couch." Luke whispered.

They put Grizz's limp body on the couch, grabbed him a glass of water for when he wakes up and waited. When they saw his eyelids flickering, they kneeled by his side.

 

"Grizz? Hey buddy, you there...?" Luke whispered gently to him.

He slowly opened his eyes, still feeling like shit.

"Wha...What h...happened...?" he mumbled, trying to recall the reason he was now laying on the couch.

"Don't worry about it, man. Just Helena being a bitch. How are you feeling?" Jason asked quietly.

"My head a...and my back h...hurt." he tried to say.

"It's gonna be okay, buddy. Just rest for a while, we'll be upstairs if you need us." Luke said.

"Here's some water, you have to stay hydrated, man." Clark added.

"No! No, please, don't leave me alone..." he suddenly came to his senses. He didn't know what he was so scared of but he knew for sure that he didn't want to be alone at the moment.

"Okay, okay, we're here." Jason soothed him.

"Thanks...So, hum, where is Helena...?" he said, moving into a seated position now that his head was feeling a bit better.

"She flew to her room. She probably knows how wrong she was." Luke said, eyeing Clark to shut up.

"Okay..." Grizz answered, looking down in shame.

"Hey, man. Don't believe a word she said. You're not contaminating us or anything. You're our best friend and perfect just the way you are, right?" Jason finished his sentence turning to his two other teammates for support.

"Yeah, he's right. Nothing's wrong with you or the one you love." Clark said, smiling reassuringly to his fragile friend.

They waited for Luke to say something but the latter stayed silent.

"Hum, you agree, Luke, right?" Jason elbowed him.

"Yes, yes, of course I agree. Sorry guys, I'm kinda shocked by Helena's way of reacting. I never knew this side of her..." Luke said, looking towards the stairs sadly .

"I'm sorry..." Grizz mumbled, feeling bad about possible issues between Luke and his lover because of him.

"You have nothing to apologize for, man. You're not responsible for her behavior. I guess it's just something I never knew about her. That doesn't mean that you're the one to blame in anyway." Luke turned to him again with a small smile.

"Alright, now that everything's clear. How about we change subjects? We still have a town to organize, right?" Jason said, trying to ease the mood.

"Yeah, the town." Grizz said, putting his ideas back in place and trying to forget about what had just happened.

"Do you have any plan yet, Grizz?" Clark said, sitting at the table and grabbing some papers out of his bag.

"Yeah. I think I have everything figured out, but I need your opinion on it and I'll need your help to organize everything." he answered, getting up with the help of Luke and heading to the table.

"Okay, let's get to work." Jason said, grabbing a sheet of paper, prepared to write down every idea Grizz could come up with.

"Right, so, did any of you ever think about why the leading organization we have now can only lead to failure?" Grizz asked them.

He didn't want to just expose his plan with them listening. He wanted this to be a group reflexion.

"Hum, cause we only have shitty leaders except for you?" Clark answered seriously.

"Nope. That's the thing, you see? When a country has leading issues, we always blame the president or leader but never the whole leading organization. It's the same in America. Everybody always points at the president, but never the leading organization. Who said it was a good idea to have one single person leading a whole country, or in our case, a group of people?" Grizz explained seriously with a passionate gaze.

"What do you mean? You think we shouldn't elect a president? Let people regulate themselves?" Jason asked.

"That didn't work till now, dude." Luke added.

"No, I'm not saying that we should just abondon any leadership because those things are only natural. Even if we let things like that with no president, someone will always stand out as a leading figure, that's how human society works. No, I want to establish something like in Switzerland." he finished with a little playful smile.

"Switzerland? What are you talking about?" Jason laughed a bit, not taking him seriously.

"I'm talking about the Swiss leading organization, man. Do you have any idea how things work out there?" he answered.

"I have no fucking idea of how things work in Switzerland, dude, and I don't give a damn. We're in America for God's sake, who cares about European shit?" Luke giggled.

"First, we're not in America, we're in some fucking parallel universe. And secondly, we have to build something new, why not try something different and that seems to work pretty well in an other country?" Grizz said desperately.

"Okay, fine. So, Switzerland?" Clark settled things down.

"Yeah, Switzerland. In Switzerland, there's no president, no senate or anything. Switzerland is leaded by a group of seven people, all from different political party and representing different opinions. One of those seven people leads the assembly but doesn't have any superior status or anything. He's only there to organize things and delegate work. His voice isn't more important than the other six's, everyone is equal." he explained with a huge smile, fascinated by the thought of a different kind of organization.

"Really? So when they have decisions to make, who has the final word?" Luke asked, now interested.

"They all do. All decisions are voted within the assembly and nothing is done unless all of them agree to it." he smiled at his interest.

"Hum, you wanna do this here?" Jason asked, eyes wide.

"Yeah, we could create a council that will take decisions together. This council will be leaded by a president who will organize the meetings and the different things dicussed. The president will change every month and council elections will be arranged every five month. These elections will include all the citizens and we won't tolerate any cheating or political manipulation. What do you think about that?" Grizz asked with confidence.

"I think it's awsome! That prevents any leading abuse and allows everyone to really feel included." Jason answered happily.

"Speaking of including everybody, we will also take exemple on Switzerland for the laws. We're not gonna apply actual laws cause that would take forever, but everybody will be able to submit ideas to improve the town's organization. All they'll have to do will be to submit a clear change proposition signed by at least a quarter of the citizens. Then the council will think about ways to actually apply the proposition and will ask for everyone to vote on it." Grizz explained, showing his idea with a few scheme.

"Gosh, you really have everything figured out." Clark said with an amazed look.

"I'm totally in, that seems like a great plan!" Jason exclaimed.

"Me too!" Clark added.

"By the way man, how do you know all this shit about Switzerland?" Luke giggled.

"Well, it's interesting." Grizz laughed.

"And I suppose you also speak German like in Switzerland! Ahahah!" Jason added.

"I don't. Half of Switzerland speaks French anyway." he answered still chuckling.

"Oh and you do speak French. I remember when you were always trying to speak with us in French but we didn't give a damn! Ahahha!" Jason went on.

"Why do you always know shit I don't?" Clark mumbled with a smile.

"You know what? I'm gonna call you Monsieur French from now on, Grizz!" Luke laughed.

"Ok, not happening." he laughed back.

 

An hour later, they were finally done and waiting in front of the church to announce their plan.

"Hello everybody. Thank you for coming here tonight. Exceptionally, I'll be the one doing the talking because there apparently were a few problems with leading related matters." Grizz said seriously.

He was completely on leader mood and everybody was listening to his every word.

His eyes met Sam's blue ones and he suddenly felt his body tense. He felt really anxious about his fight with him, but in the same time, after what the Guard had told him, he felt confident that this relationship could really work out. He wasn't doubting himself anymore, only worried about Sam accepting him back or not. But he knew he couldn't think about that now so he focused again on the task at hand.

"Okay, so first, the good news. I came back with the expedition group to announce you that we found land and that future agriculture lands will be available as soon as we're done preparing them. So, please applaud the whole expedition crew!" he said, beginning to clap in his hands towards the little explorer group.

Everybody cheered at them.

"Yeah, thanks guys. Next, I was informed that you had some kind of president election while I was gone. Of course, it is every citizen's right to choose their leader and such an election is actually a great idea. But unfortunately, someone cheated and manipulated the whole election to its adventage." Grizz said seriously.

He heared whispers about Allie and Will all over the assembly.

"I'm not talking about Allie and Will, I'm thinking about Campbell, Harry and Lexie who used guns leverage to take the power." he said seriously.

Everyone shut up, not believing it.

"I'm serious. Allie and Will were released from custody this morning. But that doesn't really matter now. What we have to think about is the future. We have to establish a long term leading organization. I have something to offer..." he said.

He then explained his whole plan again for the whole town. Everybody was clearly in and decided to call it a day and to organize elections during the next week. When they were done, Grizz joined the Guard and headed towards the exit. He felt a little tap on his shoulder and turned around. He was met with Sam's blue eyes and Allie waiting behind him.

"Can we talk?" Allie and Sam said at the same time.

" _This is gonna be a long night_..." Grizz thought to himself.


	50. A new "friend"

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Grizz deals with Allie and Sam makes an unexpected new friends... Watch out for this one!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Really long chapter today, probably to make it up to you all for not posting in so long ˆˆ'  
> Comments are more than welcome as always, sweethearts !
> 
> Hope you like it!
> 
> Love you all

"Can we talk?" Sam and Allie asked at the same time.

"One at a time, please. Allie you go first, Sam maybe we can talk later at home?" Grizz asked apologetically.

"Okay, see you then." he said with a disappointed look.

" _Good job, Grizz. Now he probably believes I think that Allie is more important than him_..." he mentally slapped his face.

Allie was about to say something but he didn't want to talk to her in front of everyone. He had tried to convince the town that she was innocent and getting angry at her in a crowd was a bit counter productive.

Grizz took her hand and brought her in a quiet place.

"Okay so now spit it out. What did you do and why did you do it?" Grizz told her, crossing his arms.

"Grizz, I'm so sorry! I didn't mean for anything bad to happen to you." she answered.

"I don't care what you thought was right, just tell me what you did. Did you really side with Campbell?"

"I did. I'm sorry, I was afraid that people didn't want me to lead them anymore. I was scared and you were the best candidate. I know what I did was wrong but I didn't want to hurt you... I just wanted my city back while you were gone." she tried to explain.

"Cut the crap. You don't have any city to get back. It's not yours, you're no president! You're only a leading figure, that doesn't mean you have every right!" he snapped at her, angry at her apparent lack of modesty.

"I know that what I did was wrong, I'm sorry! I don't want to hurt you anymore than I already did..." she said desperately.

"I thought we were friends." Grizz answered, sadness all over his features.

"We are! I didn't mean to hurt you."

"You knew how risky this expedition was going to be, especially for me with my heart condition, and you decided to send me there anyway...just for your own profit!" he said. He was so sad and angry.

"I know, I'm sorry..." she almost cried.

"Were you aware of the caps?" he asked coldly.

"Which caps? What are you talkin about?"

"I'm talking about the capsules Campbell put in our bags to drive animals crazy, Allie!"

"What?! I didn't know any of that, I'm sorry! If I had known, I wouldn't have let him do it!"

"Well, I almost died and all the expedition crew was endangered because of this. You lucky everything went okay and I ended up only slightly injured, because if someone had died in the forest, you would have been responsible for it and you would have to live with a murder on your conscience. Believe me, you don't want that."

"I didn't know... I'm sorry, I was selfish and only thought about myself and my own ambition. I'm glad you reorganized the leading of this town, I think it's going to be really great!" she smiled a bit at him.

"Thank you, I'm glad you support the idea." he answered coldly.

"By the way... if you want someone to take the leading president's role for the first 5 months, I'm here and I'm ready to be leading again." she said with a wide smile and a little wink.

"Are you fucking serious right now, Allie?!" he asked, out of amazement.

"What?! What's wrong? I'm only offering my services, you know I make a great leader." she winked at him, taping his shoulder.

"Fuck you, Allie! And I thought you had learned your lesson, but you obviously still are as selfish and arrogant as before! You won't be leading anytime soon, count on me for making sure of that!" he yelled at her

"Well fuck you too, Grizz! You just want this town for your own benefits!" she shouted back.

"I'm not like you, Allie, don't forget that."

With that he walked away without even glancing back. He was so fed up with her attitude and her a selfish behavior. He had other things on his plate.

 

During this time by the church.

"Hey! You're Sam right?" a young man asked him with a huge grin.

"Hum, hi? Yes, I am. Who are you?" Sam signed and whispered at the stranger with curious eyes.

"I'm Nathan. I'm so glad to meet you! I've been waiting to meet you for months!" he said with a friendly wink.

"Well... thank you, but why?" Sam asked, even more curious and slightly embarassed.

"You were the first proud gay man in this town. You're my model, you're amazing!" he laughed a bit.

"Oh... Then, thank you?" Sam answered awkwardly.

No one had ever looked up to him for anything and even less for him being gay and out of the closet. It was great to hear another man than Grizz saying that he was amazing.

"Do you have any time now? Maybe we could grab a snack or go to my house and just get to know each other?" Nathan offered with a gentle friendly smile.

Gosh... was he flirting with him?!

"Actually, I don't know. I'm not sure..." Sam answered with a blush.

He looked to his right and saw Grizz, Luke and the whole team discussing leading organization matters. Suddenly he realized that he was fed up with the whole "Leading town" thing. Maybe he needed some time with other friends and other people than just Grizz to have some fun with instead of always talking about serious matters like Campbell, the town or his lover's abusive past.

"You know what? Okay, let's go to your house and let's get to know each other. I assume you're gay too seing what you told me before?" Sam asked him.

"Yes I am. I wasn't out of the closet until two months ago, but when I saw you and how free you seemed to be, I just couldn't wait anymore." he smiled at the deaf young man.

"Wow, free? It's true that I never thought about it that way."

He never felt really free with Grizz and had always been forced into dangerous and violent situations by his side. No freedom at all.

Maybe the only thing he needed right now was to just let it go and have some fun. With Grizz, it was always drama over drama. It was either Campbell, his traumatic past, Allie, Luke or anything and he was just sick of it.

"Let's go have fun then!" the ginger deaf young man smiled widely.

 

Grizz saw him walk out of the church, talking with this Nathan guy.

"Luke?" he asked him out of the blue.

"Yeah, buddy?"

"Have any idea who this dude is?" Grizz asked his best friend.

"Hum, I think this name is Nathan. Helena spoke about him last week I think." Luke said, looking towards the two young men making their way to Nathan's house.

"What's his deal? Why is he with Sam?" he said, possessivity and jealousy written on his face.

"Don't be like that, man. He's just making new friends, it's a good thing. Stop being paranoid." he half laughed.

"Yeah, you're right, it's his life. I'm glad he's making new friends." he said, still pouting a bit.

"You should go home, Grizz." Jason said.

"Why?" Grizz asked, surprised.

"You haven't taken even one second for you since you came back from the forest. You should just go home, have some private time, enjoy your piano or your violin, even sleep if you need to." he added with confidence.

"Yeah, I know, but we still have to deal with the-"

"No discussion, you're going home." Luke giggled a bit.

"Okay, okay. I'm going home, see you later guys." Grizz smiled while leaving.

 

Grizz went home as he was told and sat in his old home's living room, thinking about how he was gonna apologize to Sam later.

"Hey, Grizz. What are you doing here? Did your injuries reopen?" Kelly asked him, walking in the living room.

"Hey Kelly, no no, don't worry, I'm fine. What are you doing here?" he answered.

"Well, did you forget we installed a whole clinic here? You're actually sitting in the waiting room so I thought you were just a patient." Kelly giggled a bit.

"Oh yeah, sorry, I have a lot on my mind." he said, trying to smile reassuringly.

"What's going on?" she asked, sitting next to him and handing him a cup of warm tea.

"Oh nothing, just the usual stuff."

"Grizz, you can talk to me, you know. The Guard aren't the only ones supporting you when things get bad." she smiled softly.

"Thanks Kelly. Well...As you know, we had a fight with Sam and he kinda broke up with me..." he said almost shamefully.

"What?! Sam broke up with you ?!" she almost shouted.

"Yeah, he told me he wouldn't go on like that if I refused to change my way of living." Grizz said, looking down.

"Well, you're living kind of a dangerous life, that's for sure, but it's no reason to leave you like that! He should h-"

"No, Kelly. He has every right to break up with me with the kind of behavior I had lately. I don't want him to leave me, but I deserved it."

"Are you just gonna let him give up on your relationship like that, Grizz?! I know you better, the Grizz I know would never let the love of his life throw everything away just because of a fight." Kelly said, lifting his chin up.

"I'm not giving up on us, Kelly. I'm gonna talk with him tonight to make things right. I'm ready to change my way of living if it means keeping him by my side. I love him and I know he loves me too, breaking up just because I'm too selfish to make efforts and consider his feelings would hurt us both too much." he answered with wet eyes.

"Of course he loves you and of course you're meant to be together. If you're gonna make things right, then what's the problem?"

"Well...I'm afraid he'll reject me. I'm scared that he won't ever take me back or that he won't believe me to be capable of changing for him." he said, putting his hands on his head.

"It's gonna be fine, Grizz. Sam loves you, I'm sure he'll be more than thrilled to see how far you're ready to go for him. It may take a while for your relationship to go back to how it was before all that, but you're a strong couple, everything will work out just fine." she smiled at him.

"You...You really think so?" he asked with pleading eyes.

"Of course I do, hun. You'll soon be back in his arms and you'll see that everything works itself out when people are in love." she laughed lightly.

"Thanks, Kelly. Really, it means a lot."

"Don't thank me for that, big guy. You guys are the most badass adorable couple I've ever seen, nothing will ever tear you apart." she winked at him.

"I hope so. By the way, don't you have patients to attend to or something? I don't want to keep you away from your obligations."

"It's fine, just Campbell and his little crew in the room upstairs."

Grizz thought for a second before talking again.

"Kelly, I'm so sorry to have been absent from the clinic for so long. It's not fair of me to leave you on your own to deal with all the medical issues in the town. I'm the head medic and yet, I'm never helping you here..."

"Grizz. Are you fucking kidding me?" she looked at him with an astonished look.

"What? Of course not, I'm really sorry."

"Man, you'll never change. It's fine, you were busy with the whole expedition and then took Campbell down before establishing new rules and rebuilding the whole town's organization. You had much better things to do than just hang out with me at the clinic. I'm proud to be able to take care of the medical wing for you and I'm glad to be able to relieve you from this responsability." she said with a huge smile.

"Yeah, but-"

"No buts! I can handle this by myself, don't worry. Gordie is here to help me and there's not a lot of patients anyway."

"Okay then. Thank you, you're doing an amazing job here." he smiled at her.

"Of course, I'm your badass assistant. Hahaha" she laughed with him.

They talked a bit more before Kelly left to check on Campbell's injury. Grizz decided that just staying here, rumbling about Sam wouldn't be constructive at all and went downstairs, grabbing his violin.

 

During this time, Sam and Nathan were talking and laughing while watching a TV Show on Netflix.

"Well, that's what I call Netflix and chill." Sam whispered, smiling.

"Yeah, or Netflix and chill with an amazingly beautiful guy." Nathan winked at him.

After lipreading what he had just said, Sam's cheeks caught fire. He was so embarrassed.

"Hum...You know, I've never done anything like that..." he signed and whispered.

"Netflix and chill? How did you survive highschool without it?" Nathan laughed.

"No, I mean...This, between us..." he went on, fidgeting in embarrassment.

"Oh, you mean, flirting?" a huge grin appeared on Nathan's face.

"Yeah..."

"Well, I thought that you and Grizz-"

"No. It was never like that. Of course I was really appealed by him since the beginning but we began dating because he was in a bad place and needed someone by his side, in reality. After that, I fell for him more each day because he's handsome and incredibly kind, but with him, everything seems kind of tainted by traumatizing events... It's all drama and crying, I'm tired of that." Sam confessed with a deep blush.

"I understand, I'm sorry it's not what you expected." Nathan answered in total honesty.

"It's actually really refreshing to spend some time with you, Nathan, thank you for that."

"Of course, Sam. I'll do anything for you, even if it's just to make you feel better for one evening, I'm glad I'm able to help." he said with a huge smile.

 

After a little blank, Nathan asked Sam about his hearing.

"So, will you always be deaf, like, is it a permanent thing?"

"Yeah, I'll normally won't hear ever again. But Grizz and I are having healing sessions that are actually helping me and he thinks that one day soon, I'll be able to hear all fine again." he answered with a huge smile at the thought of hearing again.

"Oh, that's great, cause being deaf really sucks. I mean, I guess people sometimes make fun of you or something, not really great for the reputation." Nathan sighed, as if it was bothering him a lot.

"What? What are you talking about? I don't care about reputation, I just wanna be able to hear again."

"Yeah, of course. I'm glad you'll soon be able to be normal though. I don't really have the patience to learn ASL." he smiled warmly at the ginger boy.

Sam smiled back weirdly and they watched their TV Show for a bit before Nathan asked something again.

"So, hum... Are you and Grizz still a thing or..."

"I sincerely don't know. I kinda broke up with him recently but we're supposed to talk tonight to maybe sort things out." Sam answered.

"Oh, I see. And what are you gonna tell him tonight?" Nathan asked, interested.

"I don't really know. I just know that we need to talk. I'm probably gonna apologize, the way I left him hanging last time was really rude of me and I said really harsh undeserved things to him." he said, with a sad glaze.

"If you don't mind me asking... What did you two fight about?"

"No, I don't mind, Nathan, I trust you. When he injured himself by taking Campbell down, I kinda lost it. I didn't understand how he could be so reckless knowing I was waiting for him to return unharmed. He always put everyone before him and don't hesitate to take unimaginable risks to keep us all safe. It's really noble and respectable but he's not conscious that his actions have concequences on the people who love him and who worry for him every single day."

"Yeah, it's not really fair to you..."

"I asked him to change his way of living because I can't deal with so much violence in my everyday life but he told me that it was just the way he was and that keeping everyone safe was his top priority."

"How selfish..." Nathan commented.

"It is, isn't it? That's what I told him, but he wouldn't change his mind. I love him, really, but I can't stand the constant fear of waking up to a dead body one day just because he was selfless and self-destructive."

"I understand, it must be really hard to care for someone who doesn't care for themselves. It's kind of disrespectful to you who's always here for him."

"Exactly! You know, I'm glad you're on my side, cause every person I talk to about it just tells me that I'm an idiot to give up on our relationship. This whole town worships him so much that I'm always the bad intolerant guy who dares to stand against their dear healer."

"I don't see you that way. You don't have to be defined by your relationship with him. You're Sam Eliot, an amazing young man with incredibly blue eyes and a warm happy smile; not just Grizz Visser's boyfriend." he answered with a wink.

"Well, thank you, I really needed to hear that. Hum...can I?" Sam said, pointing in his direction, meaning to ask if he could maybe cuddle a bit with his new friend.

"Of course, dear." Nathan answered with a huge smile.

Sam moved on the couch and rested his head on Nathan's shoulder.

"And tell me, if Grizz apologizes to you tonight, are you ready to take him back?" Nathan asked.

Sam lifted his head a bit to read his lips and whispered shamefully.

"I don't know..." he sighed.

"Well, then could you consider one more thing on this matter before going to meet him?" Nathan asked seriously.

"Wha-"

Before he could finish his sentence, Nathan closed the space between them and softly sealed a kiss on the ginger's smooth lips. He didn't push him or force the kiss, just waited to see if the young deaf man would reciprocate the gesture or just push him back.

At his immense surprise, Sam melted into the kiss and deepened their embrace. After a few more seconds, their lips parted and their eyes met.

Sam didn't know what to think or feel anymore. He loved Grizz, he was sure of that. But being close to this new refreshing passionate guy was making him feel really great. He hated himself for feeling this way with all his history with Grizz, but he couldn't help it. Nathan had this little spark in himself that Grizz seemed to have lost after everything he had went through.

 

He was now completely lost but Nathan's close face made him come back to reality.

"I...I'm sorry. I shouldn't hav-" Sam mumbled embarrassingly.

"I'm not." Nathan smiled with a determined look.

"What?" Sam asked, completely confused.

"I'm not sorry I kissed you. Grizz is a great guy and all, but I feel something with you and I know you also feel something for me. Forget about him. I'm not depressing like him, I'm not everyone else's hero. I'm just a lovely young man that likes you, a lot. I'm not him, I'll never have any bigger priority than your happiness."

"Hum...I'm confused. We don't really know each other. Yes, we're having a great time, but I only met you today, you don't know anything about me..."

"I don't need to. You're the perfect gay man I was waiting for. You're kind and I really like your face, no need for anything more." Nathan smiled at him.

"Wha-" Sam stopped himself, suddenly realizing something.

" _What the fuck am I doing?_ " he thought to himself.

"Come on, Sam, just be realistic, we'd make a wonderful cute couple. People will love us together. Okay, maybe at the beginning they'll be a bit upset for Grizz, but they'll come around sooner or later." he said with a smile.

Sam took a step back on the couch, avoiding any contact with the young man.

"Nathan, just tell me, what exactly makes you think you like me so much?" he asked with curiosity.

"Well, you're kind, you have a great face, beautiful ginger hair and mostly, a great ass." he winked at him.

"So, you basically like me because of the way I look."

"No, that's not what I meant. I said you were kind too, right?" Nathan tried to laugh a bit, but Sam was as serious as dead.

"You don't care about me. You don't know me and you're not even interested in knowing me." he said with disgust in his eyes.

"Of course I care about you, Sam. Or else I wouldn't have spent the whole evening with you. Come, on love, don't be grumpy just because of a kiss."

"Don't call me love." Sam snapped at him.

"Why not?" he laughed nervously.

"Only Grizz calls me lo-"

"Oh, come on, cut the Grizz crap, Sam. He never really cared about you, left you at home to go get himself killed as you were waiting for him all the time. He's just a bastard who never treated you right."

"You don't get to talk about him this way." Sam said angrily.

"Don't be like that, you were the one complaining about him just a few minutes ago. Don't be all lovey-dovey with him just because you kissed another man. He's no better now than he was ten minutes ago. He'll just keep on deceiving you and disappointing you. I bet he can't even satisfy you in bed with all his shit with his dad." Nathan giggled, trying to make fun of the healer.

"Shut up."

"No kidding, man, I'm sure he's all " _No please, don't hurt me too much"_ in bed. You deserve a real man, not some weak dude with daddy issues."

"I said shut the fuck up!" Sam yelled as best as he could with his broken voice.

"Who do you think you are, talking to me like tha-"

Sam had had enough of it. He grabbed Nathan by the collar, making him shut his big mouth.

"Now it's your turn to listen to me, you scumbag! Yes, I have some issues with Grizz but you're worth nothing compared to him. Yeah, I complain about him taking risks and putting his life in danger, but he's nowhere as selfish and egoistic as you! He knows me better than I know myself and he'll never do anything to hurt me, ever! You on the other hand, you just want some pathetic artificial relationship to be able to parade by my side as the cutest couple in New Ham! You're already judging me and calling me abnormal just because I'm deaf. You know what? Fuck you! Grizz may have flaws but he loves me for the man I am, not for how I look or how I could make him look! He makes me feel alive. Yes, he's full of self-hatred and deals with a traumatic past on a daily basis. But despite all the drama and the hard times, he's here for me! He'll be by my side through everything we could ever have to face and never would chicken out of a difficult situation just to save his own ass!"

Nathan was shocked. He had always seen Sam as some passive uninterested dude with no personality, but he obviously was wrong. He never thought he could actually have it in him to get angry like that.

"Sam, calm do-"

"Fuck you!" he yelled before grabbing his stuff and slamming the door.

 

When he was finally out of this fucking home, he ran to his house, crying. When he arrived, he went upstairs and locked himself in his bedroom. _Their_ bedroom. Grizz and his bedroom. Everything in this room reminded him of the healer ; his kindness, his tenderness, how little dimples appeared on his cheeks each time he smiled shyly, the strength in his big warm arms, his soft vanilla smell, everything. At this moment, Sam took in everything that had just happened and was disgusted with himself.

" _How could I even think of rejecting such an amazing, kind and loving man? He gave me everything and I just threw it away. We have a few fights and the first thing I do is escape into another man's arms. For what? Have some fun? Take some time off? That's not how people should be treated. When you love someone, you don't take some time off the person only because things are hard. I'm such a selfish idiot..._ " Sam thought to himself with big tears running down his cheeks.

He saw a picture of Grizz and him kissing happily on the nightstand and understood how serious this situation was.

"What have I done...?!" he whispered.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Using this little end note to thank my best friend AlwaysInWonderland again for supporting me through the horrible stuff I'm going through these days.
> 
> Love you so much girl, you mean the world to me !


	51. Anyone still there?

Hey guys, is anyone still reading this fanfiction? Cause the author I was writing it with kindly asked me to just fuck off so if no one's following this story anymore, I'm gonna quit.

If there's still a few people here with me, I'll continue it though so just tell me if you're interested in this story or not.

Love you all!


	52. Alright then!

Hey guys! Thank you so much for all your feedback and kind words, it means so much to me to know that some of you really enjoy this story ❤️

I'm really busy for the moment, have two jobs, got to move out and so many other things and I really don't know when I'll get the time to write, but seeing how sweet and motivated you all are, I'm gonna make this work and write as much as I can whenever I have time 😊

The relationship with this "friend" of mine has ended and I'm really sad about it. She's a wonderful woman and mother and even though she hates me now for reasons I will probably never really understand, I wish her the best in life. Writing this story without her will sure be harder and it's probably gonna make me cry more often than I'm willing to admit but I'll still stick to it. A lot of things that will be coming in the next chapters were originally shared thoughts, ideas and imagination and I hope that she'll be proud of this story despite her feelings towards me.

Thank you all so much for stinking up with me, it means the world ❤️

See you soon with Grizz, Sam and everybody! Till then,

Merry Christmas and I love you all!


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